Dr. Ruth Westheimer, Renowned Sex Therapist, Dies at 96

Dr. Ruth Westheimer, the sex therapist who became a pop culture phenomenon in the 1980s for her frank and humorous approach to human sexuality, has died. She was 96.

The one-time radio talk show host died on Friday, July 12, her publicist, Pierre Lehu, who co-authored books with Westheimer, confirmed to PEOPLE on Saturday, July 13.

"She was restful when she passed away. Her son and daughter were with her and holding her hand at that moment," Lehu says, adding, "It was as peacefully as she could possibly go. She was 96."

He continued of his late friend, "It's amazing, there was stuff still going on in her life [she has a book coming out this fall with Allison Gilbert] and someone wants to make a biopic about her."

Lehu did not provide further details of Westheimer's cause of death, but according to The New York Times and The Washington Post, she died at home in New York City.

In June 2023, Westheimer spoke to PEOPLE about what surprised her most about her life.

“That I became famous,” she said when celebrating her 95th birthday. “That I have a wonderful daughter, son-in-law, a wonderful son and daughter-in-law and four wonderful grandchildren."

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Westheimer was born Karola Ruth Siegel on June 4, 1928, in Wiesenfeld, Germany.

A Jewish refugee, Westheimer called herself “an orphan of the Holocaust” after losing her entire family during World War II. Her father, Julius, was taken away by the Nazis in 1938. Approximately six weeks later, her mother and grandmother put her on a train to Switzerland as part of the ‘”kindertransport,” the organized escape of thousands of Jewish children out of Germany.

After the war, she emigrated to Palestine in 1945, where she began going by her middle name, Ruth, and was trained to be a sniper for the Israeli Army.

From there, she moved to Paris to study psychology at Sorbonne University and then, New York City. Twice married and divorced, she met Manfred Westheimer, a telecommunications engineer and fellow Jewish refugee, in 1961. He became her third husband, and she called their 36-year union her “real marriage.”

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As she pursued her post doctoral research in human sexuality, she began working at Planned Parenthood, where she trained family planning counselors.

It was in 1980 when she got the offer that would change her life.

Public radio station WYNY’s community affairs manager, Betty Elam, who had heard Westheimer speak, proposed the idea of a call-in show on sex education. What started as a 15-minute debut after midnight turned into the live call-in show Sexually Speaking, which lasted ten years and led to a series of tv and radio shows.

Westheimer was known for answering questions clearly and often with humor. “When people needed to learn about oral sex, I would say go buy an ice cream cone and practice,” she said back in 2019.

In later years, she stayed relevant by lecturing, teaching and writing books. Westheimer received many awards for her work over the years, including an honorary doctorate degree from Trinity College in 2004 and the Medal for Distinguished Service from the Teacher’s College at Columbia University. Additionally, Ask Dr. Ruth, a film about her extraordinary life, premiered in theaters in 2019.

Westheimer is survived by her two children, Miriam and Joel, and four grandchildren. Her husband, Manfred, died in 1997. 

"With such a difficult beginning like me, having been an orphan at the age of 10 years old — no parents, no brothers and sisters — all I feel is gratefulness," she previously told PEOPLE.