TV Jerrod Carmichael comes out in new HBO stand-up special "I rebelled against it my whole life," the comedian says. By Andrea Towers Andrea Towers Andrea Towers is a former assistant editor at Entertainment Weekly. She left EW in 2016. EW's editorial guidelines Published on April 1, 2022 03:18PM EDT Jerrod Carmichael is ready to tell his story — his real story. In his upcoming HBO comedy special Rothaniel, which premieres Friday (but was taped in February at the Blue Note Jazz Club in Manhattan), Carmichael officially comes out as gay — and he doesn't shy away from talking about how this secret has deeply affected his life. Leading up to his revelation, Carmichael talks about when everything came to light after he caught his father cheating on his mother and his father confessed. "Once that was done, I was left alone feeling like a liar, because I had a secret," Carmichael tells the audience in the special. "One that I had kept from my mother and my father, my family, my friends, and you, all of you. Professionally, personally. And the secret is that I'm gay." Jerrod Carmichael. Vivien Killilea/Getty Images After pausing to collect himself amid a few "we love yous" from the audience, Carmichael continues, "That's really sweet. I really appreciate that. It means a lot, it means a lot. And I'm accepting the love. I really appreciate the love… I rebelled against it my whole life. I never thought I'd come out. I didn't think I'd ever, ever, every come out. Probably at many points I thought I'd rather die than confront the truth of that, to actually say it to people. Because I know it changes people's — some people — it changes their perception of me. I can't control that." Carmichael, who is set to make his Saturday Night Live hosting debut April 2 alongside musical guest Gunna, went on to discuss his friends' reaction to the news (which he said was much like Sally Field exclaiming "The whole time?!" in Mrs. Doubtfire) and how he came out late. "I'm from an environment where I was kind of raised to be a man — whatever that means," he says, before joking, "They don't expect gay babies. You don't see old ladies looking at a toddler, being like, 'Oh, look at his cheeks. I bet he's gonna be a top. Get that baby some PreP now.'" In the teaser released for his special, Carmichael alluded to his show having a more serious tone, with a voiceover that explained, "I've been trying to be very honest because my whole life was shrouded in secrets and figured the only route I haven't tried was the truth." Carmichael started his career on the Los Angeles stand-up scene and created the short-lived but beloved sitcom The Carmichael Show, which aired on NBC from 2015-2017 and tackled everything from racism to gun control. In 2021, he released his first film, On the Count of Three, which premiered at the Sundance Film Festival and which EW praised for being "poetically raw." Rothaniel premieres April 1 at 9 p.m. ET/PT on HBO and will be available to stream on HBO Max. Sign up for Entertainment Weekly's free daily newsletter to get breaking TV news, exclusive first looks, recaps, reviews, interviews with your favorite stars, and more. Related content: Jerrod Carmichael, Jake Gyllenhaal and Lizzo to host Saturday Night Live next Sundance Film Festival announces lineup for 2021 digital fest, including starry directorial debuts Jerrod Carmichael delivers a raw, darkly hilarious first film with On The Count of Three: Sundance review