Have you ever been told that you’ve imagined something, or that you’re being over sensitive about an issue that’s important to you? You could be the victim of gaslighting, a particularly cruel form of emotional abuse that makes you question your own reality or memory.
It starts gradually, with the manipulator – a partner, family member, friend or work colleague – slowly brainwashing their victim that they are to blame. It can be subtle, infrequent and even unintentional, spurred on by the gaslighter’s own insecurities – but it can also be extremely damaging. ‘In extreme cases the person on the receiving end will find they lose the facility to trust their own judgement, thoughts, recall or memory,’ warns psychotherapist Cathy Press, author of When Love Bites (£14.99, shop.escapethetrap.co.uk).
It’s also notoriously hard to spot, especially when it’s happening to you. ‘Gaslighting sows the seeds of self-doubt so.