RUPERT

@JK Rowling. Labour literally can’t define what a woman is. What’s the plan, lift up random objects until you find one? What does that even mean?

JO

Well, darling, in my day, women had these things called vaginas and men had these things called penises --

EMMA

These are terrible things to say, Jo. And terribly cruel.

JO

The sands of cruelty have shifted so quickly I can hardly keep track. For example, it used to be cruel to stab loved ones in the back but it seems to be quite acceptable these days.

RUPERT

We didn’t stab you in the back --

JO

True, it was more of a full-body evisceration.

DANIEL

So when you express your opinions it’s free speech but when we do it’s evisceration.

JO

No, when you do it’s capitalization.

EMMA

We had a responsibility to the trans community --

JO

You had a responsibility to me! F---ing me!