THIS WAS THE BEST ROMCOM/FANTASY I'VE EVER READ. If there's a "most unique and refreshing book" contest THIS IS THE WINNER FOR ME.
I HAVE NO WORDS FOR THIS WAS THE BEST ROMCOM/FANTASY I'VE EVER READ. If there's a "most unique and refreshing book" contest THIS IS THE WINNER FOR ME.
I HAVE NO WORDS FOR THIS. ZERO. I just pity the readers who are yet to meet Minnie and Marlowe.
Oh god HOW WAS THIS NEVER DONE BEFORE? HOW IS THIS SO PERFECT?
I LOVE YOU VERONICA LANCET. I mean, romcoms? I don't read them. Fantasy? Very rarely. MAKE THE HERO A SERIAL KILLER NEURODIVERGENT AND THE HEROINE A SUPERNATURAL BEING WHO IS HOMELESS WITH GORE AND MURDER AND YOU EXPECT ME NOT TO READ THIS??
Any book which makes me laugh this much is an immediate 5 star read. MOST FUN I'VE HAD THIS YEAR.
Dare I say that Marlowe beats Aaron Warner in terms of his delusion in every best and worst possible ways??? Oh dear lord, Marlowe is not just one in a million, there is nobody like him. ...more
I was so sure that I wouldn't cry and I ended up shedding tears. Jewel E. Ann it's all you and your magic of words.
I knew before the release of this bI was so sure that I wouldn't cry and I ended up shedding tears. Jewel E. Ann it's all you and your magic of words.
I knew before the release of this book, that if anyone can make me read a love triangle, it's her. And I couldn't be more accurate. The day JEA stops writing, that'd be the day I cease to read altogether.
It's two love stories. Wrapped in one. You might think it's a love triangle. It's anything but that. Romance books which go far beyond the typical love story and make it romance is the kind of book you can expect from JEA.
Impactful. Meaningful. Angsty. Parable. Soul crushing. Beautiful. Life altering....more
Lola is so freaking funny and uncensored. Exactly the kind of heroine I love to find. Gotta explore more of the author's works now. Can't miss out on fiLola is so freaking funny and uncensored. Exactly the kind of heroine I love to find. Gotta explore more of the author's works now. Can't miss out on finding unfiltered heroines now that I've met Lola.
::::::::::::::::
I leaned forward. “A non-disclosure agreement? Aren’t these those things that mean I’m not allowed to talk about something you are going to show me? Is it a really weird mole? Because this might be a bad time to admit I have a thing for pulling out hairs. If you show me a hairy mole, I’m totally busting out the tweezers and having the time of my–” Christian raised his palm toward me without a sound, cutting me off. I gulped and leaned back in my chair, hands on my thighs. “If you sign this, I’ll tell you why you’re really here. If you don’t, I’ll give you a severance package and you can be on your way.” “Oh my God. I read Fifty Shades a few years ago. I mean… Your name happens to be Christian… Are you actually some kind of perverted sex fiend?” I clamped my mouth shut when I saw the look on his face and pressed my lips together. “Sorry. Bad time for jokes
-----
Lola jumped back suddenly, smiling while practically gasping for breath. “Sorry. I’m a little bit of a hugger. It won’t happen again. Sir.” She added that last bit after a delay. “Well, it won’t happen unless you do something really nice again. If you are nice to me, I can’t promise I won’t hug you.” “I’ll do my best to avoid being nice,” I said flatly.
-----
Mr. Stone stared. “Your dog escaped into a creek this morning and you had to jump in to save her?” “After I’d already showered. Yes. So I had to shower again. Can you believe that?” “I don’t, no. This is your first and final warning, Miss Thorn. I do not tolerate tardiness.” He took my arm in his hand and dragged me toward the elevator. I felt like a child getting scolded by her super-hot, grumpy teacher. I should’ve been mortified, but some twisted, perverted part of me hoped we’d get to the spanking part once the elevator doors closed.
-----
I clenched my fists, biting out the words. “You owe me nothing, Lola. This was all my choice.” She got up and grabbed the bowl of soup, carrying it to the sink and setting it down. “Then at least tell me what this is all really about. If you have feelings for me, act like an adult and just say so. I’m tired of the games.”
YESS ADULT CONVERSATION. She is so direct, leaving no possible miscommunication. I LOVE HER. -----
I shivered, melting into his touch when he put his big hand on my cheek, cupping it and drawing me closer. “Last chance to run, Butterfly.” Oh, was he still rolling with the social butterfly nickname? “Why? Do you have handcuffs hidden in your pants or something?”
-----
“I want to taste you so fucking bad,” he growled. His stubble tickled my inner thighs. “Help yourself,” I whispered. He looked up, quirking an eyebrow. “I suck at dirty talk, okay? Just… do your thing. Please,” I added.
-----
“We’ll come back here, and I’ll fuck you so good you won’t have any energy to feel guilty. Then–” “Fuck me so well,” I corrected. “No. I’m going to fuck you good. And I’ll fuck that proper grammar of yours, too.” I scrunched up my forehead, pulling back to look at him. “If I knew good grammar was going to get me fucked by a man like you, I would’ve paid a lot more attention in school.”
-----
I grinned when I rolled over to find Lola sleeping beside me in a pile of messy, tangled hair. Her mouth was hanging open and drool glistened at the corner. She had one leg thrown over the edge of the bed and an arm draped over her forehead. It looked like an explosion had sent her flying and she’d just landed in a heap on my bed. I leaned in slowly to kiss her forehead. She sucked in a surprised breath through her nose, snorting and rolling over to begin an impressive string of snores
-----
Okay okay enough! I need to stop quoting all the Lola fun in this. I might end up copy pasting the whole book.
➺ I've had 4-5 star recent reads, however, very few made it to my all-time-fav list. So it comes as no surprise that a book by6 "No Take Backs" Stars✰
➺ I've had 4-5 star recent reads, however, very few made it to my all-time-fav list. So it comes as no surprise that a book by Jewel E. Ann is now joining that exclusive group. It's difficult for me to precisely pinpoint what i loved in this story. If I were to describe the couple's extraordinary and endearing way of expressing their love through hilarious banter, resulting in delightful moments and scenes, I would essentially be reiterating what I've mentioned in all my previous JEA reviews. Maybe that's why I hadn't read all of her books until now. I didn't want to keep encountering perfection. It's challenging to explain why, but I suppose I wanted to avoid meeting the books which have the potential of ruining me for other more regular, ordinary and mundane ones that are prevalently popular. It's almost as if I've subconsciously been practicing a self-preserving act until this point, which has led me to the decision of unearthing and binge-reading JEA's older works.
➺ This was a slightly different story from her usual extraordinary tales, since I don't recall ever reading about a virgin Harvard aspirant heroine with a scarred back, a troubled past fueled by insecurities, and an older, enigmatic guy who happens to be eight years her senior (she is 21).
“I notice everything about you, but I only see the things that matter.” He has no idea what those words mean to me, there’s no way he could. There’s also no way I can hold back the tears that fill my eyes.
However, i was sold the moment i read these lines of the blurb :
Oliver’s days are predictable and his nights are lonely until he meets Vivian on the subway. Her long raven hair, green eyes, and mile-long legs are achingly sexy, but the way she "innocently" fingers and licks her Boston Kreme doughnut can only be described in two words—complete torture.
Oh, how wonderfully entertaining and saucy scenes were sparked by her notorious obsession with doughnuts! ...more
“We should go after the girls.” “Yes, we should.” Neither of them moved. Alex bit her lip. “We’re going to kiss instead, aren’t we.” He caught
“We should go after the girls.” “Yes, we should.” Neither of them moved. Alex bit her lip. “We’re going to kiss instead, aren’t we.” He caught her in his arms. “You’re goddamned right, we are.”
THERE IS A FREAKING REASON TESSA DARE IS KNOWN AS THE QUEEN OF HR COMEDY, PEOPLE!!
"You are the worst example of false advertising. I was led to believe I was hiring a prim scold. Then I learn you’re remarkable and bold and interesting.”
♥♥
Even a less than 5 star book of hers has all the feels I expect from her books and more. It's seeing the collab of Ashbury from book 1 and Chase (H) here that I didn't knew I would be getting. Ash's infamous cat and Chase's two unusually perfect little girls would definitely make such a great team. Literally every Ash × Chase interaction is HILARIOUS AF!
Ash walked past her to stare down Chase face-to-face. “You deserve to know what a worthless scoundrel he is, Alex.” “Yes!” Chase exclaimed. He reached for Ashbury’s hand and pumped it in a vigorous greeting. “Thank you. I’ve been trying to tell her myself, but she won’t listen.” Ashbury looked more than a bit thrown by Chase’s invitation. He gave Alex a what-the-devil-is-he-on-about look.
♥♥
“You know, you two have so much in common. You ought to be friends.” “We are nothing alike,” Ash sputtered. “No one could possibly confuse us,” Chase agreed. “Of course not,” Ash continued. “One of us is a repulsive monster, and the other was scarred at Waterloo.” She spoke over their protests. “You should see yourselves. You’re giving me identical scowls right this moment.” “I am not scowling,” the two men said. In unison. While scowling.
♥♥
AAND, this is probably THE BEST if-you-hurt-i'll-kill-you speech i've ever seen in the history of ALL the romance books. I think its something to do with me being partial to Ash lol.
Before departing, Ash addressed Chase. “If you hurt her, in even the slightest way, I will eviscerate you.” “Understood.” “I mean it, Reynaud. In fact, gutting would be too good for you. I will subject you to my cat.” “Your cat?” Chase laughed. “To mewl at me, I suppose.” “Trust me. We’re not speaking of the average cat.” Alexandra spoke up. “I can attest to this.” “I’ll strip you bare, tie your hands behind your back, smear salmon on your manly bits, and lock the two of you in a wardrobe. Once he’s clawed your ballocks to shreds, I’ll crush whatever remains of you to a bloody, formless pulp.” “Good Lord.”Chase sounded a little awed. “That’s remarkably vivid. Did you plan all this out just for me, or do you keep a list of gruesome threats to use as the occasion arises?”
♥♥
It's the real versions of love declarations over the cheesy sweet nothings that makes me swoon. Them being their real usual selves>>> I love that only Tessa Dare characters are realistically sweet and hilarious together, it's pure magic which makes me addicted to her characters.
"I think the world is spinning.” “The world is always spinning.” He exhaled in a soft groan. “Well, that’s the truth. It’s spinning all the time.” “How about this. What if I say that you’re my world. You’re not spinning.” “But I am. We all are. We’re on the earth, and it’s spinning, so we’re spinning, too.” “You are ruining all my sweet nothings.”
♥♥
Honourable mention of the 10 year old Miss Rosamund and her little sister Daisy who are the cutest most unhinged kids ever! :
"Have you ever seen those girls so happy?” “Of course they’re happy,” he replied, sounding markedly less enthusiastic about it. “Daisy is surrounded by death, mummies stacked three to a case, and even Rosamund couldn’t dream of this much plundered gold.”
“Disease!” Daisy cheered. “Which ones?” “Very, very boring ones,” he said. “And don’t cheer. It was misery. Now if all that wasn’t bad enough, once you were convicted in court?” He drew a finger across his neck in a throat-slicing gesture. “Beheading,” Daisy awed
♥♥
I WANNA COPY PASTE THE WHOLE BOOK HERE, (just like i feel everytime i read Ms. Dare's books) but there are some bits and scenes special to the characters that one should come across on their own without prior knowledge (just like in every book by Ms. Dare which makes them stand out)
“You had better leave a detailed note for the great-great-grandchildren,” Ash said. “That would require them to have children first,” Emma pointed out. “Excellent observation. We’ll get on that right away.” Chase clapped his hands together. “On that note, good night and good-bye. All of you.”
♥♥
“You are the last person I want to see.” “Well, you are the last person I want to see, too.” She gestured in exasperation. “Then why are you—” “You are the last person I want to see before I fall asleep at night. Every night. The last woman I want to kiss for the remainder of my life. And your lovely face is the very last thing I want to see before I die. Because I love you, Alexandra.”
4 days later I'm writing this review of my first favourite HR which put me in a slump only Tessa Dare can get me out of. This book got me binge watchi4 days later I'm writing this review of my first favourite HR which put me in a slump only Tessa Dare can get me out of. This book got me binge watching Outlander. I don't read much HR, I can count on one hand how many I've read before. Thanks to my good friend Venus who recommended me this masterpiece, I am hooked.
➺ I did NOT knew HR could be this humorous with witty banter, Aaron Warner spice (yes thats a thing), a unique premise and a relatable, lovely, blunt and hilarious heroine. The writing style? one of the reasons I couldn't get into HRs but here? its chefs kisses. Folks, I believe I found the one. The one who can get me addicted to this genre. Her name is Tessa Dare.
Letter : My dear imaginary Captain MacKenzie, you are not real and never will be. I, however, am a true and eternal fool. Because, you see, you are mad for me. Utterly consumed with passion after just a few chance meetings and walks along the shore. You made me a great many promises. I was reluctant to accept them, knowing how our nascent love would be tested by distance and war. But you assured me that your heart is true, and I . . . And I have read too many novels, I think.
“Loving you is realizing heaven isn’t a place, but a person.”
➺ I'm surprised by how much i love this book. This couple. Their banter. Their hilar“Loving you is realizing heaven isn’t a place, but a person.”
➺ I'm surprised by how much i love this book. This couple. Their banter. Their hilarious conversations and literally every fucking thing they do when they are with each other. I initially was planning to give this 3 stars until i realised there's 50% of the book still left.
➺ Fake relationship isn't the trope i prefer to read voluntarily. However, i went into this blind and thus this trope came outta nowhere and smacked me in the face. But the way that it happened made me feel a little less uneasy because it wasn't something i thought was going to be sticking around for a long time.
With this trope comes certain obvious things like characters second guessing every romantic moment between them and chalking it up to it being fake and something the other one clearly did for the "show". And that's something i dislike.
She’s like a rainbow after the storm, and I’ll be damned if she fades away once the sun breaks through the clouds.
➺ Here comes a twister. I saw i just reached 50% and there's still half the book left so i continued. And OMFG!!! They are perfect! They are cute! But most importantly, THEY ARE FUCKING HILARIOUS.
I don't think anyone understands me when i say I'd love to read funny romances where the MCs are actually hilarious like laugh-out-loud funny and not just some sarcastic remarks here and there. It's honestly rare to find.
➺Forget them fake dating and shit, they are so fucking cute, I honestly had to put the book down yesterday night to sleep because my single ass can't handle sweetness.
“Loving you is like being stranded in a desert without food or water. Like I’m half delusional, wondering if this whole damn thing is a mirage, because nothing should feel or look this good.”
➺ The fact that this book also deals with a serious topic of people dealing with disability and Santiago's obvious emotional struggle with his low self-esteem was phenomenally portrayed. And i absolutely freaking loved Chloe for always showing him she's sticking with him in such badass ways
➺ How she never gives up on him while also not being a doormat (mainly because Santiago is smitten and not an asshole despite being a grump) shows what rarely ever occurs in adult romances and it's : The couple sticking with each other, having each other's back, helping each other fight their demons and progress to a healthy relationship through communication and not just assumption. I loved how they just straight up came out with it and said they'll give this relationship a real chance and went from there, instead of assuming shit and never being on a same page.
➺ It's honestly amusing to me how I unknowingly chose the last book of this series and it ended up becoming not only my fav but also the author's most underrated one. Compared to the dreamland series -atleast the first two books- this is so much better and much worthy of being hyped imo!
I’ll love Santiago Alatorre for as long as the wildflowers keep growing in beautiful chaos.
This is the bestest cutest most funniest adorable and my absolute favourite college romance book EVER!!
10 *IOU* Stars✰
oh god. What is this trope?? ThiThis is the bestest cutest most funniest adorable and my absolute favourite college romance book EVER!!
10 *IOU* Stars✰
oh god. What is this trope?? This "grumpy nerd in disguise hero" and this "silly but strong heroine" idk what to call this. BUT WHAT IS THIS MUSHY FEELING I AM HAVING INSIDE. I AM FEELING SO GIDDY reading about them, his pov where he is doing his best to "maintain a reputation" of being this scary intimidating guy infront of her but HE JUST CAN'T HELP HIMSELF.
I FEEL LIKE I'M INTRUDING IN THEIR DOMESTIC LIVES. AND WHAT IS HAPPENING?? WHY IS SHE SO CUTE AND CRAZY AND HILARIOUS AND WHY IS HE A GRUMP AND ALSO A NERD WHO IS HIDING A SOFT SPOT FOR HER??
WHY AM I TALKING IN CAPITALS?!!!!
Showing her I cared that she didn’t starve was the worst thing I could have done. It didn’t matter that I pushed an IOU across the table last night and barked out orders for her to remain scarce tonight. She’s not scared. Maybe she is a little; she did hustle out of the kitchen when I was yelling at Rowan on the phone earlier. But the air has shifted. Ainsley James realizes that I’m not as scary as the rumors make me out to be. Which. Is. A. Fucking. Problem.
***
It’s cute the way he acts like he doesn’t give a shit, but yet, he’s checking on me. Of course, his voice strains, like he had to force the words out, but the point is, the big bad wolf cares, even if he would love for me to believe he doesn’t.
***
I think you like people to believe you’re this big bad, beer-drinking, poker-playing god. But really, you’re just a water drinking nerd.”
***
The TV is on and playing her aquarium show. I moan. “Can we please watch something else tonight?” Her lips flatten, and she gives me the side-eye like how dare I request to watch something on my own TV
***
Maverick really is cute when he's being all awkward, looking around like he’s scared someone will recognize him at Crush It, a place where you can literally smash anything.
***
Thank you for saying all those nice things about me.” A groan vibrates in his chest. “Shut up.” “I mean it. It was really sweet.” He’s just a big old scary teddy bear
***
Any trivial thing she does, she gets an IOU. No, she’ll never pay them all back and honestly, I don’t expect her to. It’s just a game between us at this point. Once I surpassed the limit where I knew she would never escape me, I started writing them just for the fuck of it.
***
I love buying toothpaste once a month because you use all mine. I love waking up to you in my bed and burning macaroni and cheese on the stove.” A tear rolls down her cheek. I swipe it away and replace it with my hand. “I love watching your stupid walrus show.” That gets a laugh out of her. “They are sea lions, don’t act like you don’t know the difference.”
GAHH!!! how is it that I've NEVER encountered such couples even in the books which are actually advertised as a "grumpy guy who only has a soft spot for her" type of trope. Like THIS IS WHAT I WANT TO SEE. THIS. THIS AND THIS.
*sigh* i wanna own this book. It's so expensive here. And there's not a better cover. WHY GOD WHY?...more
If there's such a thing as a wholesome stalker, Callum is him. If you love the infamous stalker Zade Meadows but wants something which isn't dark, a tIf there's such a thing as a wholesome stalker, Callum is him. If you love the infamous stalker Zade Meadows but wants something which isn't dark, a tamer version of him yet still morally ambiguous, you'll love this. Infact, even if you actually hated Zade because of his unquestionably darker than necessary actions and behavior, Callum is the guy you'll find no issues simping for.
“There are a million shades of gray between good and evil, love. Am I on the darker end of the spectrum? Yes. Am I a bad man who does good things or a good man who does bad things? Both. But you made this monster your slave. All of what I am, good and bad, light and dark, belongs to you.”
♡♡♡
“I know I’m damaged. But all my broken pieces belong to you.”
Still not convinced? Let me start over.
At the heart of this hilarious story is our manipulative hero, a billionaire who's quite the stalker. I gotta admit, he's one-of-a-kind, with a captivating, unhinged and sometimes unsettling personality. However, there is an undeniably endearing quality about him. His extravagant gestures and unwavering pursuit of the spirited and humorous heroine, he succeeds in enchanting us with his outrageous antics, leaving us utterly smitten. What's with him getting Emery's (h) name tattooed all over his body on every part of him as we progress. The signed copy of her favorite book. All the priceless first editions. It's Outlander btw, ooohh and our Jamie Fraser has such a significant role in the plotline, it's just adorable. <33
He says softly, “The tattoo is the first of many I’ll get with your name all over my body.” My breath catches. I study his profile as my pulse begins to race. “But…why?” His expression contemplative now, he reaches for the small silver cream server on the tray. “Because I’m yours. You’ve tattooed your name on everything inside me. The least I can do is make the outside match.”
Speaking of the heroine, she's an absolute gem. With her razor-sharp wit and a penchant for dishing out some epic comebacks, she never fails to keep our hero on his toes. I couldn't help but adore her for the funny ways she devised to pay him back whenever he crossed the line. I love how she made infant shit sandwiches as a payback to him handcuffing her to bed and leaving her all night. Or the time when he disposed of her Volkswagen without telling her, and she crashed his favorite Bentley. Ugh this is the type of banter and bickering i look for in an enemies-to-lovers. Ofc their chemistry leaps off the pages, you can count on finding Jessa Kane level of spice ;)
When I whimper softly, he moves his hand down from my jaw to encircle my neck. “Sweet little lamb,” he murmurs against my lips. “Hungry, aren’t you?” “Why do you have to ruin everything by talking?”
♡♡♡
He murmurs, “Be a good girl and ask for my dick.” “Or you could be a good boy and just give it to me.” He presses his teeth harder into my nipple, but if he thinks that’s a punishment, he’s crazy.
What makes this book stand out is its ability to blend comedy in a marriage-of-convenience romance seamlessly. The author has crafted a story where the boundary between love and hate is hilariously blurred. The constant battle of wills between our unconventional duo keeps the plot engaging and ensures that laughter is never in short supply. This is why JTG is my fav author.
“Your face is red again.” “And you’ve got more spinach stuck in your gums.” “You also forgot your engagement ring.” “If you reach into your suit pocket right now, I can guarantee I’ll draw blood.” His intense gaze drifts up from my mouth to my eyes, where it electrocutes me. He murmurs, “Are you threatening your fiancé, darling?” “Yes. And if you call me darling one more time, you can say goodbye to your two front teeth.”
While the premise might seem far-fetched, it's the sheer audacity and unapologetic nature of the characters that make this book an absolute riot. The author's writing style effortlessly captures the zany energy of the story, and I found myself snorting with laughter more times than I can count. Which is hard to believe because THIS ISN'T A ROM-COM PEOPLE. But then again this JTG we are talking about, the author of the Queens & Monsters series, so it's not that surprising there's comedy in the story which has unorthodox elements such as.. well.. stalking, kidnapping, manipulation, elaborate scheming blah blah.
"What the hell is happening, Callum?” He drops his hands to his sides and blasts me with his most withering, he-man look, towering over me like Godzilla about to ransack a city. I say flatly, “Yes, you’re very scary. Happy?” “No.” “What a shock.”
If you're a fan of non-traditional enemies-to-lovers stories, where the hero's pursuit knows no bounds and the heroine's retaliation is delightfully bitchy, this is an absolute must-read. This book will take you on a rollercoaster of emotions, from laughter to disbelief and ultimately to rooting for this unhinged duo to find their happily ever after. What's more? It's hard to find a heroine in a billionaire romance actually using his money. And the ways she spends it and uses it to her advantage just makes me love her even more. The time when she bought a red Ferrari when given his American express card as a way of to cure her nervous breakdown about marrying him through retail therapy, is just chefs kisses.
In conclusion, Liars Like Us is a gem in the morally gray trope, delivering hilarious moments and unexpected twists that will leave you grinning from ear to ear. While the plot twist wasn't hard to guess, and i knew it significantly earlier, the depth of the twist was still surprising. So grab a copy, buckle up, and prepare to be swept away by the uproarious journey of these unconventional lovebirds. Cannot wait for the next book in the series which is Cole's story! (Callum's brother)
When liars like us fall in love, everything else falls apart. But, for now at least, we’re falling together.
P.S : Dont forget to read Queens & Monsters series! My personal fav is Carnal Urges
I love to see these rare kind of heroines who protects, defends, stalks the mmc, rather than the mmc doing that, for a change. The fact that Autumn thI love to see these rare kind of heroines who protects, defends, stalks the mmc, rather than the mmc doing that, for a change. The fact that Autumn thinks she is Declan's guardian angel and thus, does everything in her power to stop him from any harm and that's why she stalks him, is so fucking adorable and probably the first time this concept has been written....more
Is there any book of Penelope Bloom that doesn't have humor in it? doesn't make you laugh out loud because it's so hilarious? I don't wanna know even Is there any book of Penelope Bloom that doesn't have humor in it? doesn't make you laugh out loud because it's so hilarious? I don't wanna know even if there is.
Sometimes you just need a book to make you forget all about your life problems and have genuine fun. Even if it's ridiculous, even if it's nonsensical, you just really need a good laugh. Actually funny romances are also rare. Another rarity is heroines groveling in books. So, when that happened here? It was so adorable because Natasha is so cute and a clutz in a im-not-trying-to-be-quirky-I-just-dont-have-any-survival-skills way that I absolutely dig!
Onto my next Penelope Bloom read!
_________
She spilled coffee on my shirt, which forced me to use one of my spare outfits. Frankly, I wasn’t even confident that a single spare outfit would be enough with this woman rampaging around in my life. She dented the company car when she was pulling it out of the parking garage because she swerved to avoid ‘a huge grasshopper,’ even though I’d lived in New York City for most of my life and never once seen a grasshopper. To top it all off, the banana she brought for me wasn’t ripe enough.
*****
I quietly fumed the rest of the way to the office, and nearly put another dent in the car when I ramped up the curb and narrowly missed a street sign with the front fender. It had been a while since I drove a car, and despite what people seemed to believe, it wasn’t at all like riding a bike. Then again, I had a long history of bike crashes, so maybe they weren’t entirely wrong.
*****
Keeping her at my side might have been more about keeping her alive than it was about whatever this strange game we were playing was.
*****
Want to get lunch before we go back to the office?” he asked suddenly. I looked at him in surprise. “What, like a date?” “Business meeting,” he said quickly. “You don’t pay me and you don’t let me do anything remotely important. I’m going to call it a date if you won’t.” He grunted, but didn’t argue the point.
*****
“I swear. I’m not usually the blushing virgin type. You just have a talent for embarrassing me.” I chose that precise moment to bump my water and splash all the rolls and most of the tablecloth. I set my now-empty cup back upright and looked at the ceiling like I could expect some angel to come down and reverse time for me. Maybe they could go ahead and rewind about a week while they were at it. Bruce didn’t even flinch. “You know. I think that was the longest you’ve gone without some kind of act of supreme clumsiness since we’ve met. It has been at least half a day.”
*****
Oddly enough, coming with her hadn’t felt like a choice. Natasha was accident prone and unlucky. She sometimes overlooked common sense in frightening ways, and the more I got to know her, the more I felt I needed to be by her side at all times just to keep her alive. But coming along didn’t feel like it was just about that. I wanted to be there for her when I saw how upset she was.
*****
I followed him if he went on a business outing, but beyond that, I was forced to wander around the office and pretend I was busy. One of the easiest things I’d found to do was to sneak a paper off someone’s desk and make a bunch of copies of it. Then I could carry it around from one end of the office to the other until there was something to do. It was ridiculous, and I knew Bruce knew, because I’d finally complained about it to him a few days ago. The smug bastard had just told me he liked seeing the “funny little ways” I came up to pretend I was busy. “Hmm,” I heard Bruce say as he walked up from behind me. “A hundred copies of somebody’s order receipt for fiber pills from Amazon. Yes. I can see why we would need to circulate that around the office.”
*****
She leaned her head forward, and to my surprise, she pinned my zipper to her front teeth with her tongue in a seductive little pose and tried to pull it down. In classic Natasha fashion, it slipped out of her mouth. Her cheeks flushed red, which only made me even more turned on.
I loved this book really, truly, honestly, earnestly, properly.
"I beg your pardon, Your Grace. I must have misheard.” “I said I will make you
I loved this book really, truly, honestly, earnestly, properly.
"I beg your pardon, Your Grace. I must have misheard.” “I said I will make you a duchess.” “Surely . . . surely you don’t mean through marriage.” “No, I intend to use my vast influence in the House of Lords to overturn the laws of primogeniture, then persuade the Prince Regent to create a new title and duchy. That accomplished, I will convince him to name a vicar’s daughter from Hertfordshire a duchess in her own right. Of course I mean through marriage, Miss Gladstone.”
Tessa Dare really decided to go on this path to become my first fav HR author with her laugh-out-loud romances.
“Did you follow me?” “I am a duke. Of course I didn’t follow you. I had you followed. It’s an entirely different thing.”
LMFAO. This man. His humor is everything.
"Has it not occurred to you that I might have pursued you out of some genuine concern for your well-being?” She gave him a doubtful look. “I’m not saying I did. Only that it should have occurred to you.”
I love these kinds of couples.
"Dear husband, I don’t believe I shall.” He dropped his fork and glowered at her. She smiled and reached for a nearby bowl. “Would you like more sauce, sweeting?” His fingers strangled the stem of his wineglass. She could practically hear the grapes calling for help. She hoped that was a good sign. “If you don’t cease that nonsense,” he said, “you will regret it.” “Is that so, my heart?” He plunked one forearm on the table and turned to face her. Piercing blue eyes, striking scars, and all. “Yes.”
Emma's aggravatingly sweet pet names for him>>>>
Emma nibbled at an apple tart. “I’ve been thinking, dumpling.” He flopped back on the bed and groaned. “Em-ma.” "When we're in the company of others, I will call you Ash or Ashbury. When we’re alone, you’ll allow me my little pet names.” “Fine. But you must confine yourself to an agreed upon list. No more rainbows and buttercups.”
"You should want to leave, too.” His voice darkened. “Unless you want to lift your skirts and sit on my lap so I can take you right here in the box.” “You are always making these suggestions as though they should be threats. Meanwhile, I’m only intrigued.”
Tessa Dare's heroines hits different! Ugh I'm in love with her historical romances!!!! She really puts something in her works to make me not only read the marriage-of-convenience trope I dislike but actually love it, that also in historical....more
This is such a must read! Kidnapping mafia romance with THE BEST heroine. And THE BEST banter. Sloa10+++ stars
Re-read : 27 Feb 23 Read : 28 November 21
This is such a must read! Kidnapping mafia romance with THE BEST heroine. And THE BEST banter. Sloane is not hilarious. Hilarious is Sloane. The fucking best of best. If i could, I'd just copy paste the entire book here. Still remains my fav heroine and THE BEST. I clearly don't have more words to describe. Sloane is the kind of heroine you'll NEVER see in captor-captive romance EVER. She is not just one in a million. There's NO ONE like her. Also, if you despise those conflicts in these tropes where the antagonist threatens the FMC and her family or the hero and she folds so quick because "if she won't co-operate they'll kill him", SLOANE WILL FUCKING SHOW YOU HOW IT SHOULD WORK, trust me, her loyalty knows no bounds. MUST READ. I repeat. MUST READ.
“But I don’t want to have one of those situations where some stupid misunderstanding could be cleared up with a simple conversation, because I hate that shit. It’s lame.”
tell me, does this sound like a immature relationship which is bound to fail because of stupidity of lack of communication??????? SLOANE SLOANE SLOANE...more
There is a freaking reason why Jewel E. Ann is my top fav author!!!
➺ She just has this magic in her writing that each of her works always has somethiThere is a freaking reason why Jewel E. Ann is my top fav author!!!
➺ She just has this magic in her writing that each of her works always has something unique in it that tops any other book I've read or will ever read. My favourite aspect of all her books is the way her titles come around to play such pivotal roles in the plot, the way each scene and word has meaning for her characters.
He stands, shrugging off his suit jacket. “You’re wearing a suit?” He loosens his tie. “I had to look the part.”
➺ Look The Part was just like this and what's more? The heroine Ellen is so freaking adorable, uncensored and a rat lady who calls her pet rats her "rat babies" (among which one named 'Gaga' who btw, likes to watch them having sex ;)) is obsessed with our hero in suits and let's not forget her constant need to adjust his tie.
“Good evening, Flint.” “You can call me Mr. Hopkins.” I push the button to the elevator. “Mmm, my landlord likes to role play. Me too.” I stiffen—everywhere—turning my gaze back over my shoulder. Ellen peeks her head around the corner and winks. I resist the urge to tug at my tie and scratch my neck. She’s flirting with me. Messing with me. Fucking with my head.
➺ This was a re-read after 2 years, and i have no memory of this book, (view spoiler)[to the point i forgot it has accidental pregnancy but don't worry, because if there is ever a time you want to try this in a book, this would be the perfect choice since (a) It happens late in the book so it's not the situation of "obligated to be here - must not love me in reality". (b) It is not secret pregnancy because she tells him asap. (c) It doesn't make much difference in terms of it just being revolving around the baby now. (hide spoiler)] and it just made me fall in love with it all over again not to mention this was FREAKING HILARIOUS like laugh-out-loud funny.
“I was just thinking about how incredibly sexy you look tangled in these sheets next to me and how hard it’s going to be to leave your bed. But then you said ‘rat babies,’ and my erection died."
➺ I have so much more to say, I want to paste all my highlighted quotes here but they are more like entire scenes and there's the fact that words escape me when I actually want to gush about a book in its review.
All I can say is, if you haven't tried Jewel E Ann yet, you're missing out the real deal in the romance genre. Anyways, I want to own the paperback now!
Her hands go right to my tie. By this point she might as well grab my dick since it’s now programmed to respond to her yanking my tie every which way
I nod and sniffle. “God … you sure do look the part, Flint Hopkins.” I grab the top to his jacket because he doesn’t have lapels to hold. He grins. “What part is that?” “My man, of course.”
So funny so funny so funny..realistic..hillarious..and did i say funny?.. I was full on laughing throughout the journey.. i never ever met someone in a So funny so funny so funny..realistic..hillarious..and did i say funny?.. I was full on laughing throughout the journey.. i never ever met someone in a book this real as Everly our heroine is...and so blunt .. hillarious .. our little stalker..and so real..
I originally read it back in 2020, with no records of the exact month or day. Since then, this is probably my 4thI read this at least once every year.
I originally read it back in 2020, with no records of the exact month or day. Since then, this is probably my 4th (might be more) time rereading it.
➺ This appears in one of those scarce billionaire romances (despite having read and possibly given high ratings to many, but we don't trust my pre-2022 self ;)) that I've completely cherished and adored. I would read it over and over again if I could. Since it was written in 2015, some parts are clichéd, of course—the usual, and now annoying, heroine who thinks "girls like me...," the FMC running away before talking to the H (don't worry though, it only lasted for two pages, leading to the start of a wonderful relationship), and that bitchy ex who meets her in the ladies' room, stuff like that. However, I have never disliked this story, even to this day, because the FMC is so adorable, and Chase's (H) nickname "Sunshine" for her couldn't be more accurate.
➺ My favorite part of her personality (which got me hooked from the first chapter) is her cute rambling and her penchant for blurting out an entire monologue of random things in life whenever she is nervous and in the presence of Chase. Their first encounter was such a freaking meet-cute and absolutely refreshing.
Gemma (H) is the kind of sunshine heroine I love to read about. Chase is the kind of billionaire whose money barely defines his personality, and it shows. When he chases a girl he wants, he doesn't need to take her on a helicopter ride to show off his money (unlike some mentally deranged billionaires out there). They are mature together and have one of those healthy adult relationships with never-ending hilarious moments between them that could really make you believe in love.
➺ It lacks in the spice department, but for some reason, whenever I read this, I hardly notice it. In fact, one of the things I love about this couple is their intimacy without sex. They never had sex until 65%, and the fact that they fell for each other before that was so refreshing. It also made all their physical intimate moments, specifically kissing (since it all started with a kiss, obviously ;)), even hotter. When they do actually sleep together, (in the euphemistic sense, because they slept together literally without sex before, and those were some pretty wholesome moments), I could see it wasn't written with the intention of being a smutty scene that would melt your panties. It was written in a way that would melt your heart and make you feel all mushy inside. It was described in a sweet, poetic manner to show how these two people fell more in love through sexual intimacy.
Not something I see everyday, so obviously I loved it :) I should go read a Jessa Kane book now. ...more
When my last read unexpectedly turned out to be a hilarious romance, I thought of re-reading one of my fav funny romances. This marks the 3rd time I hWhen my last read unexpectedly turned out to be a hilarious romance, I thought of re-reading one of my fav funny romances. This marks the 3rd time I have re-read this book ever since I read it three years ago. This book makes me feel like I should make a separate shelf for ''laugh-out-loud romances'' that I've came across because its already so rare to find. The enemies to lovers dynamic is never satisfying for me if I don't see humorous bickering. And nowadays its already hard to find a regular enemies-to-lovers without it including an alpha male dark brooding dude or just hate-to-love dynamic which is different.
Re-reading this also made me realize that at some point I have got to stop re-reading my fav books once I hit a certain mark because I'm reducing one star and changing the rating from 5 to 4 star and I hate it. Anyways, my reasoning for it, is : I can handle surprise pregnancy but what I have a problem is the secret pregnancy. I do believe it was worse in Tag and Ash's story (so not gonna reread that) but still it was there for a few good chapters. I've certainly evolved since when I first read it ig. Secret pregnancy isn't the sole reason for my change of heart. It's also because Bella's hypocrisy -and I say it with all my love because I adore this girl- on preaching about communication being the key to a healthy relationship, yet be the one to run and assume shit when things get rough.
I don't mind it much though because it only happens once but it got all combined with the secret pregnancy thing and that's just too much.
That aside, C.M Owens works are worth reading at least once. If you haven't tried her Sterling shore series, you're missing out on some pretty spectacular contemporary family romances where each standalone book have a different trope and are unique in their own way yet all connected through the family line and stuff!
C.M Owens could never do wrong in my eyes. The Mindfuck series under her pseudonym S.T Abby first introduced me to her books and writing style. I still cannot believe we have lost a phenomenal author and that she is gone.
Perfectly Toxic is one of the most hilarious book I've ever read. With Bella's autocorrect messages to her and Ethan's banter i always will remember one of the most hilarious and perfect couple written in the entire Sterling Shore series.
Whenever i need a good laugh, i always come back to this book...more