James Hold > Quotes

“A Britisher would say this is jolly exciting."
"What would a German say?" Jo asked.
"I don't know. There's very little excitement in being German.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 14 : The Iron Claw of Destiny, Part 2

“It's been said that life is a series of contradictions. Or, then again, maybe it isn't.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 2 : Chariots of the Texans

“People with "missions" seldom stop to ask if the rest of the world wants to hear about it.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 14 : The Iron Claw of Destiny, Part 2

“According to Mr Walt, there once was a place so utterly desolate, lacking in natural resources, and devoid of charm and beauty that nobody wanted to live there. And because it was such a miserable stink hole, no one bothered to name it. Then one day came a man and wife so utterly down and out that when their wagon broke there was nothing for them to do but stay, like Job on his ash heap, and wait for the end. With nothing to do they established the place as a trash dump, taking refuse from better-off pioneers on their way to greener pastures. In this way they eked a poor but bearable existence. The man's name is not remembered but the woman was called Alice and over time this bleak barren tract of worthless soil became known as the Dump of Alice. Through contraction, it has passed down to us today as Dallas.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 14 : The Iron Claw of Destiny, Part 2

“Evil is by nature fearful and superstitious; therefore it boasts. And thus boasting it succumbs, not to the power of good, but to its own inherent weakness. The premise of evil is a lie that must be compounded to be maintained, until it collapses of its own weight. Hence its downfall, though not immediate, is inevitable. This then is the true power of good: that good need exert so little to flourish, while evil must give all, and still fail.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 4 : Josie and the Alley Cat

“At one point Jo excused herself to go powder her nose, a euphemism since she never wore makeup. Erik bowed as she left the table, then sat back down, not noticing his necktie had draped across his plate. His eyes continued to follow Josie's egress as, taking up knife and fork he went about cutting his necktie into tiny bite-sized slices.
"How's yer steak?" asked J.
"It's a bit stringy," Erik confessed.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 12 : The Iron Claw of Destiny, Part One

“Where are you from?" she asked.
"Houston," I answered proudly, lapsing into my Texan drawl. "A city built of concrete an' guts."
"It sounds interesting."
"It is," I admitted, "only ya gotta be careful where ya step.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 12 : The Iron Claw of Destiny, Part One

“When the evening meal was delivered to his cell, Aft Agley overpowered the turnkey and eluded his captors by hijacking a pastry delivery vehicle. It was a perfect escape as no cop wanted to be seen chasing after a donut truck.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 7 : Back to Square One

“They spotted the Turkey God immediately, which wasn't hard to do as he had not changed a bit since being thawed him from his icy prison in "Chariots of the Texans". He stood six-feet-seven-inches tall and had a long, hooked nose. It wasn't just a long nose; it was an enormous nose, magnificent in splendor. Indeed it was the focal point of his being. The impressive height, the lanky build, the long face with whiskered chin did nothing to distract from it. Nor did the burning eyes and long red hair, which, when loosened from its ponytail and fell forward to cover his face. Even then his humongous honker stood out like Mount Everest. It was as though his entire existence was summed up in that sacred snoot and the rest of his body had been created for no other purpose than to support the majestic beak. It was his statement of purpose, his declaration to the world, and his seal of authority. It was without a doubt the nose of a god.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 12 : The Iron Claw of Destiny, Part One

“It's like the Bible says: The last shall be first and the first shall be last, and the rest will be stuck in the middle."

-- James Hold, Out of Texas 1 : The Gaunt-Faced Grappler”
― James Hold

“It's like the Bible says: The last shall be first and the first shall be last, and the rest will be stuck in the middle.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 1: The Gaunt-Faced Grappler

“They spotted the Turkey God immediately, which wasn't hard to do as he had not changed a bit since being thawed from his icy prison in "Chariots of the Texans". He stood six-feet-seven-inches tall and had a long, hooked nose. It wasn't just a long nose; it was an enormous nose, magnificent in splendor. Indeed it was the focal point of his being. The impressive height, the lanky build, the long face with whiskered chin did nothing to distract from it. Nor did the burning eyes and long red hair, which, when loosened from its ponytail and fell forward to cover his face. Even then his humongous honker stood out like Mount Everest. It was as though his entire existence was summed up in that sacred snoot and the rest of his body had been created for no other purpose than to support the majestic beak. It was his statement of purpose, his declaration to the world, and his seal of authority. It was without a doubt the nose of a god.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 12 : The Iron Claw of Destiny, Part One

“Yes, I do,” Raas answered. “I wonder if she could have been a regurgitating medium.”
“What’s that?” asked Mel.
“I saw a Pauly Shore movie once,” J offered.
.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 3 : Remember the Aloe, Moe

“And who's to say she wasn't right? After all, love is the most powerful thing in the universe; the determining factor in one's dealings on earth. Though challenged, it has never been conquered; though questioned, it has never been quieted; and though tested, it has never been stilled. Love can build up or it can tear down; make life totally fulfilling, or destroy it completely. It can alter the past, enrich the present, and change the future. With it one can face anything. Without it a person will turn his back on everything. In the presence of love all sins fade; while in its absence they magnify, stark and vivid, in all their ugliness. Yes, love can hurt, scar, and wound; but it can also heal, repair, and bind. It can open one's eyes to reality, or it can blind them completely. True love has no illusions. It sees things in a clear light and accepts them anyway. In the end, it all comes down to choice. And the only pain is when it is not returned. And the only crime is when one is blind to its offering.
Only what did he know? He was, after all, just a cat.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 4: Josie and the Alley Cat

“Th' only thing I know fer certain is ya never say 'Yes' to a Frenchman under hypnosis.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 8 : Destroy All Wrestlers

“You see, Erik," said Raas as he poured another cup of coffee, "it's not fair to accuse religion of being a crutch because that's precisely what it is. And no true religion would claim to be anything else. After all, what is a crutch but something that helps you through a rough time and lends support and comfort in time of need?”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 12 : The Iron Claw of Destiny, Part One

“Darkness hung over the bayou like a fat man on a barstool, taking up all available space and then some.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 9 : Have Ring Will Grapple

“Well, sir," Mr Braynes took a deep breath, "the truth is I do have a strange and wondrous tale to relate; a tale for which the ending has yet to be written."
"You mean Hold's making this up as he goes?"
"Who?"
"Never mind. Please, go on.”
― James Hold, In the Footsteps of Cthulhu

“The Ultra-Super-Gala-Mega-Mall 97-Screen Cinema was showing Beach Blanket Prophecy in which, according to reviews: "A bump on the head as a result of a surfing accident gives Frankie’s girlfriend the ability to see into the future, making it the only film in the beach party series to turn Annette prophet. ...”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 12 : The Iron Claw of Destiny, Part One

“I see you like animals," Marlena commented.
"Yeah," he answered back. "I'm a regular Francis of Isuzu.”
― James Hold, In the Footsteps of Cthulhu

“...a woman so attractive men did not even bother to mentally undress her. She was that beautiful, just the way she was.”
― James Hold, Out of Texas 9 : Have Ring Will Grapple