Let’s discuss that three-named serpent who, slithering into Melania’s trust, surreptitiously recorded her and now looks to sell a book.
Similar situations have happened to others of us. We’re not first ladies. But, for whatever reason, achieving some small something makes us vulnerable. I experienced it. My lawyer Barry Slotnick handled it — and her.
Were Marie Antoinette around, she might say, “Imagine the penalties should this happen in some other country.”
First lady-ing is on-the-job training. No school teaches it. Melania hasn’t sought publicity. Melania keeps her family life contained. Melania isn’t scratching for me-me-me. She’s handled this handsomely.
Truman’s daughter was a lousy singer, so Daddy wrote a critic a nasty note. Mrs. Reagan wanted importance, so she changed the White House dishes. George Washington raised two kids from busy Martha’s previous marriage. Mrs. Abraham Lincoln? A depressive. Harding’s wife not thrilled to begin with because Warren made an illegitimate child.
I know Melania lots of years. Donald brought her to my home when they were dating. And when her coat somehow became lost, she remained a lady. Not upset. Of course we eventually found it — but I’ve been with her since his election, and she’s remained that lady. Not upstaging. Never seeking attention.
Dissing her wardrobe or accent? Hey, that’s America. The freedom to bitch. But we’re not seeing her family out drinking or in the news. What we’re seeing is a calm, disciplined, elegant first lady.
And may lawyers, publishers or someone stomp this cobra who spit out that book.
Lensman had control
New book about Richard Avedon is “What Becomes a Legend Most.” His assistant and studio manager Gideon Lewin, who worked 24/7 and whose own book last year was “Avedon: Behind the Scenes 1964-1980,” says: “He preferred portraiture, but everyone focused on his fashion images. He manipulated everyone. Unknowns who then became famous — Veruschka, Lauren Hutton, Dovima, Suzy Parker, Twiggy, Rene Russo, Marisa Berenson, Beverly Johnson, Jean Shrimpton — he’d position, orchestrate, make jump. He told dog-loving Duke and Duchess of Windsor he’d just seen a dog run over. A lie. But hearing that replaced their usual staid look. For Sophia Loren’s multiple hair extensions, he had me hold up a wind machine.
“Avedon was always the one in control.”
Pay attention
Julian Fellowes’ “The Gilded Age,” about rich New Yorkers in the 1800s, got shut down. COVID. Two crew guys tested positive. Production was scrubbed, folks were tested and retested. Stars are Christine Baranski and Cynthia Nixon … Professional sports betting dudes who set odds on ballgames, horse races and presidential matches have already assessed 2024’s presidential hustle. It’s Cuomo 25-1, Bloomberg 33-1, Hillary 50-1, Don Jr. 100-1, Kushner 150-1. In 2016, before DJT ran for president, the odds against him were 200-1.
Personality wins?
Everybody’s now’s so politically correct that even elephants will soon turn pink. So I asked a released felon on why he then did a TV sit-down. He answered: “The need to persuade others you’re really a good person. It’s why Trump did 18 chats with Woodward, who’d just written a poisonous book about him. He felt his charisma could overcome whatever and he’d set it all straight. Didn’t happen. Listen, Cleopatra wasn’t dumb. She probably knew she couldn’t charm that asp.”
With the crash of trash on our streets, someone left a working upright piano — right with the garbage — on West 72nd between Broadway and West End. Writer James Fragale saw it there Friday 7 p.m.
Listen, you have to admit: Only in New York, kids, only in New York.