Brewers
Milwaukee
The Milwaukee Brewers are why small-market baseball is dying
How much money is $750,000 to a baseball team, hm? According to Spotrac, the Milwaukee Brewers have already determined the 2023 salaries for 20 of their players. All of them will be earning more than $1 million. Given that MLB rosters can consist of 26 people, we can say that, at most, six Brewers w...
What exactly were the Brewers thinking?
Amidst all the hullabaloo following the Juan Soto trade (Nationals are officially a poverty franchise now, by the way), the Padres’ deal for Josh Hader has been brushed aside, tucked under the rug, becoming an afterthought. It was one of the most surprising trades of the deadline. Nobody expected th...
So is Christian Yelich dead?
The Milwaukee Brewers, probably the playoff team that everyone thought about the least, bit the dust yesterday in a fashion befitting a team that most didn’t realize were even there. They scored six runs across four games, got shutout twice, and while maybe not quite a whimper thanks to the dramatic...
Devin Williams to miss postseason for dumbest of reasons
In the dumbest injury at the worst time department, we’d like to announce Brewers reliever Devin Williams as this year’s recipient....
Wisconsin GOP tries to grill Racing Sausages, but they’re gonna get burned
The Wisconsin Republican Party is very good at manipulating the rules of democracy. They’ve gerrymandered the hell out of the state to the point that despite Democrats earning a majority of the votes in the 2018 legislative elections, Republicans won 63 of the 99 seats....
2020 NL Central Preview
The NL Central is the rare occurrence in modern-day Major League Baseball where an argument could be made for four teams to win it. Or, to put it more accurately in today’s context, only one team has actively given up and merely exists to siphon off revenue-sharing and BAMTech money while causing it...
Trent Grisham Isn't Going To Forget This One For A While
Trent Grisham, welcome to October. The 22-year-old midseason call-up, who was such a big part of the Brewers’ postseason push, especially after Christian Yelich went down, learned quickly and the hard way that the reason the crowds are bigger and louder is that every play’s import is magnified, and ...
Nationals Eliminate Brewers Thanks To Brutal, Brutal Outfield Error
The Milwaukee Brewers had it. They had it! For seven-plus innings, their pitchers successfully shut the Nationals down with a steady diet of high heat, and preserved a two-run lead that started to feel like 50 or 100 runs as the game progressed. The Brewers got to Josh Hader in the bottom of the eig...
Lorenzo Cain Put On A Damn Show, Bad Leg And All<i></i><i></i>
Milwaukee Brewers center fielder Lorenzo Cain entered Saturday’s vital game in Colorado with an already-busted leg, nursing both a left ankle and a left knee injury. But with the Brewers in a tight race against the dreaded St. Louis Cardinals for the National League Central crown, Cain not only suit...
Some Pitchers You Probably Forgot About Are Carrying The Brewers To The Postseason
Reigning MVP Christian Yelich was lost for the season after taking a foul ball to the knee two weeks ago, but the Milwaukee Brewers didn’t collapse in their quest to make the playoffs for the second year in a row. To the contrary, they shook off the loss of their best player and surged down the stre...
What Are The Brewers Without Christian Yelich?
In his first at-bat in an eventual Brewers win against the Marlins on Tuesday night, reigning NL MVP and 2019 MVP frontrunner Christian Yelich fouled a pitch off his right knee and fell to the ground in what looked like excruciating pain. The Brewers right fielder left the game, and not long after, ...
Christian Yelich Fractures Kneecap With Foul Ball, Is Done For The Season
Well, this blows. The Milwaukee Brewers are very much in the hunt for the second National League Wild Card spot, trailing the Cubs by just a game and a half. But their pursuit from this point on will no longer include the services of reigning NL MVP Christian Yelich, who has been ruled out for the ...
Christian Yelich Changes Walkup Music To Own A Random Twitter User
Reigning National League MVP Christian Yelich will appear in the upcoming ESPN Body Issue, the worldwide leader’s annual effort to capitalize on everyone’s desire to see the bare butt-cheeks of attractive famous people. The Body Issue is 10 years old now—no one who is not hoarding survival gear in ...
The Kids At This Pirates Game Are Absolutely Out Of Control
The Milwaukee Brewers are on the road and blowing out the Pirates tonight, so it can’t be an especially fun night to be a young Pittsburgh fan at the ballpark. But oh my goodness gracious, Generation Z is misbehaving all over the outfield during this game. Hopped up on dingers and who knows what els...
Derek Dietrich Is Still Not Giving Up The Inside Corner
In the top of the fifth against the Brewers, Reds second baseman Derek Dietrich got hit in the elbow by a 71 mph changeup from Alex Claudio. It was the sixth time that a Brewers pitcher had hit Dietrich with a pitch in three games, setting an MLB record for most times a player has been hit in a seri...
Reds' Jesse Winker Goes Ass Over Teakettle To Turn A Double Into A Triple
With one out in the top of the second inning of yesterday’s Reds-Brewers game, Cincinnati’s Jesse Winker smoked a loopy Jimmy Nelson breaking ball on a hard line past center fielder Lorenzo Cain and all the way to the wall. It was a double, easily. Was it a triple? Only for a madman. A madman like J...
Brewers Utility Man Hernán Pérez Pitches Delightful, YouTube-Inspired 1-2-3 Inning
Normally I would not ask you to pay attention to a late half-inning in a 16–0 June blowout, where pretty much by definition nothing that happens matters in the slightest. This is no normal half-inning! First of all the pitcher is Brewers utility man Hernán Pérez, making his second appearance on the ...
Help Me Figure Out Which Team Scored 11 Runs In One Inning In Marlins-Brewers
The Miami Marlins opened a series against the Milwaukee Brewers Tuesday night, in Milwaukee. The Brewers come into the series sitting atop the NL Central; the last-place, aggressively “rebuilding” Marlins come into the series having scored the fewest total runs in baseball and 35 fewer runs than the...
Aaron Rodgers Loses Chugging Contest Among Milwaukee-Area Sportsmen
Since the Toronto Raptors have Drake cheering them on, the Milwaukee Bucks need their own celebrity row. Green Bay lineman David Bakhtiari has filled a spot more than once, and he’s excelled at acting as a Rally Packer for the crowd. All he has to do is chug beers, and the crowd gets fired up....
Mets Fan Accidentally Showers Ryan Braun With Overpriced Beer
Mets first baseman Pete Alonso was smashing things pitches early on Sunday against the Brewers. In the bottom of the first, he sent a fastball deep into left field and forced Ryan Braun to try and track it down by the wall. Thinking it was going over, Braun made an attempt at a leaping catch but was...