Sex tapes or no sex tapes, you’ve got to think the whole sorry Jeffrey Epstein saga stinks to high heaven
THE Epstein files have left a lot of people with squeaky bums and sweaty armpits.
Much as we’d love to believe that Prince Andrew, Richard Branson and Bill Clinton — he likes them young, allegedly — appeared in secretly recorded sex tapes at Jeffrey Epstein’s lair and that former US President Donald Trump adores pert nipples, some of the claims just seem a bit outrageous.
Add in the fact that in 2016 the woman who detailed the lurid allegations — Epstein victim Sarah Ransome — retracted them all in an email to a columnist with the New York Post, and you gotta be thinking this whole thing stinks to high heaven.
She wrote at the time: “I would like to retract everything I have said to you and walk away from this.”
But on Tuesday she came out again to claim the sex tapes DO EXIST. She’s like the Chuckle Brothers — to me, to you . . .
They do exist, they don’t exist, they do exist.
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Case closed, surely?
But in this modern world of ours, where most people have the attention span of a gnat, the truth can sometimes get lost in translation.
And in the meantime the reputations of those named have been severely damaged. That’s human nature.
The newly-unsealed emails from Ransome are part of a court filing by a firm representing Epstein’s former lawyer, Alan Dershowitz. They’re meant to show that Ransome “manifestly lacks credibility”.
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I think he’s achieved that with oceans to spare.
Ransome had claimed she was forced to have sex with Dershowitz, who denies the allegations and says he has never met her.
Ransome’s claims of alleged “sex tapes” took the world by storm this week. Plastered on every front page.
Here’s what Ransome says in her own words about those “tapes”. You make up your own mind.
She wrote: “When my friend had sexual intercourse with Clinton, Prince Andrew and Richard Branson, sex tapes were in fact filmed on each separate occasion by Jeffrey.”
Mmmm. But did all of this really happen?
Are Ransome’s claims of the fantastical variety — Alison In Wonder-land stuff — or to be taken at face value and accepted as true?
Social media cesspit
The cesspit that is social media has disabled our ability to even question the reliability of what we see and read.
Either way, one thing is for sure — rightly or wrongly, these tapes have discredited the rich and famous.
So, when you think of Bill Clinton right now, the first things that come to mind are not his sterling effort bringing peace to the island of Ireland in the late Nineties, nor his success in driving down child poverty in the US?
I’d wager that when you conjure up an image of Clinton, the first thing you see is Monica Lewinsky and what she likes to do with one of Bill’s cigars, allegedly.
After this week, you’re going to think he has a sex fetish for the younger woman, too.
Never mind all the great things he did in politics. Bill is a sex addict.
Similarly, when you now ponder the Virgin entrepreneur Richard Branson, you’re not going to think of his work exploring space or beating the land-speed record, or even his firm’s super-fast broadband.
Nope, you are going to produce in your mind an image of him in a bedroom being recorded having it off with one of monster Epstein’s sex slaves.
'Video doesn't exist'
A video which doesn’t exist. If it does, I’m Charlie Chaplin
Prince Andrew, too. Lights aren’t really on and no one is home, for the most part, but the latest revelations that he too was secretly filmed getting jiggy by Epstein have stuck.
There is one claim, among those Ransome has outlined, that for many will ring true. It’s the one concerning former US President Donald Trump.
That’s because Trump has a history with women. Not a very nice one, either.
In one paragraph, Ransome tells the world her Trump tale.
She writes: “Another friend confided in me about her casual ‘friendship’ with Donald. Mr Trump definitely seemed to have a thing for her and she told me how he kept going on about how he likes her ‘pert nipples’.”
She then goes on to describe in graphic detail what Trump liked to do with said nipples.
'Baseless' claims
Use your imagination.
Trump, for his part, through his spokesman Steven Cheung, said Ransome’s claims about the former US President were “baseless”.
As did a spokesman for Richard Branson, who said: “We can confirm that Sarah Ransome’s claims are base-less and unfounded.”
Bill Clinton has kept his counsel. As have the royals.
Probably right to remain schtum when confronted by this.
Better not to dignify this week’s claims with any response.
CURB THE PROPERTY VULTURES
THE Government’s housing strategy has many holes in it, chief among them its unwillingness to stop international investment funds from buying up newly-built houses and renting them out at extortionate prices.
A couple of years back, one such vulture fund sought to buy up EVERY home in a 135-property development in Maynooth, Co Kildare.
Such was the outrage, the Government introduced a measure to hit funds with increased stamp duty of ten per cent should they buy ten or more homes in any given year.
Except it hasn’t worked. It hasn’t deterred the vultures from buying up everything in sight and leaving ordinary buyers out in the cold.
Recently, an investment fund bought 46 out of 54 homes on a new housing estate in Balbriggan, north Dublin.
These are now advertised for rent at up to €3,175 a MONTH, earning the fund €38,100 per house — €1,752,600 for the 46 homes they got their hands on.
The stamp duty measure the Government thought would deter the vulture funds is a dead duck. It hasn’t worked.
And it must be ditched for something far tougher. We can’t allow private investment funds to dictate the rental market. Sort it, lads.
GOVT CUT PAYMENT FOR UKRAINIANS
WE’VE taken in more than 104,000 Ukrainian refugees since the Russian war began almost two years ago. A staggering number, given the size of Ireland’s population.
All were given free accommodation and adults were entitled to a weekly jobseeker’s payment of €232 — very generous by EU standards.
Upwards of 500 Ukrainians a week are coming to Ireland. The payments to them were clearly unsustainable, and out of kilter with what the rest of Europe provides to Ukrainian refugees, so something had to give.
The Cabinet has decided the €232 payment will cease within weeks for new arrivals, who will be given State accommodation for 90 days only and a weekly payment of €38.80.
This will reduce the numbers seeking shelter here quite considerably, because many were coming because of the great handouts.
THREAT OF COVID NOT OVER
COVID is everywhere again. But no one gives a fiddler’s about the disease any more.
Nobody wears a mask — even those who are sick with the virus don’t bother their arse covering up.
The buses are thronged, all the windows closed. The nightspots are wedged, creating giant Covid pits.
Even in the hospitals, where you’d think they’d be more knowledgeable about Covid and what it can do to the body, masks are nowhere to be seen, save for a few older people terrified of catching the virus and ending up dead.
Nobody wants to go back to the pandemic, and the time of lockdowns. That miserable memory has been thrown in the dustbin of history.
No, it’s full gas back to normal. To hell with Covid. It doesn’t strike fear into anyone any more.
Except that we should be cautious. We should be wary about the virus. Because, it hasn’t gone away. It will stalk the vulnerable among us, prey on those who haven’t been vaccinated, get through the defences of those yet to be boosted.
Of those who catch the new JN.1 variant, some 20 per cent will go on to develop long Covid symptoms. Those who already suffer with long Covid can expect their symptoms to worsen through re-infection.
But for most of us, that truth will go in one ear and out the other.
DUBLIN HAS A LONG WAY TO GO
DUBLIN is safe, the Government keeps parroting. No, it’s not. It’s like something out of a zombie movie after dark.
It’s become more threatening, dirty and derelict since the pandemic, and scumbags now rule the streets.
Empty office blocks and too many hotels are testament to a failure of national policy when it comes to the capital.
It needs a directly elected mayor with power as a start. But it has far to go before it becomes a place to be proud of like it used to be.
IT'S WOOF JUSTICE
I ATE dog once. Tasted like strong chicken, but had me retching with every mouthful as an image of fluffy Rex was at the forefront of my mind throughout.
My dog dinner happened in 2002 during the Japan/Korea football World Cup.
I was there as a news reporter and dined on a bit of ruff so I could go on radio and tell the late great shock jock Gerry Ryan all about it on RTE 2FM.
Except, I never made it on air. I was as sick as a dog the next day — probably from all the booze, not the mutt — and spent most of the day on the throne, or in bed, head turned towards an improvised bucket.
Ah, memories. I was brought back to my dog feast after reading that South Korea has decided to BAN the market and sale of dog meat.
About time. Under the new law, anyone who butchers dogs for human consumption could face three years in prison or a fine of €30,000.
Dogs aren’t meant to be eaten, they’re meant to be loved and walked and stroked and spoiled. You don’t chow down on pets. Unless you’re a madman, like I once was.