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My husband would rather attend ‘boring’ work parties, than spend time with me
DEAR DEIDRE: My husband moans about his work annual summer party every year. He says it’s boring and full of tedious people and yet he still insists on going.
I’m convinced he goes simply to get away from me for a few days.
I know there are a lot of women who work at his company and even though I don’t think he’d cheat, I’m not entirely comfortable.
I’ve encouraged him to stay at home, if it’s that bad, but he always goes in the end.
I am 52 and my husband is 54. I think he enjoys going to escape and then talks it down so that I don’t get insecure and jealous.
Now that our kids have left home, I’m often left kicking around the house and wish he’d spend more time with me.
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DEIDRE SAYS: If it is a work event he may feel obliged to go. I’m afraid to say it is likely that your insecurity is causing the problem.
Overthinking often begins from a lack of trust so rebuilding this in your relationship will help to relieve the anxiety.
It is important for you and your husband to spend quality time together, talk to one another openly and honestly to help rebuild your trust.
But it’s also important that you both have your own individual identity and interests so that you both bring something to the relationship.
So think of a new interest or activity to fill your time if you are left feeling lonely at home often.
My support pack Looking After Your Relationship will help.