Dinner Party Cheat Sheet is calling off all dinner parties this weekend on the account of the heat. You have air-conditioning? Well, well. Aren’t we big spenders?
CANINE SPIRIT
The licensing wing of Tommy Hilfiger barked up the wrong tree when it sued perfume manufacturer Nature Labs for making a scent for dogs called Timmy Holedigger. A Manhattan federal judge tossed out the suit, saying, “Hilfiger fails to see the humor in all this.” In response, Hilfiger said they do see the humor “in all this” and they’ll show it by marketing their own pet scent called Jimmy Leghumper.
PEACE PROCE$$
Israeli officials believe Yasser Arafat raked in $1.3 billion dollars by pocketing some financial aid money sent to the Palestinian Authority from 1993 to 2000. It makes sense. Arafat hopes to use his wealth to run for mayor of New York.
IT’S FOR YOU
A Manhattan councilman is introducing legislation that will make it illegal to keep a cell phone turned on in a public space such as a theater, a cinema or a library. “The phone conversations are so stupid,” said Councilman Phil Reed (D-East Harlem). “[The bill] protects the people who are talking, so they don’t look so stupid.” Reed’s onto something: a government of the stupid, by the stupid, for the stupid.
LOOT
In an effort to “increase revenue and streamline the operation,” the NYPD is searching for an Internet auction company to sell seized property and other unclaimed evidence online, a police spokesman said. That’s good news. I could never find a crack pipe on eBay.
SURVEY SAYS
A recent Zogby International poll has Al Gore leading the field of 2004 Democratic presidential contenders at 41 percent. Most surveyed, however, didn’t realize it was 2002.
IF YOU GOT ‘EM
You’ve heard that anti-smokers have set their sights on restaurants, bars and company cars, but now they’re targeting parks and beaches, too. Said one anti-smoking spokesman: “Our parks don’t allow alcoholic beverages. Our parks don’t allow dogs in a lot of them … But they still allow smoking.” Alcohol isn’t allowed in parks? Uh-oh.