mario-balotelli - Sports News, Headlines & Highlights

If the Lightning can’t choke you out, Andrei Vasilevskiy willThe narrative, the easiest one to reach for which is generally what most hockey observers want to do before hitting the bar, is the two-time defending champ Tampa Bay Lightning must be playing great defense because the Florida Panthers have scored just three goals in three games. And while that’s no...

Baseball is less fun when NO ONE MOVES THEIR BACK ROWSporting leagues should enact a per game minimum of fun-yet-stupid plays attempts. For the NBA, each squad should be required to take at least 15 30-foot plus jumpers. There should be at least two trick plays per team in NFL games. I don’t know what it is for soccer or hockey. Maybe it’s something a...

Mario Balotelli Does Thing, Then Posts Thing On InstagramMario Balotelli is currently in the midst of one of the upswings of his notoriously yo-yoing career, which is good for all lovers of fun and hijinks. Yesterday, in just his sixth match with Marseille since fleeing there in January from the personal doghouse he’d been confined to at Nice (again, the ...

Mario Balotelli Does Thing, Then Posts Thing On Instagram

Mario Balotelli is currently in the midst of one of the upswings of his notoriously yo-yoing career, which is good for all lovers of fun and hijinks. Yesterday, in just his sixth match with Marseille since fleeing there in January from the personal doghouse he’d been confined to at Nice (again, the ...

Mario Balotelli Scores Wonderful Goal, Talks Shit About Referees

When last we heard from our favorite mohawked madman, Mario Balotelli, it right about this time last year as he came to the close of what turned out to be an unexpectedly impressive but still quintessentially Balotellian inaugural season with Nice in France. We are delighted to inform you that since...

Happiness Is Watching Mario Balotelli Drive PSG Insane

Mario Balotelli’s Nice hosted Paris Saint-Germain this weekend in what was a hugely important match in the Ligue 1 title race. Nice did what they’ve done all year and upset the odds by whooping up on PSG by a score of 3-1, and Balotelli scored a pretty goal to kick off the beatdown. By the end of th...

Mario Balotelli Missed Start Of Match Because He Tied His Shoes Too Tight

Mario Balotelli’s blistering start to his career in Nice has cooled off some of late. No doubt eager to get back to scoring ways, Balotelli tied his boots nice and tight before stepping out onto the field against Nantes this weekend. Only he soon realized he’d tied them too tight and had to get a co...

Mario Balotelli Takes Break From Doing Good Mario Things, Does Bad Mario Thing

Mario Balotelli is still thriving out in France, scoring eight goals in nine league appearances for out-of-nowhere Ligue 1 leaders Nice, so things aren’t all bad. What is maybe a little bad is that yesterday, for the first time this season, Good Mario gave way to Bad Mario, when the Italian striker ...