dadspin - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights
![I Cannot Play On The Fucking Floor With These Kids One More Second](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/votmhbcqreji0lhqdz5f.png)
![Why Your Children's Television Program Sucks: <i>The Garfield Show</i>](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/w0o5zndaxcphoneypzkw.png)
![Why Your Children's Television Program
Sucks: <i>Mighty Morphin Power Rangers</i>](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/k1yfh1racjxvjivqbsjn.png)
Why Your Children's Television Program Sucks: <i>Mighty Morphin Power Rangers</i>
A look at the awful children’s programming you’re forced to endure before you can finally kick the kids out of the TV room to watch sports for eight hours. Image by Jim Cooke....
![23 Things I Say To My Kids Every Goddamn Spring Break<em></em>](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/cgn2xhtesnst24pzwyi5.jpg)
23 Things I Say To My Kids Every Goddamn Spring Break<em></em>
I am a dad at all times but Spring Break is when I am, without fail, at my MOST dad. It combines all the prime elements of flustered dadding: travel, overpriced food, renting things, lines, dealing with people behind counters, frantic searches for alcohol, and such and such. It’s not so much a vacat...
![Use Some Goddamn Headphones<em></em>](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/wgxcabybr1skymqola0r.jpg)
Use Some Goddamn Headphones<em></em>
Here is a take for you: Wear some goddamn headphones when you watch a video in public....
![The Actual Night Before Christmas<em></em>](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/b8fbzh0mr7hrsyw103hx.png)
The Actual Night Before Christmas<em></em>
‘Twas the night before ChristmasAnd all through the house…Not a damn thing was ready....
![Fuck Sports Bottles<em></em>](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/txv7ykynnygsjz63bqjf.jpg)
Fuck Sports Bottles<em></em>
I thought I was done. My kids were no longer babies, which meant no more formula, which meant no more time laboring at the sink, hand-washing 90 separate Dr. Brown’s bottle parts and leaving them soaking on a dishtowel to dry. That part of my life, as far as I was concerned, was over....
![Finish Your Food Before You Serve It](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/q9xcwtggoe5nkgdzr7kv.jpg)
Finish Your Food Before You Serve It
It’s the smallest thing, really. Maybe you already do it! But maybe you do not already do it, and you have wondered why the food you cook always seems underwhelming. Probably there are lots of reasons why the food you cook always seems underwhelming, not least among them your pathological inability ...
![Dig A Hole At The Beach](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/zwt9cs2eygeq37odtnv5.png)
Dig A Hole At The Beach
I’ve been taking my kids to the beach for years now and in that time we have brought along any number of cumbersome, worthless beach toys: bulldozers and rakes and sand trowels and bad frisbees and this little wheel thingie where you put water in the top and it makes the wheel go spin-spin. I have c...
![Neighbors Are Hell](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/xduvdqprfups5htta4mj.png)
Neighbors Are Hell
When I was a young kid we knew all the names of pretty much everybody in our whole little neighborhood. The kids were a pack; in the summer, when your parents kicked you out of the house after breakfast—everybody did this—you just found the other kids and skulked around until somebody came up with ...
![The Nine Scariest-Ass Things About Owning A House<em></em>](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/ike8aopgg9wzkvm7cynp.jpg)
The Nine Scariest-Ass Things About Owning A House<em></em>
I own a house and the thing about home ownership is that it is a lifetime project. At any given moment, there is something about the house that needs addressing. There is always a PROJECT, and some homeowners like having such projects. They like to constantly spruce things up and tend to the landsca...
![Children And Sunscreen: A Guide To Summer Hell](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/yc4dfhudr361uolbukd8.png)
Children And Sunscreen: A Guide To Summer Hell
Every year I look forward to summer before remembering that summer is, in fact, hell. There are bugs. There is swampass. There are bored children punching each other for sport. And there is suntan lotion. Ohhhhhh, suntan lotion. Oh how I DESPISE you with a concentrated fury. Is there a more necessar...
![A Q&A With Tony Reali About Postpartum Depression And Anxiety In Dads](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/r6rwvp1gx4pzxs5zcaxp.jpg)
A Q&A With Tony Reali About Postpartum Depression And Anxiety In Dads
Tony Reali, the host of ESPN’s Around the Horn, always wanted to be a dad: “I wanted a whole team of kids. I’ve said this to everyone with ears.” So when he experienced what he called an attack of postpartum anxiety one Sunday afternoon in September 2015 when he was home alone with his one-year-old ...
![LeBron Tells LaVar Ball To Fall Back](https://images.deadspin.com/tr:w-900/f6mrtypug4rcjgfmk6lj.jpg)
LeBron Tells LaVar Ball To Fall Back
One of the many outlandish claims that Lonzo Ball’s dad LaVar made on his recent press tour to proclaim the supreme basketball ability of his three sons was that his kids were set up for success in the NBA more than LeBron’s two sons. Specifically, Ball said that LeBron’s sons aren’t primed for NBA ...