August 15, 2002
CERTIFICATION MUMBO JUMBO WON'T HELP ANYTHING
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amIF you want a job done right, do not - I repeat, do not - send it to Washington. The latest example of the incompetence regularly practiced by our D.C....
COMMERCE BANCORP THINKS IT'S ABOVE THE LAW - IT'S NOT
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amCOMMERCE Bancorp of New Jersey is truly lucky. It can wipe away corporate wrongdoing without anyone noticing. Well, hardly anyone. A few weeks back, this column broke the news that...
STOCKS ROCKET - UPBEAT EARNINGS, RETAIL SALES BOOST DOW 260
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amAfter a rocky start and a 100-point dip in the Dow, stocks turned higher yesterday afternoon, with all three major market averages ending solidly in the black. In fact, after...
SHAREHOLDERS GIVE MARTHA THUMBS DOWN
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amMartha Stewart is the least popular member of her company's board. The doyenne of domesticity received fewer votes than all other board members of Martha Stewart Living Omnimedia when shareholders...
CITI WANTS QUICK $1B FROM SALE OF PARK AVE. BUILDING
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amBeleaguered Citigroup is hoping to pull down a fast $1 billion from the sale of its former headquarters at 399 Park Ave. To further cut costs, it is using its...
CEO DEADLINE SNARES 3 FIRMS
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amEmbattled Securities and Exchange Commission Chairman Harvey Pitt may finally have gotten something right. Despite relentless criticism of the unprecedented SEC order demanding that top brass of the nation's biggest...
HOUGHTON MIFFLIN FOR SALE AFTER ALL
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amCurious George is up for grabs after all. Reversing weeks of denials, Vivendi Universal said yesterday that it put Houghton Mifflin, the Boston publisher of "The Lord of the Rings"...
SHOCK JOCK STALKS HAMPTONS MANSE
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amRESIDENTS in East Hampton were shocked at the sight of lanky, raven-haired radio jock Howard Stern checking out a pricey place in their neighborhood recently. The self-professed "King of all...
TYCO EX-EXEC SUES FOR $9M SEVERANCE
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amA Tyco bigwig, who was sacked in a management shakeup after ex-chief Dennis Kozlowski was arrested for dodging taxes, is suing for $9 million in severance pay. The latest blow...
STOCKS ROCKET: UPBEAT EARNINGS, RETAIL SALES BOOST DOW 260
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amAfter a rocky start and a 100-point dip in the Dow, stocks turned higher yesterday afternoon, with all three major market averages ending solidly in the black. In fact, after...
CERT DEADLINE SNARES 3 FIRMS
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amEmbattled Securities and Exchange Commission chairman Harvey Pitt may finally have gotten something right. Despite relentless criticism of the unprecedented SEC order demanding that top brass of the nation's biggest...
STARR REPORT
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amModel behavior for new fall faces The September issue of Rosie magazine, on newsstands this Tuesday, features nine TV stars who are all starring in new fall series - and...
TRICKSY TROUPE KEEPS ON TROCKIN'
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amLES BALLETS TROCKADERO DE MONTE CARLOJoyce Theater, 175 Eighth Ave., at 19th Street; (212) 242-0800. Season runs through Aug. 24. ---------- LES Ballets Trockadero de Monte Carlo (that's the Monte...
QUEEN MARY REIGNS
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amMARY J. BLIGEMary J. Blige plays a return engagement tonight at the Apollo Theater. Show time is 8 p.m. -------- MARY J. Blige - the Queen of hip-hop soul -...
SIMON HAS A HUGE CRUSH ON ME AND THAT'S WHY I LOST - IT TURNED IDOL VOTERS OFF, SAYS CHRISTINA
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amCHRISTINA Christian, who was booted off last week's edition of "American Idol," says comments made by one of the judges - the show's villain, Simon Cowell - might have turned...
BRUCE SHOWS WHO'S BOSS
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amBruce is still The Boss of the charts, with his "The Rising" taking the No. 1 spot on the Top Album Sales Charts for the second consecutive week. Springsteen's latest,...
CHECK ME OUT - PHOTO OPS FOR SINGLES LEAD TO LOVE ON WEB
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amHIT the road, "Loneseome in Long Island" and "Need a Man in Manhattan." The rise of Web-based dating has made anonymous personal ads a thing of the past. Today's soulmate-seekers...
THE KING OF SCHLOCK; THIS IS NO WAY TO LOVE ELVIS
August 15, 2002 | 4:00am"Loving You" [Zero stars] Saturday night at 8:30 on NBC/Ch. 4 ---------- IF a network wants to celebrate the life of Elvis Presley, the last thing it should do is...
GREAT AMERICAN 'POP' OFF DOWN TO THE FINAL 4
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amCALL them "American Idol's" Fab Four. Georgia native R.J. Helton was the latest wannabe pop star to get tossed from Fox's hit talent show "American Idol," cutting the talent pool...
IF IDOL'S YOUR BAG, BUY IT ON THE WEB
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amAMERICAN Idol" has gone retail. T-shirts, hats, bags and other memorabilia will be available online at a Web store devoted exclusively to "Idol" merchandise. As of yesterday, the store -...
KNICKS TRYOUT A KICK: POST GAL JUMPS THROUGH HOOPS FOR SHOT AS DANCER
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amFORGET the Rockettes. Way too much repetitive kicking.The New York City Ballet? A snore.When you grow up in New York City and you love to dance, there's only one dream...
ROCK 'N' ROLL BUS SLAMS PEDESTRIAN
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amA bus carrying the rock band Audiovent struck a Manhattan woman as she crossed a Midtown street last night, cops said. The 65-year-old woman, whose name was not released, was...
OH, THOSE SWEET LITTLE 'BLOODS'
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amThe ruthless Bloods street gang faced the humiliation yesterday of being compared to a "Little League softball team" run by "squirts." Lawyer Robert Dunn, defending the Bloods' undisputed creator, Omar...
DENTIST GETS TO ROOT OF THE MATTER
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amForensic dentist Jeffrey Burkes sprang into action as soon as the New York medical examiner's office called him to say the World Trade Center was in flames. A 27-year veteran...
THE FINEST ARE WORTH EVERY PENNY AND MORE
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amEVEN if I thought teachers were doing a good job, which they profoundly are not, I would still feel exactly the same way. And that is: I'd rather die old...
DOOMSDAY PILL: ISRAELIS TO GET DRUG FOR IRAQI CHEM STRIKES
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amJERUSALEM - Israel has begun preparing for a "doomsday" attack from Iraq's Saddam Hussein - vaccinating emergency workers against smallpox and considering the mass distribution of anti-radiation pills, officials said...
EX-FIRE CHIEF NEW FIRE CHIEF
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amFor the first time in Fire Department history, a former fire chief has been reappointed to the very same position. Citywide tour commander Frank Caruthers, 56, was named chief of...
RILED ROCKETTES TAKE PROTEST TO THE STREETS
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amThe Rockettes high-stepped outside TV studios around the city yesterday to attract publicity in a bid to save their jobs - as replacement dancers they denounced as "scabs" lined up...
BLOOMY URGES DEMS TO PULL PLUG ON '9/10' AD
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amThe state Democratic Party should rethink its plan to air an ad the day before the commemoration of Sept. 11, Mayor Bloomberg said yesterday. "I don't think it's an appropriate...
NEW LIZZIE PLEA TALKS REVVING UP
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amThe new judge assigned to the Lizzie Grubman case is scheduled to set a trial date tomorrow - but recently resumed plea-bargain negotiations may help the spin princess avoid having...
STOOLIE: DRUGLORDS WIPING OUT MY FAMILY
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amA jailed informant who helped the feds nail a crew of Colombian drug dealers in the high-profile murder of a New York journalist says relatives back home are being picked...
THE ANGRY BLUE LINE - COPS RALLYING IN TIMES SQ. OVER PAY DEAL
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amCity cops - who will join firefighters for a massive union rally in Times Square today - will get a 14.1 percent pay raise under a contract arbiter's proposal, sources...
'STREET FIGHTERS' CHARGED IN SLAY
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amTwo men were charged yesterday with clubbing to death a Bangladeshi immigrant who stumbled on a street fight between Dominican and Bangladeshi mobs in Brooklyn, police said. Rafael Santos, 27,...
DEMS PLAY FOR KEEPS WITH HILL'S IMCLONE CASH
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amSHADES of Bill Clinton, it must depend on the meaning of the word "keep." Democrats have decided to keep almost all the fat-cat bucks Sen. Hillary Rodham Clinton got from...
SEALED WITH A KISS - INSIDE STORY OF OZZY'S VOW TO A DYING MOM
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amWEST HOLLYWOOD, Calif. - In an emotional deathbed vow, big-hearted rocker Ozzy Osbourne kissed a single mom stricken with cancer and told her he'd fund every need of her teenage...
SHRINK SLAMS SCHOOL 'PILL MILL' DISCIPLINE
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amA BRONX psychologist is charging that public-school educators are using local clinics as Ritalin "pill mills" to dispense medication to normal kids who don't need them. A horrified Bernice Bauman,...
JUDGE PUTS TOMMY HILFIGER IN DOG DAZE OVER PUPPY PERFUME
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amChill out, Tommy Hilfiger - every dog will have its day. That's the message from a Manhattan judge after the fashion designer got barking mad at a small-time pet company...
LAWYERS IN MOB FUROR
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amThe Gotti brothers' lawyers may be a little too much like "family," according to federal prosecutors, who have raised potential conflicts of interest to the attention of a federal judge....
NYPD TO PUT DETECTIVES ON FOREIGN ANTI-TERROR DUTY
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amFor the first time, a New York City detective will be posted in a foreign country next month when the NYPD exchanges an officer with the Toronto Police Department. Police...
EX-CON NABBED IN BRONX SLAY
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amA hardened Bronx ex-con was busted yesterday in the tragic murder of a hard-working Mexican immigrant who was stabbed in the heart while on his way to work, cops said....
'POP' STAR BLOOMY
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amHe's the billionaire, but who's the babe? It's Emma Bloomberg, the 23-year-old daughter of media-mogul-turned-mayor Mike Bloomberg, and she's doing her share to help the city following the Sept. 11...
BATTLE OVER LONG-RUNNING APOLLO SHOW
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amCall it "Showdown at the Apollo." Two TV production companies are battling for control of the 15-year-old show "It's Showtime at the Apollo." The conflict puts the Apollo Theater Foundation,...
DOC IN NEW ANTHRAX FUROR
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amWASHINGTON - Former Army biowarfare researcher Steven Hatfill yesterday denied he's ever set foot in Princeton, N.J., after FBI agents showed his picture to merchants near a mailbox where traces...
BRONX MOM NABS KID'S RAPISTS: COPS
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amThe mother of a 14-year-old rape victim and two of her Bronx neighbors captured three vicious teenagers who gang-raped the girl as she returned home from grocery shopping, police said...
DA CALLING BLIND MAN'S 'BLUFF' IN SLAY
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amThe Brooklyn DA's Office called a legally blind man as a key eyewitness in a murder case yesterday - even though the man insisted he saw nothing. "I don't know...
WITH THIS GIANT'S DEATH, WE MOURN FOR OURSELVES
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amCHARLES DICKENS would lecture: "It was the best of times and the worst of times." When it came to me and Neal Travis, it was simply a case of: "It...
CLASSROOM CRUSH IS EASING A LITTLE
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amThe new school year will open Sept. 5 with 13,262 additional seats in three dozen new schools and additions to existing schools, officials said yesterday. "It won't meet all of...
ARCHITECT CASTING CALL - REBUILD PANEL SEEKS FRESH IDEAS FOR WTC
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amRebuilding officials said yesterday they are launching an international search for architects and designers to breathe new life into plans for Ground Zero. "We are looking for excitement, creativity, energy,"...
'TERRORIST' IN COURTROOM OUTBURST
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amJERUSALEM - A top Palestinian, who Israel charges has been involved in dozens of deadly terror attacks, yesterday held his handcuffs over his head and defiantly shouted slogans - in...
POLICE: FLEEING SUSPECT RUNS DOWN WIFE, COPS
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amA Queens man was arrested yesterday for mowing down two narcotics detectives and his own wife with a car during a drug buy-and-bust operation, police said. Joseph Steinert, 39, was...
NEW TWIST IN KERIK CAPER AT LA GUARDIA
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amA preliminary finding that security was not breached last month at La Guardia Airport when ex-Police Commissioner Bernard Kerik walked around a metal-detector came days before internal investigators interviewed any...
CITIGROUP BLDG. GETS A 'LEG' UP ON TERROR
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amOne of the city's most recognizable landmarks, the Citigroup Center, is being quietly reinforced in the wake of Sept. 11, The Post has learned. It's believed to be the city's...
DA LINKS DOC TO MOB THUG
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amA Brooklyn dentist teamed up with an aging Mafia gangster to strong-arm a Queens businessman out of thousands of dollars over three years, prosecutors charge in an indictment announced yesterday....
L.I. POLS IN ANTI-CIG CRUSADE
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amTwo Long Island lawmakers want Nassau and Suffolk counties to join the Big Apple in banning smoking in bars and restaurants. Nassau County legislator Brian Muellers and Suffolk legislator Brian...
EX-CON NABBED IN BX. STAB-SLAY
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amA hardened Bronx ex-con was busted yesterday in the tragic murder of a hardworking Mexican immigrant who was stabbed in the heart while on his way to work, cops said....
'DRUNKEN' DRIVER HITS COP CAR
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amA drunken driver was arrested early yesterday in Bedford-Stuyvesant after he smashed into a police car and injured two cops, police said. The incident occurred at 12:25 a.m., when police...
SUBWAY PAY-PHONE NIGHTMARE
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amNearly one out of every three pay phones in city subway stations is out of order, according to a scathing survey. That represents a stunning deterioration over the past year,...
ARCHITECTURAL CASTING CALL: REBUILD PANEL SEEKS FRESH IDEAS FOR WTC
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amRebuilding officials said yesterday they are launching an international search for architects and designers to breathe new life into plans for Ground Zero. "We are looking for excitement, creativity, energy,"...
KNOCK YOURSELVES OUT, BUT SHOW US SOME STREET CRED
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amFROM: Steve Cuozzo, Post Real Estate Columnist TO: The World's Greatest Architects (you know who you are) SUBJECT: Rebuilding the World Trade Center site. Congratulations, guys, on being invited to...
DOT DENIES KERIK AIRPORT BREACH
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amThe "preliminary finding" that security was not breached last month at La Guardia Airport when ex-NYPD Commissioner Bernard Kerik walked around a metal detector came days before investigators even interviewed...
PREZ ZAPS D.C. SPENDERS
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amWASHINGTON - A feisty President Bush yesterday zinged Congress as big spenders who could put "a drag" on the economy - as he tried out themes for the fall elections...
LEVY WARNING PRINCIPALS: DON'T LET $$ AX NICK KIDS
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amBudget wars have broken out in the schools. Several high-school principals told The Post yesterday that budget cuts for the new academic year will directly affect students. But outgoing Schools...
NICK STAYING ON SHELF
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amYANKEE NOTES KANSAS CITY - Don't expect Nick Johnson back from the DL on Aug. 23, the first day he is eligible to come off the shelf. "I suspect it...
GOOD MORNING! - BERNIE'S HIT GIVES YANKS MARATHON WIN
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amKANSAS CITY - Until Bernie Williams delivered in the clutch, there was a chance Andy Pettitte's gem was going to be ruined by Mike Sweeney's steal of home. Pettitte worked...
ROOKIE SHOW READY TO PUT UP FIGHT
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amGIANT NOTES ALBANY - Sometimes the best way to go is the obvious way. That's the way last night's Rookie Show was expected to go for the Giants. "I think...
NO-NAME BARNES GETTING NOTICED
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amALBANY - It is one thing to be unknown, another to be unnamed. Darian Barnes came to the Giants as an unknown. He, in many ways, remains unnamed. Way back...
UNBEATEN FILLY DIES
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amSARATOGA SPRINGS - The Todd Pletcher stable, already reeling from Whitney winner Left Bank's life-threatening bout of colic last weekend, received another body blow Monday with the death of unbeaten...
HAZELTINE UP FOR GRABS
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amCHASKA, Minn. - Hazeltine National will measure 7,360 yards for the 84th PGA Championship that begins with today's opening round. It's the longest venue for a major this year, longer...
ZAVATA SIZZLES AT SPA
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amSARATOGA SPRINGS - The sensational 2-year-old colt Zavata, named for a famous circus clown in France, won laughing yesterday at the Old Spa, cycling past the leaders on the far...
HOU PASSES UP TEAM USA INVITE
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amKNICK NOTES Allan Houston will still be an international man in September though he turned down an invitation to play for Team USA at the World Championships in Indianapolis. With...
IT'S ALL 'BOUT FRIENDSHIP
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amFor a heavyweight bout aptly-billed "Everything On the Line" - or for any heavyweight bout, to be honest - the sight of foes laughing and hugging three days before the...
HALL KICKED OUT JET NOTES
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amJohn Hall will not kick for the Jets in tonight's preseason game against the Ravens in Baltimore because of a sore right hip. Hall, who hasn't kicked in practice the...
ROGERS WANTS JOB AS STARTER
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amThe newest member of Rod Thorn's Nets juggernaut said yesterday he's not yet conceding the starting small-forward job to Richard Jefferson. Rodney Rogers, whose free-agent signing was announced yesterday to...
COWART NOT AFRAID - JETS LB READY FOR RETURN TO ACTION
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amBALTIMORE - Sure, it's only a preseason game. Don't, however, tell that to Jets linebacker Sam Cowart, who'll be making his first appearance in any game since last September when...
STEWART HONORED - MEMORIAL FOR PAYNE ON 16TH
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amPGA NOTES CHASKA, Minn. -Last week a plaque dedicated to Payne Stewart was placed on a bridge on the 16th hole where Stewart took control of the 1991 U.S. Open...
TRAMMELL: Y2K SPARK MISSING ON '02 METS
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amAlmost from the get-go, there has been something missing from these Mets. In the first few months of the season, the offense had as much bite as a beagle puppy....
ALL EYES ON HARLEM'S ALL-STARS - LL PROBE QUESTIONS PLAYERS' RESIDENCY
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amHarlem crowed yesterday as its Little League heroes prepared to head off for the Little League World Series - but new questions of whether three boys are eligible to play...
PIAZZA SITS OUT TO REST WRIST
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amMET NOTES Mike Piazza has been diagnosed with tendinitis in his left wrist and did not start last night against the Padres. Piazza had X-rays taken when the Mets were...
METS MUST KEEP FONZIE IN THE FOLD
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amAS difficult as the Mets have been to watch all hot, summer long, try to imagine what they would be playing like if they didn't have Edgardo Alfonzo having a...
METS' PICK IMPRESSES
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amIn his professional debut, Scott Kazmir lived up to the hype. The Mets' first-round draft pick (15th overall) started for the Class-A Cyclones in Aberdeen last night, firing two innings...
UP CLOSE OR FAR AWAY, METS STINK
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amI didn't much care for the view of the Mets from the pressbox, where it was so muggy and full of hot air, so I ventured into the left field...
SHEA SHAMBLES - PADRES POUND PUTRID MUTTS
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amBy 10:20 last night, the Diamond Club at Shea Stadium was empty. The fans - all 26,210 who attended last night's Amazin' stink-fest - were long gone. Just like the...
YANKS EYEING HALTER
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amKANSAS CITY - The Yankees are close to finalizing a deal that would allow them to go with the customary 11 pitchers instead of the dozen they have been carrying....
LUMBERING ALONG: HARD-HITTING YANKS KEEP WINNING, BUT TORRE'S WARY
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amKANSAS CITY - They rip into the Jeff Suppans of the American League and extract double-digit run totals. But what happens when October arrives? When scouting reports detail every hole...
HARLEM'S ALL-STARS TOAST OF TOWN
August 15, 2002 | 4:00amHarlem crowed yesterday as its Little League heroes prepared to head off for the Little League World Series - but new questions of whether three boys are eligible to play...