'We Love You Forever:' Man Killed In Quogue Crash Laid To Rest

QUOGUE, NY — Candles flickered gently on the altar beneath a cross at the Church of Our Savior Lutheran in Manhasset Friday as Ryan James Kiess, 25, one of five killed in a head-on crash in Quogue on July 24, was laid to rest.

At the altar, white roses surrounded a photo of Ryan; the roses might have been wedding flowers, the suit he wears in the photograph that depicts his smiling face might have been worn to a celebration — if only life were different.

If only Nina and Kurt Kiess hadn't lost their beloved son on a curving Quogue road in the dark of night.

According to the Fairchild Funeral Chapel, which posted Ryan's obituary, he lived his entire life in Manhasset, and "loved the Orange & Blue," the school's colors.

He leaves behind his parents, older sister Nicole and younger sister Kimberly, as well as his grandparents and other heartbroken relatives.

"Ryan came into the world as a 9-pound, 4-ounce baby and lived larger than life," his obituary read. "At 6-feet, 3-inches tall, his presence was known due to his height and beautiful smile. He was passionate about family, friends, sports, food, music, travel, and good times, especially at the North Hempstead Country Club. "

A member of the Manhasset High School Class of 2014, Ryan was excelled at lacrosse, football, and ice hockey, where he served as team captain. He volunteered at the Manhasset Lakeville Fire Department Company No. 2 for three years and played the viola for eight years in the school orchestras, the obituary said.

Ryan played Division III lacrosse at the University of Scranton with his cousin Jack; he graduated with a Bachelor of Science in accounting in 2018, followed by his Masters in accountancy the following year.

It was at the University of Scranton where he met Brianna Maglio, 24; the two had been dating for six years. Maglio, the sole survivor of the crash, remains hospitalized in critical condition.

Ryan had just been promoted by KPMG, his family said.

Kurt Kiess thanked the 3,500 that turned out in a huge outpouring of love for his son's services Thursday at the funeral home; interment followed the funeral service Friday at Nassau Knolls Cemetery in Port Washington.

Five men died in the crash on Montauk Highway, police said.

Justin B. Mendez, 22, of Brookhaven, who was driving a red Nissan Maxima and crashed head-on into a gray Toyota Prius on Montauk Highway and Quogue Street (East) died at Stony Brook Southampton Hospital a short time later, police said. The driver of the Prius, Farhan Zahid, 32, of Bay Shore, was an Uber driver, and three passengers, Michael O. Farrell, 20, James P. Farrell, 25, and Kiess, 25, all from Manhassett, died at the scene, police said. Maglio, 24, of Garden City, survived and Kiess said he believes his son and the other young men saved her.

"They are heroes," he said.

As the funeral began on Friday, a sea of young faces marked by unthinkable loss gathered as an organist played "Ave Maria." The sun shone through the blue stained glass mosaic as Ryan's parents and sisters wrapped their arms around one another in grief.

Speaking of her brother, Nicole said it would have been impossible to navigate the pain of the days since her brother's loss without the caring and kind community that embraced them; there are "deep roots of love" connecting them all, she said.

"It's hard to write something like this when you don't have the words," Nicole said. "Even though I am technically his older sister, I always looked up to him figuratively and literally. He towered over me."

She spoke of her brother's zest for life, his love of his friends and food, his bright smile and caring heart. "Ryan had every aspect of his life figured out," she said.

Nicole also spoke about the beautiful bond he shared with Brianna, whom they all call "Bri" and who he called "Bri-Bri."

She and her sister first learned that their brother had a girlfriend on Instagram, Nicole laughed. "We first met Bri at the Belmont Stakes and I remember watching them interacting and thinking, 'They are the loves of each other' lives, even if they don't realize it yet.' The way Ryan's face lit up when he looked at Brianna, and they way Brianna smiled. They were just glowing."

She added: "Our futures revolved around where Ryan and Brianna were going to end up."

Nicole said she'd imagined her future children one day calling him "Uncle Ryan", and envisioned the day when she'd spoil his kids with candy and late-night sleepovers.

"Ryan and Brianna shared something only a few are ever able to experience in a lifetime and we were all able to witness it," Nicole said.

Her brother, she said, was fiercely protective of his sisters. "He was the glue of our family and everything is changed now forever," Nicole said. "Ryan, you've been my best friend since the day you were born."

Nicole remembered going to McDonald's, watching "Tarzan" with her brother, and Ryan sitting in his Subaru with the seat extended all the way back.

"Thank you for taking me to Taco Bell for the first time. Thank you for protecting me and making me laugh — and thank you for saving Bri. I love you more than any words. I wish I could have protected you."

Nicole, her voice breaking, said she longed for just one more bear hug, for one more bright morning of her brother bursting into her room unannounced to wake her up. "Try not to get too rowdy up there and please save us some food," she said, smiling through the tears. "I love you forever, my little brother."

Kurt Kiess also shared vivid memories of his only son. Ryan, he said, loved to tease his sisters. He loved many things — the Suburban, Christmas dinner at Peter Luger, eating at Tony's Di Napoli, the North Hempstead Country Club. He adored travel, fantasy football, Chinese food, the chicken at Dominick's Deli, and music and playlists of all kinds, including disco, oldies, rock and, when he returned from college, country. His son loved sports, including golf, as well as the Jets, the Mets, and the Islanders.

His son, Kurt said, loved his "Manhasset guys," the young men he'd grown up with, and his friends at teammates at the Univesity of Scranton. But more than the sports and the compettion, he said, he loved his teammates.

He excelled on the field, winning two New York State hockey championships and leaving a long legacy in lacrosse. "He was a real celebrator when he won," Kurt said. "But he was not a sore loser."

Kurt added: "He knew how to enjoy life."

All of the friends he'd held so close during his life turned out in force for his funeral, a solid show of support and love, Kurt said.

James Farrell, who also died in the crash with his brother Michael, was known as "King James" to Ryan, his friend from elementary school, the buddy he rode the school bus with.

When he left for college, his son amassed even more loyal friends, Kurt said. "He went as a lacrosse player and came back a loving and caring man," he said.

And at college, there was Brianna, Kurt said. Smiling, he said, he, too, didn't learn about Brianna right away. "He said he was going to Garden City to see a friend. That friend was the love of his life," he said.

His son and Brianna did everything together, Kurt said. "They spent hours, just sitting with each other," he said. There were vacations to St. John, Florida, California, Turks and Caicos. During the pandemic, after her shifts as a nurse, would come over and sleep in Ryan's room, while he was working, he said.

"Brianna loved taking care of Ryan and Ryan loved taking care of Brianna," he said, adding that Ryan loved spending time with Brianna's family.

The couple were talking about rings, had chosen a wedding song, Kurt said. "The world was in front of them. In Brianna's heart and in Ryan's heart, they were married. They weren't married in the law, but in the Lord. Brianna is my daughter."

His son and Brianna had gone to Remsenburg a day before the party to help get the new house ready for the first party held there, Kurt said. "Ryan loved cleaning the pool. If there was a leaf in the pool, Ryan was going to get it," he laughed.

Ryan worked with his mother on the outdoor lights. "Everyhing was perfect," Kurt said.

"It was our first party," Kurt told Patch earlier. "My son was so proud of that house. All of his friends were in the cottage, playing games and dancing," he said. "They helped clean up and then they called an Uber to go dancing. He walked into the living room and got into the car— and that was the last time I saw my son," Kiess said.

He added, "You see these things on the news and you say, 'That's somebody else' — and then it becomes your family."The young people called an Uber to be safe, he said. "They were doing the right thing."

His voice breaking on tears, Kurt said: "We know they saved Bri. They're our heroes. They will all live through Bri forever. That' real love. Not food, or travel. Love is meaningful relationships and sharing mutual emotions," he said.

Kurt asked all in attendance to touch their hearts. "Feel Ryan's love in you. Why does it hurt so much? Because you all love Ryan," he said. "And there's nothing you can do to help Ryan — but we can help Bri. Pray for Bri."

His voice quiet, Kurt said: "Rest in peace, our son. Ryan. We love you forever."

Next, the song "You'll Be In My Heart" played, as Kurt laid his hand on his son' coffin.

Others read a poem, "Remember me," and the 23rd Psalm and a 1 Corinthians 13, a verse about love, was also read.

Rev. Marc Herbst read a reading from the gospel according to Luke, about a widow losing a child.

"We gather here today and know the pain of tragedy. The pain rips us apart," he said.

Of Ryan, he said, "We'd do anyting to see that big smile, that big heart, to hear his playlists," he said.

All who loved him wish he'd made his tee time, scheduled a week before the crash, Rev. Herbst said.

"We'd love to see Ryan rise and root for his beloved 'blue and orange' Islanders, Mets, green Jets. .. and the blue and orange of Manhasset. Ryan, rise so you can tease your sisters and say you're the favorite," he said. All who loved "Ry-guy" yearn for him to be back, a doting grandson and beloved son, he said.

"Jesus wept and he weeps with us today," Rev. Herbst said. He said he would not offer platitudes, say Ryan was in a "better place."

But, he added, "We believe in the resurrection. Young man, I say to you, rise into the everlasting, loving arms of eternal life."

As Kurt said, the pastor added, "It’s the love that we share with one another that helps us through this difficult time."

He added that Ryan, "the ultimate jock, has been sidelined. We have to pull together now." He urged those in the church, "Remember, Number 17 is in the ultimate Hall of Fame, with the love of Jesus Christ."

The pastor also thanked the entire Manhasset community, the fire department and school district, the Nassau Police Department, and even the Americana Manhasset mall, which provided parking, for coming together to lay Ryan to rest.

Investigators believe excessive speed may have been a factor in the crash, police said. Authorities released details on the night of the crash this week, and said Mendez was speeding, had marijuana in his car, and according to witness accounts that have not yet been verified, may have turned off his headlights when police began to follow him.

The Farrell brothers were laid to rest last Friday as hundreds of mourners, many young, turned out in Port Washington for the emotional and heartfelt service.

Kiess said thought should be put into redesigning the roadway where the crash took place. He'd heard that the last time a crash took place at the site was years ago, Kiess said. "That's not something to be proud of," he said. "That's ridiculous. It's a curvy road. It shouldn't be that dangerous. The amount of traffic on Montauk Highway has increased over the years." Officials, he said, "need to be more responsible" and address the situation. "It can't help my son but maybe it can help someone else."

His son and his friends, Kiess said, "were all good kids. They were all at the start of their careers, it was unlimited — they had their whole lives in front of them."

Through tears, Kiess said: "Our hearts are broken forever. Our lives will never be the same. We love our son — and we always will."

The wife of the Uber driver also held a funeral for her husband and sole provider this week; left with three small children, she has commenced fundraising efforts to help them.

Last weekend, Kurt and Nina Kiess went to the spot where their son died, on Montauk Highway in Quogue.

Reflecting on that night, Nina said the "what ifs" swirl in her mind. Seeing the spot for the first time, she said, was "just surreal." She is thankful that her son was home with their family during the past year during the pandemic, for those precious moments. Her son, she said, loved to eat the German food of his family's roots — and that, as well as key lime pie and all his favorites, will be served after his funeral services, she said.

Looking at the flowers and messages, Kurt was filled with emotion. "Heroes lie here," he said. "These four heroes here — these four angels — saved Brianna. We believe that."

Kurt and Nina added: "This should never have happened — and it should never happen again."

"Angels, rest in peace," Nina said.