Is wearing black preventing you from finding love? Star of TLC's 'The Psychic Matchmaker' reveals mystical secrets and practical methods for attracting a soulmate
- Deborah Graham is a third generation psychic and star of SiriusXM's 'Psychic Connection with Deborah Graham' and TLC's 'The Psychic Matchmaker'
- When connecting with someone on a spiritual level, Graham tells Daily Mail you need to focus on the eyes, as they are the window to the soul
- She believes finding a true and forever love begins with a commitment to energy work within
Are you having a hard time attracting love? Third generation psychic Deborah Graham can help.
The star of SiriusXM's 'Psychic Connection with Deborah Graham' and TLC's 'The Psychic Matchmaker', shares her mystical secrets and practical methods for helping thousands of individuals find their soulmate.
From using your third eye to wearing the right color, Deborah reveals to Daily Mail what it takes to make a true and lasting connection.
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Are you having a hard time attracting love? Third generation psychic Deborah Graham can help
It's what's on the inside that really matters
'When I make a match, I do it from the inside,' says the gifted psychic, energy healer and practicing matchmaker for over 30 years.
'I see beautiful love from within people — love and power and the essence of who they are — and I connect with that and feel their lives.
'By tapping into the solar plexus chakra (where an individual's essence is contained), I can pair a person with a match that will last a lifetime.'
Deborah's advantage over a traditional matchmaker is that she can see your future.
'I know if this is going to be a a true connection or if this is going to be a "Wham, Bam, Thank You Ma' am!"
How to recognize the signs of a perfect match
When connecting with someone on a spiritual level, Deborah says to focus on the eyes, as they are the window to the soul.
'That's going to show you whether that person is the right connection, whether that person is a for-now or forever person,' she explains
'If you cannot see yourself in a person's soul and energy then that's definitely not an energy match.
'If that person is looking left or looking right and avoiding having eye contact with you, chances are they are avoiding something energetically.
'That means they are not open, they are not ready, or they have someone else and they're just looking for a for now.'
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Star of SiriusXM's 'Psychic Connection with Deborah Graham' and TLC's 'The Psychic Matchmaker', Deborah Graham, shares her knowledge on her podcast and in her two books
Get out there and meet people IRL
'I always say you should go out as much as possible,' says the author of 'Get Your Head Out of Your App: A Psychic's Guide to Attracting and Keeping True Love.'
'Just show up. Dress up and show up, even if you don't have a date, get out and go.'
To increase your chances of meeting someone, Deborah believes you should get out of your comfort zone, go out by yourself and be open to talking to others.
'It takes guts but you don't need a wingman, you just need to connect with yourself.'
The more you show up, the more the universe will reward you.
Wear bright, uplifting colors
Dark colors are often linked to sadness and negativity.
Deborah believes that by wearing dark shades like black or grey you are actually blocking yourself from meeting someone and recommends incorporating vibrant hues or pops of color into your look.
'Red is a rooting and grounding color, so if you feel like you're all over the place and you feel like your energy is not in line, I always tell people to wear the color red.
'The heart chakra is the 4th chakra and that is the color green. Green is a direct connection to God and your soul energy.
'So there's green and pink in the 4th chakra and that's going to help you activate as well as accelerate to get to where you want to be versus where you're at.'
Stand tall, never slouch
'Have your shoulders back and head up tall. Never slouch, that's showing a lower vibration,' Deborah explains.
'Whenever you walk into anything, walk in like you own it. You own your energy. Your aura will radiate with color and people will be attracted to you.
'It doesn't matter what you look like on the outside, it's what you are in the inside and that's what people are attracted to when finding their perfect match.'
To allow your energy to shine, you must be you.
'Don't change for anybody,' say Deborah.
'It's like shoe shopping. If the shoe doesn't fit, don't get it. And never settle for second best. Always get what you want and never try to change your looks.'
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The biggest first-date saboteur
Resist information overload.
'You never want to talk too much about what your needs and wants are in a relationship because that person is going to be exactly that even though they may not be any of those things.'
The expert suggests saying, 'I'm open and ready. I'm here and present and I'm looking for someone who is open and ready to connect.'
She believes when someone is really connected with you, you will know.
Deborah recommends always asking them more questions.
'Never talk about your ex partner or tell them about how bad they are. If you have anger in you, you're not ready to be in a relationship.'
The rule of three
'Always go on at least three dates with the same person within three weeks, and always wait three months before you consummate the relationship,' she says.
According to the psychic matchmaker, dates don't even have to be in person, they can be over Zoom or Face Time, just as long as there is direct eye contact.
'By the third date you'll know if it's an energy connection.
'If you feel energetically exhausted, that's when I say run! That's an energy vampire.'
In this day and age being monogamous and refraining from all sexual contact for three months can be tricky but Deborah believes it to be important for finding a soul connection.
'It's about going out and connecting on a soul level versus a physical level. If they're not going to wait it out then they aren't that great for you.'
!['Trust your third chakra, that is your intuition, I call it your psychic portal,' says Deborah](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2024/03/14/22/82488551-13193611-image-a-336_1710456538609.jpg)
'Trust your third chakra, that is your intuition, I call it your psychic portal,' says Deborah
Look to your chakras
There are seven main chakras in the body from the base of the spine to the crown of the head.
The third eye can help you make decisions based on your emotional and gut feelings. Aligning yourself with your third eye helps you see the unseen.
'Trust your third chakra, that is your intuition, I call it your psychic portal,' says Deborah.
'It is the window to your subconscious soul. By going to the window of your soul, you're able to access your vibration and energy at a higher frequency.
'The third eye is the energy that connects you to God and spirit, it's like the umbilical cord that we all came into this earth with - that's your true intention.'
Keep the flow of positive energy moving
Finding a true and forever love begins with a commitment to energy work within - clearing away self-doubts and fears.
Deborah recommends a daily 5-10 minute meditation to get connected.
'You have to pull the weeds away from your heart and soul and keep pulling,' she says.
'If you can create positive, vibrant energy within yourself, you will emit positive vibrations.
'But if you believe that life sucks, it will suck, and you'll never find what you're looking for.'
Blockages or imbalances can lead to health issues and emotional disturbances.
According to Deborah, it's important to clear out the old both mentally and physically.
'If your partner was cheating on you and you're having a hard time meeting someone else, throw out that mattress you're still attracting old energy.
Learn your lessons
Deborah believes that 99% of people are not attracting what they want because they are not learning their lesson or letting go of past traumas, and they're bringing negativity into their present.
If you don't learn a lesson, it will keep repeating until you do.
'Life is a filtration system, you have to let go and allow your spirit to finally be aware and awaken. But most of all you have to stop transferring negative energy, that's what we call a soul trap.
'A soul trap is when we're not letting our thoughts, our soul, our mind and our energy release from the old because we're holding on to all the past pain.'
To grow from a situation, Graham suggests looking at five things that you have learned - both good and bad - from an unhealthy relationship.
'I like to call myself the 30 second scan, all I need is 30 seconds to read your energy and I'm able to figure out where your energy needs to be versus where it's at.'
For a live reading on her podcast go to psychicdeborahgraham.com