Schools
'We're Going Back In Time': LI Community Rallies Over Pride Flag Ban
"If you want to scream at us and say that we don't deserve to have that right to love, we're going to scream louder."
![Maureen Mullarkey/Patch Media](https://patch.com/img/cdn20/users/25459216/20221012/020724/styles/patch_image/public/img-1068___12132617139.jpg)
BOHEMIA, NY — Long Island is reacting to Gov. Kathy Hochul's investigation into the Connetquot School District, after more than 200 people rallied over the district's ban on hanging Pride flags in classrooms, followed by an intense school board meeting on Tuesday night.
LGBT Network staff, as well as Connetquot students, teachers, families, and community members of all ages, donned rainbow colors and held homemade signs outside Oakdale-Bohemia Middle School from 6 p.m. until the 7:30 p.m. meeting in support of a teacher who refused to take down a Progress Pride flag in her classroom.
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According to staff emails, a student reached out to administration after feeling "uncomfortable" by a Progress Pride flag hung in the classroom of Sarah Ecke, a math and special education teacher at Connetquot High School.
![](https://patch.com/img/cdn20/users/25459216/20221012/012910/styles/raw/public/processed_images/connetquotflag.jpg)
A Progress Pride flag has an additional five-colored chevron to the classic Rainbow flag, and includes black and brown stripes to represent marginalized LGBTQ+ communities of color. It also has pink, light blue and white, colors to represent the Transgender Pride flag.
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Ecke had both the Rainbow flag and the Progress flag in her classroom, which was at least twice the size of her American flag.
"The teacher in this classroom was asked to remove the Progress flag, but could continue to display the other flag in the room, which was the traditional Pride flag," Superintendent Lynda Adams said in an email obtained by Patch.
@longislandpatch Governor Kathy Hochul ordered an investigation into the Connetquot Central School district, after a teacher was prohibited to hang a Progress Pride flag in her classroom. #longisland #longislandnewyork #longislandpatch #patch #connetquotcentralschooldistrict #connetquothighschool #oakdalebohimeamiddleschool #lgbtnetwork #lgbtq #lgbt🌈 #lgbtqi #lgbtqia #lgbtqtiktok #governorhochul ♬ original sound - longislandpatch
When the teacher refused, the district enacted Policy 1310 "which states that school employees shall not engage in political activities" on school premises.
All flags except for the American flag and the New York State flag were ordered to be taken down, the district said.
Dr. David Kilmnick, president and founder of the LGBT Network, spoke at the rally, in support of Ecke.
"The Pride and Progress flag is a symbol of inclusivity," he told Patch. "It's a symbol of love. It's a symbol of safety and our kids need to see in our school, because our LGBT kids are bullied three to four times higher than other youth."
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Eliza Irwin, a Connetquot student who identifies as lesbian and openly gender queer, told Patch she felt frustrated and upset by the school's ban.
"Us existing is not political," she said. "We just we want to be able to say that we're proud of who we are. It's just basic human rights."
Liz Irwin, Eliza's mother, also attended the rally alongside family. An alumnus of the school district, she was shocked to learn of the school's ban.
"I don't understand how, in this day and age, we're at a place where we don't believe every American citizen deserves representation under the American flag, but we're not there yet," she said.
According to The Trevor Project, LGBT youth are four times as likely to attempt suicide than their peers due to mistreatment in their community.
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"When a flag goes up, and you force it down, regardless of what sign you plan on replacing with it, you send a very transparent message," she said. "Those represented under that flag, which are the Black, indigenous, people of color, trans, and otherwise queer youth, in that school should hide, they should be ashamed."
Liz told Patch that when she was in high school, anti-bullying campaigns didn't exist. Only a few months after graduation, a friend, who happened to be biracial and bisexual, committed suicide.
The educators, students and parents who stood today in Connetquot demonstrate the importance of standing together. Every student & educator deserves a safe and welcoming school . That is what the Pride and Progress flags represent. @nysut @NYSPTA pic.twitter.com/NeZuFOvptS
— Randi Weingarten 🇺🇦🇺🇸💪🏿👩🎓 (@rweingarten) October 12, 2022
"He never had support among the community," she said. "I thought that the district had taken great pains to correct those types of glaring problems. And here we are 25 years later, and we're still fighting that fight."
Last month, the district was listed under this year's PEN America's Banned Books List for banning "Gender Queer: A Memoir" by Maia Kobabe.
"What we're seeing here is what we're seeing in a growing number of school districts here on Long Island, which is an extremist reaction to different LGBT themed things," said Robert Vitelli, executive vice president and chief operating officer for the LGBT Network. "That these things should be removed as a way to protect kids, when really all of these things are about creating a safe space are about inclusion."
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Meghan Fawcett, of Sayville, who did not attend district schools, said she felt the need to attend the rally, as a member of the LGBTQ community.
"It feels like we're going back in time rather than forward," said Fawcett. "Just, allow people to have rights, especially children who are discovering themselves and learning how to love. They deserve that."
Later in the evening, the crowd moved inside the middle school for the school board meeting. Jackie Napolitano-Furno, board president, addressed the issue at hand, explaining how a student felt uncomfortable about the Progress Pride flag in Ecke's classroom, and "immediately looked into" their concerns.
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"Before we proceed with our meeting, the district would like to address a matter that has been garnering media attention in recent days, as we would like to correct the miscalculated rush to judgment that is being rumored to have occurred at Connetquot High School," Napolitano-Furno said.
"Earlier this year, students reported feeling uncomfortable about a flag that was being displayed on the wall in a particular classroom directly adjacent to the American flag," she continued. "This flag, which was at least twice the size of the American flag on display, was the Progress Pride Flag. The reference to the size of the flag is merely being provided in order to give a visual reference to its placement in the classroom."
Ecke, was asked to compromise by keeping the Rainbow flag hung, but take the Progress Pride flag down.
"The district strives to provide a safe and supportive learning environment for all," said Napolitano-Furno.
"We recognize that the decision to unilaterally implement the policy on the display of flags has been met with mixed reactions. It is our hope that you understand that it was not made lightly, not without full consideration of all involved, and not with a malintent."
Several people spoke out about the ban.
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Tony Felicio, Jr., president of the Connetquot Teachers Association, was the first speaker.
"We are here tonight to support our colleague,"he said. "Today is about a Pride flag. Tomorrow it's you or some other teacher on another issue."
He also called out Napolitano-Furno, representing the association's simultaneous rally for equitable pay, for disrespecting teachers.
![](https://patch.com/img/cdn20/users/25459216/20221012/013446/styles/raw/public/processed_images/connetquotboard.jpg)
"Research clearly shows that our students by simply having a flag up in the room, research shows it saves lives," said Felicio Jr., who received a standing ovation from the crowded auditorium."
After a 20-minute recess, Kilmnick also spoke at the podium, announcing that the governor had directed the Division of Human Rights to investigate potential violations of Human Rights Law.
Many people took to social media on Wednesday, appalled at the district's ban.
"This is my school district, and I was there last night," said one Reddit user. "Seeing approximately 500 people out there in support of our LGBTQ+ kids who are loudly denouncing hate, intolerance and the LILM agenda that our BOE had adhered to was incredible."
![](https://patch.com/img/cdn20/users/25459216/20221012/013545/styles/raw/public/processed_images/connetquotsign.jpg)
Several students, such as Eliza, said the lack of support from the district is made up for by their community.
"If you want to scream at us and say that we don't deserve to have that right to love, we're going to scream louder," she said.
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