'I was depressed and didn't wanna live': Mary J Blige says she hit rock bottom before iconic album My Life and compares childhood in Yonkers projects to 'prison' in new documentary trailer
Mary J Blige laid her bleakest moments bare in a new trailer for her upcoming documentary My Life.
The 50-year-old singing legend reflected on how her 1994 album My Life was inspired by a time when she was 'depressed and didn't wanna live.'
She said: 'I had it all inside and I was able to sing it and write it. I didn't know that so many people felt the same way.'
!['Didn't wanna live': A couple of years ago Mary laid her bleakest moments bare in a harrowing documentary about herself called My Life](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708325-9641303-image-m-2_1622570804527.jpg)
Looking back: Mary J. Blige laid her bleakest moments bare in a new trailer for her upcoming documentary My Life
At another point she said of her relationship with her public: 'There's just something really powerful about inspiring each other to wanna live to see another day.'
Mary shared: 'My Life is probably my darkest album, at one of the darkest times I've had. Most of the times I just was just depressed and didn't want to live.'
During the trailer she also looked back at her hardscrabble childhood much of which was spent in a housing project in Yonkers.
Her nurse mother was an alcoholic and her father - who abused the mother - was a Vietnam veteran with PTSD who walked out when Mary was four.
![Tough moment: The 50-year-old singing legend reflected on how her 1994 album My Life was inspired by a time when she was 'depressed and didn't wanna live'](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708435-9641303-image-m-4_1622570901213.jpg)
Tough moment: The 50-year-old singing legend reflected on how her 1994 album My Life was inspired by a time when she was 'depressed and didn't wanna live'
![Letting it out: She said: 'I had it all inside and I was able to sing it and write it,' adding: 'I didn't know that so many people felt the same way'](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708439-9641303-Letting_it_out_She_said_I_had_it_all_inside_and_I_was_able_to_si-m-6_1622571040492.jpg)
Letting it out: She said: 'I had it all inside and I was able to sing it and write it,' adding: 'I didn't know that so many people felt the same way'
![Bond: At another point she said of her relationship with her public: 'There's just something really powerful about inspiring each other to wanna live to see another day'](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708363-9641303-Bond_At_another_point_she_said_of_her_relationship_with_her_publ-m-8_1622571077820.jpg)
Bond: At another point she said of her relationship with her public: 'There's just something really powerful about inspiring each other to wanna live to see another day'
![Throwback: Mary shared: 'My Life is probably my darkest album, at one of the darkest times I've had,' saying: 'Most of the times I just was just depressed and didn't want to live'](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708433-9641303-Throwback_Mary_shared_My_Life_is_probably_my_darkest_album_at_on-m-10_1622571248681.jpg)
Throwback: Mary shared: 'My Life is probably my darkest album, at one of the darkest times I've had,' saying: 'Most of the times I just was just depressed and didn't want to live'
![Little Mary: During the trailer she also looked back at her hardscrabble childhood much of which was spent in a housing project in Yonkers](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708477-9641303-Little_Mary_During_the_trailer_she_also_looked_back_at_her_hards-m-12_1622571304984.jpg)
Little Mary: During the trailer she also looked back at her hardscrabble childhood much of which was spent in a housing project in Yonkers
'In the neighborhood we lived in it's like prison,' she said in the trailer. 'There was a lot wrong and there was a lot - I needed to get out. That's why I had that pen.'
Mary frequently spoke about the solace she took in work saying: 'The only thing I think that kept us guided was the music. It just saved you.'
Her confessions were interspersed with audio clips of her singing as well as concert footage of her delighting legions of fans.
During one gig she told the crowd: 'If you're here tonight and you're a Mary J. Blige fan, you have been tested, you have been tried and you have been proven.'
!['That's why I had my pen': 'In the neighborhood we lived in it's like prison,' she said in the trailer: 'There was a lot wrong and there was a lot - I needed to get out](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708461-9641303-_That_s_why_I_had_my_pen_In_the_neighborhood_we_lived_in_it_s_li-m-15_1622571355391.jpg)
'That's why I had my pen': 'In the neighborhood we lived in it's like prison,' she said in the trailer: 'There was a lot wrong and there was a lot - I needed to get out
!['It just saved you': Mary frequently spoke about the solace she took in work saying: 'The only thing I think that kept us guided was the music'](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708541-9641303-_It_just_saved_you_Mary_frequently_spoke_about_the_solace_she_to-m-17_1622571427986.jpg)
'It just saved you': Mary frequently spoke about the solace she took in work saying: 'The only thing I think that kept us guided was the music'
![Superstar: Her confessions were interspersed with audio clips of her singing as well as concert footage of her delighting legions of fans](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708371-9641303-Superstar_Her_confessions_were_interspersed_with_audio_clips_of_-m-26_1622571524609.jpg)
Superstar: Her confessions were interspersed with audio clips of her singing as well as concert footage of her delighting legions of fans
![Warm words: During one gig she told the crowd: 'If you're here tonight and you're a Mary J. Blige fan, you have been tested, you have been tried and you have been proven'](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708401-9641303-Warm_words_During_one_gig_she_told_the_crowd_If_you_re_here_toni-m-28_1622571567409.jpg)
Warm words: During one gig she told the crowd: 'If you're here tonight and you're a Mary J. Blige fan, you have been tested, you have been tried and you have been proven'
She could be briefly glimpsed in more relaxed moments as well such as one shot where she settled down to a pair of birthday cakes.
Other performers were also seen throughout the trailer praising Mary including Sean 'Diddy' Combs who said: 'Nobody sounds like her.'
Mary's friend Taraji P. Henson, who starred with her in the 2009 comedy film I Can Do Bad All By Myself, spoke about her impact too.
![Yum: She could be briefly glimpsed in more relaxed moments as well such as one shot where she settled down to a pair of birthday cakes](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708905-9641303-Yum_She_could_be_briefly_glimpsed_in_more_relaxed_moments_as_wel-m-30_1622571688860.jpg)
Yum: She could be briefly glimpsed in more relaxed moments as well such as one shot where she settled down to a pair of birthday cakes
![Dashing: Other performers were also seen throughout the trailer praising Mary including Sean 'Diddy' Combs who said: 'Nobody sounds like her'](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708463-9641303-Dashing_Other_performers_were_also_seen_throughout_the_trailer_p-m-32_1622571726718.jpg)
Dashing: Other performers were also seen throughout the trailer praising Mary including Sean 'Diddy' Combs who said: 'Nobody sounds like her'
![Her side: Mary's friend Taraji P. Henson, who starred with her in the 2009 comedy film I Can Do Bad All By Myself, spoke about her impact too](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708399-9641303-Her_side_Mary_s_friend_Taraji_P_Henson_who_starred_with_her_in_t-m-34_1622571779848.jpg)
Her side: Mary's friend Taraji P. Henson, who starred with her in the 2009 comedy film I Can Do Bad All By Myself, spoke about her impact too
'She made it okay for people to say: "It's all right to be me,"' said Taraji and Alicia Keys added: 'We still don't get to see that a lot, you know, still.'
In addition to appearing in the film Diddy also happens to be one of the producers and Quincy Jones serves as an executive producer.
Directed by Vanessa Roth who was a producer on the Oscar-winning short documentary Freeheld, Mary's new movie will drop on Amazon Prime on June 25.
![There's Alicia: 'She made it okay for people to say: "It's all right to be me,"' said Taraji and Alicia Keys added: 'We still don't get to see that a lot, you know, still'](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708413-9641303-There_s_Alicia_She_made_it_okay_for_people_to_say_It_s_all_right-m-36_1622571804779.jpg)
There's Alicia: 'She made it okay for people to say: "It's all right to be me,"' said Taraji and Alicia Keys added: 'We still don't get to see that a lot, you know, still'
![Mary's collaborators: In addition to appearing in the film Diddy also happens to be one of the producers and Quincy Jones serves as an executive producer](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708389-9641303-Top_talent_In_addition_to_appearing_in_the_film_Diddy_also_happe-m-39_1622571858872.jpg)
Mary's collaborators: In addition to appearing in the film Diddy also happens to be one of the producers and Quincy Jones serves as an executive producer
![Incoming: Directed by Vanessa Roth who was a producer on the Oscar-winning short documentary Freeheld, Mary's new movie will drop on Amazon Prime on June 25](https://i.dailymail.co.uk/1s/2021/06/01/19/43708507-9641303-Incoming_Directed_by_Vanessa_Roth_who_was_a_producer_on_the_Osca-m-41_1622571890803.jpg)
Incoming: Directed by Vanessa Roth who was a producer on the Oscar-winning short documentary Freeheld, Mary's new movie will drop on Amazon Prime on June 25
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