Nick Cave Reflects on Grief After Losing Two Sons: 'We Become Creatures of Loss as We Get Older'

The grief that accompanied the deaths of two of Nick Cave's sons has fundamentally changed how he sees the world.

In a new, wide-ranging interview with Australia's ABC News, the "Red Right Hand" singer, 66, opened up about losing his 15-year-old son Arthur, who fell off a cliff in Brighton, England, in 2015, and his eldest son Jethro, who died of undisclosed causes at age 31 in 2022.

Prior to the two sons' deaths, Cave said he was "in awe of my own genius," but his perspective shifted in the face of so much loss. "I just saw the folly of that ... disgraceful sort of self-indulgence," he told Leigh Sales in his Australian Story interview.

"I'm a father and I'm a husband and a grandfather and a kind of person of the world," he continued. "These things are much more important to me than the concept of being an artist."

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In addition to Arthur and Jethro, Cave is also father to 24-year-old Earl, Arthur's twin, whom he shares with wife Susie Cave, and 33-year-old Luke, whom he had with his ex-wife Viviane Carneiro. (He shared Jethro with his ex Beau Lazenby.)

The Bad Seeds frontman confirmed on his website in May that his son Luke and daughter-in-law Sasha welcomed a baby boy named Roman, making the singer a first-time grandfather.

For Cave, his website — known as The Red Hand Files, a place where fans ask him questions — became a lifeline as he dealt with the grief over his sons.

"The basic response to personal tragedy [is] to sort of shut down and harden around the absence of somebody," he said. "And this just kept me open."

He added, "We eventually absorb, or rearrange ourselves, so that we become creatures of loss as we get older; this is part of our fundamental fabric of what we are as human beings."

For Cave, this isn't "tragic," it's simply about the expansion of the human experience.

"This is not a tragic element to our lives but rather a deepening element and that brings incredible meaning into our life," he said. "I've found that personally, and I think a lot of other people have found that, provided you can remain open."

Cave also discussed turning to Christianity after the deaths of two of his sons, and how being open about his religion has lost him and his band some fans.

"After Arthur died, not immediately, it's been quite a while now, but rather than feeling anger ... or rejecting that sort of stuff, I felt a slow movement towards a religious life that I've found extremely helpful," he revealed.

Cave added that neither he or the Bad Seeds has ever worried about losing fans over the years.

"I think that's the reason why we hang around for so long, because our audience is being constantly sort of reinvigorated by presenting different forms of music," he said.

Nick Cave and the Bad Seeds will release a new album, Wild God, on Aug. 30.