Wife Asking Husband for a 'Postnup' After Secret Child Revelation Backed

Finances can be tricky for engaged couples to negotiate, but what happens when these negotiations happen after marriage?

A post to Reddit's "Am I The A******?" (AITA) forum on Wednesday has gone viral after a woman shared that she was seeking a postnuptial agreement in light of the revelation that her husband has a daughter. Since the post was made by u/One_Sun_2607, it has received 4,600 upvotes.

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"Recently, my husband's ex from high school showed up saying they had a child together 13 years ago and their daughter now wants to get to know him," the original poster (OP) wrote on Reddit. "They were already broken up when she found out she was pregnant and since she wanted to go to medical school, her parents offered to take care of the baby, but apparently banned her from telling my husband."

The revelation shocked both the OP and her husband—and she wrote that while she was supportive of him developing a relationship with his daughter, she had some concerns about finances.

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"I came into this marriage with more assets, I earn more than him and financial stability is very important to me. The thought of something happening to him and losing part of my assets to his child terrifies me," she wrote. "Sharing everything with my husband never bothered me before, because that's part of marriage, but him suddenly having a daughter is not what I signed up for."

Two months later, the OP asked for a postnuptial agreement, making her husband upset at the request, which he felt was ill-timed. He told her it seemed like she was preparing to divorce him. Despite her husband's complaints and another friend who offered similar feedback, the OP was resolute. "I think I'm justified in wanting a postnup," she wrote.

Reddit users largely agreed with the OP in the comments section.

"Your husband now has financial and blood inheritance complications that you didn't know about going into the marriage," one user commented. "The potential fate of your assets are not what you signed up for."

"This is also life changing for you. A teenager who's probably struggling herself is dropped into the middle of your life. This is hard for you," another user wrote. "You brought it up two months after the fact, not the day of. She isn't your financial responsibility and shouldn't become yours."

Newsweek has reached out to u/One_Sun_2607 for comment via Reddit.

What Is a 'Postnup' and When Should You Get One?

Newsweek asked Derek Jacques, a family law attorney and owner of The Mitten Law Firm, what the circumstances for a "postnup" are and when a married couple might consider one. He said the OP in this case is justified in asking for such an agreement in light of the revelation.

"A postnuptial agreement would essentially lay out the division of assets should the couple get divorced," Jacques said. "With the introduction of a biological child that was conceived outside of the marriage, it makes sense for the wife in this particular instance to ask for one."

Not only did it make sense, he said, but the postnuptial agreement was made for situations exactly like this.

"The 'postnup' was designed for instances like this, where the couple has no knowledge of something, and it suddenly impacts the financial situation of the marriage," Jacques said. "A sudden windfall due to inheritance is another instance where a 'postnup' may be beneficial. While the husband in this case has every right to feel upset, it is understandable that the wife would ask for this given the sudden change in circumstances two months into their marriage."

Jacques said that, especially if the couple ends up having their own children together, a postnuptial agreement would be helpful if they decided to eventually divorce.

"The husband may use the existence of this child to seek spousal support, as the daughter's needs might be an expense taken into account by the court," he added.