Ex-bride turned marketer creates ‘missed RSVP’ cards for wedding guests who don’t respond by deadline
A former bride is holding wedding guests accountable for proper etiquette with a recent move — one that’s come with some scrutiny.
Nishma Mistry was a bride 14 years ago, but today she’s a marketing manager for an online bridal community.
The 39-year-old recently decided to draft a statement for brides and grooms to use when their guests haven’t responded to invitations by the deadline, as SWNS reported.
Mistry crafted this message: “We’re sorry you can’t make it to our wedding. Our RSVP deadline has passed, and you unfortunately did not respond.”
The message goes on: “We would have loved to have you attend, but final numbers have now been turned in and your presence will be missed.” This message can then be signed by the bride and groom.
Mistry, who said she invited 550 guests to her own wedding in the early 2000s, understood the frustration for brides in that situation.
“It has to be such a hard deadline that if we see photos of your reception, there should be no empty seats.”
Still, the Atlanta, Georgia-based mom of two kids said she’s gotten some criticism for her unique message.
“People are saying it is a bit tacky, but people have the invite for four months … It’s inconsiderate” of them not to reply, she told SWNS.
When recalling her own large wedding of years ago, she said that she had to individually call all 550 of her invited guests to ask if they were coming — saying it was “such a waste of time.”
Fox News Digital spoke with an etiquette expert, who has spent a decade specializing in wedding etiquette, about the matter.
Elaine Swann, founder of The Swann School of Protocol in California, said brides should go for it.
“I did advise my brides to send a note to folks when they missed the cutoff, so I do believe that this response is acceptable,” she said.
Swann said that in her 10 years of advising on wedding etiquette, she did have one bride do this, due to a planned intricate meal for the event.
“I did have a bride do this, and the party who received it was sorely disappointed, but they had to accept it as their truth,” she said.
The etiquette expert did advise people to only use this type of missed deadline statement if it is absolutely necessary.
“It has to be such a hard deadline that if we see photos of your reception, there should be no empty seats,” she said.
Swann advised tweaking Mistry’s original draft statement by taking out the section that says, “You unfortunately did not respond.”
Her reasoning? There’s no point in making the invited guest feel worse about missing the important deadline.
“We certainly don’t want to kind of rub it in by saying [that],” she said.
Overall, Swann said it’s incredibly important to always respect an RSVP deadline — no matter the event.
