Rubies and Rickshaws
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About this ebook
A beautiful young photographer, Paris Cassidis, searches for her true identity, tries to resolve her conflicting allegiances to East and West, and, after falling in love with two very different men, struggles to understand her heart''s true desire. Paris moves from one adventure to another in St. Moritz, the Taj Mahal, Kashmir and the Himalayas. Haunted by childhood memories of abandonment and terror, and tortured by what she cannot remember, she follows clues to her identity which ultimately lead to the discovery of the extraordinary legacy that her family left behind.
Vatsala Virdee
Vatsala Virdee was born in Manchester, England to parents originally from Bombay. Having grown up in the Beatles’ Britain in the swinging Sixties, and only visiting India during the holidays, at the age of 16 she found herself living in a remote Himalayan hill station after her parents suddenly moved back in the early 70’s. The clash of cultures she experienced in India, particularly at boarding school in Darjeeling, inspired her first novel, Rubies and Rickshaws. Mrs Virdee has worked with the United Nations in Switzerland since 1981 and lives in Geneva with her husband and their two children.
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Rubies and Rickshaws - Vatsala Virdee
© 2005 Vatsala Virdee. All Rights Reserved.
No part of this book may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted by any means without the written permission of the author.
First published by AuthorHouse 11/11/05
ISBN: 1-4208-8397-6 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-4670-0906-5 (ebk)
Printed in the United States of America
Bloomington, Indiana
Contents
Acknowledgements
1 Deception
2 The Snow Leopards
3 Angels and Waterfalls
4 The Palace Hotel
5 Love and Destiny at the Taj Mahal
6 Golden Organza
7 Jewels and Jealousy
8 Stars and Himalayan Nights
9 The Gold Box
10 Purple Palaces
11 The Heart of Paris
12 Reaching for Paradise
13 Himalayan Landslide
14 Dreams
About the Author
For my father, for changing worlds.
Acknowledgements
Rubies and Rickshaws started as a leap of faith which became a journey spanning several exciting years. I would like to thank all my friends, in particular, Michael Gerrard, for his technical expertise and unfailing belief in me, Andrei Dmitrichev, for his inspiration which meant so much, Cynthia Hammel, for her colourful contribution making the tough task of rewriting so much fun and my editor, Katharine Turok, whose guidance on various drafts of the manuscript carrried me to the very end. I wish to thank the Oza family for their support, my daughter, Natisha, for spearheading the marketing campaign, my son, Jasmeer, for his constructive and delightful feedback and my husband, Tejinder, for loving me.
www.rubiesandrickshaws.com
Website and design created by Michael Gerrard
www.sibleyphoto.com
Cover photograph by Kevin Sibley
1
Deception
I don’t love you,
he groaned, lingering over each word and yet he kissed her with the warmth of the sun, as if she was the only woman he had ever cared for. She knew he loved her but could not bring himself to admit it. She also knew that with every touch of their lips he was losing her.
Words without meaning, she convinced herself, I do not care. They were words for the sake of speech, words of no consequence, words that could not speak for his heart nor look into his soul or capture the sweet unsaid nothings incised in his eyes. She tightened her firm hold around his hard body. Her grip imprisoned him in her canopied bed like a helpless creature in a lioness’s den. This way he would be etched in her memory forever. She was glad – glad – they had never really made love. He would become her Rosetta stone, an ancient script revealing a rich and powerful heritage and this, she knew, would lead her to the path of discovery. He would become her dream catcher, a moment she would never forget, a past she would always remember and an emotion that would stay with her for the rest of her days.
I don’t believe what you say anymore,
she retorted as she returned his kisses more earnestly, more passionately, when suddenly a powerful sense of loss came over her. Her heart raced out of control, she could hardly breathe. Her naked body began to sway in a compelling desire for fulfilment. With every agonizing moment she waited in vain for him to take her, she waited for him to prove he loved her. She lifted her eyes and met his. When he did give her a glimmer of hope she felt betrayed by his sense of honour and integrity, his immeasurable capacity to love and his inability to tell her the truth.
Why is love so deceptive? she wondered, and chided herself for not defining the laws of love. Searching the past to justify the present, she made up her mind to leave Switzerland, her job and Alex Vadim, her first love, the only love she’d ever had in her twenty-three years.
Tell me, Alex,
she whispered, How can I feel tenderness, passion, and rage and yet so much love for you?
He folded her into his arms and their lips pressed hungrily in a fierce embrace until one obstinate tear trickled down her cheek. She ran her fingers through his lustrous blond hair and cupped his face to hers. Her long hair reflected glints of dark indigo, making him think of the waves of the rapids under a half moon. Her radiant olive skin felt soft like virgin snow powder when he wrapped his right leg over her slender silhouette and his demanding hands pulled her closer. His fingers moved over her soft shoulders, he lifted one hand to trace the indentation of her spine and shapely buttocks, finally gripping her hips close to his. How beautiful, soft and sexy, he thought. Her hair feels like silk, her scent like honeysuckle. Gazing deeply into her dark almond eyes Alex changed register and kissed her tenderly on the forehead the way a mother would kiss her newborn child. And then, to her surprise, he began to lick away her saline tear. Alex gripped her more passionately until exhaustion triumphed, until they could move no longer, until the heat was too much, until tiredness overruled their love and lust for each other.
Alex fell asleep. She sat upright, her eyes wide open. She left the bed to study him, to practice distance. He was especially handsome in his half-naked elegance as she examined the emotional network of her love in perfect co-ordination with his. Lying in her bedroom, on her sheets, in her Swiss chalet, and locked in her heart, Alex was the epitome of shameless perfection.
As she turned toward the mirror, her long thick black hair tumbling over her shoulders, her nude body glistening in the moonlight, she saw the blurred reflection of a woman in love. Remembering Alex’s masculine form pressing urgently against her, she began to imagine the moments they could have spent together. She imagined the feel of his alabaster-smooth skin against her trembling thighs. As her passion wove itself into a web of desire, she sat by the bedside and began to write for him, for her, for the times they had spent together.
How can I love a man who denies true love?
The warm night moved her to open the French windows beside her canopied bed, letting in the cool breeze. Alex stirred, shuddered, and stilled. With the silvery moon perched arrogantly in the distance, she succumbed to the harsh reality that their relationship was finally ending. When had it started, she wondered, her thoughts racing back two years to the Quarters Hotel in Kashmir. Had his love ever been true? Had he truly cherished her as he would a delicate, fragrant red rose or simply an artificial one?
Why do I burn for the attention of his heart?
The moon’s luminous streaks spread like silver threads weaving through the calm waves of Lake St. Moritz, creating a stairway, a symbolic path of no return. Its light began to play tricks on a dream catcher, made of gold beads and white feathers, an old gift from Alex, still hanging in front of her window.
As she searched for some reassurance, she solicited even the moon’s approval as she tried to make sense of her relationship with Alex and still hold onto her dreams. She continued writing.
What drives my passion only to suffer such anguish?
You do not love me and you do
You do not hate me and you do
I am everything as I am nothing
For I do not have any part of you
You conceal, you conceal
That is all I can feel
As I have never had a passion so strong
Nothing in my heart has lasted so long
Finally acknowledging their love had ended, she used her pen as the ultimate bearer of the last rites. With her adrenaline racing, she began to pen more of the truth and face confusing facts, painful facts. Feeling entirely alone, she poured her verse onto futile paper.
You disguise, you disguise.
You conceal and I confide
I look at you, pleading with you
To show me some compassion
As I am your woman
Your heart and your passion.
She meticulously folded her poem and put it into his worn brown leather jacket. Engulfed with a deep sense of loss as if she had been sent to the gallows, she prepared to leave. Nevertheless, she felt guilty for pushing him away and guilty for not telling him the truth about her past. She observed his slow, steady breathing oblivious of the hurt he must already be feeling. Shocked by her own inability to come clean, she decided nonetheless to leave him. But she knew she had no choice.
Carefully, so as not to disturb him, she slipped into a long satin gown. On a previous visit to St. Moritz, she had carefully placed, high on a ledge above the door, the key to the attic that she referred to as her private apartment. When she reached the top of the stairs leading to the apartment, her heart pounded. Stretching up on tiptoe, she found the key exactly where she had left it. A flood of moonbeams streamed into the room through the round glass window, illuminating the contents with iridescent light as she unlocked the door. Instantly, she felt that familiar elation at being on the brink of making a major decision. This time it would have to be the decision to go home.
The apartment, nestling directly under the sloping roof of the chalet, was just large enough for a sleigh bed and an adjacent shower room. The room could barely hold the large trunk, which had been tucked out of harm’s way. The wooden door opened onto two steps, barely the width of a child’s foot. Clouds of dust rose when she opened the trunk. She rummaged through its contents, until she found a gold box. It was the size of her hand, framed with tiny white rice pearls, which her father had given her the day she left home. She opened it, smiled to herself, and closed the lid, tucking it away in her bag.
She stepped into the shower. The melody of the cascading waterfalls echoed in her thoughts. Her mind drifted further into a past she had deserted many years ago. Now, with Alex out of my life, she convinced herself, I have to go back home, where I really belong. There’s nothing here for me now.
Slipping into blue jeans and a pink V-neck sweater and packing a few items, Paris Cassidis searched for her cameras. Especially her favourite Leica, it was still there and in fine shape. How long had she had it? She mused. Paris remembered purchasing it while working for Sidelines, an underground newsletter in Srinigar. She also spotted her new acquisition, the tiny digital camera, underneath it. She gathered her bags and locked the door, replacing the key where she found it. Paris made her way back down the stairs to Alex.
Opening the door to the bedroom, Paris delighted in his nude seductiveness in deep slumber and, just for a brief moment, she weakened in her resolve to leave him. Paris adored Alex, no matter how destructive this feeling could be, realising she knew, that at this very moment in time, she loved him without reservation. She would feel lost without him. She would feel empty without him. Paris had loved Alex too much, against any logic at all. Letting go of her bags, she went to him, and stood by the side of the bed. Before kissing him goodbye her fingertips reached out and traced a line along the left side of his perfect body. Paris tilted her head to gaze at his lips so full from the night’s kissing. Then she puckered gentle kisses upon his feet, a mark of great respect, as a final tribute to their love and what it could have been. This was the man who had changed her life, the man who had lived by his honour, so true to his word, so dear to her heart, so loyal in friendship, and so trusting throughout their journeys together. As this part of Paris’s life came to an end and the burden of regret began to overwhelm her again, she recalled the moments she and this maverick photographer had spent together, the moments of laughter, endearing friendship, and deep, yet unfulfilled love.
Quietly closing the door, Paris stepped out into the cool night air and looked up at the moon so full and bright appearing to float on water. She sighed with deep regret. I wish I could keep him close to me … for just a while longer … she told herself, for just a while. With tears welling, she left the chalet, hurt that he hadn’t stirred when she had bid him farewell.
Just then, moved by the vibrations of her proximity and her fierce emotions, he turned and murmured into the empty room, Paris, you know I do love you, I do. I love you, I do …
Sutton Pearce grumbled as he began to shuffle his new deck of cards. The news of Paris’s return to Cyber Media Solutions only to resign, had sent shock waves through the various communication networks and sparked gossip in the corridors of the vast open-plan offices based in Geneva. Paris’s resignation had never been on his agenda. Just when he was under pressure to hang onto his key staff, he was losing the best he had ever had. With Paris gone and no one to replace her, Sutton felt defeated, frustrated that he had taken her too much for granted, even though she had been with CMS only two years.
The deck, firmly locked in his hands, was evenly split in two and set upright. The tip of his thumb hooked around one end, and the tips of his last three fingers hooked around the other. In an effort to focus and calm his nerves, he shuffled them with perfunctory rapidity. Tapping the bottom edge of each stack on the desk to plan his next move and even up the pack, he prepared to propel them into the basketball net.
The full-size basketball net had been rigged above his office door to discourage frantic personnel from charging in. Sutton began to catapult the cards simultaneously into the net with such momentum and speed that all fifty-two playing cards scored and landed like heavyweight feathers on the floor.
The door opened. Paris entered, wearing a fitted pair of blue jeans and a tiger-print tank top.
What happened to the ball?
she teased, as Sutton opened his arms to greet her.
I got caught out. Some oversized, overpaid, dinky, egocentric birdbrain walked in while I was free-throwing my best shot. It landed on his noggin’ and knocked out the good-for-nothing ba ... !
He refrained from going into more detail. A short, stocky, dogmatic man, Sutton flashed his beady brown eyes at her and continued, he threatened to sue, so we settled out of court. I quit throwing and he quit barging in. Thought cards would be a lot safer and turns out it’s a lot more fun!
Sutton’s head resembled the ball tucked under his desk and his well-rounded stomach stirred her memories of childhood teddy bears. His foghorn voice evoked images of great maritime paintings showing searches for freighters lost in the dark. With his small feet, he kicked the cards aside. Normally