Ted Cruz Slams “Punk” Jimmy Kimmel After Late Night Host Calls Him “A Moist, Gelatinous Tubeworm”

After dragging Sen. Ted Cruz on his show last night, Jimmy Kimmel heard from the Texas politician on Twitter. While Cruz is a frequent target for jokes on Jimmy Kimmel Live, he rarely responds to jabs from the late night host. But he couldn’t resist yesterday, and took their feud online.

It all began when Kimmel mocked Cruz for his reaction to a U.S. Army recruitment ad, HuffPost reports. In response to a TikTok comparing a Russian recruitment campaign and the U.S. recruitment ad — which featured a female soldier raised by two moms — Cruz complained on Twitter about America’s military becoming “woke” and “emasculated.”

“Ted Cruz, who four years ago took permanent residence up the ass of a man who beat him in every election by calling his wife ugly and slandering his elderly father, says this is emasculating. Primarily because Ted Cruz is not human,” Kimmel said on last night’s show. “He is a moist, gelatinous tubeworm whose elastic-band pants are filled with an inky discharge every time he speaks.”

The bit got back to Cruz, who called out Kimmel for “talking crap” after his show aired. Recalling his 2018 basketball match with the late night host, Cruz wrote, “Here’s a reminder, when we played one-on-one, I kicked his ass. He has to live with that…forever. Rematch, punk?”

Kimmel shot back with a one line reply: “Oh Ted… you get so sad after you masturbate.”

Kimmel first challenged Cruz to a basketball game after comparing him to a blobfish on Twitter. The game, dubbed the Blobfish Classic, was part elaborate late night stunt, part fundraiser, with the loser donating $5,000 to a charity of winner’s choice. While Kimmel lost, he still found a way to roast his opponent after the game.

“Just like a blobfish, the game was sloppy and within moments we were gasping for air,” Kimmel said. “We played one on one. It took almost an hour to get to 6 points ― which would be a lot if this was a World Cup soccer game. But it was not.”

Jimmy Kimmel Live airs weeknights at 11:35/10:35c on ABC. Watch Kimmel’s full monologue from last night in the video above.

Where to watch Jimmy Kimmel Live