With everything older returning again, predicter/psychic John Cohan on what’s new for some in the new year:
Taylor Swift remakes “Valley of the Dolls.” Career, great. Lovelife, ungreat.
Cher and John Mayer. Romantic relationship
Roseanne’s revenge. New TV show! A success!
Jennifer Aniston and Brad Pitt play pattycake again???
Mariska Hargitay leaves her TV thing for another thing — but the thing is the original thing worked better for her.
Brooke Shields shines on B’way in “Woman of the Year.”
And here’s some nice year-end news: Princess Caroline of Monaco’s daughter Charlotte Casiraghi, with a son from another relationship, delivered a second son in Monaco’s Princess Grace hospital. Until recently, she was engaged to the dad, film maker Dimitri Rassam, son of French actress Carole Bouquet. Listen, they’re busy over there.
A charming holiday touch to maybe forever do without? E-mailed Christmas cards. Junky. Cheesy. Quick, offputting, uncaring, cheap. I opened none.
Movie star check-in
Indie comedy darling Kathryn Hahn’s New Year wish? To be taken seriously. “I live between comedy and drama,” she says. Her new “Private Life” with Paul Giamatti is about having a child through a surrogate. Also “My new HBO series ‘Mrs. Fletcher’ is drama.” So, please, no laughing please . . . With all the miseries happening, here’s a good thing coming: Tom Hanks, Chris Cooper, Matthew Rhys in “A Beautiful Day in the Neighborhood” is about kindness triumphing cynicism. Of Fred Rogers’ (Hanks) real friendship after a jaded writer profiling Rogers overcomes skepticism and learns empathy, kindness, and decency from one beloved American. It opens in October.
Eatery goes to pot
During the holiday season, a supposedly fine Chinese restaurant. One regular — a doctor careful about food, said: “It’s got this world’s best wonton soup.”
Suddenly, past a line waiting an hour to get in, employees and diners rush out. Whoopsing. Into garbage cans. In front of everyone. Complaining they don’t feel well. 911’s called. The place shuts. Ambulances arrive.
Everyone’s staring. Nobody knows anything. Eventually unraveled is that someone may have laced certain food with heavy doses of marijuana.
And aren’t we all fortunate it’s getting closer to being declared legal for recreation in New York?
Celebs pick party spots
Gabrial Byrne and wife Hannah Beth King celebrated at Ballymaloe House Cafe in Ireland’s East Cork. Six small tables, max. Not exactly dressy. Her outfit was army jacket, ankle boots, no socks . . . Another offbeat party place was boxing legend Oscar de la Hoya at Meatpacking District’s Dos Caminos. The nourishment? Tacos and tequilas.
Not all flowers & sunshine
And here’s a sort of sweet goodwill -toward-men happening: Bronx Park’s Chandra — a hard-working longtime citizen who didn’t come in on any banana boat — decorated her hall with a display of happy amaryllis flowers. An Uber driver Grinch checked for possible cameras then swiped the entire display — vase and all.
May Uber understand that I have the exact address, exact time, exact car, exact driver answering the exact phone call.
Electronic store. Ice cube-size plastic alarm clock for traveling — $12.
Months later same store, same timepiece, the owner asked $100. He finally bargained down to $60.
It got lost, and replacing it in six months?
A clerk charged $29.95.
Only in New York, kids, only in New York.