Price of Justice
By Alan Brenham
4.5/5
()
About this ebook
Alan Brenham
Alan Brenham is the pseudonym for Alan Behr, an author and attorney. He served as a law enforcement officer before earning a law degree and working as a prosecutor and a criminal defense attorney. He has traveled to several countries in Europe, the Middle East, Alaska, and almost every island in the Caribbean. While working with the US Military Forces, he lived in Berlin, Germany. Behr and his wife, Lillian, currently live in the Austin, Texas area.
Read more from Alan Brenham
Game Piece Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Cornered Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsRampage: A Jason Scarsdale Novel Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Once Upon A Crime Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsEvery Silent Thing Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsNever Say A Word Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsWhen Things Fall Apart Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPrice of Justice Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsNo More Lies Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHidden Intentions Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsRampage Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Related to Price of Justice
Related ebooks
Price of Justice Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsDanger Signals Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Captivating Witness Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsProtective Duty Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Games We Play Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsThe Killer You Know Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Desperate Lies Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsEDGE OF SUSPENSE: Thrilling Tales of Mystery & Murder Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsPulling the Trigger Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsDead Man's Image: A Lacey Summers PI Mystery, #2 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsBefore the Dawn Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Killer Instinct: Crowne Security and Investigations Series, #1 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsMurder in the Family Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsRace Against Time Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Locked In Temptation Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Elixxir Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsLast Diner Standing: A Rose Strickland Mystery, #2 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsKiller's Cross Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHonor Avenged Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Poseidon's Eye Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsGunslinger Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I Never Thought I'd See You Again: A Novelists Inc. Anthology Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsBowled Over Americano: Sara and Sean Cozy Mystery Series, #1 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsProof Of Life Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHidden in Plain View Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Sin & Love Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsDeath Offerings (The Northland Crime Chronicles, Book 2) Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsShadow Protector Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsHorse of a Different Color: A Mecana Novel Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsGone Astray Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
Police Procedural For You
The Whisper Man: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5False Witness: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Finders Keepers: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5End of Watch: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Pretty Girls: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Mr. Mercedes: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5His & Hers: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5We Begin at the End Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Dry: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Silent Wife: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Chestnut Man: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Pieces of Her: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Daughter of Time Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Last Widow: A Will Trent Thriller Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Shadows: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Snapshot Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Murder at the Book Club: A Gripping Crime Mystery that Will Keep You Guessing Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Cleaning the Gold: A Jack Reacher and Will Trent Short Story Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Don't Believe It Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5A Study in Scarlet Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Girl Who Survived: A Riveting Novel of Suspense with a Shocking Twist Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5J.D. Robb: Best Reading Order with Summaries & Checklist Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Karin Slaughter: Best Reading Order - with Summaries & Checklist Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Force of Nature: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Back of Beyond: A Cody Hoyt Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Trust Me When I Lie: A True Crime-Inspired Thriller Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Find You First: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Florida Roadkill: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Fourth Monkey Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Louise Penny's Inspector Gamache: Series Reading Order with Summaries and Checklist -2020 Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5
Related categories
Reviews for Price of Justice
7 ratings3 reviews
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5This is my kind of book. It grabs you from the very beginning, has enough elements going to keep you interested and leaves you satisfied and exhausted at the end. You can sympathize with Detective Scarsdale, the loss of his wife, trying to juggle job and being a single dad to his 5 year old daughter, knowing that 2 supervisors have it out for him. You really know from the beginning who did what but it's the way they go about trying to prove it that is so entertaining. I received this from the author for an honest review and I loved it. Can't wait for his next book to come out.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5You will become invested in the characters soon after you open the book. They are those that you can relate to since the author does such a great job of drawing them out for you. This book is a great thriller, great dialogue, quick pace and adventure suspense mixed together for a compelling read...3.5 stars!
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5A recent widower, Austin P.D. Detective Jason Scarsdale is battling with personal grief and learning how to cope bringing up his young daughter Shannon alone. When Jason and his partner Sean Harris are instructed to investigate a case of child molestation, little do they realise where their enquiries will lead, or how far its tentacles’ will reach. Things seem a little brighter when Jason strikes up a friendship with co-worker Dani Mueller, but little does he know that she has her own dark secrets, which will affect his life more than he could ever have imagined. The insights into how police and law departments work, which this experienced author can give, makes this book a brilliant crime thriller.I thoroughly enjoyed reading this cleverly written, detailed and captivating story, which kept me guessing throughout with its twists and turns.
Book preview
Price of Justice - Alan Brenham
His focus is on solving the murders--until the unthinkable happens...
Recently widowed, Austin Police Detective Jason Scarsdale works to solve the murders of two pedophiles, while trying to be both mother and father to his five-year-old daughter. During his investigation, Scarsdale is forced to navigate between the crosshairs of two police commanders out to get him. Drawn to Austin Police Crime Analyst, Dani Mueller, who has also suffered tragedy, Scarsdale fights both his attraction and his suspicions that something just isn't right...
She is hiding a secret, one that could not only cost her a job--it could end her life...
Dani hides a deadly past. After her daughter was brutally murdered, Dani exacted her revenge then changed her name and fled to Austin. But if her secret ever gets out, she knows there is no place she can hide from the murderer's vicious family.
Pulled into a web of malice and deceit, Scarsdale and Dani discover the value of breaking the rules. Then just when they thought things couldn't get worse...they do.
ACKNOWLEDGEMENTS
I want to thank the following people whose help and advice was essential to this novel: first and foremost, my wife, Lillian, whose perseverance, support, and patience are most appreciated. I can't thank you enough.
Thanks to my brother, Kevin Behr, Chairman of the Criminal Justice/Law Enforcement Department of Coastal Bend College for his practical advice on modern police investigative procedures; to Tom Walsh, retired sex crimes detective with the Austin Police Department and Sergeant Scott Ehlert with the Homicide Unit of the Austin Police Department for their advice and assistance; to Jerry Pena with the Austin Police Department Forensics Lab for his help with forensics; and, to David V. Rossi, Senior Crime Scene Analyst now retired from the Harris County Sheriff's Office, for his assistance with crime scene operations.
KUDOS FOR PRICE OF JUSTICE
Price of Justice grabs you from the opening page and tells a riveting story. – Suzanne Lakin
A page turner with many unexpected twists and turns. – Joan Adamak
It’s the characters, both sympathetic and unsympathetic that have to drive a good detective story these days. Price of Justice definitely has both, which makes it a good solid mystery, with some dark undertones, that a solid fan of the genre is sure to enjoy. – Shannon Yarbrough, Amazon Top 1,000 reviewer
Price of Justice by Alan Brenham is a police procedural/who-done-it with a twist—the guilty may be innocent and the innocent guilty…Brenham crafts a complicated story with intriguing twists, turns, and subplots that foil both the heroes and the villains—an intense, fast-paced thriller that defies you to put it down once you pick it up. – Taylor Jones, reviewer
I found the characters well-developed, three-dimensional, and endearing, the story line riveting and thought-provoking. Brenham gives you a good, honest look at how frustrating a cop’s job can be and how tempting it is to want to mete out justice yourself if you are in a position to do so. It also points out how dangerous it is to assume you know who is really guilty. Price of Justice is a hard-hitting, gritty crime thriller that is truly hard to put down. – Regan Murphy, reviewer
A gripping, fast moving, and emotionally charged drama centered on well-drawn characters with genuine motives. – Kirkus Reviews
PRICE OF JUSTICE
Alan Brenham
A BLACK OPAL BOOKS PUBLICATION
Copyright 2013 BY Alan Brenham
Cover Art by J T Lindroos
Cover Photograph by Sara Biörk
Copyright 2012 All Rights Reserved
EBOOK ISBN: 978-1-626940-82-6
EXCERPT
She was a police analyst. He couldn't believe she'd commit cold-blooded murder...but he also couldn't get past the evidence.
Scarsdale pulled a photograph of Zarko out of his notebook and showed it to Loper. Have you ever seen this man before?
Loper studied the picture. Yes, as a matter of fact I have,
he said, nodding his head as he handed the photo back to Scarsdale. He came in last Tuesday inquiring about a vacancy in Building 3.
Loper smiled. On the third floor, as a matter of fact.
About what time was that?
Harris asked.
Oh, I'd say--just before dusk. Six or seven.
So, did you have a vacancy on three?" Scarsdale asked.
And we did. Apartment 310. We showed it to him and he said he'd let us know.
Walking with Harris back to their car, Scarsdale commented, Zarko never wanted to rent that apartment. He wanted to see the lay-out.
Are you thinking what I'm thinking?
Harris asked.
Yeah. Dani was the woman in Lasiter's closet. And Zarko wants to get rid of her.
So what the hell was she doing in there?
Scarsdale snapped his fingers. He recalled what Amanda had told him. You remember that old man across the alley from Lasiter's? You thought the taillight sketch he drew fit a Mercedes?
Yeah.
Guess who sold her Mercedes recently?
Aw, shit.
For Scarsdale, if Dani was involved, it complicated things. Deep down, he hoped she had a plausible explanation. Like Harris said, she was too classy to be mixed up with the likes of Lasiter and Zarko. But if she was the one, he didn't want Shannon hanging out with her. After all, she had left town kind of suddenly. If she came back, they'd have a serious chat about Lasiter's murder.
DEDICATION
To the law enforcement officers and criminal investigators who work tirelessly to protect our children
from violent predators.
In memory of my brother, Roger L. Behr,
Austin Police Department, retired.
CHAPTER 1
There's no way out of the desert, except through it.
-- Old African proverb
Looking down the black barrel of his service weapon, Detective Jason Scarsdale saw the promise of peace. Just pull the trigger, flick out the lights, and rest. He couldn't sleep, he didn't eat, and he couldn't work. He saw the fingers of his right hand on the trigger guard, his left clutching the grip. With deliberation, he shifted his hold to adjust his wedding ring so that the three diamonds were showing. She had bought it for their first anniversary and, after the priest blessed it, had placed it on his ring finger in a reaffirmation of their vows. She told him the three diamonds signified the Holy Trinity. She said the Trinity would protect them, keeping their union intact as they grew old and feeble.
Now Charity was dead. Killed four weeks ago. Dead at twenty-eight. Dead because of him.
When they first met, he knew right away he wanted to be with her for the rest of his life but it took a while to win her over. He was older and she had reservations about being a cop's wife. But in the end he had won her heart.
He tried to imagine the future without her. Family and friends said time heals, but time was his enemy. All he could see was an eternity of black emptiness. To him, each minute of each day for the past four weeks had felt the same: empty, except for the pain. Daytime or nighttime--it didn't matter.
He lifted the gun and opened his mouth, jerking violently as his cell phone rang. His eyes went to the dashboard where he kept it. The display read Home.
He stared at it, wrapping his head around that word Home. He took a deep breath and exhaled.
He laid the gun in his lap and picked up the phone.
Hello Sarah,
His eyes were riveted on the gun, his voice a flat monotone.
Jason, are you okay? You didn't eat anything. You walked out of here like a zombie.
Wasn't hungry.
Sarah was his sister, three years his junior. Despite every terrible thing he had done to her when they were kids, from putting frogs and lizards in her bed to blowing up her favorite doll with a cherry bomb, she was always there for him. She wasn't stronger, but she was kinder. She never held onto things like he did.
Trust me,
Sarah said. Things will get better. It'll just take time.
He traced the contour of the gun. Maybe, maybe not. I don't know anymore.
A few seconds of silence passed.
There's someone here who wants to talk to you.
Who?
Jason! Who do you think? Does a certain little five-year old named Shannon ring a bell?
Is she all right?
Of course. She just wants to ask you something. Hang on.
Shannon. He hadn't been there for her. Never was a good father. Now, with Charity gone, he was good for nothing. He heard Sarah calling for Shannon. Honey, your daddy's on the phone.
Daddy,
Shannon said. Aunt Sarah read me a story about Narnia.
Shannon's image filled his mind. The day in the hospital when he first laid eyes on his new-born daughter, when he first held her in his arms. She did? That's great.
When are you coming home, Daddy? I miss you.
I miss you too, princess, but I can't make it home right now. I'm working on a case. But I'll be there as soon as I can.
His police cell buzzed. He glanced at the screen. It was his partner, Sean Harris.
Sweetheart, I have to hang up. I'll see you tonight.
Daddy, will you read me more about Narnia tonight?
Of course, I will.
You promise?
she asked.
I promise,
he said and knew that he meant it.
He laid his cell down and pressed the Talk button on the police phone.
Yeah?
A moment of silence on the line and then Harris spoke up, his voice tentative. Where are you, buddy?
Scarsdale looked around. In front of him was the Zilker Park pool, closed for the season. He turned to see a single jogger pass by. His lips tipped in the tiniest wry smile at the sight of an older couple strolling along a walking path, smiles on their faces, her hand holding his arm while her head rested on his shoulder. Life just went merrily on. He looked at the gun now resting in his lap.
Zilker Park.
You feel up to working a kiddie diddler case with me?
A long silence.
Scarsdale pushed the revolver into its holster and snapped the thumb break tabs together. Yeah. Meet me at the station.
I'm already there, buddy,
Harris said.
***
Harris leaned across the seat and opened the passenger door for Scarsdale. Harris was a heavy-set man with gray stubble around the sides of his shaved head and eyes that viewed the world with a wary kindness reserved for the proven few.
As they drove away, Scarsdale sat, slouched in the seat, staring straight ahead, his clenched fists planted on his thighs. With a tremendous effort of will, he focused his thoughts on Shannon. Charity had taken the lead being a parent and role model for their daughter. Now it all fell on his shoulders, and he didn't have a clue how to do it. But starting now, no more guy's nights out, no more football Sundays. From here on, Shannon was the reason, the center of his universe.
Almost ate your gun, didn't you?
It was more statement than question and Scarsdale felt a weight lift at the plainly spoken fact.
They drove a while in silence. Scarsdale stared out the side window. The whole afternoon played in his head again, like it had so many times since patrol officers came to his door with the news. It felt strange to him because he always figured, being a cop, he'd be the one to die, not Charity.
It wasn't your fault,
Harris said.
He shot a quick glance at Harris. "It was my fault. She asked me to-- Scarsdale took a deep breath and let it out.
--go to the store. He looked out the front window then out the side.
I begged off. Too damn busy watching a game, he said.
She gave me a kiss on the cheek, asked who was winning, then left. He looked down at his ring.
I should have been the one driving that car."
How's Shannon doing?
Harris asked as they drove south on First Street, passing over Ben White Boulevard.
She cries a lot at night. But she's getting better. Sarah's going back to Waco Thursday evening, so I've got to find a babysitter. Know any good ones? Really good ones?
Haven't needed one for quite a while but I'll check with Mary. Have you asked around the department? A lot of our civilians post stuff on the bulletin board. Try that.
Scarsdale nodded, etching the task into his memory. He'd need someone available to pick Shannon up from kindergarten, too, on those days when a case prevented him from doing so himself. Someone to come in on short notice when he had one of those late night investigations working.
How many cases did Mitchell pile on your desk?
Harris asked.
Too many. You recall that citizen's complaint about kids buying porn from Blue Cloud Adult Books and Videos?
He looked at Harris.
Harris cast a sideways look of surprise at him. He gave you that piece of crap? Patrol should have handled that.
Yeah, tell me about it.
Scarsdale sat up straighter. How old is the victim in this case?
he asked as Harris pulled up to the curb before a rundown duplex. He saw three police patrol cars parked on the street in front.
Three or four, I think,
Harris replied as they got out of the car.
A scrawny brown dog barked at them, circling around behind them and approaching tentatively as they walked across the dead grass toward the front door. Scarsdale reached down, making the dog skitter away and bark furiously. He picked up a nude Barbie doll lying in the yard, brushing off pieces of grass and a small glob of dirt. Two uniformed officers, providing scene protection, stood about ten yards away from the duplex and nodded at them as they headed for the front door.
The on-scene supervisor, a uniformed sergeant named Daryl Fields, briefed them before they entered the duplex. The perv lived here. Was the mother's boyfriend. When she got home from work at seven, she caught him in the kid's bedroom with his pants down around his knees. According to the neighbor--
Fields nodded toward a gray-haired stoop-shouldered woman standing on the porch of the duplex. --Ruth Short, she heard the mother screaming like a banshee. Stuff smashing against the wall. When Ms. Short got over there, the perv was taking off out the door. Almost ran her over.
The perv's name is...
Scarsdale asked.
Scarsdale heard the loud Texas twang of a woman he assumed was the mother coming from inside the house, threatening violence against the perv.
Fields read from his notes. Olsen. Terry Wayne Olsen. White male. About fifty. Bald over brown, about six foot, around one-hundred-forty to one-hundred-fifty.
Fields nodded in the direction of the door. The voice you hear is the mother, Dory Mabry. The victim is Beth Ann Mabry, three years old.
Scarsdale opened the door--a lightweight screen door trimmed in green that wouldn't close completely. Once inside the duplex, Scarsdale saw the mother and the three-year old victim--her daughter Beth Ann, standing a few feet away. Neither looked his way.
The blonde-haired Dory gestured, using a lit cigarette to emphasize her story. That bastard better hope you people find him before I do.
She pointed with the cigarette toward the kitchen. I got me something in there that'll fix that son of a bitch real good.
She paused long enough to take a drag off a cigarette and blow the smoke out her nostrils before continuing her rant. She drowned out a female officer who was trying to ask questions.
Dory was a big woman, not fat, light-complected, and dressed in a pale-green waitress uniform. From the wrinkles and creases on her cheeks and forehead, Scarsdale guessed her age to be about thirty to thirty-five.
Beth Ann seemed small for a three-year-old, but healthy. Cute, with big blue eyes. Little rosy cheeks. Her jeans and T-shirt had some stains. Not too bad for a child her age. Shannon always seemed to find a mud hole in the backyard and wade right into it.
He looked around the room. The inside of the duplex smelled like stale cigarette smoke. Maybe a trace of pee. A large flat screen TV--brand-new, about forty-six to fifty inches--covered the far wall and made the room seem small. The room was clean, a few toys scattered around. No roaches scurrying up the walls. No trash littered around the room. Some dust caked around the window sills. An ordinary room with simple furnishings, except for the TV. He couldn't help fixating on the TV. It was a lot better one than he had.
Scarsdale moved in front of Dory, drawing her attention away from the officer, who had given up trying to ask any questions, realizing the futility of her efforts.
She stopped talking and stared at him, taking another drag off the cigarette, and gave Scarsdale an apprising once-over.
He smiled at Beth Ann as she clung to her mother's leg, half-hiding behind her. She stared up at Scarsdale. Her eyes were wide--a frightened look.
I believe this is yours,
he said, handing the doll to her. When he knelt down, she moved behind her mother around to the other leg. Dory snatched it out of his hand.
Don't.
One word, in a tone that portended an ominous warning. It ain't good for her to be taking things from strangers no more.
And Scarsdale knew better than to say anything.
The female officer looked at Scarsdale. An ever-so-slight curling up at the corners of her mouth. A rolling of her eyes as she backed away. She's all yours, Detective.
The baton had been passed. Flipping his pocket notepad open, he introduced himself.
She looked down at Beth Ann and handed her the Barbie doll. Baby girl, why don't you go over there and play with your doll while me and this here cop visit.
Beth Ann protested. Mama--
You go on now. Put some clothes on your doll before she catches a cold.
A minute or two after Beth Ann walked away, Dory turned to face Scarsdale. I swear to Holy Jesus if I catch that shitass, I'll slice and dice him,
she said, her voice subdued. She's only three, for crissake. I hope the prick rots in hell.
Scarsdale sighed. He couldn't blame her. Okay, Ms. Mabry. Tell me exactly what happened.
Dory gave him all the lurid details and Scarsdale questioned her about small gaps in her recollection of events.
Where's Beth Ann's room?
Scarsdale asked.
She motioned with her hand for them to follow her. Down this way.
He followed her down the hall and into the diminutive bedroom. Light-blue walls complete with crayoned stick figures. Pieces of a lamp were scattered around the floor. A few spots of blood sprinkled the floor near the door.
Was Beth Ann hurt?
Dory looked at him dumbstruck. Hurt? Ya mean like broken bones? Bleedin'?
Scarsdale pointed at the spots. Bleeding, like that. Whose blood is that?
Dory leaned over, looking at the blood spots. Aww, hell no. That's from him.
He readied himself to take some good notes. So you found him in here?
Yeah. When I come in, he had Beth Ann right here,
Dory said, slapping the unmade bed. He was fixin' to--
She took another drag off the cigarette. It makes me wanna puke to even think about it.
She blew out a long cloud of whitish smoke toward the ceiling. That's when I took that there lamp and busted his skull with it.
She pivoted around as if she were swinging the lamp. I caught him right smack on the head. That jackass took off for the door.
She pointed in the direction of the living room. He lit outta here, runnin' faster than a bee-stung stallion. I done grabbed a butcher knife off the kitchen table and chased after that no-good sonofabitch. But he got away before I could catch up to him.
She nudged the pieces of the lamp into a pile with her shoe. His head was for sure gushing blood. I hope I cracked his damn skull real good. He ain't gonna ever come within a mile of Beth Ann or me again. I damn sure guarantee that.
Who babysits Beth Ann when you're at work?
He did. My next-door neighbor, Ruth Short, is gonna do it now.
Do you have a photograph of Olsen?
He followed Dory to living room where she grabbed a framed picture off the coffee table and handed it to him. That's him,'
she said. Keep it.
Do you know where he may have gone? Any friends? Relatives in the area?
No. He don't have no kin around here and I never seen him with any friends but he did talk about a guy named Fergie and no, I ain't never met the guy.
Satisfied that he had all the information, he and Harris left, heading back to the office. Scarsdale had an appointment later with a prosecutor to go over his testimony.
And tomorrow, in district court, he'd testify about his investigation and arrest of a murderer named Scott Lasiter. By Friday, he figured the jury would sentence that defendant to death.
CHAPTER 2
Women do most delight in revenge.
-- Sir Thomas Browne
On Tuesday, I found myself seated in the third row of the Travis County courtroom. Scott Dewayne Lasiter was the lowlife on trial for the murder of a young girl.
That pervert sat at the defense table to my left, directly in my line of sight.
Lasiter wiped the back of his hand across his brow and glanced at the victim's mother, Susan Crowell. He looked in my direction and shifted in his seat. Nervous, Lasiter, you sick monster? I dug my fingernails into my purse every time I looked at him. I wished they were digging into his eyes instead.
Today Susan's worst nightmare would become a horrible reality, and I knew exactly how she felt when she walked past me on her way to the witness stand. The jurors' eyes scrutinized her every step as she neared the witness chair just like the jurors in Burton's trial did to me. That chair sat behind a white pine modesty panel, next to the judge's elevated bench. Susan would be center stage like I had been two and a half years ago.
She seemed to be trying hard to maintain her composure, but I could tell by the way she shifted in the witness chair, the way her hand alternately covered her mouth and toyed with the gold cross dangling around her neck, that she was anything but composed. Testifying was a nerve-wracking experience. No, actually, it was a terrible experience--it had been for me and it would be for Susan, too.
I figured Susan's heart must be in her throat by now. Her stomach churning so bad she probably wanted to vomit. The loss of a child was a terrible hurt that a mother never recovered from, and having to relive it in front of a room full of strangers, staring and hanging onto her every word, would make it a hundred times worse. I hoped for Susan's sake the system worked this time. It didn't for me.
My name is Dani Mueller and I used to be a defense attorney and crime analyst in Sacramento, California, under another name--Karla Engel. But all that life was gone now. Seven years practicing law and a life--a once happy life I shared with my ten-year old daughter, Katarina--wiped away by a maniac's sick frenzy, a maniac named Doyle Burton.
Before I left California, I filed a petition for a name change under California's Safe at Home Act. The Act permitted a confidential name change if I could show I was a victim of a stalker. In my case, it was the entire Burton family--Doyle's mother, Mattie, his half-brother Phoenix Wilson, and a demented sister they called Bunny. His other brother, a psycho named Parnell, mailed threatening letters to me from prison until the warden put a stop to it.
Everywhere I went--the grocery store, my office, the courthouse, even my home--they were there, bumping into me or making obscene and threatening gestures at me. I kept Fix-A-Flat cans in my trunk and became an expert at changing tires, fixing busted taillights and headlights. The court granted my petition, allowing a confidential name change, from Karla Engel to Dani Mueller, and sealed the records.
As I got ready to move to Texas, I set up a few rabbit trails so the Burtons would never find out where I ended up. Using the internet, I created a law office for Karla Engel near Chicago. If they discovered the name change, they'd find Dani Mueller had relocated to Del Mar, in southern California. That would at least slow them down.
Using my prior experience as an analyst for the Sacramento police, I landed a similar position with the Austin Police Department about two and half months ago. Utilizing various databases and software to analyze and interpret crime data, I developed crime series, patterns, and suspect profiles at the request of detectives working cases around the city. My personal specialty was child molesters.
But I was not here today because of my job. I came to see if the legal system in Texas functioned better than it did in California. Taking some vacation days, I sat here to see if Lasiter got what he deserved. Or would this be round two of the theater of the absurd? I hoped not.
When I took that long, frightening walk to the witness stand fourteen months ago, my entire body had shaken with a rage I'd never felt before. My heart had beaten faster knowing I would finally confront him. My face had felt very warm; I couldn't see it but I knew it was flushed. At that moment I wanted Burton hacked up just like he'd done to my Katarina.
I had felt like a zoo animal on display. Every tear, every quiver, each breath I took was studied by every pair of eyes in that room. Every word I spoke was sucked up by eager ears.
Looking around the room now, I saw Susan's husband sitting on the cushioned bench in the front row to my right--directly behind the prosecutors. His hard eyes, tightened lips, and taut jaw line told me that a terrible anger churned deep inside him too. I watched him glower at the defendant, his coal-black eyes boring holes right through the man, loathing his very existence. Yes, the air in that courtroom was thick with virulence--the Crowells' and mine. I wondered if Lasiter felt it too. I hoped he did.
I studied Susan as she leaned forward. Her eyes focused on the assistant district attorney, Rusty Tidwell. Her lips moved in sync with his question as if she was repeating it. Tidwell appeared to me to be in his mid-twenties, a baby lawyer. A second prosecutor, Madge Blackmon, sat with him.
Would you please tell the members of the jury how you were related to Amy Crowell?
I saw Susan's lip quiver before she took a deep breath and looked in the direction of her husband. When I had been asked a similar question, I'd broken down and cried. Katarina had been my life, and that pedophile Burton had taken her from me. I knew Susan Crowell felt the same way about Amy.
The quick, hateful glance she cast at Lasiter before turning to face the jury reminded me of the same hateful glance I shot at Burton when I testified. Unlike Susan, I didn't stop with the scowl. I had pointed at Burton, calling him a butcher and saying he should die for what he did. I'll never forget his sleazy expression. When the jury acquitted Burton, that snake slithered out of the courtroom, laughing at me the whole way. Justice lost that day.
Amy was my--
I could feel the hot tears Susan wiped from her eyes but she stiffened and faced the jury. She was my daughter.
Susan looked at Lasiter again, this time through tear-filled eyes. "She was only nine years old."
She said it as if asking Lasiter a question. Katarina had just turned ten when that monster Burton raped and then mutilated her with a knife.
I watched Tidwell as he picked up Amy's photograph from the table and, with the judge's permission, handed it to Susan. I could feel her anguish when she bit her lip while staring at the picture. I think that was just her way of keeping her focus and not breaking down--of coping with a horrible situation.
I hadn't fared as well when the prosecutor handed me Katarina's photograph. The prosecutor told me later that I had sat there, staring at Katarina's picture in abject silence. She didn't know what I was feeling--I mean, how could she? She'd never lost her child.
I held my breath when Tidwell asked Susan if she recognized the person in State's Exhibit Number One.
When the California prosecutor had asked me a similar question, I remembered my response--it was swift and directed right at Burton, instead of the jury. She's my daughter. She was just a little girl.
Yes. It's my daughter, Amy,
Susan replied, her reddened eyes fixed on the photograph.
I didn't