Eisner Award Nomination: Best Publication for Teens
"A beautiful, courageous book.” Gene Luen Yang, author of American Born Chinese
Monstrous is poignant young adult graphic memoir about a Korean-American girl who uses fandom and art-making to overcome racist bullying. Perfect for fans of Almost American Girl!
Sarah has always struggled to fit in. Born in South Korea and adopted at birth by a white couple, she grows up in a rural community with few Asian neighbors. People whisper in the supermarket. Classmates bully her. She has trouble containing her anger in these moments―but through it all, she has her art. She's always been a compulsive drawer, and when she discovers anime, her hobby becomes an obsession.
Though drawing and cosplay offer her an escape, she still struggles to connect with others. And in high school, the bullies are louder and meaner. Sarah's bubbling rage is threatening to burst.
Well, well. My fellow drinker of the haterade knows me best. If you had asked me a year ago, I would've pleasantly told you that I don't read graphic novels and probably rolled my eyes to myself. This May, while attending a plethora of AAPI book launches, I stumbled upon an event for Deb JJ Lee and Victoria Ying. Lo and behold, I loved both of their graphic novels, and this one as well. So perhaps I wasn't having trouble with the medium, and only the subject matter that wasn't relevant to me. That's not to say I don't like branching out. I do. I did. I'm here.
When I first looked at this cover, I didn't know what to expect. I went in blind, which I rarely do. I fell in love. This story is about an adopted Korean American girl growing up in a rural community. Her sister is also adopted from South Korea, but they're not related by blood. After reading the author's note, I realized this was semi autobiographical. This isn't just a story about racism. It's also about queer identity. To be a minority in multiple facets of your life is obviously a very difficult thing to go through. To do it while hormones are raging through your teenage body is even harder. Hands down, one of my favorite reads this year.
This is a visceral graphic memoir about growing up as a nerdy, queer, gender-conconforming transracial adoptee in middle America. It deals with bullying, mental health, anti-Asian racism, feeling like you don't fit, and not having the language to understand your own identity. The art does a wonderful job of showing the difference between Sarah's internal and external life as a child and adolescent. I think this is incredibly effective and would be an excellent book to hand to teenagers who might also struggle to see where they fit. I found it to be insightful, riveting, and sometimes relatable. The content isn't always easy to read but it's an excellent book. I received a copy of this book for review via NetGalley, all opinions are my own.
Note that there is use of slurs, including things that were used casually in the 90's like r***rd and "gay" as derogatory, in addition to a lot of anti-asian slurs.
Wow! I loved this! Honestly I didn't think I'd like this graphic memoir at first because it started out pretty slow. But I kept on reading and I'm so glad I did! At this point, if I can get auto-approved for arcs from First Second Books, I'd be so honored and happy. I've only read two graphic novels from them but so far the quality has been amazing.
Monstrous is about a transracial adoptee named Sarah who's from Korea but was adopted by white parents from the US. Their life growing up in a rural area near Baltimore comes with a lot of racism and bigotry. They develop unhealthy coping habits to deal with these issues, along with the many other issues that teenagers who are different face from their peers, such as being LGBTQ, neurodiverse, etc.
This is a book for people who never belonged to the norm. In Sarah, I found a kindred spirit. They love manga and anime and expressing themself through male gendered clothing, which makes them stick out like a sore thumb in their rural K-12 schools. I could relate to the anger and monster growing inside them that they visualize and anthromorphize whenever bullies torment them. At the end, they realize that it's very unhealthy but then again, growing up in the late 90s and early 00s, mental health wasn't something kids and teens talked about openly and instead, these topics were usually mocked at. I'm just glad that it's becoming less stigmatized in today's world. Gen Z gives me hope honestly.
Anyway, I love that the author/illustrator was very open with their experiences. I think this graphic memoir would really help teens today who are going through the same issues. It's a lovely feeling to know that you're not alone.
Thank you to First Second Books and NetGalley for this arc.
This is the memoir of a Korean-American girl born in South Korea and adopted at birth by a white couple, who struggled greatly as a child due to racist bullying, identity crisis, and mental health issues in a rural community. Aside from that, she did not fit accepted gender stereotypes. Although Sarah seeks solace in the magical worlds of drawing, anime, and manga, others use them to exclude and bully her.
I wasn't particularly taken with the artist's drawings. My favorite part of the book was the author's personal story and how she conveyed it. What the artist went through was harrowing, but she articulately analyzed everything. I believe this book will benefit a large number of people. When I was younger, I had somewhat similar issues, though not as severe as Sarah's. I was also obsessed with Sailor Moon. I would have appreciated reading similar stories and possibly having the courage to ask for help.
I was pleased to see at the end of the book that the author provided information about online communities where people experiencing similar difficulties could seek assistance. It's a very thoughtful gesture.
Many thanks to NetGalley and First Second Books, First Second for providing ARC of this graphic novel for reviewers.
This is one of those books that makes you cry, the pain is so real, and so hard to take. The bullying that Sarah goes through in school, and in life, is horrific, and she reaches breaking points when she launches out, which is to be understood.
The story is that Sarah is adopted from South Korea by white couple, who try their best to make her feel she is part of their family, since she is. There is even a point where she has to go to an International festival that the girl scouts are putting on, so she dresses like the German background that her parents are from. And of course she is teased about that, because that isn’t Asian.
The two things that give her happiness are drawing anime and manga, and going to conventions. There she can be who she wants to be. She loves to Cosplay.
The really hard part for me was when the school decided to just ignore obvious bullying and racism. They just didn’t want to admit that it was happening.
Really well done, to get that deep into her history, and her story, and present it with all the horror that it was. Sometimes writing things like this is cathartic, and I hope the author felt that way, and from her notes at the end, it sounds as though she is in a much better space now, twenty years on.
Thanks to Netgalley for making this book available for an honest review.
Monstrous follows Sarah, a Korean-American girl adopted by white parents and raised in a rural community. As they grow up facing racism, bullying, and confusion over their queerness, Sarah is forced to confront their own inner demons in order to accept the life they were given.
I'm as white as they come, but I still felt myself relating to Sarah's childhood. I was also known as the "weird girl" in my circles, and accepting yourself as you are is a vital stepping stone in growing up. The way Sarah embraced their identity via the narrative of anime near the end of the book brought me to tears. I loved their art style very much, too.
Fantastic art with a solid complete early autobiography of the author. Sarah was Asian-American in a very white school that saw bullying CONSTANTLY. She was adopted also, so explaining her parents got to be a thorn too. Add another adopted South Korean sister (not biologically related, and VERY different than Sarah), and you've got even MORE anxiety. Sarah loves art in a school that does not appreciate her talents. While she gets words thrown at her, she grew up with a rather defensive attitude herself (that she admits). Sarah also likes wearing guy-clothes vs dresses.
While the book is good at exposing all these issues, it might actually be a bit tough for the younger audience to absorb since so much of the book has this negative/bullying tone. It might vindicate teens with similar feelings, but I think they need a better ending than this quick nebulous off-to-college seen here.
5* art and conveyance of an autobiography but need to dock a star for the grittiness of the reality conveyed in the story for the intended teen audience. I'm not so sure the kids that identify with Sarah will feel much better upon finishing this book.
Note: this book might be GREAT for teachers to read for in-service work. This exposes all the crap that goes on in the halls, and pre/post school, or in the cafeteria. Teachers are overworked and don't have time to patrol the halls correctly - but schools need to cover these areas better.
I picked this book because it combined two of my favorite genres – graphic novels and memoirs – and I made the perfect choice. This isn’t a novel or a book it’s a genuine and heartfelt outpour of what goes through a mind of a person who is made different by other people because of how they look or due to the choices they make. It is the growing-up saga of Sarah, who was born to Korean parents, but was adopted by American parents and grew up in a small American town full of prejudices and biases. The story is heart-wrenching. Her feelings and expressions are so real. Her anger, frustration and the slow building of a negative mindset in her is illustrated brilliantly. The graphics are detailed, intimate and feel so real. I’ve read at least a few dozen graphic novels in my reading life but never have I encountered such detailed, and perfect facial expressions through the eyes, the face, and the overall body language. This book is an upcoming release, and I have no clue how it will do once it is in print form. But in any case, I will recommend this book to anyone and everyone looking to understand the perspective of a person who is different or even to readers who want to know what a brilliant graphics novel looks like. This novel is bound to be the next in line with Maus and Persepolis. Fingers crossed.
(Full disclosure: I received a free e-book for review through Netgalley. Trigger warning for depictions of racism, homophobia, ableism, and bullying.)
At the time of this writing, we're only 49 days into the year, and I've been lucky enough to discover more favorite reads in this month and a half than in all of 2022. The streak continues with MONSTROUS: A TRANSRACIAL ADOPTION STORY, which is #9!
Comic book artist Sarah Myer (they/them) was born in South Korea and adopted by a white couple living in rural Maryland. Growing up in a conservative small town was hard enough as a non-white kid in a blended adoptive family - Sarah and their older sister Lizzie were two of just a handful of Asian kids in their school - but Sarah was different in other ways as well, even if it took them a while to fully understand and articulate the differences. In the interim, Sarah used the language they were most well-versed in to understand their un-belonging: "Monsters, aliens, mermaids, and mutants seemed like a good fit."
From a young age, Sarah was plagued by insecurity, low self-esteem, anxiety, fits of rage and violence, and vivid nightmares (particularly concerning the inner workings of the human body - a problem that was only exacerbated by their mother's breast cancer diagnosis). They excelled at art, especially drawing, and a childhood viewing of THE LITTLE MERMAID led to an obsession with mermaids - and a realization that their passion could one day sustain a career.
As Sarah got older, their "otherness" only grew, as did the bullying: racist, sexist, ableist, homophobic, and otherwise. Their interest in cartoons evolved into an obsession with SAILOR MOON and anime - years, if not decades, before anime became mainstream. As their hormone-addled classmates became fixated on the opposite sex (heteronormativity being the rule; a scene wherein the "gifted and talented" class discusses Mathew Shepard's murder is downright horrifying), Sarah remained mostly oblivious ... until developing a crush on Iris, a fellow theater geek. They often cosplayed as male characters as a pretext to dress how they wanted; as a way of expressing their queerness; or as a sort of armor against the outside world: "If I was in a costume, though, I felt safe. I was someone else." Sarah's small stature collided with stereotypes about "meek Asian women" and her supposedly "childish" interest in cartoons to further alienate them from their peers.
Perhaps this is why they were rarely punished (or received help) for their violent outbursts. Sarah depicts four instances where they lashed out physically against racist bullies. While it's hard not to cheer Sarah on (particularly when defending against physical harm; dad says what we're all thinking), their uncontrolled (or untreated) anger is clearly a problem. Sarah likens their anger to a monster: one that was self-created - and, thus, must also be self-conquered. Although, to be honest, this comparison seems unfair: the racist/sexist/ableist/homophobic bullies, who were tolerated/encouraged by the school administration, are at least equally at fault.
Sarah found bright spots where they could: art was a refuge, especially in the form of the after school GT Art Club, and they also discovered an affinity for acting when they land the part of Gavroche in LES MISERABLES. And, of course, as an adult Sarah is doing exactly what they dreamed of: writing, drawing, and teaching art.
While MONSTROUS is at its core a story about the author's experience as transracial adoptee, it's also highly relatable to anyone who's ever felt different, alien, or like an outsider. Monstrous. I use the word "compelling" a lot - maybe too much - but hey, if it fits (*shrug*). MONSTROUS isn't just a coming-of-age story, but perhaps one of the most evocative ones I've read. A graphic novel is the perfect medium for Sarah's storytelling, allowing them to give complex feelings physical form. And the artwork is simply marvelous: equal parts beautiful and grotesque, often simultaneously.
This may very well be the most important graphic novel to come out this year for middle school and up.
The honesty coupled with the portrayal of an unflinching journey of trying to survive despite the racism, homophobia, and constant microaggressions from others where you are supposed to be safe grips you.
Sarah's story is not heoric in the sense of someone trying to be something bigger than they are, instead it is life in the smallest details. Of what it took to grow up in the 1990's America (with so many parallels to today) when others decided that you were not right.
This memoir is about rising from an early age, and constantly finding strength in art, and later the world of anime, manga, and cosplay all while being told that you were never the right kind of person to be accepted by classmates and people in power. And yet you survived, you made sense of the world on your own terms.
While this graphic memoir does not come out until June, I have a feeling it is going to compared to the likes of New Kid, Hey Kiddo, and all of the incredible other graphic novels where so many kids have been able to find themselves. I know I saw my oldest in its pages and will be purchasing this memoir for them as a way to say, "See you are not alone, you will find your space too, and we love you just the way you are despite what the world may try to make you believe."
What courage and strength it must have taken to put all of this into the world. I am so grateful because this book will save lives.
So pre-order it now. Plan for it in your book clubs and lit circles. Make space for the kids who connect with it in any way. Sit down with it yourself and give it the attention it deserves. Thank you for the preview copy
This graphic novel memoir was a hard but important read. Sarah was adopted from Korea by white parents and this is her experience growing up in the 90s and early 2000s. The author did not shy away from the racism she faced and the impact it had. We have come a long way since then but still have a ways to go. Thanks to Netgalley and the publisher for the digital ARC.
what a slay. also I really am a sucker for books that explicitly use other media for characters (or in this case for the author themself) to process things. representation mattersssss
I received this book from Netgalley/the publisher in exchange of an honest review.
Yes, the gods have blessed me! I was allowed to read a new First Second book! offers some chocolate as gratitude.
This was an amazing graphic novel about growing up, anxiety, mental health, adoption, racism (I wanted to yeet people so damn hard), figuring out identity, being queer, and much more. We see our MC from when she was tiny to adult. You really see her grow up.
I loved her parents, who were supportive and were there for her (I loved how her mom was all kind and trying to help her and her father just says this at one point when talking with her about school: That racist little fucker, I just snorted, I am sorry, but go dad). I loved how they talked to her, gave her advice, helped her in any way they could, and more.
My heart broke so many times and I cried a few times.
The art was really good and I love the style, especially when she showed her inner feelings, monsters and scary things. I could really relate. Also with being boisterous and loud and over the top to hide feelings/not sure how to express your feelings.
I loved that she loves anime. From Sailor Moon to Pokemon to Evangelion (well, OK, this one I still need to watch after being an anime fan for years, but I am just not that big on mecha and I heard stories about the story so I will really need to find a moment that I am well enough to watch). I loved that she kept on watching and drawing despite everything. And that she was able to go to cons.
I would highly recommend this book, but be sure to bring tissues. You will need them.
Thank you to Netgalley, the publisher of Macmillan, and the author Sarah Myer. Myer's YA graphic memoir reminded me of how my childhood and how my understanding of being Asian American relied on proximity to other Asian cultures and signifiers such as anime. Myer's memoir reminded me how Asian Americans weren't that visible in the mainstream or weren't known to be creating media as it is today. Myer's memoir shows how transracial adoption can be embodied within oneself and how it can differentiate between siblings as well. While Myer's style could be improving, her storytelling skills really come throughout the work.
An intense read. A memoir of a transracial adoption. The story of a girl who is overflowing with creativity in a world that can't accept differences. Sarah Myer ultimately comes to terms with her inner woundedness and learns to love herself.
4.5 stars--This arresting graphic memoir drew me in quickly, and I was surprised by how much I enjoyed and engaged with it.
Monstrous is the story of Sarah, a Korean-American adoptee growing up in rural, mostly-white middle America in the ‘80s, ‘90s, and early 2000s. Nearly every aspect of Sarah’s identity diverges from what is expected as the norm in the cloistered community—heritage, interests, personal style, and sexuality. And in this part of the world in this time period, differences equal bullying, racism, and exclusion—by not only other kids, but even some adults.
While remaining true to Sarah’s experiences in particular, the themes explored will be relatable to anyone who felt unmoored and excluded growing up. As the text put it, The culture of the school and area was so insular that it was tantamount to social suicide to be “different” in any way. Small town and rural America is not kind to its young people who do not toe a very narrow line regarding how one is supposed to look, act, live, and believe.
I was agreeing wholeheartedly when I read, Sometimes people don’t realize how backward things were, even in the late ‘90s. I’m older than the author, but their recounting of the heartless, mocking attitudes shown by the students when their 7th grade teacher attempted to discuss Matthew Shepard’s hate-driven murder brought back memories of similar comments on the same topic among my high school peers at the time.
Myer’s illustrations are excellent; emotive and detailed, and show a keen eye for culture and clothing styles of the ‘80s and early ‘90s in particular. Although the ending wrapped up a little too quickly and tidily, I get it—the point is to give young people who may also be in a difficult spot hope for the future along with advice for coping and thriving in their present situation, even if it isn’t ideal.
Thanks to First Second Books for giving me the ARC of this graphic novel through Netgalley in exchange of a honest review.
Monstrous is the second graphic novel i read about the experiences of a korean-american girl growing up in the 90's early 2000's. In this case we have Sarah, born in South Korea, adopted at birth by a white couple with german roots. She and her sister, another adopted korean girl, grow in a rural community were kids like them are seldom seen; This makes it hard for Sarah to feel like she fits with the other kids, whereas her sister seems to have no problem mingling.
As someone who showed creative proclivities as soon as i managed to hold a pencil, i related earnestly with her obsession with drawing, and how she used her abilities to try to connect with other kids or to cope with her issues. Also the portrayal of her violent outbursts product of the bullying she received from some cruel kids and how she interpreded those as 'having a monstrous nature' was interesting and made me think of how little portrayals of this type of defense mechanism bullied kids create are out there, especially with girls.
Her experiences discovering anime and the conventions was delightful, although i wasn't much of a weeb when i was a teen, reading these chapters reminded me of the first time i went to the local con and how in awe i was of the cosplayers, the merch, the dance competitions, etc. and my parents being thrilled about these weirdos with colorful wigs, haha.
Overall i found this autobiography very honest in nature and i bet it was cathartic for the author to relive their experiences for they weren't easy, there's some parts that are quite upsetting, sad, but then there's light at the end and i'm glad for that. For some (i bet most) the teenage years are far from the best years of their life.
Disclaimer: I was given an advanced copy for reviewing purposes from NetGalley. Thanks NetGalley!
This story honestly blew me away. As someone who grew up not knowing their birth father, I could relate to a lot of this story regarding a young girl's journey making sense of her adoption. I loved the fandom elements, and especially everything regarding Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles and Sailor Moon, which are two series which shaped me immensely! The art and writing are exquisite, I cannot recommend this story enough and hope that everyone feels the way I do about it when it is fully released to the public!
Viscerally powerful. A deeply painful story told with clarity and hope, drawn vibrantly. I ached reading this, as another person who turned their (in my case mostly queer stuff) confusion on themself. I truly appreciate this story being shared.
Special thanks to FierceReads and NetGalley for an eARC of this book! All thoughts and opinions reflected in this review are my own.
I don’t rate memoirs. To me, there is something deeply uncomfortable about assigning a numerical value to a book that someone wrote about themself, their life, their experiences. Who am I to judge what they went through or how they chose to portray it? Sure I could get nitpicky on sentence structure and writing craft or in this case illustration, but a book is more than that, so I simply give memoirs no rating at all. I think this was an impactful, important book. I think it’s going to mean so much to so many people, and I am so glad that it exists. I’m glad I read it, though it made me feel ill to read about some of the things that the author experienced. I was a little uncomfortable with how many slurs were used, repeatedly. I understand that this is a memoir, set in the 90s, and these things were really said to the author, but I’m not sure how I feel about them repeating them directly, even if it was condemned in text. Many of these slurs were not this author’s to reclaim. The use of slurs is complicated, and I understand the point that they were trying to make, and I’m not even sure it was wrong of them to use these slurs in their memoir. I’m kind of confused on what the “right thing” is when it comes to that sort of thing, if there is one at all, but I did think it important to just, point out, especially since slurs can be very triggering to read, and basically every slur you can think of (except the N word) is used in this book, including ones I’ve never even heard of before. That said, I do recommend this book. I think everyone should read it, if they are in a place to do so.
I had a bit of trouble getting into this memoir at first, but the story and the author surely got to me in the second part of this graphic novel.
A very raw and eye-opening retell of Sarah's experiences as a Korean adoptee in the less inclusive America of the 90's and 2000's, this is also a very poignant and accurate portrait of bullying and teenage struggles when it comes to identity... in a lot of different ways.
And, also, proof that art can be a saving line when dealing with mental health issues, or just 'simple' life.
Monstrous centers around Sarah, a Korean American adoptee growing up in the late ‘80s and 90s. She often feels othered for looking different than her peers enduring racism, harassment, and bullying that is not addressed by the adults in her life minus her parents telling her it’s wrong. Her love of anime makes her a target of bullying as well- it’s what I most connected with as a fellow Moonie in the late 90s/ early 2000s. Powerful and wonderfully drawn.
Sarah on adoptoitu Etelä-Koreasta. Hän ei tiedä biologisista vanhemmistaan mitään. Hän asuu adoptiovanhempiensa ja isosiskonsa kanssa maaseudulla ja käy koulua, jossa hän käytännössä yksin edustaa ei-valkoihoisia vähemmistöjä. Käytävillä huudellaan rasistisia kommentteja, eikä koulun henkilökunta puutu asiaan. Onneksi hänellä on intohimonsa sarjakuviin ja animeen, koska ilman niitä hänen sisäisen hirviönsä söisi hänet hengiltä.
I haven’t read a graphic novel in a few years, so picking this one up felt almost nostalgic, especially with this art style. I felt comforted and seen in a unique way when reading this. I really enjoyed how the graphics and illustrations intertwined with the storyline and how the author was feeling at the specific page. I also appreciated the truthful topics the author talks about explicitly. I found myself relating to the author a lot more than I initially expected; from her childhood to the later years of highschool, I saw myself in her in a lot of aspects. Time went by fast when reading this, so when she showed graphics of her younger self from earlier in the book, I was surprised I hadn’t realized how much of her life I’ve just read about. I loved the ending and thought it was inspirational, and I also loved how she sprinkled parts of her younger self in the later parts.
PS her dad taking interest in her hobbies and passion and participating in them with her warmed my heart.
At first, I really liked how the narrator is "adult Sarah" reflecting on and explaining their experiences, but by the end it felt a little too much like therapy-speak. Even so, it's a beautiful graphic novel with a lot of depth.
I loved this memoir, though parts of it were heartbreaking to read. No one should be treated the way the author was. The descriptions of early childhood and particularly the difficulty of telling the difference between anxiety and having a wild imagination made so much sense to me. I think back in the 80s and 90s in particular, we didn’t talk about fear and worry in terms of mental health. It was viewed more as personal quirkiness maybe? I definitely grew up thinking that a lot of my own struggles with anxiety were simply my overactive imagination. So reading about Sarah’s experience with that was both sad and very validating.
I think what’s truly brilliant about this book is the way that Myer uses concrete visual storytelling to tell the story of a really abstract idea. Because ultimately what the book is about is the journey Sarah takes to learn self-love and peace. I love that art is such a huge part of that story– the fact that the artist is telling their own story through art adds a whole extra layer to the message, too. Because not only has Sarah learned self-love through art, they’ve also found a way to use art to share their story and welcome others into an exploration of self-love, too.
I also love the relationships in the book and the way that each character in Sarah’s family isn’t perfect, but it’s clear that there’s love between them.
This is a great book for anyone struggling with anger, anxiety, or bullying.
Note: I received a free copy of this book in exchange for my honest review. All opinions my own.
Disclaimer:I received a copy of this book through NetGalley, in exchange for an honest review.
As usual, hard to put a rating on a memoir, as it's always a very personal story for the author to share. This one is very intense in its storytelling. There is a lot packed in there: bullying, racism, interracial adoption, queerness, anger issues... and I probably forget some. Add to it all the feelings involved with dealing with those issues... as I said it's a lot. Yet, I felt like Sarah Myer did a good job with the narration. They never made themselves the flawless victim but also talked about the unlikeable parts of their attitude/personality toward others. They also explain how their love for anime and drawing helped them cope through all those bad times and how they also had supportive people in their life (including their parents) even when they didn't always saw it.
I wasn't the biggest fan of the graphic style but it's in no way bad, it just didn't resonate much with me, but the story was worth the read anyway. I'd recommend this book to pretty much anyone but I think it can have a stronger impact on teens and pre-teens who are struggling with any sort of exclusion.