Hey, you. Super dry skin all of a sudden? Absolutely nothing else has worked? You're covered in cuts from scratching so much? Your legs resemble a wookie's because you can't even shave anymore? You can't imagine ever showing them to another human being ever again? Hello, me-from-three-months-ago!
Buy this and the "Intensive Gel Moussant" body wash from this same brand. Thank me later. Yeah, I know, this isn't as natural of a product as you're used to using, but the EWG Skin Deep database still rates it as only a 2! It's still in the green! Yeah, I know, you hate plastic bottles, but your legs are looking like a biohazard of their own, yo. Yeah, I know, the price is outrageous. So is wearing pants in 115 degree weather to keep people from thinking you have a new plague and chasing you out of town. Yeah, I know, a lot of the reviews say that this cream is hot and sticky and awful and takes forever to dry. Well, they're 100% right. But. IT. WORKS. Just. DO IT. It's even going to clear up the eczema on your wrists from all that excessive hand-washing.
By the way, you should also ditch the razor to really make things shiny. Switch to an electric shaver [Maybe the Panasonic ES-WL60-G?] No, your skin will not be quite as touchably smooth, but there will be MUCH less irritation and it looks the same as if you shaved. Also, you can shave dry, which is pretty cool.