“I don’t know what’s worse: to not know what you are and be happy, or to become what you’ve always wanted to be, and feel alone.”
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I first read D“I don’t know what’s worse: to not know what you are and be happy, or to become what you’ve always wanted to be, and feel alone.”
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I first read Daniel Keyes' Flowers for Algernon in junior high school. At the time, I had no idea it was such a groundbreaking novel. Reading it again many years later, I'm not surprised that it is powerful, but I am surprised at just how complete the story is. There were parts of the story that stuck with me all these years: Charlie's belief that his life would be better if he were somehow more intelligent and the heartache of his return to his former condition.
It's difficult to verbalize why this regression should be so heartbreaking. Wasn't Charlie able to experience a life which somehow existed beyond his abilities (sort of like Lt. Barclay in Star Trek the Next Generation's "Nth Degree" episode)? Even if his newfound intelligence didn't last long, how long do any of us get to live at our full potential? Charlie's reclaiming of memories and relationships he forms after gaining intelligence make Charlie feel like a real character who, in spite of the odds, we are rooting for. Flowers for Algernon stays with you long after you finish it!
Merged review:
“I don’t know what’s worse: to not know what you are and be happy, or to become what you’ve always wanted to be, and feel alone.”
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I first read Daniel Keyes' Flowers for Algernon in junior high school. At the time, I had no idea it was such a groundbreaking novel. Reading it again many years later, I'm not surprised that it is powerful, but I am surprised at just how complete the story is. There were parts of the story that stuck with me all these years: Charlie's belief that his life would be better if he were somehow more intelligent and the heartache of his return to his former condition.
It's difficult to verbalize why this regression should be so heartbreaking. Wasn't Charlie able to experience a life which somehow existed beyond his abilities (sort of like Lt. Barclay in Star Trek the Next Generation's "Nth Degree" episode)? Even if his newfound intelligence didn't last long, how long do any of us get to live at our full potential? Charlie's reclaiming of memories and relationships he forms after gaining intelligence make Charlie feel like a real character who, in spite of the odds, we are rooting for. Flowers for Algernon stays with you long after you finish it!...more
On the meridian of time, there is no injustice: there is only the poetry of motion creating the illusion of truth and drama.”
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For a while as I rOn the meridian of time, there is no injustice: there is only the poetry of motion creating the illusion of truth and drama.”
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For a while as I read Henry Miller's Tropic of Cancer I wondered why it had appealed to me in my early twenties. Maybe it was allure of living as an artist in Paris or Miller's blatant disregard for conventions and authority. However, in the first section, it seemed like Miller only discussed whores or what he could get out of a woman. If not sex, some of them were good for "pin money." To be fair, it doesn't feel like Miller has real friendships with either men or women.
At some point, Miller began to broaden the reflection on his time in Paris and his own writing. He still reflected on the lifestyle of the starving artist in Paris; however, you get a sense he's searching for deeper meanings. It's not all smooth prose, but there are fragments that make you stop in your tracks. Perhaps that's something that Miller recognized; one of the quotes below is about how we should seek out books even if they only contain one great page. While I'm not sure I'm ready to wholeheartedly endorse this book as I may have as a younger reader, but I'm happy to have read it again with a different perspective.
“Words are loneliness.”
“I believe that today more than ever a book should be sought after even if it has only one great page in it. We must search for fragments, splinters, toenails, anything that has ore in it, anything that is capable of resuscitating the body and the soul.”
“Do anything, but let it produce joy. Do anything, but let it yield ecstasy.”
“I have found God, but he is insufficient.”...more
"You cannot be remade unless you are first broken."
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Steven Erikson is not content to stay in the world we became immersed in during the first bo"You cannot be remade unless you are first broken."
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Steven Erikson is not content to stay in the world we became immersed in during the first book of this series. Instead, in Deadhouse Gates, his characters are on the march through new places with even grimmer situations than before. It sometimes feels like they are stuck on a really bad road trip with mayhem and death at every turn (and some heart-wrenching deaths at that). Despite that, this is neither simplistic nor a glorification of violence. Deadhouse Gates presents a multi-layered story in the context of a history that is still writing itself out in the backdrop of both new and ancient civilizations. Am I hooked? I am certainly intrigued and will be be continuing the series with the next book, Memories of Ice. At some point as well, I'll be rereading this and perhaps understanding some of what I missed. ...more
“The veneration in which some people hold the gods says more about those people than about the gods”
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In a follow up to Sherlock Holmes and the S“The veneration in which some people hold the gods says more about those people than about the gods”
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In a follow up to Sherlock Holmes and the Shadwell Shadows, James Lovegrove's Sherlock Holmes and the Miskatonic Monstrosities continues Holmes and Watson's adventures battling the Elder Gods of the Cthulhu Mythos. Feeling a bit campy still, but I think that's part of the appeal. As their investigation took shape, I felt some momentum growing; however, a longish story inside the story told in the form of a journal, put the brakes on that. It had interesting bits and a sort of 'Heart of Darkness' feeling to it that matched well with the atmosphere already created, but its length, I think, disrupted the flow. Still, for the most part, this was a fun read. 3.25 stars...more
“Black seeds spill like clusters of eyes, wet and crying.”
“I’m practicing to be seen.”
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Based on a pivotal year in her own life, Thanhha Lai's Ins“Black seeds spill like clusters of eyes, wet and crying.”
“I’m practicing to be seen.”
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Based on a pivotal year in her own life, Thanhha Lai's Inside Out & Back Again follows the life of a young girl named Hà and her family. Quickly after the story opens, Saigon falls and they become refugees in Alabama. Hà's struggle to create a new life with her family in Alabama is told in the form of a diary. As a story about how immigrants cope with being part of a new culture while simultaneously being separated by it, there are no real surprises. However, I liked the way the story was told and the details Lai uses. Hà's difficulties with English and her references to how different it is from Vietnamese also resonated with me as I've been learning Vietnamese while preparing for a visit to Vietnam next month. Quick read with nice details. 3.75 stars ...more
“There's enough irony in my situation that a skilled blacksmith could turn it into a katana.”
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In Charles Stross's Escape from Yokai Land, Bob Ho“There's enough irony in my situation that a skilled blacksmith could turn it into a katana.”
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In Charles Stross's Escape from Yokai Land, Bob Howard returns for another Laundry Files mission, this time in Japan. For me, there were no laugh out loud moments in this novella, but I was smiling during much of my reading. I'm not sure how strong the plot was, I mostly just felt amused as Bob interacted with non-threatening yokai, looking like cats or penguins handing out flyers. A fun read! 3.75 stars...more
“It was a silly age, twenty-five; too old for teenaged dreaming, too young for settling down. Every corner was a possibility and a dead end.”
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Wh“It was a silly age, twenty-five; too old for teenaged dreaming, too young for settling down. Every corner was a possibility and a dead end.”
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While the drama of Toni Morrison's Tar Baby primarily unfolds on an isolated Caribbean island, thus creating the illusion of a community that is free from the dictates of a larger society, the characters are not in any way free from the attitudes imposed on them as well as a history of slavery. Outwardly, this novel feels less rooted in history than several other of Morrison's novels. However, Morrison masterfully shows that her characters are shaped by history, and almost predestined to behave in certain ways, even when they appear to have escaped it. The characters were not very sympathetic, but the story was compelling.
“I wonder if the person he wants to marry is me or a black girl? And if it isn't me he wants, but any black girl who looks like me, talks and acts like me, what will happen when he finds out that I hate ear hoops, that I don't have to straighten my hair, that Mingus puts me to sleep, that sometimes I want to get out of my skin and be only the person inside-- not American-- not black-- just me?”...more
I'm a huge fan of Kurt Vonnegut and Slaughterhouse-Five; I picked up Tom Roston's The Writer's Crus“Everything was beautiful and nothing hurt.”
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I'm a huge fan of Kurt Vonnegut and Slaughterhouse-Five; I picked up Tom Roston's The Writer's Crusade: Kurt Vonnegut and the Many Lives of Slaughterhouse-Five hoping to learn more about one of my favorite novels. While I enjoyed Roston's book, there wasn't really all that much new specifically about Vonnegut or the novel. Instead, Roston spends the majority of his book contextualizing Slaughterhouse-Five in the history and development of the public's understanding of PTSD. He also speculates about whether Vonnegut suffered PTSD from his well known experience at Dresden, something Vonnegut denied. For me, this did not bring a new perspective. Roston's book had begun with wilder speculation about Vonnegut hunting down one of his Nazi guards and how that changed Roston's own reading. I think continuing to follow this approach, the many ways Slaughterhouse-Five can be read, would have been a more engaging study. 3.25 stars ...more
“Give me what I want and you can have what you want, which includes my promise that I shall not hurt you, enchant you, or otherwise ruin your day.”
[im“Give me what I want and you can have what you want, which includes my promise that I shall not hurt you, enchant you, or otherwise ruin your day.”
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I'd already read Johannes Cabal the Necromaner when I picked up Johannes Cabal and the Blustery Day: And Other Tales of the Necromancer, a collection of seven short stories about our favorite necromancer. Some of the stories are quite good and reveal both the wit and the mindset of our title character who always wants to achieve his goals, regardless of how he goes about it. Usually it's in an entertaining way. I agree with other reviewers who place "A Long Spoon" as the standout story in this collection. What's not to like about Zarenyia? Fun read! ...more
“At the bottom of her heart, however, she was waiting for something to happen. Like shipwrecked sailors, she turned despairing eyes upon the solitude “At the bottom of her heart, however, she was waiting for something to happen. Like shipwrecked sailors, she turned despairing eyes upon the solitude of her life, seeking afar off some white sail in the mists of the horizon."
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Emma Bovary is a woman who inspires the passions of others, especially the passion of men who want to possess her. In Gustave Flaubert's Madame Bovary, it feels like Flaubert has given us the internal conflicts of a real and very complicated person. The work is an engaging read that sometimes feels like a romance, but more often feels like the psychological study of the book's heroine. I'm not sure I liked Emma Bovary, but that's definitely not the point. She exudes a palpable sense of disappointment with life that makes her vulnerable to those who want to control her, either through love or debt. Above all, though, she remains more complicated than the love affairs she engages in, her role as wife or mother or the tragedy that befalls her....more
“Why do we romanticize the dead? Why can't we be honest about them? Especially moms, they're the most romanticized of anyone."
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Pick up Jennette “Why do we romanticize the dead? Why can't we be honest about them? Especially moms, they're the most romanticized of anyone."
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Pick up Jennette McCurdy's I'm Glad My Mom Died for the title, stay for an amazing memoir! Going in, I didn't know much about either Jennette McCurdy or the world of child stars. There are some jaw-dropping moments about this world and her overbearing mother that are told in excruciating detail, but McCurdy relates them in a matter-of-fact way that really makes you reflect all the more about how McCurdy grew up. What becomes clear nearly from the onset is that she would do anything to make her mother happy. Her mother's desire for McCurdy to be a star overrode absolutely everything else. Engaging and sometimes darkly humorous read! 4.25 stars ...more
“It’s not having what you want, it’s wanting what you’ve got.”
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I hadn't listened to Sheryl Crow's music for some time, but that changed after I “It’s not having what you want, it’s wanting what you’ve got.”
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I hadn't listened to Sheryl Crow's music for some time, but that changed after I picked up Sheryl Crow: Words + Music. It just seemed like the right time and place for this to resonate with me. I like how Crow's story was matched with her music. I let it soak in. Most of Crow's story, and her having to start over a couple of times, was new to me. Maybe I was under a rock, but I didn't know she worked with Michael Jackson and after it was over started over again. None of the details make this book, however. What stands out for me is that the words and music resonated. 3.75 stars
“Your art kind of changes as you get older, by nature of the fact that you’re hopefully gaining wisdom and you’re starting to watch things with a better overview.”...more
“Which path do you intend to take, Nell?' said the Constable, sounding very interested. 'Conformity or rebellion?' Neither one. Both ways are simple-mi“Which path do you intend to take, Nell?' said the Constable, sounding very interested. 'Conformity or rebellion?' Neither one. Both ways are simple-minded - they are only for people who cannot cope with contradiction and ambiguity.”
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Neal Stephenson's The Diamond Age: Or, a Young Lady's Illustrated Primer was intriguing and entertaining. The primer reminded me of the encyclopedia that gives its name to Douglas Adams' The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy, but there's a lot more going on in this nearish-future steam punkesque adventure. I'm positive I didn't get everything, but I read it twice and it was fun both times. 4.25 stars...more
“He felt his flesh burning away, and his first thought was: I need that foot. I cannot allow it to burn.”
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Even though Will Wight's The Crimson V“He felt his flesh burning away, and his first thought was: I need that foot. I cannot allow it to burn.”
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Even though Will Wight's The Crimson Vault (Traveler's Gate, #2) is a continuation of the previous book (the action taking place a couple weeks after), the opening feels very abrupt, almost like I missed something. After the bumpy start, things settled down. More action than I feel is needed, but I like our traveler's world of Valinhall that Wight has created. There are also more connections to what's happening in the wider world that created tension for what comes next. 3.75 stars...more
“Sometimes my thoughts grow confused, and it is as if the forest has put down roots in me, and is thinking its old, eternal thoughts with my brain.”
[i“Sometimes my thoughts grow confused, and it is as if the forest has put down roots in me, and is thinking its old, eternal thoughts with my brain.”
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Marlen Haushofer's The Wall feels like a dystopian meditation channeling Henry David Thoreau's Walden (if Thoreau had been the lone survivor of mankind on Walden Pond) and sometimes the grittiness of Cormac McCarthy's The Road. I vacillated between really liking this and being intrigued by how our heroine was going to survive on her own and the feeling like it had already run its course. Still, an interesting read. 3.25 stars ...more
“I would not have traded the delights of my suffering for anything in the world.”
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The premise of Gabriel García Márquez's Memories of My Melanch“I would not have traded the delights of my suffering for anything in the world.”
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The premise of Gabriel García Márquez's Memories of My Melancholy Whores is distasteful. For his 90th birthday, the narrator procures the services of a 14-year old virgin. After only having had sex with whores, what he doesn't count on is falling in love with the young girl. As might be expected, but almost as disturbing, this love is equally twisted and disturbing. I'm not sure if Marquez achieved his objective in this work. Did he want to show the impossibility of real love after years of debauchery? Or living life to the fullest? Or simply the emptiness of life in general? It was difficult for me to figure that out, but it did have great writing and packed an emotional punch. 3.5 stars ...more
“Lovers and madmen have such seething brains Such shaping fantasies, that apprehend More than cool reason ever comprehends."
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One of William Shakes“Lovers and madmen have such seething brains Such shaping fantasies, that apprehend More than cool reason ever comprehends."
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One of William Shakespeare's most famous comedies, A Midsummer Night's Dream, delights in gorgeous language, clever plot twists, fairies and whimsy. I'd read this before, but it felt like the right time to get it out and read it again. While it doesn't have the emotional grip on the reader (or playgoer) that Hamlet, Henry II or several of his tragedies have, it was fun to revisit this and experience it again! 4.5 stars
“The death of a dream can be, in a way, sadder than that of a living being. Sometimes it all seems so unfair.”
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Haruki Murakami's First Person Si“The death of a dream can be, in a way, sadder than that of a living being. Sometimes it all seems so unfair.”
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Haruki Murakami's First Person Singular is collection of eight short stories told in the first person by a middle-aged man who reminisces about the past and, like Murakami himself, has an affinity for jazz and baseball. There is a clear blurring of fiction and memoir in a number of these stories that immediately made me take note. "Confessions of a Shinagawa Monkey" feels very Murikami from the outset as it posits a reality that competes with what we think is possible: “Thanks for the drinks,” the monkey said, and happily gulped the cold beer. I drank some as well. Honestly, it felt odd to be seated next to a monkey, sharing a beer, but I guess you get used to it."
In hindsight, the narrator briefly considers that this was an illusion. However, since the hotel where he was staying didn't know anything about the monkey, he decides it more likely that the monkey is an off the books employee. There is a twist at the end that adds even more credibility to this reality. Really enjoyed this story. I also liked "Cream." It combines the awkwardness of youth with a strange encounter that can't be explained. "On a Stone Pillow" might be my favorite. In that story, the narrator reminisces about a one night stand and whether it had any meaning. I also felt "Charlie Parker Plays Bossa Nova" was strong. Overall, a really solid collection of Murakami short stories that makes you ponder and also think about his novels. ...more
I would like to hear the words "public lands" spoken in every election debate, with candidates holding both government and corporations accountable inI would like to hear the words "public lands" spoken in every election debate, with candidates holding both government and corporations accountable in their oversight and use."
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In Erosion: Essays of Undoing, Terry Tempest Williams sounds like a visionary in the best sense of the word. She argues for a sane use of public lands with passion that is anchored in both the importance of the land and how it is being used, along with legislative efforts to protect public lands (and legislative setbacks during the Trump administration) . Erosion is also a memoir about family and purpose and coping with loss. Some of the last third of this collection (with the exception of her brother's suicide and cremation) feels a bit repetitive as Williams continues to deal with the politics surrounding a specific national park; however, this is such a timely and powerful work. I will be reading it again! ...more
Writing about time travel is, today, a respectable business. It hasn't always been so. After all, time travel, prima facie, appears to violate a fundaWriting about time travel is, today, a respectable business. It hasn't always been so. After all, time travel, prima facie, appears to violate a fundamental law of nature; every effect has a cause, with the cause occurring before the effect."
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Paul J. Nahin's Time Machine Tales: The Science Fiction Adventures and Philosophical Puzzles of Time Travel is a sort of science, philosophy and literature review on time travel and the nature of time. Nahin repeatedly cites scientific luminaries such as Einstein, Hawking and Newton and many, many others to explain what has been thought about this issue over the past few centuries. Nahin also explores the concept of linear time, causation and reverse causation and the fourth dimension in an attempt to ground the debates about time and time travel.
Nahin is most successful when he brings in literary sources. Of course, there's HG Wells, but there's also a plethora of pulp fiction that was written about time travel. And there is also a wide variety of pop culture references, various iterations of : Star Trek figure quite prominently. After many of the chapters, Nahin poses questions. One that I thought was interesting was just how you would convince someone you are a time traveler. Given the evidence that suggests it's not possible, could you even convince yourself? This work was sometimes dry and sometimes interesting. I just felt like I had to stick with it to get the good parts. 3.25 stars...more
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