Surfing Detective Sampler: Surfing Detective Mystery Series
By Chip Hughes
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About this ebook
Welcome to the Surfing Detective Series. Here are selections from six Surfing Detective mysteries. These include the complete sketch of Kai Cooke’s first case, “The Deadbeat Dad,” and also excerpts from Murder on Moloka‘i, Wipeout!, Kula, Murder at Volcano House, and Hanging Ten in Paris. Together these six selections give readers an overview of the series and offer enough of each book to introduce the main characters, the case, and Kai’s approaching to solving it. Surfing Detective Sampler, in other words, provides a tasting menu of sorts—a way to try each mystery without expanding the waistline or breaking the bank. Bon appetite!
Chip Hughes
Chip Hughes earned a Ph.D. in English at Indiana University and taught American literature, film, writing, and popular fiction for nearly three decades at the University of Hawai‘i at Mānoa. His non-fiction publications include two books and numerous essays on John Steinbeck. An active member of the Private Eye Writers of America, Chip launched the Surfing Detective mystery series with Murder on Moloka‘i (2004) and Wipeout! (2007), published by Island Heritage. The series is now published exclusively by Slate Ridge Press, whose volumes include Kula (2011), Murder at Volcano House (2014), Hanging Ten in Paris Trilogy (2017), and reissues of the first two novels. Chip and his wife split their time between homes in Hawai‘i and upstate New York.
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Titles in the series (3)
Murder on Moloka'i: Surfing Detective Mystery Series, #1 Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Wipeout!: Surfing Detective Mystery Series, #2 Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Surfing Detective Sampler: Surfing Detective Mystery Series Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
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Surfing Detective Sampler - Chip Hughes
Critical Acclaim for Surfing Detective Series
Chip Hughes has captured the semi-hardboiled vernacular of the classic gumshoe novel, and given us an authentic Hawai‘i, believable surfing scenes, good pidgin, and realistic local characters. Like a session in smooth blue water.
Ka Palapala Po‘okela Excellence in Literature Award
Murder on Moloka‘I "Hughes’s pastiche of hard-boiled noir and the zen goofiness of surfing bliss is effortless and entertaining." Honolulu Star-Bulletin
Wipeout! "Just right for the flight to the islands. Hughes's prose flows easily, slipping into Hawaiian pidgin when needed. His series remind[s] readers of a charming new Magnum, PI." Library Journal
Kula "Zips right along . . . pacing is first-rate . . . dialogue is snappy . . . strikes a nice balance between the Hawaii of today and the film noir memes of yesterday." Honolulu Star-Advertiser
Murder at Volcano House Glides along at a satisfying clip. The landscape and characters are consistently colorful. Hughes effectively uses the native Hawaiian language throughout and provides vivid descriptions of the legendary island scenery. Entertaining Hawaiian whodunit.
Kirkus Review
Surfing Detective Sampler
An Introduction & Selections from Six Mysteries
Chip Hughes
Slate Ridge Press
Slate Ridge Press
P.O. Box 1886
Kailua, HI 96734
© 2013 Chip Hughes. © 2017 Revised Edition. All rights reserved. No portion of this book may be reproduced in whole or in part in any form or by any means without prior written permission from Slate Ridge Press.
Cover photo: Bruce Chorpita
Cover graphics and design: John Michener, Mediaspring
Surfing Detective books and e-books by Chip Hughes
MURDER ON MOLOKA‘I
MAKING OF MURDER ON MOLOKA‘I
WIPEOUT!
KULA
MURDER AT VOLCANO HOUSE
SURFING DETECTIVE DOUBLE FEATURE
VOLS. 1 & 2
HANGING TEN IN PARIS TRILOGY
HANGING TEN IN PARIS
ANOTHER PROBLEM IN PARIS
MURDER AT MAKAPU‘U
SURFING DETECTIVE SAMPLER
Welcome to the Surfing Detective Series
Here are selections from six Surfing Detective mysteries. These include the complete sketch of Kai Cooke’s first case, The Deadbeat Dad,
and also excerpts from Murder on Moloka‘i, Wipeout!, Kula, Murder at Volcano House, and Hanging Ten in Paris. Together these six selections give readers an overview of the series and offer enough of each book to introduce the main characters, the case, and Kai’s approaching to solving it. Surfing Detective Sampler, in other words, provides a tasting menu of sorts—a way to try each mystery without expanding the waistline or breaking the bank. Bon appetite!
In the sketch The Deadbeat Dad
Kai goes overboard serving papers on a delinquent father keeping company with his underage girlfriend on a borrowed boat. In Murder on Moloka‘i Kai takes on a notorious trust that stops at nothing to carve a resort out of conservation land sacred to Hawaiians. In Wipeout! he investigates the suspicious death of a big wave rider at Waimea Bay. In Kula he tracks the missing golden retriever—a famous surfing dog—of a shadowy radio pitchman. In Murder at Volcano House he looks into the death of a former geothermal exec boiled alive in a volcanic steam vent on the Big Island. And in the novelette Hanging Ten in Paris Kai probes the apparent suicide of a Hawai‘i surfer and exchange student in the City of Lights.
With this sampler readers get to know Kai Cooke, a.k.a., the Surfing Detective. A licensed private investigator in the state of Hawai‘i, Kai stands six feet-even in sandals, khakis, and aloha shirt, and has sun-bleached hair. His shoulders are broad from surfing and his chest bears sixteen pink welts left by a tiger shark. In his tiny office above a lei shop on Maunakea Street in Chinatown, his filing cabinet displays a tarnished trophy of his faded glory: Third Place—Classic Longboard—Mākaha.
Yet the stereotype of the dimwitted, inarticulate wave-riding dude couldn’t be further from Kai’s character. Surfing actually helps him solve cases: Sherlock Holmes had his pipe,
he tells us, I have my surfboard. Floating on the glassy sea I drift into a kind of trance and can disentangle the most intricate web.
He rarely resorts to strong-arm tactics, preferring instead the more contemplative style of the soul-surfer. He is an idealist who looks for the best in people and a realist who is prepared for the worst. And for the worst of the worst, he holds in reserve his Smith & Wesson .357 Magnum.
Along with Kai, a cast of ongoing characters reflects the diverse population of the Hawaiian Islands: Feisty ex-K9 cop, pet detective, and high school crush, Maile Barnes assists Kai in rescuing the famous surfing dog, Kula, and becomes an on-again-off-again love interest; Tommy Woo, attorney and jazz piano virtuoso amuses Kai with his off-color jokes and often has his back; Mrs. Fujiyama rents him office space above her lei shop and offers motherly advice; Cousin Alika Keahola, big-wave riding master, teaches Kai about surfing and life Hawaiian-style. And Kula, the golden retriever the PI and Maile rescue, becomes Kai’s most faithful surfing buddy.
Enjoy this taste of the Surfing Detective series. Again, Bon appetite!
The Deadbeat Dad
A Surfing Detective Sketch
––––––––
Six a.m. Wednesday, October fourth. Ala Wai Yacht Harbor.
Sailboat masts glow in the mango-tinted dawn. White ginger spices the balmy morning air.
I’m staking out a deadbeat dad named Leonard Souza. Souza and his seventeen-year-old girlfriend, a high school truant named Lei, are keeping company in a fishing boat called the Hōkūlani, or Heavenly Star. A friend of the girl tells me she’s pregnant. That’s why she’s not school.
I’m parked at the yacht harbor by Waikīkī’s famed Ilikai Hotel, atop whose towering wings Jack Lord posed for the opening sequence of the original Hawaii Five-O—three decades before Alex O’Loughlin and his ensemble cast remade the series. From viewing reruns of the original I can almost see the famous cascading wave that starts the show and hear the drum roll and twanging guitars as Lord’s character, Detective Steve McGarrett, turns steely eyes to the camera. That kind of glitz and glamour is hardly my lot today.
Serving papers on hostile deadbeats like Souza can be dicey business. My favorite strategy is to play dumb: I don’t mention what’s in the envelope until it’s safely in the bad guy’s hands. Though I’ll never admit to deliberately misleading anyone, sometimes my prey get the mistaken idea that they’re about to win the lottery, receive a check from an anonymous benefactor, or a reward for a good deed done long ago but not forgotten. Once the court order has been duly served, I mention this disagreeable fact on my way out. By the time any tempers flare, I’m heading for the surf. Aside from an occasional glitch, this strategy works. Usually.
I’m Kai Cooke. My business card says Surfing Detective
and Confidential Investigations—All Islands.
Above these words is my company logo—a gracefully arched longboard rider with toes on the nose. A thing of beauty. You’ll find my surfer logo in the Honolulu yellow pages and on my website and Facebook. This is no gimmick. I really do surf. More to the point, the logo works. Potential clients may forget my name, but not the Surfing Detective. Sure, I get occasional crank calls. It comes with the territory.
The Hōkūlani isn’t even Souza’s. From what I can gather, the dilapidated boat’s absentee owner allows him to live on board in exchange for repairs. He and the girl get themselves a love nest, though a foul one, rent-free. I see no evidence from my stakeout position of any repairs to this rust bucket.
In my lap lies the manila envelope I’ve come to put into Souza’s hands. It contains a court order—more precisely, a Motion and Affidavit for Post-Decree Relief
—compelling him to appear at Family Court. A year behind on his child support payments, Souza has violated the terms of his divorce decree.
Several days of turning over rocks finally led me here to the yacht harbor, hoping to catch Souza off guard and deliver the affidavit. I’m being cagey because his former wife warned me in pidgin: "Leonard like beef." Meaning: If provoked, he can get nasty.
Mrs. Souza, his ex-, is my client. I shouldn’t have taken her on. She can’t afford my hourly minimum. She calls me daily, sometimes twice a day. But how can I not help her? She and her three kids are about to lose their home. All because of Leonard Souza.
The rising sun casts its mango gleam on two snapshots Mrs. Souza has provided: one of her ex-husband, the other of the girl—their former baby-sitter.
Souza is a scurvy looking fish with salt-n-peppa whiskers and shadowy circles under his charcoal eyes, the kind of scum you want to keep miles away from your sister or daughter or girlfriend. Lei’s picture, signed in her childlike hand To Mr. & Mrs. Souza,
comes from her junior prom. She’s wearing an orchid corsage, frilly mauve dress, and an innocent smile. On her beauty shop bun perches a rhinestone crown.
This queen for a day
is girlishly slim, with the telltale curves of a blossoming woman. The pimple-faced boy in a bow tie holding her hand, a gremmie about the size of knee-high shore break, stands two inches shorter than his queen. From the nervous look in his eyes, she’s obviously too much for him. Way too much.
Over the morning’s Honolulu Advertiser I keep my eyes on the listing Hōkūlani, docked about forty yards away. In the gauzy morning light the harbor looks lime green, but beyond a distant lava rock jetty, turquoise breakers rumble in. I gaze longingly at their frothy white crests, riding an imaginary surfboard on each gem-like curl.
Sheltered from the churning surf, Souza’s motley craft is flanked by a dozen more sparkling vessels. I can see two portholes in the small, low cabin where he and the girl sleep. Since six a.m., when I began the stakeout, neither light nor human form has shown itself in those dim portholes.
Glancing at the morning paper, I flip first to the weather page to check out the waves. Despite the confused tiger shark at Laniākea who once mistook me for his breakfast—etching my chest with sixteen pink welts—I ride my longboard every chance I get. Surfing relieves the stresses of detective work.
Since tailing Souza I haven’t caught a wave in days. It’s high time. There is that body discovered in a Maui cane field—an unsolved case—to ponder. Maybe the surf will provide a clue? If there’s a swell on the North Shore, I’ll call cousin Alika who haunts the lineups at Sunset, Pipeline, and Waimea. The Star-Advertiser forecasts waves in Waikīkī at two to three feet. Elsewhere, including Alika’s turf, a paltry flat to one. Diving conditions. To Waikīkī I’ll go, then, before this morning loses its blush. That is, once I serve the affidavit.
I glance up again at the Hōkūlani, portholes still black as night. A typical stakeout. Sometimes I sit for hours like a forlorn board rider on a wave-less pond. Then—Bingo!—a set rolls in.
Watching and waiting have to be as active as my moves, or I might miss something. I keep the proverbial one eye on the case, even as I read the news—ready to jump into the game at the slightest change. Inevitably, when my vigilance slips, the case gets bungled; when my guard goes down, things turn dangerous.
So I stay alert even as I flip through the pages. Still no movement on Souza’s boat. The morning sun sends slats of light between Waikīkī high-rises, illuminating the drowsy harbor in jailbird stripes. Will Souza and his girl never crawl out of bed?
I’m worried this stakeout may drag on into my morning surf session. An hour and a half has gone by and nothing has happened. Nothing.
If Souza doesn’t show his scurvy face pretty soon, I may have to start something.
At twenty past eight, my patience wearing thin, inside the slanting cabin of the Hōkūlani a light finally comes on. Through the two portholes I see movement. Grabbing the manila envelope, I stroll down the dock toward the rusty hulk.
My white cotton shorts, polo shirt, Raybans, and rubber slippers would fit in well with the yachting crowd—if they were out of bed yet. I have a number of such outfits that I wear for protective coloration. From the few early risers I see decked out on nearby boats, my yachting attire looks appropriate. So that Souza won’t get instantly suspicious, I fold and slip the envelope into my back pocket.
Beneath my feet green seawater laps between planks in the dock. Sleek sailboats and motor yachts grace countless slips. The closer I get to Souza’s listing craft, the worse it looks by comparison. The rust-orange hull isn’t corroded metal, as I assumed, but rotting wood whose gunwale cleats and hardware send down streams of rust. On the bow, fiberglass peels up like waxed paper. Below the water line barnacles have invaded, apparently without resistance, every inch of territory. So much for Souza’s repairs.
In a moment I’m standing near the two portholes that appeared pitch black from my car. Now they’re transparent. Souza and his girl are up. I catch a glimpse of Lei, who bears faint resemblance to her photo as prom queen. Her hair is ratted, her