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Drink, Slay, Love

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Pearl is a sixteen-year-old vampire... fond of blood, allergic to sunlight, and mostly evil... until the night a sparkly unicorn stabs her through the heart with his horn. Oops.

Her family thinks she was attacked by a vampire hunter (because, obviously, unicorns don't exist), and they're shocked she survived. They're even more shocked when Pearl discovers she can now withstand the sun. But they quickly find a way to make use of her new talent. The Vampire King of New England has chosen Pearl's family to host his feast. If Pearl enrolls in high school, she can make lots of human friends and lure them to the King's feast—as the entrees.

The only problem? Pearl's starting to feel the twinges of a conscience. How can she serve up her new friends—especially the cute guy who makes her fangs ache—to be slaughtered? Then again, she's definitely dead if she lets down her family. What's a sunlight-loving vamp to do?

386 pages, Hardcover

First published September 13, 2011

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About the author

Sarah Beth Durst

38 books3,220 followers
Sarah Beth Durst is the New York Times bestselling author of over twenty-five books for adults, teens, and kids, including cozy fantasy The Spellshop. She's been awarded an American Library Association Alex Award, as well as a Mythopoeic Fantasy Award. Several of her books have been optioned for film/television, including Drink Slay Love, which was made into a TV movie and was a question on Jeopardy! She lives in Stony Brook, New York, with her husband, her children, and her ill-mannered cat. Visit her at sarahbethdurst.com.

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Displaying 1 - 30 of 965 reviews
May 26, 2014
Actual rating: 4.5 stars and a unicorn.
“Kind of funny when you think about it, us believing we had to protect a dude from you,” Tall said. “In a few weeks we can all grab a cheeseburger together and laugh about this. A hot chick like you couldn’t possibly be a vampire. Seriously, though, you might want to cut down on the black garb.”

“Not that you were in any way ‘asking for it,’” Tall said. “A woman can wear whatever she chooses without fear of being mistaken for a fiendish bloodsucking nightwalker. But have you thought green? Green would look great with your eyes.”
Any book with a stalker unicorn and an alpha-female vampire with a sadistic streak is bound to be a fucking winner. This book is fa-bu-lous. *snaps fingers*

It's got:

- A motherfucking sparkly twinkly stabbing stalker unicorn, HELLO?!

- A strong female vampire lead who slowly discovers her humanity (who's a master at power plays)

- A Mafia-like vampiric society

- A sweet love interest who's a decent human being, and a love triangle that doesn't hurt because it's not really much of one

- A hilarious portrayal of high school that points out the clichés within the cliques

- A tongue-in-cheek style of writing, chock full of deadpan humor (no pun intended)

- Actual female friendship! Hallelujah!

The Summary:
The unicorn stood between the dumpsters. He sparkled like a horse-shaped disco ball. His traditional spiral horn beamed like a toy light saber.

Pearl burst out laughing. “Seriously? A unicorn? Please.”

“Why are you here? Are you dumpster diving?” Pearl asked. “I can see how the horn would be useful in sorting through trash. But is that really appropriate behavior for a mythical creature? Shouldn’t you be eating honey and sunshine?”
Pearl is a vampire. She is merciless (and in The Family, she's got to be). She drinks blood, she's even got a favorite drink. His name's Brad. He works at the ice cream shop. He tastes best after he's had mint-flavored ice cream.
“Shh,” she said. “Nearly dawn. No time for talking.” Snuggling against him, she continued to feed him ice cream. He swallowed mechanically, as if her proximity erased all brain function. Pearl pressed closer and pushed his straggly hair back away from his neck.
And then she extended her fangs and sank them into his jugular.
But all that was before she got stabbed by an unicorn. A motherfucking unicorn. They're not supposed to even exist! Naturally, nobody believes her. Her family (The Family) just laughs at her. Pearl's Family is like a vampire Mafia. Her mother is cold (as well as cold-blooded). Her father is a "businessman." But all in all, it's a fairly normal family...just a little deadlier than most. She's got a fussy aunt. She's got an idiot cousin. She's got a crazy uncle.
...his propensity to chew off birds’ heads was much more unsettling than the puckering on his cheeks.
But the family has more to worry about that the possible sighting of an unicorn, the King of the vampires is coming to town, and her family is their host. So yeah, bigger things to worry about here.

But then, weird things start happening...Pearl starts feeling empathy for her food (aka Brad the ice cream boy).
I should release him, she thought. Let the puppy run free.
Pearl shook her head. Where on earth had that thought come from? He wasn’t a puppy; he was a walking Happy Meal. Had she really just worried about how her snack felt? Seriously?
She sees her own reflection---and my fucking god...she can step into the sun without dying in a blaze of fire.
Colored light tinted her pale skin, and Pearl raised her arm and turned it over to watch the stained-glass light dance over her blue veins and bring hints of color into the whiteness, as if her skin were Formica.
Well, look at that, she thought. I’m a sparkly vampire.
The Family isn't too happy to find out about this, but there's the problem with The King coming to town. They have to provide the entertainment. They have to provide the food (aka HUMANS OM NOM NOM). And now their daughter, Pearl, can step into sunlight and not die a fiery death. Hm. HMMMMMMMMMMM. This may be useful.
“You want me to find the king’s dinner in daylight?” Pearl guessed.
“Precisely,” Mother said.
Daddy smiled. “We want you to attend high school.”
Because there's nothing more delicious than a schoolful of teenagers ^_^

So Pearl's going to go to high school for the first time in her life, huzzah! She already knows a couple of kids, too, there's sweet, friendly Bethany, and super nice guy with a hero complex, Evan.
He’d chosen a chair by the window. Sunlight streamed in, illuminating the dust to create distinct rays so it appeared as if he were highlighted by a halo of angelic light. If he’d been trying to stage it to catch her eye, he couldn’t have planned it better.
The school is...interesting, and for a vampire used to dominance and power play within the vampiric hierarchy...it's a piece of cake. There's your usual cliques, there's the Queen Bee...of whom Pearl isn't the least bit scared.
She watched as Ashlyn strode across the cafetorium with all the confidence of a vampire...and Pearl wondered if that was it, if it was the confidence that she radiated that was the source of her power.
If that’s all it takes, Pearl thought, then I’m going to rule this place.
Pearl is fucking awesome. She's got the strength. She's got the looks. She's got the swagger. She's got the confidence. Within the first day, she's insulted and upstaged an aggressive teacher, she's scratched Queen Bee's car, and Greenbridge High School doesn't know what hit it.
“Are you kidding?” Bethany said. “She’s, like, a hero!” With shining eyes, she turned to Pearl. “You are exactly what this school needs.”
“How convenient,” Pearl said, “since this school is exactly what I need.”
Everything would be perfect if she's starting to...feel things for the pesky fucking humans. Everything would be perfect if she weren't so busy that she doesn't have time to eat (drink, rather), or sleep. Everything would be perfect if SHE WEREN'T BEING STALKED BY A FUCKING UNICORN.
As the sun sank into the horizon, Pearl trudged home without having seen a single sparkly hoofprint or rainbowed poop pile. It wasn’t as if she’d expected unicorn wuz here graffiti...Okay, yes, that would have been nice.
Pearl's hunger soon gets the better of her...and in the midst of gaining control, Pearl makes a mistake. And now, it seems like her meals---aka, her human friends---are the only ones to whom she can turn.
Hating herself for what she was about to say, Pearl blurted out the words: “I need help.”
So softly that Pearl was certain she wasn’t meant to hear it, Evan whispered, “And lo, Hell freezes over.”
In the end, who will Pearl become? The bloodsucking, cold-hearted creature of vampire lore...or someone who's only too human?
She swallowed hard and tried to force the achy feeling to stop. No matter how lovely the words were, these people didn’t understand, and she couldn’t stay.
Staying could destroy her more thoroughly than a stake through the heart ever could.
The Setting:
Upstairs was the perfect suburban home: couches and TV in the living room, marble counters and stainless steel appliances in the kitchen, and color-coordinated lacy bedrooms. Downstairs, hidden from human view, was a catacomb of tunnels and rooms that included sleeping chambers, training rooms, torture rooms, a few storage areas, and the treasury.
This is a modern US setting in which vampires exist unbeknownst to humans (and so do other supernatural creatures, like zombies, but they're rare. Unicorns, naturally, are just imaginary, duh!).

This vampiric society is dominated by powerful families, Pearl's family, the Sanges, are dominant in their region.
Their clan was rising in prominence. Daddy owned real estate throughout western Connecticut, including multiple businesses in Hartford, and Mother had a head for business that rivaled any CEO’s.
Her father is a "shark." Her mother is ruthless.
You didn’t sit down to tea with someone you were about to punish, but then she’d once seen Mother wait an entire week before slicing off the toe of a distant relative who had crossed into their territory without permission.
And their entire family, however eccentric some members, are to be feared. Of course, they're not without their sense of humor. Like family dinner nights, in which the food...is human.
Their dinner had been presented on a bed of lettuce. Carrots had been stuck in candelabras on either side of the boy’s torso, and his hands had been positioned to hold a decorative cabbage as if it were a bride’s bouquet. He wore a bellhop uniform.
Their society is dominated by power, power play, and mind games of dominance...which makes Pearl's personality so much more interesting.

Pearl:
Pearl didn’t want to adjust. She wanted humans to revert to being merely meals again. She wanted to stop pretending to fit in. She wanted to return to being the ordinary child she was born to be, not a special miracle charged with this impossible task.
I fucking loved Pearl. She has such a strong personality, without weakness as a vampire who sees humans purely as food, which makes her all the more realistic when she finally...due to the stupid unicorn...starts feeling emotions. Pearl is exceedingly intelligent, you don't get to be an idiot being raised in a family in which survival of the fittest is the motto, and therefore, Pearl is so, so tough and cold initially. She's been raised that way, and she can read people like a book. Which is how she knows to interpret the cliques and power structure at her high school.
Others around her nodded wisely, and a few laughed outright. Pearl realized what she was seeing: a shift in power. Ashlyn had shown weakness, and others were jockeying for her position. She wondered how malleable the social hierarchy was and how far Ashlyn would tumble.
Pearl is confident. She is strong, she is beautiful, she is powerful, and she knows it. When a girl threatens her relationship with Pearl's vampire boyfriend, Jadrien...well, Pearl knows how to stake her territory without saying a word (no pun intended).
...She elected to simply wait the girl out.
It didn’t take long.
Every time Jadrien swung Laurie, his eyes sought out Pearl. Every time he nuzzled her hair, he looked at Pearl. Every time he curled his lips and pulled her close, he watched only Pearl. After a few minutes Laurie noticed that Jadrien’s attention was fixed elsewhere.
And just like that, the power structure is shifted. Pearl is so confident and strong in her identity, that I loved seeing her finally expose her vulnerability when she realizes that humans, unlike her vampire compatriots...are not going to stab her in the back. She doesn't have to constantly watch herserlf.
Pearl left the office feeling dazed. Mrs. Kerry at the front desk waved at her as she half walked and half stumbled back toward class. Glancing over her shoulder multiple times, she watched for an attack that never came.
The Romance:
“What’s wrong with me?” Pearl asked. How would she ever undo what she’d done?
Evan touched her shoulder. “Maybe it’s not that there’s something wrong with you,” he said. “Maybe there’s something finally right.”
There is a love triangle in this book, and it doesn't hurt. The romance is so light that it's barely there at all, in the context of an YA book. Pearl is "betrothed" but not formally, to a vampire boy named Jadrien. They have fun together, he is a smooth talker, they're not best friends. Jadrien and Pearl have a playful, flirtatious relationship, they train and fight together.
“Surrender?” she said.
“To you,” he said, “I surrender my heart and soul.”
She rolled her eyes. “Very romantic, considering you have neither.”
Their relationship---like most in the vampire community---is fraught with tension, power plays, and mind games.
“I’m tired of games, Jadrien,” she said. “I play them all night and now all day. But you know what?” She stepped closer to him. “If I have to play...I play to win. You should know that about me by now.”
And it's just Jadrien who will be her future until she meets Evan. The human boy who is unexpectedly kind. Who understands Pearl more than she expected.
“How about you?” she asked. “You seem to have everything under control. What are your issues?”
“At the moment just you.” His voice was serious. “I have a bit of a hero complex, you see, and you need saving.”
Their relationship is well-built, well-drawn. There is no insta-love. There is distrust in the beginning (he is food, after all). The romance is not overwhelming in the least.

Overall: Such a lovely book, the humor is spectacular. I had a blast reading it. There are imperfections in the book, but overall, I enjoyed it so much that nothing else mattered.
Profile Image for Alienor ✘ French Frowner ✘.
873 reviews4,123 followers
February 15, 2021


Truth be told, not only Drink, Slay, Love is loads of fun, but it has way more depth than it appeared at first. Trust me, if I was able to enjoy it even though 1)I don't like vampires and 2)I'm bored by PNR more often than not lately, there's a good chance you will too. Let's take a look at what you have here, okay?



An alpha female vampire MC, who's at the top of the food chain and intends to stay there, even though she starts feeling - UGH - emotions (so annoying). I loved Pearl : she's unapologetic, selfish, kick-ass, smart, and hilarious. What not to love?

"I hope I haven't hurt your feelings," he said.
" I don't have feelings, at least not the inconvenient ones."
"Okay," he said. "I hope I haven't hurt your ego."
"Yeah, that part of me is a bit miffed," Pearl said. "What exactly is not hot about me? You're a teenage boy. I have boobs. What part of the equation is missing?"

A freaking fantastic unicorn!! Of course I was giggling like a complete moron, what do you think!

Not a drop of slut-shaming!

Friendship that overtakes the differences and a complex dynamic between the characters.

"Bethany beamed at her, and the other three girls looked as pleased as cats with milk. She met their smiles with her own until a terrible thought occurred to her :
Oh, crap. I have friends."

Off-the-wall depiction of high school life : Don't get fooled by the appearances, because if almost all the stereotype are present (first of all the different cliques), each and every one of them is dismantled and OMFG IT'S AWESOME!!!

Clothes : "Antoinette selected jeans plus a formless sweater. "This says, 'Too hot to care what I wear. Worship my wit instead.' Best if worn without a bra."
"I'd like a simple, 'I'm human. Move along.'"


Traditions : "It's a corsage," Tara said as she breezed past them into the ballroom. "You wear it on your wrist, and you pretend it doesn't itch like hell."

High-school power hierarchy : Actually, I'm going to let you discover this one on your own^^

An adorable male-lead whom you'll want to hug even if he has a little hero complex.

"You're just the whole package, aren't you? Kind to kittens and puppies. Don't park in the handicap spot. Never leave the toilet seat up. I'll bet the girls melt every time you walk by."

Yeah, well, his chivalrous personality sure didn't appeal to Pearl at first.
"Again he radiated sincerity nearly as bright as the sun. She wondered if all humans were this intrusively nice. It was obnoxious."

Nope. Nope nope nope.

But then,

No instalove. I mean, Evan is food for fuck sake. Would you fall in love with a chicken? Huh? That's what I thought. Icing on the cake, the romance stays light, believable (they don't trust each other at first sight, thank you very much) and never overtakes the plot.

A false love triangle that never feels like a love triangle, because there's no feeling between Jadrien, the vampire hot piece, and Pearl. They're betrothed, that's all. Traditions and all that stuff.

"Surrender?" she said.
"To you," he said, "I surrender my heart and soul."
She rolled her eyes. "Very romantic, considering you have neither."

Family pressure. Hierarchy. Expectations. Vampire's life isn't as easy as food's human's life you know.

"She wondered what kind of punishment constituted a "detention." Mother had several holding cells, each a lightness nightmare. Pearl had been in one once for shoplifting at the mall."

Hilarious dialogues that made me smile so big and again, giggle. I know, I'm ridiculous. Bu-bu-but UNICORNS! Bahahahaha.

► I'll stop there, but trust me, if you need to relax, this book is exactly what you need.

For more of my reviews, please visit:
Profile Image for ✨ Helena ✨.
389 reviews1,095 followers
July 23, 2020
This was so much fun and UTTERLY RIDICULOUS. It was essentially an anti-Twilight as it made fun of all of the well-known vampire stereotypes.

I also thought that the inclusion of unicorns was a nice touch and made it even more over-the-top. Seriously, this book was SO FUNNY.

It was also refreshing to see the “villain” learn to appreciate their prey and come to understand them. Usually, in paranormal books, it’s told from the outsider’s perspective. But here, we see a vampire, who relishes in the hunt, learn what it truly means to be human.
Profile Image for Jo.
268 reviews1,055 followers
August 25, 2011
“A brush with extinction does not excuse unladylike behaviour. You weren’t raised in a barn.”

Initial Final Page Thoughts.
Holy moly, I just finished a vampbook with a smile on my face. WHAT.

High Points.
Pearl. I was snickering here, there and everywhere with this book. Prom. Queen Molly Ringwald. Learning about American High School culture from John Hughes films… which I TOTALLY never did (Love you Duckie.) All you people are vampires… and your stories aren’t stale. Unicorns. Ice-cream. Sunrises. Training sessions. Vampire hunters. Coffee-sodden blood. Family connections. Feasts. Boys who write poetry.


Low Points.
Jadrien.
That’s right.
There’s a character called Jadrien.


JADRIEN?!
I think my heart stopped when I read that little nugget because my body was trying to put me out of my misery at the HORROR of the name Jadrien.
I think that merging two names together is even worse than giving a common name a weird spelling (For example: Mykal, Rycharde, Gneil (silent G, obvz) )
But I’m just going to hope/pretend/assume it’s tongue in cheek and swiftly move on.
This whole story was a bit ridiculous… but I think it was because I kept forgetting I was reading a book about vampires and were-unicorns.

Heroine.
Getting over the fact that your name is Pearl Rose Sange (yes. SERIOUSLY), I thought you were awesome. And not even awesome for a vampire. You were legitimately awesome and very funny and sarcastic and you had steel-toe boots and you’re not a girly girl who is too preoccupied with a mirror (BECAUSE YOU DON’T HAVE A REFLECTION. Lolz)
And you were a cute friend to Bethany (who probably should be referred to in a Best Friend section, but I don’t really have much to say about her. She was fine and suitably ditzy and peripheral, which all good bff’s must be).
You are a bit sceptical about the power and the glory of St Molly Ringwald and John Hughes films and you lots well-earned Brownie points with that (just because you’re moody and angsty does NOT mean you can take their names in vain, Missy.)BUT… you save yourself by liking to watch sunrises.

Which is nice, because I like sunrises, too.


Love Interest.
Evan was cute and wrote poetry and he was funny and he was clever and he was just a bit… wet. And… um…
This is going to be a minute spoiler but if you have ever read a paranormal YA or a book in general, then you’ll have guessed what happens within the first chapter or so.
But if you don’t want to know… skip, skip, skip.
*sigh*… Let’s just say his extra sparkly, glittery appendage would be inconvenient and problematic and ridiculous.

I fancied Jadrien. I’d just call him Jay. He had the gift of the gab and that is important.... also he sounded HOTHOT.

“To you,” he said, “I surrender my heart and soul.”
She rolled her eyes. “Very romantic, considering you have neither.”


Yeah, I’d fall for that. Not even gonna lie.

Theme Tune.
Blood Thirsty Bastards by Dirty Pretty Things.

My heels are all worn down
My loyalties are torn
I’m finding different paths now
I never saw before

And it hurts less every day
The paths lead me away
Lead me away from those
Blood thirsty bastards.


Also, I wonder if Mr Barat is still in contact with Pete Doherty… I imagine his blood would be worth millions on the vamp scene.

Boy Angst.
2/10. YES. That’s right. 2 measly points for boy angst. Which I have to hold my hands up and admit I thought it was going to be off the scale in this department. Vampires do that to me. I just assume they’re all DRAMATIC.
Pearl was a badass and even though there may have been a few eye-rolls (We get it… he has warm eyes that search you)… they were minimal.
HURRAH.
Although…. *sigh*… I’m about 90% sure that there is going to be a sequel and it has potential to be more angst-ridden.

Sadness Scale.
1/10. What? You mean a book about vamps being stabbed by shiny unicorns isn’t sad and hard-hitting and thought-provoking? HOLD THE PHONE, I’VE BEEN DUPED.
Sometimes you just need a book that is just funny and there’s no angst and there’s no hidden agenda and it doesn’t make you learn things about morals and whatnot.
The 1 point is for Ashlynne and her family.


Recommended For.
I don’t normally compare books with other books because I don’t think it’s really fair… but this book reeeeaally reminded me of Hex Hall and Ms Hawkins’ humour. So if you like that kind of thing, you’ll probably like this. People who want to put their brain on pause for a bit and just have a bit of a laugh. People who just want to eat ice-cream without drama and nearly dying. People who think about food in the middle of a miracle. People who wished their prom had eight cardboard cut outs of a certain Mr Pattinson in a character that you’ve probably never heard of (and I’m not talking about good ole Cedders). People who understand the importance of Molly Ringwald. People who don’t immediately assume that because a boy sparkles that he’s a vampire…. He could just be a unicorn…. Or really bad at arts and crafts.

I received a copy of this book from the publishers.

You can find this review and a whole lot of other exciting stuff on my blog here.
Profile Image for Stacia (the 2010 club).
1,045 reviews4,057 followers
May 20, 2012
3.5 stars. So Ms. Britnee and I picked this book as a buddy read. I wasn't sure what to expect from it. Even with the catchy premise, I figured this book was going to be just another run-of-the-mill vamp book. Thankfully, I was pleasantly surprised. I had a lot of fun reading Drink, Slay, Love.

You really can't go wrong with a book which has a girl getting stabbed by a unicorn in the very first chapter. As a bonus, the same girl ends up getting stalked by the unicorn, which was quite amusing to see, especially when her tough girl exterior was shaken by a bit of paranoia.

Pearl, our female protag is quite the character. She's full of sass and snark, and prefers her food to be warm blooded and readily available (a.k.a. lame humans). She doesn't actually want to have to "get to know" her food source, but her family decides to make her do just that when they enroll her in high school after the unicorn injury allows her to walk in the sunlight. Why does she have to go to school and hang out with the humans, you ask? Why for no other reason but to lure hundreds of unsuspecting teens over to the vamp lair to provide a food source for the soon to be visiting vamp royalty. Easy as pie, right? Sure, it would be...but our dark and moody girl is suddenly starting to develop a conscience. Blame it on stupid, rainbow-pooping (her words, not mine) unicorns.

This book was a fun read, and had several humorous moments. For once, the hot and cocky boyfriend was kicked to the curb for a nice guy. There was no teen angst, no pining, no hint of anyone trying to waste away in their bedroom while mourning a lost love. Nope. Pearl was way too cynical and jaded for that sort of behavior. I quite liked her, actually.

Since I read this book as an arc pre-release, I am unsure if it will become a series or not. The ending was solid, but the door was left open a crack for the possibility of a future series. Here's hoping. I'd love to revisit Pearl, Evan and the rest of the gang in the future.

Profile Image for Fafa's Book Corner.
514 reviews345 followers
March 24, 2018
Review posted on Fafa's Book Corner!

Beware spoilers ahead!

I remember how back in 2011 I saw this book circulating everywhere. That was around the time when vampires were still popular. A friend of mine had highly recommended another book by Durst, Vessel. Having read and enjoyed The Queen of Blood I decided to give Drink, Slay, Love a try. I am happy to say that I enjoyed it!

Pearl is 16, a vampire, and simply fabulous! She is apart of the Family (a biological coven), has an extremely attractive betroth, and is soon to be an adult vampire. This all changes when a unicorn stabs her. Somehow Pearl is able to walk in the sunlight. Her parents use this to their advantage to gain some food (humans) to the upcoming King's feast. Wherein Pearl will be an adult vampire. To accomplish their goals the parents enroll Pearl in high school.

Drink, Slay, Love was such a blast to read! Pearl was so funny! The highlight of this book was definitely Pearl observing and coming to understand high school. Pearl coming into her emotions and growing throughout the book was well done. 

Pearl was such a breath of fresh air! She was extremely confident in everything she did. She was a no-nonsense character. Pretty much everything she noted about high school was so true! It was interesting to see her in that setting.

There were quite a few female's in this book. For the most part Pearl was basically friends with everyone. I especially loved her interactions with Bethany, Tara, and her track team. It was nice that Pearl wasn't just friends with one girl but a majority of them.

I loved how for once the queen bee wasn't a terrible person (or a blonde)! Tara was such a joy to read about. She was actually nice while also running the whole school. She wasn't popular based on fear, but compassion and of course confidence.

Bethany was the opposite of Pearl and Tara. She had quite a few self-esteem issues stemming from her abusive family. For this reason alone Pearl and Bethany got along very well. Pearl's family is also quite abusive but unlike Bethany, Pearl had excellent self-esteem and confidence in herself. Amongst all the characters Bethany was able to relate to Pearl and was such a good support. In return Pearl stood up for Bethany and gave her a confidence boost here and there. 

Let me clarify that there is no love triangle. Pearl doesn't really care for Jadrien other than the fact that he's good looking. Pearl instead comes to care for Evan whose Bethany's best friend. Evan was an all around good guy. So much so that he spent most of the book trying to be Pearl's hero. He has a large hero complex. It was annoying at first but I grew to like it.

Vampire society as a whole was very abusive. Pearl didn't have good relationships with any of her family members. Save for her father who was barely there. There was a lot of mind games and competitions off who was the better and stronger vampire amongst her cousins.

I liked how the author poked around with all high school and vampire stereotypes. One of Pearl's cousins wore lots of pink but was still totally terrifying. Especially that last conversation between Evan and Pearl.   

The plot twist with Bethany and Evan in cahoots was completely unexpected! Evan and his family are all were-unicorns whose main job is to hunt vampires. Bethany has Evan stab Pearl in hopes of her gaining emotions and being good. This also helped tie into Evan's parents plan of trying to stab a majority of the vampires at the ceremony.

What was even more unexpected is that Pearl enlists the help of her classmates to stop the King's feast. She actually told select classmates that she's a vampire. And laid out the King's plan to kill all the students attending prom. The classmates for the most part took it surprisingly well. And together they all (Evan's family included) came up with a plan. Which was awesome! And so much fun to read about. 

However I did have some problems. I actually skimmed the beginning because Pearl's family (and all vampires) had such an annoying speech pattern. It actually put me to sleep. I felt that the explanation Evan's family gave about unicorns was rushed and could've been handled better. Maybe with more page time.

Overall I really enjoyed Drink, Slay, Love! I highly recommend it as it was a unique and original vampire story.   
Profile Image for shady boots.
504 reviews1,968 followers
May 2, 2015
4.5 stars. That was a hell of a blast. Awesome story, awesome humor, colorful cast of characters, and fucking UNICORNS, man!

I am legit PISSED that there's no sequel, because the ending was really open-ended and practically begging for it to become a series. Almost to the point where it might've been planned to BE a series at first but the sequel(s) got canceled or something. That would be a real bummer, cause I would've loved a continuation of this. So many possibilities, unanswered questions and unresolved storylines.

I had so much fun, and you guys have got to read this if you haven't. Even I'm beating myself up because I didn't read it sooner.
Profile Image for Giulia.
186 reviews260 followers
August 13, 2023
Thanks to Dorothy, who got me this book as a gift!

It's raining outside and I have no intention of opening my Modern History textbook, so this seems like as good a time as any to review this book.

I read Drink Slay Love in one sitting. Now, I know that the cool kids say that vampire books are crap, but bear with me for a second. Personally, I really like the idea of vampires - I mean, bloodsucking human-like monsters who rule the night and feed on humans? Sign me up! - but I do tend to have a problem with most vampire books. And I'm not even talking about the whole Twilight phenomenon and the abusive vampire stalker aka Sparkly McSparkle, but the entire genre seems to be filled with paranormal romance tropes, and you all know how much I love paranormal romance.

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Which is precisely where Drink Slay Love finds me. And let me tell you, this was one hell of a good book! I only expected a funny, light read, but I got so much more than that.

Pearl Rose Sange (I know. Blame the vampires.) is a sixteen-year-old vampire. Like everyone of her kind, she cannot stand the sunlight and she feeds during the night; and then there's the Family - which is a little bit less like a real family and a little bit more like the mafia. Vampire society is based on hierarchy and fear: the vampire king of New England rules all the Families, and the oldest vampires are the heads of each Family. Pearl is the youngest, but certainly not the weakest: she can hold her own in a fight, and she is never alone. Not by choice, but with the Family, you're never truly alone. Vampires are violent, clever and merciless, and there were a lot of delightfully creepy moments in the book - like when the dinner was alive on the table and softly humming a song, a side effect of the vampire venom in his system, while waiting to be drained by the whole Family.
Things suddenly change when Pearl, after a hunt at her usual place, crosses paths with a unicorn - yes, you heard me - and said mythical horse drives his horn through her heart.

Pearl burst out laughing. "Seriously? A unicorn? Please."


After her Mother assigns her an extremely important mission - to attend high school, befriend the humans and bring them to the Vampire King's feast to serve as refreshments - Pearl slowly starts to realize that something inside her is changing. She stops seeing humans solely as preys, and she starts to develop a conscience, something that vampires should know nothing of. Enter Evan, the boy with an hero-complex, Bethany, the cherry blonde perfectionist, Mark and Zeke, wannabe vampire hunters, Pearl's crazy and violent Family (they literally tear each other apart whenever they disagree) and the terrifying Vampire King.

While a lot of characters deserve to be mentioned - such as Sana, the track runner that Pearl befriends at school, Jadrien, Pearl's psychopath vampire boyfriend and last but not least the King, who actually gave me goosebumps, Pearl herself really stole the show. She was confident, beautiful and sometimes vicious, when her vampire nature took over, but she was also smart and determined. Pearl was the only one that ever dared to defy the Family, and she was irresistibly charismatic; everyone was drawn to her like a moth to the flame. The romance was quite cute, and while I did like Evan, even though the hero is not really my type, I have to say that I mostly had eyes only for Pearl.
This book was not just hilarious (and believe me, it was) but it was also a new and refreshing take on vampire stories that explored family dynamics and friendship, and was also able to make me feel a pang of sadness. Pearl suddenly understands how little her family values human life - people are just food to them, after all - and how humans themselves tend to forget about other people when everything's all and well, remembering about them only in death.
Highly recommended, and even if you're a vampire books skeptic, you may want to take my advice and give this book a chance.


(2016 read)
Profile Image for Meredith Holley.
Author 2 books2,362 followers
July 2, 2012
Gurl, I hate to be the one to tell ya, but your boyfriend is totally gay. Gay as the day is long. I know you’re new to this whole “humanity” thing, so I’ll give you a couple of pointers. Your guy might say “she walks like the night,” but when a dude calls you a lady of the night, it’s not usually a compliment. Also when a dude is , pretty clear signal of gay. So, when your bf is calling you a prostitute and IS a . . . man, you know your relationship better than me, but it might be time for a serious DTR. Don’t wait for the facebook post.

Until he comes out, I could really see you guys digging some of these helpful tips from Cosmo, now that you decided to cross that interspecies line. They’re just so you.

I gotta tell you, though (since we’re having this brutally honest talk) that when you go on and on about OMG, are people who are different than me reeeeally peeeeple??? It makes me want to die. I truly, truly, truly do not understand why someone hasn’t killed this topic of debate. They are peeeple! SOYLENT GREEN IS PEEEEPLE!! I’m so over that. It has been scientifically, sociologically, and statistically proven that Muslims women cylons people are fucking people. And two hundred pages of you realizing that people are people . . . kill me now.

Also, and now I am addressing you, Ms. Durst: if you are trying to somehow be satirical about vampire romance, you totally failed. Read A Shore Thing and see how it’s done classy. Also, bad form to have a character make fun of Buffy. Bad form!

Let’s talk about Twilight for a second, though. Where were you going with all of that? Were you satirizing it or fan fic-ing it? I am so lost. It felt like you were trying really hard and failing to make fun of it, which made me very uncomfortable. How is it making fun of Twilight to write a vampire girl who falls in love with someone sparkly and sharp and kind of controlling and converts to his culture for him? I’ll tell you how: it’s not. So, instead, this is just fan fic that takes a dig at its mommy fic quite frequently. AWKWARD!

So awkward. Everything. I mean, Twilight deserves criticism, sure, but at least there are cars flying places and people plotting and attacking, and oh my god finding out what sort of mythical creature everyone is. I totally hate it in books when it takes people forever to realize what mythical creature everyone is. So boring. But, my point is that at least Twilight is not just people sitting around fucking thinking about how sweet humans are. MAYBE . . . or are they?

That’s another thing. Humans are NOT that sweet. You set up this weird dichotomy where the characters could be either Charles Manson or Rainbow Brite, and that sucks.

I wish this story wasn’t about stupid, stupid unicorns, but was about screwicorns instead. I think I hate unicorns.
_____________________

The publisher provided me this book in exchange for nothing. And I am grateful for that, even though this book was terribly boring.
Profile Image for Zuleeza.
404 reviews263 followers
December 23, 2011
This review is also available on my blog, Qwerty

How about I first show you the picture of how I feel about this book.

Yup, if unicorns can poop rainbows, I can figuratively vomit rainbows just because this book was unexpectedly awesome.

Btw, I'm proud to declare that I was the first person who read the copy from my local library!! I may have to purchase this book later so that I can highlight all the hilarious lines!

I finished this book in one sitting but I was too sleepy afterwards to write the review because it was already freaking 2 a.m.

Why I'm telling you this...

ANYWAY, I honestly want to give this book 4.5 stars because well, while it offers a sheer joy, it's not one of those books which will establish a new genre or even establish a new insight into fiction writing. And of course, some of the scenes were downright ridiculous. But, I cannot resist but to round it off to five stars because this book excels to entertain with such a simple premise, without going too deep into all the complex mythology, and that's a rare thing to accomplish. Again, it felt sooooo good to read a stand alone book.

I think there was not a single character that I didn't like. As stereotypical as some of them may be, the dialogues are totally witty and smart.

The only drawback is entirely my fault!!! Honestly, my fellow Goodreads members, it's not so hard to include spoiler tag!
Profile Image for Tamora Pierce.
Author 132 books84.5k followers
September 9, 2011
What a wild ride! Pearl is a vampire teenager in good standing preparing for her inauguration into the ranks of adult vampires. She has everything--a great wardrobe, a love of driving fast, and a very hot boyfriend. Then she is staked by a unicorn. Not only did she live, but she is changing--she's just not sure into what. Sent into the local high school to size up a vampire banquet, she discovers her former prey are people, good and bad (and funny). Caught between her old world and her new, she has to make hard decisions, with her life in the balance.

Durst is funny, witty, and great when it comes to a girl balancing between two worlds. While the book is presented as light, there are some gut-wrenching passages. Pearl's changing feels natural all the way, and her loyalties are wonderful. I love this book!
Profile Image for sandeep.
104 reviews69 followers
July 30, 2019
5/5 Stars

A story with lovable characters, humour, cuteness, vampires and unicorns. UNICORNSSSSSS. How can you say no to that?

Vampire girl gets stabbed by unicorn, yes a unicorn, I know, whaaaaatttttt? Which causes her to become a daywalker among other cool things. Later her family is delighted with this outcome, then they make her enrol in high school so she can make lot of human friends and lure them in to be slaughtered by hundreds of vampires for the vampire king’s feast but starts feel twinges of a conscience and questioning everything. At the same time also being stalked by the unicorn. Sounds fun.

I’ve missed the vampire genre and I felt it was time to jump back right in and damn this book was a perfect choice.

This book was just loads of fun!! Could not put it down!! Read the whole thing in one day!!

The characters were great. I loved Pearl she was such a badass. And Evan was just so sweet and caring and so lovable AHHHHH!!!

Honestly one of the best plot twists I've have ever read. I felt like screaming and at the same time as I was laughing my head off.

I’m kind of bummed that there is no sequel because I want more of this story and the ending was open. But at the same time I feel this book is good as a stand-alone.

This book is perfect fun and relaxed read!!! Would recommend!!
Profile Image for Mlpmom (Book Reviewer).
3,096 reviews395 followers
September 16, 2016
I know what you're thinking after reading that synopsis, sparkly horned unicorns and vampires...um, right.

But let me tell you, this book was so much fun. So ridiculous and just plain and simply, a good time.

So the short and sweet of it? If you want to roll your eyes, have a good time, and escape for a few hours of smiles and laughter, pick up this book, you won't regret it.
Profile Image for Evie.
727 reviews757 followers
September 4, 2011
*** Originally posted to: Bookish Blog


One word: WOW.
Never before have I read a vampire book that left me totally speechless. Drink, Slay, Love by Sarah Beth Durst is, hands down, one of the best (if not THE best) vampire novel I have ever read. And the best part is I wasn’t at all expecting it! It was one of the first five books I received from the wonderful people at Simon & Schuster Canada, and – I’m sorry to admit that – one that I was least excited for. As a matter of fact, I didn’t even know I was getting it – it came as a total surprise! I picked it up thinking “yet another vampire novel to get through” and before I knew it, I was completely engrossed in the story and absolutely in love with Sarah Beth Durst’s unique take on the vampire world! I enjoyed reading Twilight series with its friendly (&sparkly) squirrel-sucking vampires (don’t judge me, you know you liked it, too, at one point!), I really loved CV Hunt’s dark Curt Cobain look-a-like bloodsucker, I devoured Anne Rice’s gorgeous Vampire Chronicles, but this… This was beyond awesome. In Drink, Slay, Love, Durst reached a whole new level of fabulous. I could happily sit down and read it all over again. And who knows, I might just do that!



Pearl is a teenage vampire. She’s also stunningly beautiful and undeniably evil. Being a typical, heartless (figuratively speaking) creature of the night, Pearl not only has no reflection and no heartbeat, but also no conscience (or any other human feelings) whatsoever. Just like others of her kind, she’s a nightwalker – even minimal exposure to the sun could prove fatal for her. Same goes for playing with fire – apparently vampires are also highly flammable. Despite all that, Pearl is perfectly content with her “life”. Sure, she might not be very fond of some of her family members and yes, she could use a little bit more freedom, but she has her drop-dead handsome vampire boyfriend (Jadrien) and she enjoys “snacking” on the young Dairy Hut worker. Smart, strong and irresistibly gorgeous, she makes a perfect predator. What else could she possibly want?

Pearl’s “perfect life” gets turned upside down when she crosses paths with… a unicorn! Unfortunately for our blood-sucking friend, this unicorn is not here to happily bounce around and poop rainbows. In fact, mr-sparkly-and-pointy stabs our heroine straight through her heart with his horn. And, believe it or not, that’s just the beginning of her problems. Next thing she knows, the sun doesn’t hurt her anymore, she can see her own reflection and – wait for it – she starts feeling bad for her prey! And all that happens at the worst time imaginable – just when the vampire King of New England is about to come to town for The Fealty Ceremony. Not to mention that this once-in-a-century event is going to be hosted by her family, and she’s the one responsible for providing, uhm, let’s call it “refreshments”. Before she knows it, she’s attending the local high school and making human friends. What will she do when the time comes to serve up her new friends as party snacks? What’s a vampire with a freshly awakened conscience to do?



Vampires and unicorns – doesn’t it sound freaking amazing? Well, it totally is! Actually, it’s even more amazing that you guys can imagine. Not only is the story line fresh, original, deliciously quirky and completely engrossing, but there’s literally nothing in this book that I would change. Not a single character that I wouldn’t like, not a single boring passage, no loose ends, no what-the-hell-is-going-on moments. Non. Zero. Null. The plot is nicely thought-out and skillfully executed. All the missing puzzles are graciously falling into the right places as we read. The unicorn mystery didn’t really surprise me – I actually figured it out quite fast – but the way Sarah Beth Durst unraveled the whole thing was actually exciting, rather than get-over-with-it-already-you’re-annoying-me kind of thing. The chemistry between all the characters was top-notch. Especially between Pearly and Evan. Would someone try to tell me a couple of weeks ago that there will come a day when I will be getting excited over a vampire-unicorn romance, I would probably give you my best hell-no look and told you to get lost. But then Durst came along with her fan-freaking-tastic novel and next thing I know I’m reading about it with a heart beating ridiculously fast in my chest. It was really good. And she didn’t overdo it either, which I really appreciate! There’s barely any actual romance at all, I was mostly getting excited for what might happen in the next books (because there are going to be next books, right? RIGHT?!).



Pearly is a wonderful heroine. She’s just plain gorgeous. I loved her snarkiness and dark sense of humor. She was going through a lot, her whole life was getting messed-up and yet she wasn’t whining of feeling sorry for herself. She was tough. She’d much rather find the one responsible for all her problems and kick his/her ass, than sit around crying and hoping for a change of fate. She’s a doer, she fights for herself. I really liked that about her.

Evan is hot, but he’s also all kinds of awesome and sweet. And on top of everything else, he’s also quite mysterious and charming. Plus he has a not-so-dark secret and adorable hero-complex. I love Evan. Period.

There are, of course, many other fantastic characters in Drink, Slay, Love. Some are more essential to the plot than others, but each and every single one of them brings something unique to the story. There’s not a character that I would say was unnecessary or a waste of ink. Take the nerdy duo ��Zeke and Matt. They’re like ripped straight from the Big Bang Theory! I could read this book again just for their awesomely geeky conversations! Sarah Beth Durst really knows how to make her characters vivid, realistic and three-dimensional. I’m so in love with all of them!

I’d recommend this book to everyone, regardless of your usual reading preferences. I am pretty confident that once you start reading, you won’t be able to put it down.
Profile Image for Misty.
796 reviews1,241 followers
October 9, 2011
I wasn't sure what to expect going into this one.  I mean, the cover is one of my hands-down favorites of the year, and the teaser synopsis that was released earlier this year is just brilliant (What happens when a vampire is stabbed through the heart by a were-unicorn's horn?  She develops a very inconvenient conscience.  Oops.)  But it was the kind of idea that could have been very, very right or very, very wrong.  Thank god, it turned out to be very, very right.  Drink, Slay, Love is one of the most purely fun  books I've read in awhile.

And a big part of this is Pearl.  Pearl is one of the most absolutely delicious MCs I've read in recent memory. She's smart - and a smart-ass - and she has this great dark humor to her as a result of being a vampire. I love her reluctant humanity and just-as-reluctant budding romance. But a big part of what makes her so fun is that she works on two levels: there's the Pearl that is very aware and serious about her vampire-ness, and is freaked out by the fact that she's changing and *gasp* growing fond of the food, and there's the part of Pearl that the reader sees that is almost like dramatic irony - there's what Pearl says she thinks and wants, and then there's what she actually does and what the reader can see happening.  So her dark humor remains dark throughout, but becomes more humor and less just seriously dark.    She's never super cuddly, and even when she realizes what has happened to her, she is just as much pissed off * about it as she is reluctantly pleased.  It's so fun to read, and I'm so glad that Durst didn't make her mopey or all that nice. She's a biting character (hardy har har), and I enjoyed that.

And Pearl's fun voice extends to the whole novel.  Drink, Slay, Love is enjoyable because it's aware of the books that come before it, and it pokes gentle fun at them.  I mean, there's a vampire-themed prom with cardboard Cullen cutouts.  Pearl laughs to herself when the sunlight through stained glass makes her "sparkle".  It's just this great tongue-in-cheek, wink-and-a-nod story that doesn't take itself too seriously, and I love that.  I also think it was a wise move on Durst's part to work from the accepted myths of vampires, rather than creating her own.  It could have been risky, could have come off as lazy, but it didn't because it was well done and saved on ridiculous info-dumping while allowing her to be playful and have little inside jokes with the reader.  It also gave her room to work with the unicorn mythos and play with that a bit more.  I absolutely loved the idea of having supernatural creatures (vampires) who don't believe in other supernatural creatures (unicorns), and I loved that the unicorns were the ones to sort of perpetuate their own myths as myths.

I keep saying "I loved it, it was fun, I loved it, it was fun" and I guess that's what it all comes down to.  This book doesn't make you work for it.  It allows you to just have fun, to relax and enjoy the story, and laugh and laugh.  But it does so without being throwaway fluff.  You can tell Durst had fun with this story, and as a result, the reader has fun too.  Highly recommended, especially as a funk-breaker for those reading funks we all go through.


*Here's an excerpt of what I mean by this.  Pearl finally learns what exactly happened to her and her reaction is very honest and true to who she is, as well as being a good point, I think.  But it's slightly spoilery, so...

"You still want to save me, even after...what I told you I did."
"Of course," he said.
Gently, she touched the side of his face, cradling his cheek in her hand.  She felt his warmth against her cool-as-a-serpent skin.  "But you already have."
He quit swaying, and he stared at her with his brilliant eyes, so earnest and pure. "You mean that?"
She wished he hadn't asked.  It had been such a perfect line.  "No." Pressing closer to him, she said in a whisper that was barely above a breath, "You messed up my life in a high-handed, daddy-knows-best, alpha-male way and reshaped me to suit your own ideals without regard for my culture or family background, not to mention my personal wants and needs -- and that's if I'm being charitable..."

I adored this.  If I didn't already love Pearl by this point, I would have whole-heartedly after this.
Profile Image for Jessica.
Author 28 books5,795 followers
November 1, 2011
Oh, I loved this book so much! Pearl is so wonderfully . . . not human. So used to the manipulations and compete emotionlessness of her own family. And the blending of vampire and unicorn mythology? Genius. A very fun read, made even more delightful by Durst's excellent storytelling and wonderful writing.
Profile Image for Cereja Cult.
Author 0 books40 followers
April 19, 2016
Reviewed on 03/23/2012

As I read this book I couldn’t stop thinking about the Addams family. The dark humor, the emotionless expressions and the simple disdain over the humans feelings in general.
The crazy uncle, the dark and scary dad, the mom that can rule the house with a steel voice, is all there, but with an extra evil souse on top.

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The Plot – Think of all the things you know about vampire and unicorns. Think in all the stereotypes. Think of all the glitter and sparkly (not the vamp’s glitter cose this ain’t Twilight, I mean the Unicorns LoL) Now throe it all away, cose this is something completely new and you don’t want to hung on your ancient believes when you are reading this. The key is to keep your mind open to everything you see. I’m not saying that I fell for everyone of the explanations and theories in the story. I mean, I still don’t believe in that crazy story about the unicorns and their propose in life and stuff. Does that mean I love the story less: Hell no!! The story was awesome even with the nonsense parts.

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As you can see in the Summary, Pearls is an average Vamp, going around, biting necks, hanging out with her vamp boo and kicking some ass defending her territory.

description

Pretty (para)normal, right? Well, but that changed when she met with an,(drums, please) UNICORN!!!!! LoL

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Ok, Ok, that doesn’t sound so terrifying, but he is not that cute. He stakes her in the heart and that’s the end of her (un)life.
Well, not literally. Figuratively is more like it. She starts to act funny and have thoughts that are not her usual thoughts. She thinks that she may have some bug or something, but then stuff got really mess up. She discovers that she can go out in the sun.*really dramatic music*

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That’s my favorite part of the book. The wonder of seeing something new and wonderful for the first time. Having something that you never imagined being possible to have. I certainly went to stand in the sun like a fool after reading this part of the book. And it was wonderful. In a dorky kind of way, but wonderful, nonetheless.

So, the plan changes. Her family is supposed to host this super duper important vamp party and they want to use Pearl’s new ability to “hunt” dinner for the party. Piece of cake, right? Wrong!!!! Pearl is having some uncomfortable feelings and don’t know what to do anymore. The party is coming and her time is running out. What to do? What to do? What to do? What to do? What to do? *squeal*

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Pretty unusual plot. Me like it!

The Characters – Pearl is my fave.

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She is cold and shows no emotion or respect towards humans. To her they are nothing but a meals and, sometimes, entertainment.

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There’s a part where they are all gathered around a table talking about gossip and the grand event wile a human guy is immobilized on top of the table like a xmas turkey about to be eaten by the happy family. Our heroin feels annoyed by his constant moaning, whimpering, and stuff. I know what you’re thinking, but don’t be so hard on her. Is not like you got any emotional attachment to the turkey on Xmas day either.
I love her dark sense of humor, the way she sees and experience things are so unique and totally unexpected. The other characters are cool too, but the cool stuff is due to the way Pearl sees them. She even nicknamed a few. LoL So funny.

description

The Writing – How can I describe her writing? *scratching my head* What words can I use to tell how good it is? *squinting my eyes* How can I explain the dazzling influence it had on me? *rubbing the bridge of my nose*
Ok, it will be hard, but I’ll try. Imagine you are in a magic show watching the Great what-ever-is-the-name doing magic and stuff. Picture the light, the shadows and the skanky girl in a bikini on the stage. Razzle dazzling you into believing that magic is real. The voice and movements are so enticing that you can’t help but fall for it. After the show you are left you a goofy smile and a star trucked look. Do you believe magic is real after that? No. But in that moment it didn’t matter what was real. You still enjoyed yourself and that feeling makes you want to believe in magic.
That was the way I felt after reading this book.
Considerations – This is more like a warning. This book can make you do things. Yep. Before I read it I was a (not so)normal girl with (not so)normal life living my life like (not) any other girl. After I read this book I’m a chocolate chip mint ice cream addict that gets all dorky when sees the sun. *shaking my head*
What have you done to me Durst????? *raising my arms and shaking my fists*


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This reading is part of the following Reading Challenges:




2012 Reading Challenge
155 reviews266 followers
September 30, 2017
3.5 stars
"I am a blood sucking fiend" she said "I'm not supposed to be reassuring"'

Drink,Slay,Love is a refreshing book free from all usual YA and/or PNR cliches. It is equally funny, dark, and romantic and most importantly features unicorns.

It is set in modern-day Connecticut where vampires live unknown to humans. The vampires in this book aren't the usual 'I feel so bad about my bloodlust blahblahblah'. They are evil, monstrous and proud of themselves. The author depicted the vampires accurately. They are infectious to sunlight,holy water, garlic and are definitely not sparkly. The vampires live in form of clans. Clan Sange , from which our MC, Pearl, belongs to, is dominant in east Connecticut.

Pearl Rose Sange(yes yes I know...blame the vampires) is sixteen year old born vampire (which means she had never known what is it to be a human) of clan Sange. She is at top of food chain and plans to remain there. She is strong, clever, funny and really really evil. Her favourite food is ice-cream boy named Brad who taste best after he had eaten chocalate and mint flavoured ice cream. One night, after she had drank blood from her food, she was stabbed through her heart by a unicorn. Yes, a unicorn.
'...he sparkled like a horse-shaped disco ball. His traditional spiral horn beamed like a toy saber.
Pearl burst out laughing "Seriously? A unicorn? Please"'.
The next day when Pearl woke up, she discovered some unbelievable things about her . She can walk in the sunlight without getting burned and she also happens to have a reflection. Pearl's family aren't too happy to discover these changes but there are more issues to cope up with. The vampire king of england is coming to the Fealty ceremony and Pearl's family is the host. So her parents assigned a task to Pearl of bringing food for King and his guards for the ceremony by hunting in the daylight in the High School. Because obviously, what tastes more delicious then angsty teenagers?

So Pearl enrolls in high school and what follows was heartfelt journey of
▪Pearl making new friends,
"Bethany beamed at her, and other girls looked as pleased as cats with milk. She met thier smiles with one of her own until a terrible thought occured to her 'Oh crap! I have friends'"

▪Falling slowly in love with Evan, who is sweet, kind and writes poetry, (He also have hero complex but he's still awesome)
"You're just the whole package aren't you?Kind to kittens and puppies. Don't park in handicap spot. Never leaves the toilet seat open. I'll bet the girls melt everytime you walk by"

▪And, very reluctantly, discovering her conscience (ughh the emotions)
'"You know this conscience thing is a bitch. I don't want humans to die." Blinking away the raindrops she looked at him. "Yes, I can admit that."'
This story has fun vibe and never really took itself seriously (although it has some sad moments). It's a bit silly story but if you are looking for a fun, light read then do give it a try!

However, the reason I gave it only 3.5 stars is because it was very....putdown-able for me.(this is not an actual word). It was enjoyable yes but I would read few chapters a day and then put it down and start another book. It didn't keep me on the edge of my seat really. But then, it might be the case of 'it's me not you' only.
Profile Image for Marga .
287 reviews369 followers
June 21, 2014
“You’ll never make it through life if you let
irrational fears freeze you all the time.”


Brief summary:

Pearl Sange is just an ordinary vampire who takes a sip of blood from humans here and there. One day, she was attacked by a unicorn and it's horn staked her ribs! Now, she finds herself being able to bathe in sunlight! But something more than that changed about her and she's finding out if it's a good thing or not..

The plot:

Ahhh this story was so unique and refreshing. The humor was not forced and it just flowed naturally. Gaah, I find myself giggling and snickering every freaking time. I'm shocked to see that I am entertained by a vampire book very much! I can't tell you guys enough how much I enjoyed reading this!

The characters:

“You’re a teenage boy. I have boobs. What part of the equation is missing?”

Pearl. Ahhh I love this heroine!.She's fun and feisty without being too girly. Look at that quote above, now do you see why I liked her?? Well, I don't think you do just by reading that so read the friggin' book!

Evan touched her shoulder. "Maybe it's not that there's something wrong with you," he said. "Maybe there's something finally right."

Evan. I KNEW IT. Anyway, it's not that hard to guess, really.

This was one of those books that you can't help but liked everybody! All these characters had contributed something interesting in this story. I loved the Sange clan, Matt and Zeke, Bethany and really, just all of them.

The romance:

There's only a little amount of romance in this book and I liked it! It's light, sweet and adorable.

This was so much fun! (Well, I knew I told you that already bit whatever.) I recommend this to anyone who is in need of a good laugh. This is the perfect stress reliever. Gaaah book, you came at the right time.
Profile Image for Elena.
228 reviews
March 30, 2012
Cute.

So you’re used to vampires trying to control the world, strolling around draining people dry and occasionally falling in love with moronic humans?
So you’re used to werewolves and all that?
You want something new?
Well, then that’s the book for you.
No more vampire drama; here the feel is like you’re inside an Adam Family environment. The vampires sleep through the day, wake up at night, steal cars when they feel like it, and make out.
Oh, and play chess for fifty years trying to beat themselves.
As for werewolves, witches, and mythological creatures, guess what?
You have were-unicorns.
Yeah, you heard that right.
Honestly, when I first read that, I burst out laughing. No wonder Pearl did, too.
So, our heroine is out at nearly dawn, catching a little snack before going to sleep (seriously, that does sound kind of normal), and suddenly a sparkly unicorn appears in front of her. And stakes her. Hi – La – Rious.
Pearl isn’t even angry at the unicorn—mostly she’s shocked. Not only has she just discovered an utterly funny mythological creature she'd never believed in does actually exist, with the appearance of a sparkly horse (did Stephenie Meyer think of this before writing Edward Cullen’s description?) with a nice horn protruding from his head——and his wrist, and the palm of his hand, occasionally,—— but she also gets staked by "it".
This was probably the funniest read I’ve had in a while, and I totally appreciated it.

When *spoileeeeer* Evan suddenly transforms in the unicorn I was like ‘thank God it wasn’t me in Pearl's shoes, otherwise I would’ve laughed at him forever, and that wouldn't be good’.
Hahaha. Jeez, how loser can you be to have that kind of power, and be a UNICORN? People will laugh at you for the rest of your life.
And kids will probably try to do your make up.
Well, the good life. Hahaha.

Anyway. I loved Pearl.
Seriously, she’s a badass. She doesn’t care what people say (only because they’re human and she’s got this whole vampires-are-better complex in her head, but still) and has the guts to make fun of a teacher.
Plus she humiliates the drama-queen of the school, gets a crowd of students following her every step, and has the hottest boyfriend among vampires.
Yep, she’s a badass.

All changes, anyway, when sparkly-corny decides to stake her, and she starts going through an internal crisis. Ergo, she suddenly feels guilty for drinking from humans (seriously, when did that ever happen to a vampire? except for Bella Swan and Stefan Salvatore, that is), she starts having conversations with humans and——tum tum tum——enjoying them.
Whoa-oah, that’s so not right.
Pearl is desperate, she doesn’t know what to do.
It doesn’t help that her parents keep pushing her over the edge, making her work night and day——literally, not even caring how she feels.
She’s not the same, and she can not go back.
So what will she do, betray everybody who’s been only kind to her since the beginning, or keep faithful to those who never really cared about her?
The choice sounds simple, but there’s more to it than that.

Even in this situation, though, she never lacks her sarcasm and her I-don’t-give-a-damn attitude, which is the part I like more about her. Plus when I read things like “She wasn’t one hundred percent sure she’d show up in a photo. Ordinary vampires didn’t. On the other hand, ordinary vampires didn’t attend junior proms with were-unicorn dates while plotting to sabotage plans for a mass murder”, I was literally rolling on the floor laughing.

So, in the end I think I’ll give five stars to this book. I don’t know if it was or not the author’s intention to make it this funny, but it really cheered me up, it was a nice and fast read which made me laugh and smile.
So glad I picked it up.











Though I actually didn't get the Celebration by Kool and the Gang reference!
Profile Image for Ari.
940 reviews1,348 followers
March 20, 2015


When I first came across this book featuring vampires and were-unicorns, I thought: "what the hell, this should be fun", as fun as any parody can be.. and it has been for a while, with Pearl's witty voice and her slow transformation from the soul-less vampire to the 'humanized' one.
But when it got to the point of her choosing between her wanna-be-friends and her family, I didn't find it funny any more and any amount of wittiness was pointless.

I mean, yeah, she had a crappy family, as little as I knew about them I got to hate them all, but still.. if I had to choose between my family and all the people around the world, with all the conscience in the world I would be as selfish as hell and choose my family. Judge me all you want, but this is me. And I don't think that a silly shinny unicorn would change this, not in this life time.

So, as long as I thought about this book as being a cute parody to the all-around vampire books flooding the reading world, all worked for me.
Yeah, it was fun seeing how the author managed to make me laugh about the shiny vampires (we all know which ones) in the same time shoving some shiny unicorn down my throat. It was fun to see how the main character managed to see and judge the relationships between her schoolmates, it was fun to see how she got in even more trouble by trying to solve some small problems..

Now, if only the ending would have been different.

What I never understood was why would she choose to trust her new friends. Why would she risk her family for them. I would have believed it better if she was deeply, over-the-head in love with her shinny unicorn-boy. Love is supposed to make you blind and stupid (as some say), so this is the perfect excuse in YA literature for all the silly decisions the characters have to make.

But Pearl was smart and I expected more from her.
Oh well, she did say that humans were stupid, and she was turning somehow human-ish, this implying that maybe she was turning stupid as well.. that might make sense, either way I had to take down two stars from the rating. It was a bit frustrating as all this went against Pearl's built-in personality and it felt convenient in a not-so-pleasant kind of way.

But if you are not over-thinking the story like I seem to be doing, and I shouldn't either (for god's sake it's an vampire vs. unicorn story!!), then you might enjoy it quite a lot.
Many of my book friends loved it, and this is the reason I picked it up - it was highly recommended by trusted reviewers - but I can't love them all, right?
Happy reading!


This review can also be found at ReadingAfterMidnight.com

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Profile Image for Irina Elena.
714 reviews168 followers
August 3, 2016
VAMPIRES AND WERE-UNICORNS. Do I need to say anything else?

Let's start with basic info about why I shouldn't have liked this book:
1. It has vampires;
2. It has high school cliques;
3. It has a mean family.

Now let's see why I did like it – a freaking huge lot – in no particular order:
1. Pearl. She's hot, confident, sarcastic and generally badass.
2. The Family. Loved their cruelty, their hierarchy, their traditions, and the single members, Cousin Jeremiah, Daddy and the crazy Aunts in particular.
3. The Karkadanns. Now let's pause for a second and think about two things:
a. how fucking awesome is this name?
b. how fucking awesome is it that this is a family with eight adopted were-unicorn kids?
4. The subtle social commentary on high school cliques.
5. Matt and Zeke – they're my middle school best friends' American alter ego, no kidding.
6. The funny names Pearl called the unicorn. Among them, “stupid, shimmery, speedy glorified donkey” and “elusive hoofed wonder”.
7. The Brad situation. That kid broke my heart, honestly.
8. The change in mood about halfway into the book. After a funny, leisurely walk into the vampire and human high school worlds, we start to feel how conflicted Pearl really is. This part is more serious and even a bit sad, if you know what to look for.

This book was either almost perfect or exactly what I needed these days – probably both. It sucked me in right from the beginning and kept me curious and glued to it until the climax of the Ceremony – which was, by the way, seriously creepy. One tiny, little niggle? Evan was cute, kind, funny...but completely unremarkable, if it weren't for his unicorn-ness.

Bottom line: bored of vampire books that take themselves too seriously, love triangles or insecure, shallow heroines? There's a really good book I've read recently...
Profile Image for Maggie ☘.
577 reviews749 followers
March 3, 2019
So I just saw the movie for this and... 1. ahahaha but also mostly cringe 2. there were no unicorns! Here is a short trailer.

In all honesty, this is the kind of smidge ridiculous book that doesn't try to take itself too seriously and can make fun of itself perfectly. The book was light, and weird and above all hilarious. The MC, Pearl, was opinionated and sassy. The romance sugar sweet.

The movie follows the book pretty closely at first, except for the unicorn stuff (lmao), but it didn't somehow come though in the same way as in the book. Sometimes it made fun of itself too, but it was just so cringey. It wasn't nearly as fun as the book. I did like the actress they chose for Pearl at least.

Still, if you've read this book and are interested to see what an adaptation for it would look like, just telling you there is one out there, for whatever reason. lmao
Profile Image for Sheila Beaumont.
1,102 reviews164 followers
June 3, 2019
I thoroughly enjoyed reading this hilarious vampire & unicorn fantasy. In this very entertaining tale, a 16-year-old girl vampire is stabbed by the horn of a sparkly unicorn stalker, then finds she can withstand sunlight, catches glimpses of her reflection in mirrors, and starts to see humans as real people deserving of compassion rather than as meals. It's a fun read, even for those who aren't usually into vampire fiction. I would have loved to see a sequel so I could find out what happens next.
Profile Image for Louisa.
497 reviews394 followers
June 29, 2014
4.5 stars. That was bloodsuckingly awesome. And hilarious. And turns all the YA vampire tropes on their heads, or at least outright make fun of them. Who needs Twilight when you can decorate your fang-themed prom with Twilight, New Moon, Eclipse AND Breaking Dawn memorabilia? No one!

BONUS UNICORN.

Profile Image for rin.
414 reviews474 followers
April 21, 2016
“Do you believe in vampires? Not the sparkly variety.”

I am trying to find hilarious book like Demons at Deadnight or Unspoken. I'm trying desperately. I need something really funny w/ interesting plot and awesome characters. So when I found this one I was like 'Oh', then I read a premise and was like 'OH', then I scrolled to reviews and was like 'OH!' (I don't usually read reviews before reading a book, but I needed to). So-o, I picked this book.

Was it funny? Yep, it was. This book has my favorite kind of humor - it's full of sarcasm and witty remarks. Author did well - the humor doesn't feel forced. By the way, I love how cliches and sterotypes were criticized here. It wasn't offensive, it was just really laughable. So the comic part of the book gets high mark from me. It wasn't what I wanted, but it was something else.

Were the characters awesome? Oh yes, they were. Pearl is the best. She's smart, selfish, strong, she kicks ass, she has self-respect, she has sense of humor, she's just your amazing book girlfriend (doesn't matter if you're straight or not). I fell for her and I don't want to get up.
I also liked Evan aka the love interest. He's kind and gentle. And cute. His hero complex is kinda ridiculous, but well, it's in his nature..DONTLOOKIFUWANTTOREADTHISBOOKITLLSPOILALOTFORYOU Sooo, Evan is great, I loved Evan.
Bethany! Oh, girl, do I love Bethany. She's the cutest thing. Some people may find her annoying, but I liked everything about her. And their friendship with Pearl? Cutest. Thing. Ever.
Zeke and Matt, Evan's family , Pearl's Family, people from Pearl's school. There are a lot of interesting characters, a lot of character's you getting attracted too (even if they're like merciless soulless vampires who don't care about people at all). So yeah, this part also gets high mark for me.

And now the plot. I liked a lot of thing about the plot. I liked the insanity of this vampire-gets-staked-by-the-unicorn-becomes-a-daywalker-starts-to-have-emotions thing. I liked how Pearl was stalked by The Unicorn and how she tried to find him. I liked friendship, parentship (Evan's parent ofc). I liked the dumb duo aka Zeke and Matt, they were a delight. High school hierarchy. High school image at all. I liked that there was no insta-love, not love triangle (there was something like it but it was different). I liked almost everything. BUT. It was so hard to read. I don't know why but it took me a lot of time. Yep, I had exams, it may be one of the reasons, but there were days, when I just couldn't read more than 1-2 pages. I don't really know why. It started so cool and fresh but ended kinda boring? Like slow? I honestly don't know. So the plot didn't do it for me. It lacks something but I can't tell what exactly.
All in all, I'm giving it 4 starts out of 5. It's enjoyable stand alone novel which would totally lift your mood.

p.s. i have one question. only one question. i don't get the ending at all.

You can find this review here where i attempt to create a blog but it looks kinda miserable now lol
Profile Image for Susana.
1,009 reviews262 followers
August 23, 2014
4.5 stars



Let me tell you this: In the past I've read so many paranormal romances featuring "vampires" that it seems I've finally reached my limit! I am talking about favourite series, still on going series, that all of a sudden I just stopped reading. After a while they all seem the same.

That is... unless you give me something new. Which Sarah Beth Durst most definitely does.

The author picks up on the "traditional" clichés that abound on today's YA market, and completely de-constructs them, one sparkling vampire and unicorn at a time...

For instance, the vampires on this one aren't your "Cullen" variety, if you get what I mean. They're the: I'm going to drink your body dry... type.

They're our basic stuff of nightmares, who only see humans as snack time...

Pearl, a sixteen year old teenager, is a product of this "vampiric" environment, but forget about warm and fuzzy feelings when it comes to her family! Her parents, aunts, uncles, cousins, are all bloodthirsty monsters, and she knows better than to show weakness.

But one day she has an unwelcome encounter with a mythical being.

The "you stabbed your horn into my heart you... unicorn" moment has however a strange side effect... besides the not dying part. You see, Pearl is, as of now, the first official nightwalker to also become a daywalker!

It's great! Finally Pearl gets to see the sun, and us humans in all our shining glory! lol

What is great about this, is that the author doesn't make the obvious mistake of trying to transform Pearl in Miss Goody Two shoes. Yes, some "things" have changed, but not everything, as her diet regime confirms.

She's still a vampire, do not mistake her for a fluffy kitten with overdeveloped fangs.

Thing is, despite the obvious parody of the genre, Sarah Beth Durst's story manages to be more realistic when it comes to high school dramas/dilemmas/relationships than other books I've read that seem to get caught in the whole:
_Girl on girl hate...
_Girls fighting over boys...
_Girls only thinking about boys, boys, and boys!
_Boys who are presented as nothing more than brainless eye candy/ or the abusive macho type.

You'll be surprised to know that the teens portrayed here are drawn as being actually smart people, with a healthy dose of sarcasm, and self irony.
Hey, even the vamp studies! And you know what?
She makes friends and she even discovers a healthy hobby!

The story also deals with family dynamics and toxic relationships. It was a clever way to mix themes such as those, in a supposedly "all about fantasy" book.
The romance is cute without ever turning overbearing.
On and on an extremely well developed story that mixes real life issues with fantasy, with well drawn characters that will leave you salivating for more... no pun intended.
Oh, and I can just say, how wonderful it is to read a stand alone story??
It's amazing!

Also, this was my fist book by this author, _and since I loved it! _ this means I have a long list to go through.
Yay, more books to read in this lifetime! o_O


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