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SIX months ago Ekin-Su Cülcüloğlu walked into the Celebrity Big Brother house with her profile rocketing.
She’d just jetted back from the States where she filmed the reunion episode of The Traitors US.
But two weeks later, the winner of Love Island 2022 (with then-boyfriend Davide Sanclimenti) became the fourth person to be evicted from the CBB house, after the other housemates accused her of being fake and playing a role.
She left to jeers and boos, and was so upset by the reaction that she didn’t attend the final.
“I felt like my career was over,” she confides. “I was getting death threats. I told my family I had been cancelled, packed a bag and left the country.”
But rather than blaming others, the almost-30-year-old has spent the last few months in therapy.
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“I made a wrong decision to go in there and I know that,” she says.
“But as much as Celebrity Big Brother was bad for me, I need to take ownership of how I was. I didn’t do enough research and didn’t expect it to be so intense.
“I arrived jet-lagged with no sleep. I wasn’t in the right headspace and I admit I wasn’t myself. I didn’t speak to anyone about Davide cheating on me – I was lying to everybody about my mindset, but the public could see I wasn’t being honest. They were right saying that I was fake.”
So what went wrong? “There were moments where I was defensive, especially when anyone talked about Davide, Love Island or OnlyFans.”
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Ekin-Su won Love Island alongside Davide, 29, with the highest-ever percentage of the vote.
They dated for 18 months and even landed their own reality show, but the relationship wasn’t plain sailing and the Italian was accused of cheating with an OnlyFans model.
“Everything felt linked to him. My anger was for him, not the [CBB] housemates. I don’t have any issues with people who do OnlyFans, but it just hit a nerve with me. People try to rile you every day. They saw me as a weak target. I was so vulnerable.”
After the amazing reaction she got to winning Love Island, leaving the house to boos must have been devastating.
“I was shocked when they called my name [to evict me] and the booing didn’t help. I already felt insecure going in and then I heard that. It wasn’t good for me.”
‘Without the cheers, I was nothing’
She then appeared on the spin-off show Big Brother: Late And Live, where she was grilled by a celebrity panel.
Strictly star Layton Williams was harsh, blasting her with: “Don’t blame it on the edit. We see what we see,” while show co-presenter Will Best dubbed her “Ekin Boo Hoo Hoo”.
More than 130 people complained to Ofcom about her treatment on the show.
“I was a huge fan of Layton,” Ekin-Su says.
“I was so disappointed in him. He knew what it was like to be bullied on Strictly. I kept thinking: ‘What have I ever done to you?’ People were so angry with me and AJ Odudu and Will Best were encouraging them to boo me. Yes, I own how I was, but there was no need to turn on me.”
Having done four reality shows – Love Island, Dancing On Ice, The Traitors US and Celebrity Big Brother – Ekin-Su realises more than most that she’s at the mercy of how producers edit her.
Much like Joey Essex, who recently hit out at ITV producers over the way his time on Love Island was played out on screen.
She nods. “I know Joey well, as we did Dancing On Ice together. He looked after everyone on the show and was so nice. Everyone knew he was in [Love Island] to spice things up and that’s what happened. I have nothing bad to say about him.”
If she could do it over again, would she still go into the CBB house?
“I made mistakes,” she admits. “I have a lot of regrets. I wish I had never gone on [the show]. I wanted to prove to people that I could do something without my ex and it backfired.
“My self-worth is ingrained in my work and external validation from others. So when the public hated me, I hated myself. Without the cheers, I was nothing and it was then I realised that I have to change. I have to learn to give myself the love that I seek from other people.”
She wasn’t cancelled as she had feared, and her career definitely wasn’t over.
In fact, she is set to jet off to LA in September to rub shoulders with Hollywood’s finest at The Emmys, where The Traitors US is up for four awards.
She’ll be partying alongside fellow nominees Ryan Gosling, Jennifer Aniston and Reese Witherspoon, so it’s no surprise Ekin-Su’s pals have nicknamed her “The Comeback Kid”.
“I’ll be going: ‘Can I get a selfie?’ I’m going to be fangirling. I’ll be trying to find Brad Pitt. Is he single?” she laughs. “Maybe my future husband will be at the Emmys drinking a cosmo.”
My relationship with Davide was toxic and left a lot of scars.
The star has also planned a month-long trip around the States, where she will be having meetings about potential work opportunities.
“I can’t wait to catch up with everyone. I loved doing The Traitors US so much. We all clicked and stayed friends. I meet up with John Bercow [the former Speaker of the House of Commons] for coffee all the time.
"As well as meeting lovely people, it was a wake-up call for me to walk away from my relationship with Davide [they were together while filming]. I lay in a coffin, which was traumatising [Ekin-Su was a “faithful” who was “buried alive” during a task], but it made me think about how short life is. I knew I couldn’t be with him any more.
“One night, I had a weird gut feeling that Davide had cheated on me. One of the psychologists on the show said: ‘You need to let go of this relationship and get out. Look what he’s doing to you.’ And they were right. It was really damaging me.”
Ekin-Su and Davide originally split in June 2023 after a year together, but quickly reunited. Then, in January 2024, following her stint on the reality show stateside, they broke up for good.
“I’m glad it’s over,” she says. “I wish I’d ended it last April when there were more allegations of cheating. I knew it was true but I covered for him. I wish I had said: ‘F**k it!’ and left because he continued cheating. I gave him a lot. I know people think I’m probably not over him, but I can talk about him like this because I am healing.
“It was a toxic relationship that left a lot of emotional scars, but it’s all about looking forward now, and enjoying life. I wish Davide nothing but happiness.”
Is she looking for a new love?
“I’ve got my sparkle back. I know there’s light at the end of the tunnel, but the light is me, and not in the shape of a man.”
It’s a relief to hear. In her first book Be Your Own Best Friend, she has opened up about how she’s been treated badly in controlling relationships. One of her exes hacked her phone and blackmailed her, threatening to release private pictures.
Ekin-Su says: “I met a guy on Tinder. It was too good to be true. He’d pick me up in fancy cars for nights out and bought me gifts. He took me to a hotel and there was a dress for me to wear – it was like Pretty Woman. Total love-bombing. Then my phone was stolen on a night out.
“He gave me a new limited-edition iPhone. It should have been a red flag that it wasn’t in the box, but I was thinking: ‘He’s spoiling me, he loves me.’
“I’d had the phone for two months and then I got a really weird email to my work address. I was working an admin job at a finance company at the time. It said: ‘I know everything about you.’ I thought it must be spam but they had attached a picture of me wearing lingerie that I had sent to my ex.
"I tried to ignore it, but the emails kept coming and one said: ‘If you don’t reply I’m going to email this friend with a private chat you’ve had about them behind their back.’ And things like: ‘I saw you scratch your head. I know where you get your lunch.’ It was really weird stuff.
“I told a former boyfriend as we were still close and I trusted him, and we spoke to the police. They said: ‘Have you met anyone new? Have they given you gifts?’ Of course it was that guy. I felt so silly.
“The stalker had been threatening me with intimate pictures I’d taken. It was basically revenge porn, but the police couldn’t do anything. The IP wasn’t trackable. I had to delete my phone, iCloud and emails.
“When I went on Love Island, they asked me if anything could come up and I thought something might surface but nothing did, thankfully. But I still worry now that stuff might come out.”
It’s no surprise that Ekin-Su isn’t keen to rush into another relationship.
“I was really traumatised,” she admits.
“Now I look for signs and I cut people out early. I need to protect myself. But I am enjoying single life at the moment. I have been dating and I’m on Raya, but I’ve always gone from one relationship to another, so now it’s about learning what I want and need in a partner before I settle down.
"I want to meet somebody who aligns with my values. I know I can rush into things, and I’m trying to break that cycle of me dating the same type of man.”
I still look in the mirror and think: 'Oh god, I want to change this'
It’s clear from reading Ekin-Su’s book, which is half-autobiographical, half-advice, that she is really trying to love herself.
“When I was young, I wished I had a big sister to give me advice,” she says. “This book is for girls who feel the same. I still look in the mirror and go: ‘Oh god, I want to change this.’ I never think: ‘I look great’.
"That’s why sometimes I have been guilty of editing my photos. I want the ‘likes’ for validation but I know it needs to come from within. I’m still evolving and everything in my life, even the bad stuff, teaches me things.”
So what’s next for Ekin-Su? Could we see her back in the villa in January for Love Island: All Stars?
“Sure, if they paid me £5million,” she laughs.
“I love Love Island but Big Brother scarred me and I’d worry about being cast as the villain. Plus, I don’t think I’d have a chance of winning it again. And I’d be scared of Davide being there, too. I’d be saying: ‘This man is a cheat, a liar and an actor!’ Forget Love Island, it would be more like an episode of EastEnders!”
- Be Your Own Best Friend by Ekin-Su Cülcüloğlu (£20, Piatkus) is out August 29 and available to pre-order now.
Ekin-Su’s letter to her 10-year-old self
Here, she writes about the struggles she’ll face – and overcome – to become the woman she is today…
I understand how you have struggled with moving to Essex, giving up dancing, the bullying at school, and being on your own at home. It’s a lot for a child to deal with, and you’re so brave and strong. I am really proud of you for holding your head up high and finding ways to be happy in your own company. You won’t always find this so easy – you’ll look to others for comfort and happiness.
You have faith that your life will turn out to be amazing, despite all the difficult things you’re experiencing. In some ways, your life will become more incredible than you ever imagined. You may not be liked by people at school, but soon you’ll be liked by millions of people around the world!
There are so many exciting things to look forward to. But also, you’ll discover that life isn’t perfect all the time. Sadly, people who are supposed to love you will hurt you. But every person who comes into your life is there for a reason – to teach you something. The bad relationships will be hard, but they’re just stepping stones until you get to where you’re meant to be.
I know you feel insecure about how you look, especially when you see “beautiful” girls who look nothing like you. Over the years, you will try and change with dieting, make-up, fillers and surgery that will leave physical scars. I understand why you want that, but you are beautiful, exactly as you are.
Being “different” might feel like a problem to you, but when you’re older, being unique will be much more celebrated. Of course, you’ll change and grow as you get older – but always hold on to what makes you who you are.
You will make mistakes and bad decisions, but you’ll come back even braver and stronger. I’m sorry that I haven’t always been the best friend to you. I have reaffirmed other people who have told you that you’re not good enough, not pretty enough and not cool enough. I have said those words to you as well, and I apologise for being so mean.
You don’t have to be perfect in order to be loved.
I love you, Ekin-Su xxx
Text copyright © Ekin-Su Cülcüloğlu.