The Wrong Box (1966)
Michael Caine: Michael Finsbury
Photos
Quotes
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[last lines]
Detective : All right, come on, come on, what's going on? Come on, what is it? Come on!
Clergyman : Please, sir, I beg of you, there's a dead man here.
Detective : All right, no one move!
[long pause while he realizes it's a church burial]
Detective : Finsbury?
Michael Finsbury , Julia Finsbury , Masterman Finsbury , Joseph Finsbury , Morris , John Finsbury : Yes?
Detective : MORRIS Finsbury!
John Finsbury : [turning Morris around and pointing at him] Yes.
Detective : Morris Finsbury, I arrest you for stealing £100,000.
Lawyer Patience : But the money has been returned, sir.
Detective : Who are you, sir? Some sort of accomplice?
Lawyer Patience : Certainly not: I am his solicitor.
Detective : Oh, you've brought your solicitor with you, have you? Yes, I've met your type before.
Lawyer Patience : No, no, no. I mean, I, I, I'm the administrator of the tontine.
Detective : Tontine?
Joseph Finsbury : Named after Lorenzo Tonti, a Neapolitan banker.
Detective : And who are you, sir?
Joseph Finsbury : I...
Masterman Finsbury : [interrupting] He's nobody. He's my young brother.
Detective : And who are you, sir?
Masterman Finsbury : None of your business, sir!
Detective : I shall have you arrested for indecent exposure!
Julia Finsbury : Oh!
Michael Finsbury : My grandfather was recently buried, sir.
Detective : And who are you, sir?
Julia Finsbury : He is Michael Finsbury.
Detective : And who are YOU, madam?
Michael Finsbury : She is Julia Finsbury, shortly to become... Julia Finsbury!
Detective : Young man, did you know there was a body in the piano?
Peacock : I did it.
Detective : Who is he?
Michael Finsbury : He is the butler, sir.
Detective : The butler did it?
Michael Finsbury : No, sir. I put the body there.
Detective : Is this true?
Michael Finsbury : Yes sir.
Detective : In that case, you are entitled to a reward of £1,000. You are responsible for bringing the Bournemouth Strangler to his just end.
Michael Finsbury : A, a thousand pounds? Oh, but I-I-I don't, I don't deserve it. The body just arrived in a barrel.
John Finsbury : I sent it.
Detective : And who are you, sir?
Morris Finsbury : He is of diminished responsibility, officer. It was all my doing. If there's any justice in this naughty world, the reward is mine.
Detective : And WHO are YOU?
[falls into open grave]
Morris Finsbury : You remember me - Morris Finsbury. I was falsely accused of stealing a hundred thousand pounds, whereas in fact it was me, and me alone, who was responsible for bringing the Bournemouth Strangler to his just desserts.
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Michael Finsbury : I never knew my parents. They were killed in a balloon ascension.
Julia Finsbury : Well, I only knew mine vaguely. My father was a missionary. He was eaten by his Bible class.
Michael Finsbury : Your mother?
Julia Finsbury : She too. They never eat one without the other.
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Peacock : How's your grandfather this morning?
Michael Finsbury : He says he's dying, Peacock.
Peacock : Oh, he always says that.
Michael Finsbury : But Peacock, he wants to see his brother Joseph...
Peacock : He must be dying.
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Masterman Finsbury : Now, you're to go to Joseph and tell him I want to see him.
Michael Finsbury : Yes sir. But won't that upset you sir?
Masterman Finsbury : Upset me? Of course it'll upset me. But nothing will upset me more than not winning the tontine and leaving you with a mountain of debts and a doubtful future as an idiot in a profession of rogues and charlatans.
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Julia Finsbury : So, that's where you go every morning. I see you often, through the window.
Michael Finsbury : Oh, what an extraordinary coincidence. I look at you through the window.
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Peacock : What shall we do, Master Michael? What shall we do?
Michael Finsbury : There's only one thing to do, Peacock. We must inform the police.
Peacock : But your grandfather's good name, sir?
Michael Finsbury : I shall say I did it.
Peacock : No. I am an old man. Let me say I did it.
Michael Finsbury : What was your motive?
Peacock : Money!
Michael Finsbury : They'd never believe you.
Peacock : And why not sir? After all, I haven't been paid for seven years. Begging your pardon, sir.
Michael Finsbury : No, Peacock. It's a noble gesture, but I shall plead guilty to the crime.
Peacock : But think of your career, sir. You have your whole life before you.
Michael Finsbury : Yes, there is that, of course. Well, we must think of something else, then.
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Michael Finsbury : [reading a telegram that has just been delivered] It's from Lady Pitman. She's sending back that statue we sent her. Says it's a fraud... *Was* it a fraud, Peacock?
Peacock : Life is a fraud, Master Michael.
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Julia Finsbury : I've always wanted an empty room of my own. Ours are so cluttered.
Michael Finsbury : Oh, we have lots of empty rooms. Would you like to see another one?
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Morris Finsbury : I know you are a medical student, cousin, so I need hardly remind you that blood is thicker than water.
Michael Finsbury : Yes. Five times as, I believe.
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Michael Finsbury : My grandfather is dying.
Julia Finsbury : Oh. I'm so sorry!
Michael Finsbury : Oh, it's nothing serious!