Funny long jokes

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What did you do as a child that you hid from your parents? Frances Emerson Updated Nov 3, 2017 Is it okay if I tell story about something my kids hid from me? My oldest son told me this story years afterwards. He said that he and his brothers would go out in the back yard and throw knives at each other to practice catching them, like they'd seen in video games. (I'd seen nicks in my knives, but had assumed, with annoyance, that they'd used them bushwhacking.) But there's a little more to this story. After high school, he went to Alaska to work in the fisheries for the summer. When he wasn't working, he'd go exploring in the woods. There was a couple who had broken up who also worked there. The girl had taken a shine to my son, and although my son did not reciprocate, her ex was insanely jealous. One day, my son was out trekking in the woods and sensed someone following him. He turned around, and there was the angry angry boyfriend, who immediately threw a knife at him. Reacting instinctively, my son caught it. As a mother, hearing this story elicited two responses. First, I was absolutely stunned that my boys would engage in such a dangerous activity. Secondly, I sure would have liked to have seen that fellow's face. - iFunny

The Funniest Pictures of Today's Internet

Title - wow post

Batfam Memes - Bruce has to many kids

Picture memes quRMI7J37: 4 comments — iFunny

Glumshoe l like haunted houses in theory BUT l have no idea how to react when the actors speak to you. They ask me a question and ljust... answer it... The scariest part of a haunted house is the unscripted social interaction. & glumshoe Scary nurse in a creepy voice: “Do you have an appointment to see the doctor?” Me: “Uh. Do you accept walk-ins?” Scary farmer: “I like to kill people!” My friend, brightly: “I like to die!” 5% puerto-nicO Me : “Do you get dental insurance?” Zombie : TEETH?!" % schmergo This happened to me. Scary prison dude: HELLO Me: Nice to meet you! - iFunny

21 Pet Owners Who Honestly Deserve A Medal

Hollywood logic - LolSnaps

This father with 4 daughters might be the funniest dad ever - Funny

Saturniata-remade ohhh i DEEPLY regret teaching my cat how to talk & kawaii-kozume Oh? Would you elaborate? % okay so one night like a week or two ago kurt was meowing at me and one of the meows sounded like he was saying “hewwo” so since then I started saying “hewwo” instead of meowing back at him (like I do with all his cat sounds, naturally) and slowly his meows evolved into something vaguely “hewwo”like with the one or two True and Powerful Hewwo‘s a day but now that you have backstory I was just standing in my kitchen making rice, everythings dead silent, and suddenly this fucking “HEWWO??” echoes through the whole apartment and it almost killed me - iFunny

...Do Verizon "?- 9202 FM . 100%- < Messages Ethan Details So i calculated it. And it eould only take about 400 people to get enough iron to forge a steel longsword U know how fantasy books talk about swords "forged with the blood of enemies" Well icalculated it am, and if u drainked about 400 adult men kf their blood, and extracted me iron from it, u would have enough for a longsword. Forged from me blood of your enemies & kvolhbloodless - iFunny

I showed Frozen to my boyfriend and I decided to share the brilliant commentary he made during the movie,.. - iFunny

My school has some good humor