As You Wish
3.5/5
()
About this ebook
From bestselling author Chelsea Sedoti comes a thought-provoking contemporary young adult book about a small desert town filled with Mojave magic where everyone gets to make a wish on their eighteenth birthday. If you could make one wish that was guaranteed to come true—what would you wish for?
Rules for Wishing:
- Never let an outsider find out about wishing. (Zip your lips and throw away the key.)
- Wishes that would impact the world are off limits (i.e. no bringing back the dinosaurs).
- Do no harm. (Murder = no bueno.)
- No time travel. (What's done is done, pal.)
- No bringing back the dead. (Come on. You've seen what happens in THE WALKING DEAD.)
- NEVER BREAK THE RULES. (Seriously. We mean it. See Rule #7.)
- There are always consequences.
Most of Eldon's classmates have had their wishes picked out for months, even years. Not Eldon. He's seen how wishing has hurt the people around him. His parents' marriage is strained, his sister is a virtual ghost in their house, his ex-girlfriend is dating his ex-friend...where does he even begin?
One thing is for sure: Eldon has only twenty-six days to figure it out—and the rest of his life to live with the consequences.
Perfect for:
- Readers who like magical realism YA
- Fans of John Green, Jandy Nelson, and The Sun is Also a Star
- Educators and parents who want to start conversations about consequences
- People looking for young adult books best sellers
Also by Chelsea Sedoti:
It Came from the Sky
The Hundred Lies of Lizzie Lovett
Praise for As You Wish:
"Heartbreaking, other times hilarious, but always thought-provoking. An unexpectedly affecting book that will have readers pondering what they would wish for if given the chance."—Booklist
"Poignant… Will inspire readers to explore the question: if you could have one wish, what would it be?"—Kirkus
"An engrossing read, fantastical and believable at the same time."—Horn Book Magazine
"Depending on the reader, this novel offers different levels of intensity, starting with the everyday sort of teen troubles, progressing to difficult family dynamics, and reaching up to the ethical dilemmas wishing can create—all while being easy to read and hard to put down."—VOYA
Chelsea Sedoti
Chelsea Sedoti fell in love with writing at a young age after discovering that making up stories was more fun than doing her schoolwork. (Her teachers didn’t always appreciate this.) She now focuses that passion by writing about flawed teenagers who are also afraid of growing up, like in her novels, The Hundred Lies of Lizzie Lovett and As You Wish. She lives in Las Vegas, Nevada, where she avoids casinos but loves roaming the Mojave Desert. Visit her at chelseasedoti.com.
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Reviews for As You Wish
57 ratings16 reviews
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I received this ARC from #kidlitexchange to read in exchange for an honest review. All opinions are my own. ????As You Wish by Chelsea Sedoti. If you could wish for anything in the world and knew it would come true but had to live with consequences of that wish what would you wish for? Well, Eldon is trapped in small desert town Nevada with 25 days until his wish comes true only he has no idea what to wish for. He struggles to grow up and deal with grief and there is so much pressure wish day, prom, the end of the year football game and graduation all within the next 25 days. Come take the journey with Eldon and see if wishing and the consequences are even worth the time and effort put into them. Review also posted on Instagram @jasonnstacie, Goodreads/StacieBoren, and my blog at readsbystacie.com
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5AS YOU WISH by Chelsea SedotiThis teen book asks a lot of heavy questions in a very engaging way. Although the main character is at times a twit, teens will readily identify with him. In the desert city of Madison, Nevada, each person upon reaching their 18th birthday , enters the “wishing cave” and makes a wish. Think carefully and pronounce your wish correctly because it will come true just as you speak it. Some ask for money, some love, some a long time desire, but they all come true. Eldon’s birthday is quickly approaching. What will he ask for? What would YOU ask for? How will it affect the rest of your life?Tragedy, morality, selfishness, altruism and more are touched on as Eldon’s Wish Day comes ever closer. Friendship, family, love, despair, happiness, contentment are topics easily discussed after reading this charmingly written book. Adults will appreciate the questions and wonder about their answers as well.4 of 5 stars
- Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5This book centers around one central theme: “be careful what you wish for.” The citizens of Madison, Nevada, a small isolated desert town, have a secret: when you reach your 18th birthday, you enter a magical cave, and are granted a wish. The wish can bring you beauty or money or a skill, but there are some restrictions, such as the fact that nothing you wish for can have any impact outside of the town, in order for this magical power to stay secret.In addition, wishes are granted with extreme specificity and permanent repercussions, so that wording is critical, with the magic wish granter (whoever or whatever it is) being very talented at parsing sentences. Eldon, our main protagonist who is about to have his 18th birthday, knows, for example, that his mother wished for his father to love her, but ended up getting over him relatively fast, especially when he became an uncritical worshipper of her. Now they are stuck together. Similar stories of wishes that had a negative backlash are interspersed throughout the book in a somewhat irritating format reminiscent of the movie “It’s A Wonderful Life.”As the day of his wish approaches, Eldon agonizes over what to wish. He faces intense pressure from his mother to wish for money to pay for medical care for his sister Ebba, who is brain-dead after an accident for which Eldon irrationally feels guilty. Eldon also agonizes because he used to be the most popular and handsome and talented in his high school class, but as others got their wishes to be popular and handsome and talented, he is just ordinary, and doesn’t like it. Between whining about that and obsessing over Ebba, that is pretty much the core of the “action.”Other topics are thrown in but only explored superficially, including belief in God versus belief in magic, gender preference and the fear and social judgment that might accompany non-hetero choices, the ability (or not) of members of the opposite sex to have friendships, the value of a life and the right to choose to live it or not, and even sex trafficking. None of these, however, rise above the level of a side-note; Eldon’s self-absorbed angst remains front and center.At the end, Eldon claims to have grown up, but it isn’t convincing, and none of the other questions raised by the story have been resolved.Evaluation: Although the premise was enticing, the book itself was quite unsatisfying. The writing seemed derivative and puerile at times, and so did the plot. Frankly, I had a hard time finishing it.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5As You Wish by Chelsea Sedoti is a must read for early 2018!
I absolutely enjoyed this book and at moments couldn't even put it down. "Just one more chapter" turned into 2 or 3 or even more because, yes... I was so drawn in by the characters, the writing, and the storyline itself.
Mostly told from a 17 year old male's point of view, the reader gets a glimpse of what goes on in the small, desert town of Madison. And even though this small town is quiet, Madison still holds a very magical secret - every resident gets one wish on their 18th birthday. Now, these birthday wishes are for townsfolk only and outsiders must be kept in the dark about this special place and these magical occurrences. Protecting the town's secret is just as important as choosing the right wish, and you only get one shot at that.
Eldon, our storyteller, is going to turn 18 very soon and must decide how he wants to spend his only wish. The problem is, he doesn't know what to do with his wish and he doesn't have much more time to figure it out.
Eldon's story is a bit of heartbreak and triumph. As he tells his story, you learn to love Eldon just as much as you get frustrated with him because even though Eldon can be difficult - a jerk even - there is a very vulnerable, honest side of him that is painfully real. Basically, give him a fair chance to prove himself... he may surprise you in the end.
One element of As You Wish, probably my favorite, was reading the histories of the wishes of the people of Madison. The way these brief stories were written and woven in were fantastic. As the reader, you truly get a sense for the town of Madison and the uniqueness of each wish. Nothing really is as it seems.
As mentioned, I very much enjoyed As You Wish. It was quick, fun, yet full of depth. I was left feeling inspired and moved.
I gave As You Wish 4/5 stars
Thank you Netgalley and Sourcebooks Fire for a copy of As You Wish in exchange for my honest feedback and review. - Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The title caught my eye because it is a well known quote from the movie "The Princess Bride". But when I think of Madison, I think of Wisconsin, not Nevada so that was a mental correction I found myself needing to make early in the novel.I found the characters and story compelling enough to keep me turning the pages.In Madison, NV when you turn 18, you get to make one wish (subject to certain rules) in the wish cave. The wishes always come true in some form--but not always in the way that people think they will. Some people wish for money, some for sports success, some for love. It does make the reader think about what he/she would wish for if given the opportunity.Eldon is almost 18 and doesn't know what to wish for. His mother would like him to wish for money because she is convinced that throwing enough money at her daughter will cure her of the brain-dead state she's been in ever since the car accident. At the request of his school counselor, Eldon does some research into wishes other townspeople have made.
- Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5In the small desert town of Madison, everyone is granted one wish when they turn 18. Eldon, struggling with his decision, can only see how the townspeople are full of regrets.I thought this was an interesting premise but the characters were very stereotypical. The book also became very preachy towards the middle, which was off putting. Even though the book wasn't for me, I think pre-teens will enjoy it.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Oh my gosh. I loved this book. I did not want it to end but couldn’t put it down. I wish I had written this book. I also want to quote Holden Caulfield in Catcher in the Rye, “what really knocks me out is a book that when you’re all done reading it, you wish the author that wrote it was a terrrifc friend of yours and you could call him up on the phone whenever you felt like it.” This is how this book made me feel. I wish I could call up Chelsea Sedoti and talk to her about her book. It was such an intriguing concept, people living in a town where they get to make a wish on their 18th birthday knowing it would come true. This book is reminiscent of John Green and Sarah Dessen. I loved the character development and Eldon was hard to like at some moments but I still empathized with him. I was proud of his choice for his wish. I look forward to reading more of Sedoti’s books.
- Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Review of Advance Reader CopyIn the sandy desert town of Madison, Nevada, young people wait expectantly for their eighteenth birthday. On that day, they visit the wishing cave . . . and whatever they wish for comes true.Torn about his soon-to-be-birthday-wish, Eldon Wilkes sees the aftermath of wishes come true all around him. Can he devise a wish that will make people happy? One that won’t disintegrate into regret? Can this wish make him happy? And just what is happiness, anyway? Whatever happens, Eldon has very little time to decide about his wish . . . and then to live with it for the rest of his life.As the story unfolds, it becomes more of a coming-of-age tale than a mystery surrounding the wishing cave. Well-developed characters populate the engaging narrative, and the town becomes a silent character as its unhappy, regretful residents interact with each other. But many of the young people, especially Eldon, are unlikeable and continually make questionable decisions. Additionally, the constant use of unnecessary vulgar language is a disservice to the unfolding narrative and is likely to be off-putting for many readers.
- Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Madison is a tiny town in the middle of nowhere. It has one thing that is very special to its residents, however. On their 18th birthdays, they get to make a wish. The wish can be for anything they want, so long as it does not affect the world outside Madison. But Eldon, as he approaches his wish day, realizes that the wishes never seem to turn out exactly as the people making them intended, and in no way are making people happy. Still, it is the most important day of his life, and people are pressuring him about his decision.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Just one wish. We've all imagined it: getting the chance for one wish that can come true, with the possibility of it changing your whole life. What would you do with it? Suspend your belief and dive into this coming-of-age-novel, where in the whole town of Madison, Nevada, you get granted one wish on your eighteenth birthday. This wonderful book totally gripped me, and I flew through it in 2 days, totally believing that this town in the middle of the desert had a wishing cave and this premise could unfold for teens who live there. But the cost of choosing your wish isn't taken lightly. This book grapples with many themes of life and death, greed and loss, how happiness for yourself doesn't necessarily mean happiness for those around you. I wanted desperately to find out what Eldon, who has 25 days before his 18th birthday, is going to do with his wish, and he goes on a mission to understand others' wishes before he makes his own decision. His character is complicated by his relationships with his friends, his parents, and the sister who he desperately misses but is lying in a nursing home. It was also refreshing to read a book with the main character being a male with real emotions, showing deep thought, and strong friendships.Chelsea Sedoti has written such a thought-provoking novel with wonderfully realistic flawed characters, and I hope it doesn't get lost in the sea of fantasy YA novels that are coming out at the same time (as much as I love what I am seeing there too).Thank you to Sourcebooks for my early copy. This book is a real treat.
- Rating: 1 out of 5 stars1/5I am putting this down at 25% and marking it DNF for several reasons:1. The writing style. It was slow and repetitive which made it quite boring, in my opinion. Which was so disappointing because I liked Chelsea Sedoti's previous book, The Hundred Lies of Lizzie Lovett. In that book, I enjoyed how the secrets were slowly revealed and how the concept of perfect is fake. This book seems to have kind of the same motivation with the main character, Eldon, which I will get to in the next point.2. Eldon. The main character, the only perspective the story is told, and the tragic teenager. He was an all-star football jock with a great girlfriend and a great family in his small town but then he falls from glory. His girlfriend wishes to be prettier and dumps him. His sister is dead (or dying/in a coma? It's kind of unclear at this point) and he is no longer the all-star athlete as other teammates have wished to be the best. His history has darkened his future, I get it. But I found him to be profoundly irritating. He has the extraordinary opportunity to make any wish he wants for his 18th birthday and he hates it. I get that other people's wishes have had a negative effect on his life but he is actively rebelling and avoiding making the choice of what wish to make, but it does not do anything to prevent him from turning 18. This story seems to be more about how he is the bitterly angry victim rather than the underdog hero.3. His parents. I understand that they too are under a tremendous amount of financial stress, however, I think the author is trying too hard to make them (one in particular) either the scapegoat or the villains. The guilt trips and the manipulations are slightly redeeming when their wish history is revealed, however, it is still a little bit of overkill.In conclusion, I did not like this book. It's taken me 3 weeks of debating whether or not I should pick it back up again before I finally decided to let bygones be bygones. I am not writing off (pun intended) the author, Chelsea Sedoti. I am just going to be the opposite of Eldon and be optimistic that her next book will be better.Please note: An electronic copy of this book was generously provided for free by the publisher via Netgalley in exchange for an honest review.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The town of Madison allows everyone, on their 18th birthday, to make a wish. There are some stipulations, of course, and rules to follow, but mostly anything goes. People have wished for lots of money and for love. Eldon has 25 days until his birthday and he has no idea what he wants to wish for. His mom strongly urges him to think of his family when he wishes but he still isn't sure what to wish for. I think Eldon is a very complex character who really has some issues. He is struggling in his life with more than just figuring out what to wish for. It seems so simple but it's not. It's a very interesting thought, if you could wish almost anything, what would you wish for? Eldon does lots of research about people and their wishes and how it turns out.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The ending was a bit of a let down but overall, this was an interesting read.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/54.5 stars
As You Wish by Chelsea Sedoti is a clever, well-written young adult novel that is quite thought-provoking.
The small town of Madison, NV has a secret its residents must protect: everyone gets to make a wish on their eighteen birthday and each wish comes true. With his eighteenth birthday fast approaching, Eldon Wilkes is agonizing over what to wish for. He knows what his mom would like him to request but he also knows the wish won't make the difference she thinks it will. His principal is a wanna be psychologist who loves to hand out advice and he recommends Eldon talk to the other residents about their wishes to get a feel for how well their lives turned out when their wishes were granted. With the help of his best friend, Merrill Delacruz and their new friend, Norie Havermayer, Eldon tries to decide whether or not he will make his wish and if he can live with consequences no matter what he finally chooses to do.
Up until his senior year, Eldon lived a pretty charmed life. He was a popular football star with a gorgeous girlfriend. After an unexpected personal tragedy, he lost the girl and months later, he is still jealous over her new relationship. Eldon struggles with anger issues despite counseling and helpful advice. He is initially not easy to like but over the course of the novel, he matures and changes as he gets to know the other residents in town. Eldon remains far from perfect, but he becomes more self-aware which in turn makes him much more sympathetic and likable.
The wish element of the storyline is very well executed. Several of the wishes that have been granted over the years ended with unexpected consequences and many residents have regrets about their wishes. Seeing so much unhappiness makes Eldon's decision even more difficult and as his wish day approaches, he is even more confused than ever. He makes an ill-fated choice that takes his wish decision out of his hands yet he still remains conflicted about the ability to make a wish. Not everyone is happy with his final decision but Eldon will surprise everyone with how he chooses to handle the aftermath of his choice.
As You Wish by Chelsea Sedoti is a poignant, thought-provoking young adult novel that is quite unique. The storyline is entertaining and surprisingly insightful but Eldon's journey is what makes the story so compelling. Will he transform from a self-absorbed and arrogant jock into a thoughtful young man who finally faces the consequences of his decisions? - Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5**Book Review**I picked up As You Wish on a whim, so I had no expectations what so ever about the book. I was pleasantly surprised by how much I enjoyed reading this. From the first page, the narrative was enjoyable and funny. I like this style of writing that is so easy and fast to read. Kind of like a conversation. Eldon is a sympathetic loveable character. Imagine living in this town knowing your entire life that this choice is coming your way. Like the person who accidentally wished so badly? That wish destroyed that person's life, or rather, that person had no opportunity to live any kind of good life at all. I keep thinking about how terrible that is. Maybe the wishes aren't so great after all? What will Eldon do? After he wishes, how would you feel if you had not wished yet? Relieved or angry?
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5As You Wish comes from the perspective of Eldon, a cute, funny, 17 year old in Madison, NV. He is turning 18 in 25 days and then he'll get a wish. The first chapter is intriguing. What's Eldon's secret? In Madison, a town of secrets, everyone gets 1 wish. The enormity of this upcoming, life-changing event presses down on him. The story is well-written and feelings are real. Several characters are introduced, such as Merrill, the best friend, and Eldon's younger sister, Ebba. Where is she? What happened to her? The reader's interest is continually piqued with the stories of how wishes have been granted to other people in the town. "It's human nature to fixate on the path not taken rather than the one you're walking." Halfway through the book, religion is introduced and mildly linked to wishing, but it's not too distracting. As You Wish is about temporary fulfillment, guilt, regret, family, true friends, and finding yourself. "Is there really such a thing as the perfect wish?" And, as a bonus, the football team names are genius!
Book preview
As You Wish - Chelsea Sedoti
ALSO BY CHELSEA SEDOTI
The Hundred Lies of Lizzie Lovett
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Copyright © 2018 by Chelsea Sedoti
Cover and internal design © 2018 by Sourcebooks, Inc.
Cover design by Connie Gabbert
Sourcebooks and the colophon are registered trademarks of Sourcebooks, Inc.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be reproduced in any form or by any electronic or mechanical means including information storage and retrieval systems—except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles or reviews—without permission in writing from its publisher, Sourcebooks, Inc.
The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious or are used fictitiously. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.
All brand names and product names used in this book are trademarks, registered trademarks, or trade names of their respective holders. Sourcebooks, Inc., is not associated with any product or vendor in this book.
Published by Sourcebooks Fire, an imprint of Sourcebooks, Inc.
P.O. Box 4410, Naperville, Illinois 60567-4410
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Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data
Names: Sedoti, Chelsea, author.
Title: As you wish / Chelsea Sedoti.
Description: Naperville, IL : Sourcebooks Fire, [2018] | Summary: In Madison, a small town in the Mojave Desert, everyone gets one wish that will come true on his or her eighteenth birthday, and Eldon takes his very seriously.
Identifiers: LCCN 2017008282 | (13 : alk. paper)
Subjects: | CYAC: Wishes--Fiction. | Magic--Fiction. | Friendship--Fiction. | Family life--Nevada--Fiction. | Nevada--Fiction.
Classification: LCC PZ7.1.S3385 As 2018 | DDC [Fic]--dc23 LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2017008282
Contents
Front Cover
Title Page
Copyright
Chapter 1
Chapter 2
Chapter 3
Chapter 4
Chapter 5
Chapter 6
Chapter 7
Chapter 8
Chapter 9
Chapter 10
Chapter 11
Chapter 12
Chapter 13
Chapter 14
Chapter 15
Chapter 16
Chapter 17
Chapter 18
Chapter 19
Chapter 20
Chapter 21
Chapter 22
Chapter 23
Chapter 24
Chapter 25
Chapter 26
Chapter 27
Chapter 28
Chapter 29
Chapter 30
Chapter 31
Chapter 32
Chapter 33
Chapter 34
Chapter 35
Chapter 36
Chapter 37
Chapter 38
Chapter 39
Acknowledgments
A Sneak Peek at The Hundred Lies of Lizzie Lovett
About the Author
Back Cover
For my mom, who gave me enough opportunities that I never needed wishes.
Chapter 1
Welcome to Madison
The trick is to be boring.
No one likes being bored, yeah? If a place is boring, you’re not gonna stick around. You’re not gonna ask any questions.
That’s the way we like it.
It doesn’t take much effort, because Madison looks totally ordinary. Just another dusty, desert town on Nevada State Route 375, the fastest way to get from nowhere to nothing. The kind of place you wanna leave as quick as you can.
The thing is, Madison isn’t ordinary.
The couple in the car doesn’t realize that. They’re freaking clueless, and part of my job is keeping them that way. The other part is pumping gas.
After I get the nozzle into the tank and press the right buttons, I wander to the driver’s side window and check them out.
The woman in the passenger seat won’t be a problem. She has a blank look on her face. I see that expression all the time. Road trip daze. There’s too much sameness in the desert, and after a while, it overwhelms you.
The driver, well, he’s another story. He’s studying a map, an actual paper map. Who even uses those anymore? Especially out here, in the middle of the Mojave, where there’s only one road to get you wherever you’re going. He’s gazing at the map as if it’s going to tell him the meaning of life and he already knows he won’t like what he hears.
The guy rubbed me the wrong way from the start. When they first pulled up to the gas pump, he called me son. It’s one of my pet peeves. I don’t go around calling random dudes dad.
Full service gas stations are rare these days,
the guy says now, barely glancing up from the map.
Maybe he’s trying to be nice, make casual conversation. If so, he failed. He’s got this superior tone, like Madison is some backwoods town and I offered to cook up roadkill for dinner.
We’re old-fashioned around here,
I reply with a smile. And it’s a goddamn charming smile. I know it is. That’s why I was hired in the first place.
The guy isn’t charmed though. He keeps studying his map while I grin at nothing, feeling like the biggest jackass in the world.
I’d be straight with him if I could. Be like, "Dude, I know you’d rather pump your own gas, and believe me, I’d be happy to let you. But this is my job, so let’s get through this without being dicks to each other." That’s not how this works though.
Nope, Rule #1 of working at the gas station is avoid honesty at all costs. That’s also Rule #2 and Rule #3.
So I pump the couple’s gas, smile a lot, and try to make pleasant conversation. Hope my blond hair and blue eyes and straight teeth convince them I’m some harmless all-American kid, someone they can trust. The goal is to keep their attention on me so they don’t look around and suspect that Madison is more than just a quiet, desert town.
For the record, my job sucks.
This heat is a nightmare,
the guy mutters.
I almost laugh. It’s still spring, still hovering around ninety-five degrees. This guy doesn’t have a clue about heat.
You must not be from around here,
I say, keeping my tone light, pleasant.
No, thank God.
Original suspicion confirmed: this dude is a prick.
I clench my jaw. Then I glance at the gas pump behind me, as if that’s gonna speed up the progress. The tank is probably only half-full. I bet the guy in the car would call it half-empty.
Where you headed?
I ask.
He still doesn’t look up from the map. His words are clipped. My wife wants to see a UFO.
The woman turns from the window and frowns at her husband. I feel bad for her. I’m guessing he isn’t exactly a joy to live with.
You’re going to Rachel,
I say. Keep on this road, and you won’t miss it.
The guy still doesn’t put away his map.
Unless these two decide to do a little off-roading in their compact sedan, they aren’t going to get lost. The map is about as pointless as a parka out here. I’m not exaggerating.
The woman looks past her husband and smiles at me. I read about a restaurant in Rachel. Where all the UFO hunters go?
Yep. The Little A’Le’Inn.
Cute,
the man says dryly.
The woman ignores him. They say you can see strange things there at night.
This is a strange part of the country,
I tell her, and it’s not a lie.
What about you? Have you seen anything?
She leans over her husband, over the map, to see me better.
I could tell you…
I say. But don’t be surprised if guys in black SUVs pull you over for a little debriefing.
Really?
she asks, her eyes shining.
I wink at her. She smiles again. Maybe blushes a little, even though she’s old enough to be my mom.
Most of the traffic through Madison comes from people like this. They stop here on the way to Area 51. Apparently, they’re under the impression the government has UFOs parked off the highway or something. Sometimes, I see the same people on their return trip, all sad because they found out Rachel is just a big tourist trap.
Newsflash: there’s nothing to see at Area 51. Unless you’re looking for cheap alien merchandise and a bunch of conspiracy theorists. I’ve lived in Madison my whole life, and guess how many times I’ve seen a mystery object in the sky? Zero. We’ve got plenty of secrets around here, but they don’t have anything to do with extraterrestrials.
I have a friend who got into Area 51 once,
I tell the woman.
Her husband sighs. The woman leans even farther over him. She’s practically in his lap. What happened?
I look around for a second, as if I’m worried someone might overhear us, then duck down to the level of the window and lower my voice. "He came back with all these stories. I won’t even repeat them. There are things out there in the desert though. Things no one wants us to know about."
The woman’s eyes widen. She loves it. "You can’t tell us anything?"
Look,
I say, furtively glancing around again. My friend ended up leaving town in the middle of the night. Left a note saying he was moving to Vegas, had an aunt living there or something. We haven’t seen him since. I’m not saying anything bad happened to him. But none of us ever heard him mention an aunt before.
Because there isn’t an aunt in Vegas. There isn’t a friend either. I can tell from the guy’s sour expression he knows my story’s bullshit. The woman probably does too, but she’s having fun playing along. She settles back in her seat, satisfied. Her husband finally folds the map.
I look at the gas pump again, wish it would hurry, wish the couple hadn’t pulled in needing a full tank. Wish Moses Casey, my boss, would stop being so stingy and update the equipment so it isn’t so freaking slow.
Seconds tick by. A gust of wind rattles the gas pump, blows sand into my eyes. The man taps his fingers on the steering wheel and gazes out the window, examining the sun-bleached buildings that line Madison’s main street.
I wonder if anyone else in Madison is hiring. This gas station routine is getting real old.
Tell me, son,
the guy says suddenly. Where do you pray around here?
I hesitate. What’s this dude talking about?
Pray?
Yes, pray. Worship. Whatever. Where are your churches?
Are you missionaries?
I mean it as a joke, but it doesn’t come out that way. It sounds like I’m stalling, which I am.
I’ve just never seen a town without a church,
says the guy.
My mouth feels full of dust. I swallow hard. I have absolutely no good answer to his question. But I pull myself together, flash a smile, act like I’m totally chill. The more confident you act, the less likely anyone is to suspect you’re lying through your teeth.
Maybe you should get your eyes checked. You drove right by one.
No, we didn’t.
I think I know this town better than you.
The man frowns. He stares at me. I stare back. A lifetime passes. I fight the urge to wipe my sweaty palms on my jeans.
Then I hear the sweetest sound in the world: the click of the gas pump. The tank is full. I quickly complete the transaction, saying all the right things, telling the couple I hope they have a good trip, hope they spot a UFO.
Just stay out of Area 51,
I say, winking at the woman again. She laughs.
I watch their car retreat from Madison, flying past Joshua trees and kicking up dust. And the whole time I’m thinking, Stupid, stupid, stupid.
What if they come back through town? What if they look for the church?
I know exactly what’ll happen if they look for the church. They won’t find it. Because it doesn’t exist. They’ll wonder why I’d lie about something like that. They’ll ask questions.
I should have told them the town is too small for a church, that we run services out of someone’s home or something. I mean, pretty much anything would’ve been better than claiming we have an invisible church on Main Street. You can’t miss it. It’s over there between Santa’s workshop and the unicorn corral.
The guy caught me off guard, with his son and his map. I’ve worked at the gas station since I was fifteen, and I’ve answered all sorts of strange questions, stuff like, How do you keep cool around here? (Air-conditioning.) And, Is the alien jerky really made of aliens? (No.) And, Is this one of those small towns where everyone’s married to their sister? (Why would someone even ask that?) But no one’s ever asked about churches.
Who drives around the desert looking for churches anyway?
I tuck the two-dollar tip into my pocket and lean against the gas pump, casual, though I feel pretty edgy. I watch the road, wait for the next car, though I doubt there’ll be one. Not two in one shift.
Where do you pray? Of all the things to ask.
I briefly wonder what would’ve happened if I told the truth. If I’d laughed and said, This is Madison. What the hell do we need churches for?
Because no matter how it appears, Madison isn’t like other towns. Not at all.
I’m not talking about aliens or anything ridiculous like that. No, the unusual thing about Madison, what we work hard to make sure no outsiders find out, is that everyone here gets to make a wish.
Mine is in twenty-six days.
Chapter 2
Countdown: 25 Days
I should be freaking ecstatic. That’s how it’s supposed to go, at least. The closer it gets to your wish day, the more hyped you’re supposed to get. Everyone goes on and on about what an honor it is, how lucky we are to live in a place where wishes come true.
And everyone wants to know what you’re gonna wish for. Like, the whole town gets on your case about it. They’re all, Make it good. You only have one shot. As if somehow, that detail may have slipped your mind.
Which is why I’m on the fence about going to the hot springs. It’s Saturday, so half the school will be there. And instead of having a few beers and chilling, I’ll have to deal with everyone being up my ass asking what I’m going to wish for.
The weird thing is, a year ago, I would have thrived on the attention.
In the end, I decide to go to the hot springs anyway. Of course I do. How else are you gonna pass time in Madison on a Saturday night?
I’m about to open the front door when my mom calls my name from the kitchen.
What?
I shout back, hand still on the knob, ready to bolt.
Come here, please.
I sigh.
Ma’s at the kitchen table, cutting coupons. It’s become her favorite hobby, though far as I can tell, it has yet to save us money.
I lean against the doorframe, trying to make it clear I’m not committing to a lengthy conversation. Maybe she’ll get the hint, see I’m on my way out.
Sit down for a minute,
she says.
Or maybe not.
Something about couponing gets Ma all amped up to lecture me. I’m definitely not in the mood. But if I blow her off, she’ll launch into the I-gave-birth-to-you crap, and I’m even less in the mood for that. I slide into the chair across from her.
Eldon,
she says, I think we should talk about your wish.
Right now?
Thing is, we have talked about it. We’ve talked about it on every birthday I’ve ever had. After I turned seventeen, we talked about it once a week. Though I guess it’s more accurate to say she’s talked about it.
Yes, right now,
she says, pointedly looking at the wall calendar. The clock is ticking, kiddo.
Gee, thanks. As if somehow I’ve missed that my birthday is coming up.
I know, Ma,
I say, trying my hardest to be patient.
If you know, why haven’t you decided on a wish? You need to think about the future, Eldon.
"I have thought about it."
She puts down her scissors and looks at me. And?
And I’m still thinking.
The frown lines on her face deepen. She pulls a cigarette from the pack sitting next to her and lights it, not caring about the bits of ash raining down on her coupons. Not caring that she’s probably giving me lung cancer.
Just remember, kiddo, we’re not in a good place.
She gestures around the room with the cigarette. Scarred linoleum countertops, stacks of unpaid medical bills, appliances that haven’t been updated since the house was built thirty years ago. As if I need a reminder about our financial situation. As if I don’t live here too, don’t see how much we lack.
I know how it is,
she goes on. You kids want to wish for something frivolous. But you’re not a little boy anymore. You have to do what’s right, Eldon.
What about you? I want to ask. What about what you wished for? Instead, I say, Yeah, Ma. I get it.
She takes a long drag on her cigarette. Fine. Go then. I know you want to.
I don’t need to be told twice. When I leave the table, she has her scissors in hand again, cutting out a coupon for dog food.
We don’t even own a dog.
• • •
I step into the warm, windy night, ready to make my escape to the hot springs. But I hesitate in the middle of the yard. The light is on in our detached garage, and after a moment, I drift over to it.
Sure enough, my dad is inside. He’s standing at his woodworking bench, hand-planing a two-by-four. It’s a good day for him. He doesn’t need his crutches.
He glances over at me and smiles. You look like you just had a conversation with your mother.
Guess what the topic was?
I’d put my money on wishing.
Ding, ding, ding.
I fall onto the couch and turn on the TV, a tiny set with bad reception that my dad picked up at the pawn shop last month. Ma flipped when he brought it home. Asked which of us should go hungry thanks to his impulse purchase. I’m surprised she let him keep it.
My gaze flicks back and forth between the TV and my dad. Watching him work always makes me less tense—or maybe it’s being in the garage. I mean, it isn’t exactly paradise out here. The garage is so cluttered that it couldn’t fit a car even if Dad didn’t use it as a workspace. It’s dusty and turns into an incinerator during the summer, and I’m pretty sure black widow spiders have taken up residence in the corners. Still, I love the garage for the same reason my dad does: it’s a place to drop the charade.
I’m getting pretty sick of everyone asking about my wish,
I say.
It’s a big moment for you,
Dad replies without looking up from his workbench.
For me or for Ma?
He hesitates. He won’t say anything bad about her, I know. He sets down his planer and walks over to the couch, sits next to me. Listen, buddy, your mom only wants what’s best for you.
Bullshit. It’s not me she’s thinking about. My mom has two children, and one of them has always come first. Spoiler: it’s not me.
There’s no point bringing that up with my dad though. Instead, I say, "Whatever I wish for should be my decision."
You’re right. It absolutely should be.
I guess I look surprised, because he says, What? You thought I was going to tell you that you have to wish for money?
Well…yeah.
Eldon, wish for whatever you want.
I feel such a surge of love for my dad that if my wish was right now, I’d wish for his happiness, forever. It’s nice to know someone thinks of you as a person, not an opportunity.
I pause, trying to phrase my response in a way that doesn’t sting. If I wish for money, that still doesn’t guarantee—
I know, buddy,
my dad says. I know.
Even though I hadn’t finished my thought, I’m hit with a tidal wave of sadness. You’d think I’d be used to this agony by now, but it always catches me off guard. Anyone who says grief fades over time is a fucking liar. It never goes away. It just gets better at hiding. You never know when it’s going to spring out of the shadows and sucker punch you in the gut.
Grief is a real asshole.
The mood in the garage has shifted. My little sister’s presence—her lack of presence—fills the small space. I glance at my dad. My heart isn’t the only one being run through a meat grinder. I wish I’d kept my mouth shut.
We sit in silence, both pretending to watch TV. Some news show out of Vegas is playing. Madison isn’t big enough to have its own station. It isn’t big enough to have news to report.
If you could go back,
I ask finally, trying to rewind the conversation to a safe topic again, would you wish for something different?
Of course I would,
my dad says without hesitation.
I look at him. Wait for more. He gets up and limps to the mini fridge, grabs two beers. He hands me one and takes a long swig of his own before continuing.
When you’re eighteen, all you think of is the moment. I wished to be the best football player in the school, and it didn’t occur to me that I’d graduate in five months, and what then?
Nothing, I know. Even if graduation hadn’t ended his football career, his injury would have.
Don’t get me wrong, I love coaching. I love watching you play. But I wish I knew then what I do now.
I get the feeling most wishes are worthless,
I say.
Not your mother’s.
I’m not even going to go there with him.
Anyway,
my dad says abruptly, moving back to his workbench. You’ve got a month left to decide. You’ll figure it out.
I’m glad one of us is confident about that.
My dad turns over the two-by-four and starts planing the other side. I watch the news. Lake Mead is drying up, a new casino is being built, another pedestrian got hit by a car. Vegas news is the same every day. They could probably run the same exact show, and no one would notice.
What are you making?
I ask after a while.
He gestures to an ancient sink sitting on the ground in the corner. Finally getting that installed out here. I’m prepping wood for the base.
The sink came from the junkyard. It’s scratched and chipped and has corroded copper pipes still attached to it. Who knows if it’ll even hold water. My dad has never been able to resist bringing home random junk and turning it into a project.
I’m about to ask why he needs a sink in the garage when the door swings open and Ma steps into our safe space.
Harmon—
she begins but stops when she sees me.
She looks disappointed, which gives me an instant guilt attack. I’d bet money she’s wondering why I was so anxious to get away from her and why that doesn’t apply to my dad. Dad’s just easier to be around, but something tells me that wouldn’t exactly lift Ma’s spirits.
She redirects her gaze to my dad. Harmon, I got a call from the bar.
My dad sighs and looks annoyed. I don’t blame him. There’s only one reason a bar would be calling our house. My uncle Jasper needs to be escorted home. Again.
The bar in Alamo,
Ma continues.
My dad’s eyebrows shoot up. Alamo? What in God’s name is he doing there?
I’m surprised Alamo even has a bar. It’s a town half an hour south of us, smaller than Madison and nearly as depressing.
I have no idea why Jasper does anything he does,
my mom says. Can you get him?
Luella…
my dad begins but trails off. We all know he’s going to do it. He’ll do anything Ma asks.
If they kick him out, he might wander into the desert and—
OK, honey. Don’t worry. I’ll take care of it.
My mom nods and leaves. She doesn’t bother saying thank you.
Well,
my dad says to me. Looks like my night just got busier.
You should leave him there,
I say. He’s never gonna learn if you keep enabling him.
Enabling him?
My dad looks amused.
Mr. Wakefield taught us about it last year. It was part of that whole antidrug kick he was on.
Ah, I see. Well, Eldon, you’re probably right. But it’s your mom’s choice, not mine.
Everything in our house is her choice.
My dad puts away his tools, pats his pocket for his keys. Want me to leave this on for you?
he asks, gesturing at the TV.
I consider staying and watching the rest of the news. I consider going to the party at the hot springs. Actually, I’ll go with you.
I’m sure you have better things to do on a Saturday night. I remember what it’s like to be young, you know.
He’s right. Rescuing my alcoholic uncle isn’t my idea of a thrilling time. But I hate the thought of my dad driving alone from one crap town to another. I hate that he has no control over his own life and never will. I hate that I can’t change anything for him, that the best I can offer is riding shotgun while he’s my mom’s errand boy.
Nah,
I say. There’s not much going on tonight.
I won’t turn down your company then.
A few minutes later, we pass Madison’s town limit. The desert around us is so dark it’s like driving through a void. A jackrabbit darts in front of the minivan, and my dad swerves, barely missing it.
I glance at the clock, then turn on the radio and dial to an AM station in time to hear, Live from the loneliest corner of the Mojave, you’re listening to Basin and Range Radio, where we keep an eye on the night sky. This is your host, Robert Nash.
My dad laughs. I don’t know why you listen to this.
I shrug. It’s not like I buy into Robert Nash’s bullshit, but he’s been a staple in my life since I was a kid. Ebba and I used to listen to his show together, late at night, when our parents thought we were sleeping. She’d sneak into my room, and we’d huddle under the covers, following Robert Nash’s attempts to unveil conspiracies. Ebba believed in aliens. She believed in everything.
"…talking with a Las Vegas man who’s certain he’s uncovered the extraterrestrial agenda. Who are these strange beings? Why did they contact him, not once, but on three separate occasions? And, most importantly, when will they be back? Tonight, on Basin and Range Radio, you’ll get the answers…"
I push my sister out of my mind. I listen to Robert Nash interview a dude who insists aliens are speaking to him through the hum of his air-conditioning unit.
I try to pretend my dad and I are on a road trip, heading somewhere more exciting than Alamo. I try to pretend that Madison doesn’t exist. That wishing doesn’t exist.
I’m not good at pretending.
When it comes to wishing, maybe Ma is right. I should wish for money and be done with it, yeah? No more agonizing. No more worrying about making the wrong choice. No more feeling like I have one shot, and if I screw it up, my life will be over. Just ask for cash. Live comfortably. No