‘Cover it up,’ a middle-aged man sneered while pointing at my breasts. Then, rather confusingly, yelled: ‘Take it off!’
I presume he was talking about my body – or rather what I was wearing, which was a pink corset crop top. But he wasn’t the only one to have something to say. Not long after, another man looked at my chest and exclaimed ‘wowee!’ as he walked past.
It’s not that I mind being looked at – it’s human nature. What annoys me is when people verbally or physically harass me, which isn’t needed at all.
After hearing both comments (within five minutes of each other) I was left wondering what would happen if I did dress more modestly. Would it make any difference at all – or would ‘pretty privilege’ still make me a target for their comments regardless?
In a bid to find out, I decided to cover up all my favourite ‘revealing’ outfits for a week, to see what would happen.
Monday
To start the experiment off I wore a nude, skin-tight minidress. I bought it from H&M last year to update my summer wardrobe, and I love how simple yet complimenting it is. However, this time, I put a blazer on top and tucked it into my jeans like a top.
Immediately, I felt invisible and truthfully hated the look, as if all the personality from the outfit was sucked away. As I went about my day, everybody just went on as if I didn’t exist. While I felt less anxious knowing that fewer eyes were on me, it didn’t make me feel any safer. After years of being catcalled and groped, it turns out the fear doesn’t go away just because of a change of outfit.
One thing I did notice, was that two men ushered me to get on the bus first, even though I arrived at the bus stop last. Having been ignored all day, it really threw me – was that ‘pretty privilege,’ or just them being polite? I’m not sure.
Tuesday
Today I put on a blue minidress that I love to go clubbing in and feel sexy and confident whenever I wear it. The slit at the waist is unique and friends always compliment me when I wear it. It’s not something I’d wear in the day though – unless I’m going to a party at 2pm!
Getting dressed for the office, I dig out another blazer and pair of jeans. Other than feeling significantly less fashionable as the best part of the outfit was covered (the waist slit) I didn’t feel much different to the day before.
However, this time I didn’t feel so invisible, after getting a flirty look from a man who stepped in the same lift as me. He didn’t speak to me, though, which is unusual – men normally feel comfortable flirting with me. Perhaps my outfit made me unapproachable.
Wednesday
Funnily enough, I covered up a cover-up. I’d first worn this bikini cover-up on a Spanish beach, soaking up the sun. In London, I soaked up the culture by adding a pair of baggy linen trousers and transforming the dress into a top.
For once, I loved the look. I felt hot and stylish – and I’d totally wear it again. The downside was I still didn’t feel safe and opted to get an Uber home instead of walk the 12 minutes back from the Tube to my house. In my head I still felt a target – with or without showing skin.
Thursday
Pink corset, be gone, as today I put on a baggy statement tee over the corset (which I treated like a bra.) To cover up my legs, I add a snazzy maxi-skirt to the outfit.
Admittedly, I felt way more comfortable than when I visibly wore my corset. I wasn’t constantly checking over my shoulder and my only thought wasn’t ‘I hope I don’t get harassed.’
I also walked on the same road I previously received the comments on and no one utters a word. It’s a pleasant experience and a relief – but it also made me feel angry. Why does it take covering up my body for me to achieve this?
Friday
Fridays are my days off work, so I didn’t do much other than go to the gym. My workouts outfit is perhaps my most ‘scandalous’, being a sports bra and tight cycling shorts.
To be fair, I’ve never had an uncomfortable experience in the gym, even when I left nothing to the imagination. However, I seem to be in the minority as according to a 2023 report by RunRepeat, 56% of women have experienced harassment at the gym.
Knowing this, for the sake of the experiment, I covered up by wearing a baggy t-shirt and long trousers. I felt just the same as I had all week – unremarkable.
It also made me feel like the colour grey: boring, drab and cheerless. I should’ve been relieved to not have been harassed, but clothes are the way I express myself, and by covering up, I couldn’t be who I am.
Saturday
I went out for some fresh air and decided to wear the pink version of the same outfit as Thursday – a jazzy maxi skirt and a top over my corset in an effort to cover up.
Except, I made a slight tweak. I’d discovered that wearing the corset as underwear was quite uncomfortable, so I just left that bit out and teamed my maxi skirt with a white crop top – making sure none of my stomach was on show.
I felt fine that day as I went to the park with my boyfriend. No one gave me a second glance and I wasn’t worried about my safety. While it’s great having him around, it’s such a shame I only feel completely at ease this way.
Sunday
My week of experimenting was nearly at an end. Instead of a backless crop top as I might do on a sunny summer’s day, I swamped my body with an oversized shirt with baggy jeans. You couldn’t even see the outline of my body, and safe to say, strangers left me alone.
While it was nice not to feel so ogled all the time, I must admit I felt a little depressed at the end of the week. Half from not being able to express myself, and half being upset that I had to change who I was in order for people to not harass me.
The social dilemma
I decided I wasn’t ready to finish my trial and was keen to see how it would play out online without IRL boundaries, so created two Tinder accounts: one covered and one uncovered. I had exactly the same details, bios, interests, answers to prompts and amount of photos. The only difference being that one showed pictures of me in revealing clothing, the other with me wearing my covered-up outfits from the week.
The plan was to swipe right on everyone three times over three days – so 75 in total – to see what they’d say.
The results shocked me.
I received more attention on my covered-up account, despite my face not being visible in one of the pictures. Plus, men were much more respectful and I was complimented on my style and eyes. They started up conversations on how many languages I could speak and mentioned my intelligence.
Covered up I was ‘lovely,’ but skin out and suddenly I was ‘sexy.’
For comparison, the first message I got on my revealing Tinder account was: ‘Looking good Sama, would love to put you in your place ;).’ I asked if he would say this to me in real life, to which he said yes, and added that he has ‘no time to be saying things to please others until he can finally be himself.’
I was concerned that he felt comfortable being creepy to women in real life.
The only uncomfortable message I got on my covered-up account was: ‘I’m not a weatherman but you can expect more than a few inches tonight.’
I asked him how he thought that was okay to say, to which he rebutted that it was a ‘harmless pickup line’ that he’s ‘not going through’ with and he thought that I’d ‘have a sense of humour.’
‘I believe that if I covered up, I would be less of a target,’ says sexual assault survivor Charlotte
This was a one-week-long experiment for me, but for 26-year-old Charlotte*, it’s been her life for the past year.
Charlotte, who has asked to remain anonymous due to an impending court case, began to dress more modestly after experiencing sexual assault in London.
‘Unfortunately, due to some of the trauma I’ve suffered, I’ve turned to dressing conservatively as a subconscious way to protect myself,’ she tells Metro.co.uk
‘I typically tend to cover up my chest and leg area and avoid v-neck tops. I feel like nothing can hurt me if I’m covered up.’
Charlotte, who has since moved back to the States, also always was on the phone to someone whenever she was walking back home. This is her way of coping.
Another thing that I found interesting was that men who were open to something long-term were more likely to match with me covered up than uncovered. Was I wifey material when you couldn’t see my breasts?
What the experiment taught me
Although this week has been interesting, I won’t continue to cover up for fear of being harassed.
Why should I have to feel invisible to feel safe? It isn’t right. A part of me feels like the creepy men win if I do.
I was surprised that I still got an odd look or two as I didn’t feel confident, so I didn’t expect others to see me as desirable. Plus, the man who flirted was respectful, and I still received acts of kindness. Chivalry isn’t dead.
But this doesn’t mean I feel safe and that my issue is resolved.
Even when I was covered up, a man told me to expect ‘more than a few inches’, so clearly my clothing was never the problem. Sexism, misogyny and machoism is.
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