The Lady's Guide to Petticoats and Piracy
By Mackenzi Lee
4/5
()
About this ebook
In this highly anticipated sequel to the New York Times bestselling The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue, Felicity Montague must use all her womanly wits and wiles to achieve her dreams of becoming a doctor—even if she has to scheme her way across Europe to do it. A must-have for fans of Mackenzi Lee’s extraordinary and Stonewall Honor-winning novel.
A year after an accidentally whirlwind grand tour with her brother Monty, Felicity Montague has returned to England with two goals in mind—avoid the marriage proposal of a lovestruck suitor from Edinburgh and enroll in medical school. However, her intellect and passion will never be enough in the eyes of the administrators, who see men as the sole guardians of science.
But then a window of opportunity opens—a doctor she idolizes is marrying an old friend of hers in Germany. Felicity believes if she could meet this man he could change her future, but she has no money of her own to make the trip. Luckily, a mysterious young woman is willing to pay Felicity’s way, so long as she’s allowed to travel with Felicity disguised as her maid.
In spite of her suspicions, Felicity agrees, but once the girl’s true motives are revealed, Felicity becomes part of a perilous quest that leads them from the German countryside to the promenades of Zurich to secrets lurking beneath the Atlantic.
Mackenzi Lee
Mackenzi Lee holds a BA in history and an MFA from Simmons College in writing for children and young adults. Her short fiction and nonfiction have appeared in Atlas Obscura, the Boston Globe, Crixeo, and the Newport Review, among others. Her debut novel, This Monstrous Thing, won the PEN New England–Susan P. Bloom Children’s Book Discovery Award. Her second book, The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue, was a New York Times bestseller and an ABA bestseller, earned five starred reviews, was a #1 Indie Next Pick, and received a 2018 Stonewall Book Award Honor and a New England Book Award. She loves Diet Coke, sweater weather, and Star Wars. On a perfect day, she can be found enjoying all three. She currently calls Salt Lake City home.
Read more from Mackenzi Lee
All Out: The No-Longer-Secret Stories of Queer Teens throughout the Ages Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Bygone Badass Broads: 52 Forgotten Women Who Changed the World Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Gentleman's Guide to Getting Lucky Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Bygone Badass Broads: 52 Forgotten Women Who Changed the World Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The History of the World in Fifty Dogs Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
Related to The Lady's Guide to Petticoats and Piracy
Titles in the series (3)
The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Lady's Guide to Petticoats and Piracy Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Nobleman's Guide to Scandal and Shipwrecks Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
Related ebooks
The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Nobleman's Guide to Scandal and Shipwrecks Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Pride: A Pride & Prejudice Remix Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5What If It's Us Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Timekeeper Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Infinity Son Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Felix Ever After Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Emma Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsSimon vs. the Homo Sapiens Agenda Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5How Not to Ask a Boy to Prom Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Any Way the Wind Blows Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Chandler Legacies Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Love Interest Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5Fans of the Impossible Life Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Only Mostly Devastated: A Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Elysium Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Like a Love Story Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Rest of Us Just Live Here Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5A Study in Charlotte Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Girl from Everywhere Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Wuthering Heights Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsRelease Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5He Forgot to Say Goodbye Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Upside of Unrequited Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Social Intercourse Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Ghosts & Ashes Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Yesterday Is History Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5We Are Totally Normal Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5On the Come Up Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
YA Romance For You
Shatter Me Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Heartless Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Legendary: A Caraval Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Red Queen Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Better Than the Movies Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Caraval Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Summer I Turned Pretty Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5It's Not Summer Without You Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Legendborn Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5We'll Always Have Summer Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Finale: A Caraval Novel Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Unravel Me Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5These Violent Delights Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Foul Lady Fortune Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Forever . . . Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Ignite Me Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Cinderella Is Dead Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Out of Darkness Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5They Both Die at the End Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Wuthering Heights Complete Text with Extras Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Selection Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Ace of Spades Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Do-Over Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Persuasion Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Poet X Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Daughter of the Pirate King Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Destroy Me Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Giver Quartet Omnibus Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5To All the Boys I've Loved Before Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Monday's Not Coming Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
Reviews for The Lady's Guide to Petticoats and Piracy
308 ratings23 reviews
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5This book is FANTASTIC! It covers a whole range of issues like misogyny, environmental conservation, ingrained patriarchal systems, imperialism, asexuality, and the ills of women judging other women and it does so without becoming preachy or didactic. The characters are wonderfully strong and feel real. I would love to go on an adventure with both of them!I read The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue and really enjoyed that, but this one is even better! Highly recommended!
- Rating: 2 out of 5 stars2/5I loved The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue, and so I was excited to hear Felicity was getting her book. Then, lo and behold, the only part of Felicity's book I liked was when Monty and Percy (the leads in A Gentleman's Guide for those who did not read that book) popped up. It turned out Felicity was insufferable. She was mean, preachy, superior, judgmental and 100% humorless. The weird, part? Not one of those things was the worst thing about her character. No, the biggest problem was the absolute and utter disregard of history. I like a plucky girl as much as the next person, but that person has to have had some chance of existing in her time. Books that were written near the time the stories were set show independent girls who strove for things that were possible (though not the norm) in their time (see eg, Little Women, Anne of Green Gables, and for nonfiction A Vindication of the Right of Women.) No woman at the time this was set could possibly have had the thoughts, goals, reactions of Felicity, or Johanna, or Sim because they were unimaginable. There is a joke about drawing penises with hats on them on people, like they were all sitting around watching 10 Things I Hate About You the night before. Also they bandied about the word "penis", a word which a well-bred woman at the time would never have uttered and might not even have known. It would be like a Cro-Mag-non woman fantasizing about Netflix Originals. There is no context for those goals or that knowledge. Lee dropped 20th century women (essentially these were unwilling 50's future housewives) into the 19th (18th?) century. I hate when writers do that. Its so lazy and encourages laziness in readers who believe this junk. (I will note here that the ridiculousness and historical inaccuracy of characters extended to all the characters male and female. Alexander was like an evildoer on Scooby Doo. Darn those meddling girls!)This is pure YA fantasy. If you read it as that maybe it works. I don't like fantasy or YA much so take that into account Also, dragons? Puhleez. I listened to the audio, and the reader was really excellent. If I had read this in print I think it would have been a a DNF.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5I love this book! The protagonists are well-drawn and complex. There's representation galore! And the plot explores a number of important topics (misogyny, imperialism, conservation, heteronormativity) with grace and compassion. Plus there's a super-cute proto-romance.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I'll be honest- the plot kind of lost me at times, but the characters were absolutely wonderful. I had such affection for each member of the trio of girls - and I love that Felicity is not without her flaws. The book rips apart the garbage "not like other girls" trope and makes a very clear statement that feminine qualities do not equal weakness or silliness. I adored that Felicity is, as I suspected in the first book, asexual! And seemingly aromantic as well! Hooray! Representation! AND she gets to use her medical skills in a realistic and satisfying way. I really hope there's a third book in the works because there is still a lot of story left for the Montague siblings.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I enjoyed this audiobook just as much as The Gentleman's Guide. Lee writes funny, action-packed, adventurous and original YA historical fiction, and I just love her characters. Felicity, Johanna, and Sim are strong female characters, and it was fun to catch glimpses of Monty and Percy again, too.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5One of last year's surprise favorites was A Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue. It was the perfect combination of historic fiction, bawdy humor and heart throbbing romance. So this year's sequel was very highly anticipated. But, we all know how tough it can be to follow a bestselling first in a series. No worries and no sophomore slump here! This fun Victorian romp follows the adventures of Monty's sister Felicity as she tries to break the gender barrier and be admitted into the all-male world of medical school. Fun and entertaining with just the right amount of feminism.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5This is the second book in the Montague Siblings/Guide series. This was a good book but not as good as the first book in the Montague Siblings series. I felt like the story here was really unfinished and the pacing was a bit slow.Felicity spends a lot of the book running around trying to get to her ultimate goal of becoming a medical student and eventually practitioner but things are left really open at the end.I didn't feel like this story was quite as engaging as the first book. Felicity spent a lot of time preaching about women's rights which I know were (and still are) a big deal but there was so much time spent on this the book felt a bit...preachy...at points.All the above aside...I enjoyed the characters and this was a quick and easy read. The story is entertaining and fun. It's a great read if you are looking for a light Victorian novel with some subtle fantasy. There really isn't any romance in here; so if you are looking for the level of romance that was in the Gentleman's Guide book you won't find it here. This is more of a girl power book.Overall this was a good book and made for an entertaining and light read. I enjoyed it but didn’t fall in love with it like I did the Gentlemen’s Guide. I will definitely be keeping an eye out to see what Mackenzi decided to write next.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5This books was a bit better than the first. I found the story and characters more enjoyable. There were some twists I didn't expect, and the plot captured my attention moreso in this novel than the last.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I had trouble with some of the anachronisms. I feel super pedantic but the one that I simply could not suspend disbelief for was the “grapefruit-colored house”. Grapefruits weren’t called grapefruits until the nineteenth century and the pink ones didn’t exist until the twentieth! I did not actually subtract stars for that because I’m the worst for even caring about something that minor. In any case, the actual fantastical elements also threw me off a bit but I didn’t mind them so much.
I actually liked this better than the previous book! I did like that one (enough to read the sequel, even!) but this is a more nuanced plot with more complex characters, in my opinion. Good stuff! - Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5An amazing follow-up to The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue, the Lady's Guide follows Felicity Montague in the aftermath of her brother's absconding to London with his boyfriend.
Felicity is, rightfully, irritated with a lot of the world for demanding that women not work. Anywhere. She meets two more women during her adventure who tend to share the same views, and she meets men who claim to, but do not.
There is a lot to read in the pages of this story, but it was utterly fantastic. - Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Felicity wants to be a doctor in a world that won't let women be doctors. In her quest to make that happen, she befriends Simm and Johanna and together they adventure and also explore what it means to be a woman and what it means to be a friend. This novel embraces all the ways that women can be and individuals can be and what it means to accept someone for who they are.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Hugely entertaining high adventures in the 18th century. I enjoyed the first book; I liked this even better. The prickly and stubborn main character is an delight to my heart. Her constant impatience with romance is refreshing, and all of the women’s struggles with ambition vs expectations reads as deeply authentic. Pirates, cleverness, Muslim characters, same sex attractions, a really drooly dog, and all in a fast paced, historically grounded book. What more can you want? It’s excellent.
Advanced Readers Copy provided by Edelweiss. - Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Not quite as good as the first book, but very close. It was still very humorous and adventurous and I really enjoyed it.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/54.5 stars/5 stars
As spectacularly delightful as the first Montague Siblings book. Keeping my fingers crossed that Mackenzi Lee has more books to share with Felicity and/or Monty involved! - Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I was really interested in this book after finishing The Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue because Felicity was my favorite character from that book, so I was surprised to find that while I liked this book focused on her adventures, I didn't enjoy it quite as much as its precursor. Felicity manages to traverse much of Europe and more as she starts a journey at first to pursue further medical education, but she gets waylaid by other, more fantastical matters. Overall, it's fun reading, I enjoyed seeing Monty and Percy again, and, of course, I was happy to see Felicity have an adventure of her own.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Montague Siblings always manage to find the action. Felicity is out to become a doctor, despite England's refusal to let women go to school or practice medicine. So, she invites herself to a friend's wedding to meet her hero. Well, that leads her and her brother into all sorts of trouble, including dragons and pirates, not to mention bad men.Highly entertaining.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Audiobook. Muchly enjoyed this one too. It is a bit slow to get going - takes to half way before adventure really takes off. Great fun then though.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I like it!
Three strong ladies fighting dudes and kicking butt.
It was an adventure. - Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5There is a lot to praise in this book, but I'm writing this review because it's one of those books where I didn't realize how much I enjoyed it until I was finished with it. I was dreading the ending as it approached - there's plenty of narrative tension, but additionally, I was sure we were headed for something that was deeply unsatisfying in one way or another because of so many factors - the colonial and sexist mindsets of the various characters, the prominence of an aspec character (when so many stories go poorly for aspec characters), but it's been months since I finished and I just can't stop thinking about how satisfying this book was. It's one of those that really sells the happy ending well, it doesn't seem too fanciful or convenient or coincidental, partially because it's different than the happy ending that the protagonist was planning and working towards. It's a good one and it stuck with me. I'd say I was wishing for a sequel if I didn't think that saying that is a huge jinx.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I enjoyed book 2 in the Montague siblings series quite a bit! It was nice getting to know Felicity better, and I'm very pleased to see that she wasn't pushed into any unwanted romances. Much like the first book I was caught a little off guard by the plot device/twist near the middle-end- but I think I'm used to this sort of progression by now and ready for book 3. =)
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5The sequel to A Gentleman's Guide to Vice and Virtue, this novel follows Monty's sister, Felicity, as she desperately tries to make her dreams of becoming a doctor a reality. But the medical field is run by the Old Men's Club and they are gatekeeping her at every turn. When she discovers that her childhood frenemy is getting married to Felicity's idol, Dr. Platt, she runs off to Europe with a suspected pirate to crash the wedding. Things don't go at all as she plans, though, and she finds herself entangled in another adventure bigger and more dangerous than she could have imagined.I don't know why it took me so long to get to this sequel when I loved the first one so much. The adventure is a fun one, and the characters are like old friends, with some new ones along for the ride as well. Definitely recommended. You don't have to have read the first one to read this one, but why wouldn't you?
- Rating: 2 out of 5 stars2/5I loved The Gentleman’s Guide to Vice and Virtue, and perhaps that’s the main reason I was so disappointed in this novel. One of the main aspects of Gentleman’s Guide that I enjoyed was the humor, which was sorely lacking in Lady’s Guide. Instead the reader was subjected to continued preaching about feminism and how suppressed women were in that era – yes we understand that; it’s been done before and it did not need to be announced during every conversation. Felicity was such a frustratingly weak character until the middle-end of the novel, which didn’t line up at all with her courage in the first of the series. I’ll return to Gentleman’s Guide, I’m sure, but I have no interest in the rest of the series.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5I enjoyed this book so much. I cheered and gasped and couldn't put it down! There's such a lovely camaraderie between the women in the novel, and it's nice to see such positive female relationships. There is also period-typical sexism, but all three of the women manage to circumvent it and use it for their own gains in the end. Also, it's so nice to have an unapologetic Aro-Ace character in a story. Another thing I love about this series as a whole is the way that magic is interwoven with historical fact. Lee does point out that she takes some artistic liberties, but who doesn't? The way that each story seems like it's just a historical fiction novel, but slowly and believably peppers in some magical aspects like the dragons is amazingly well done. I can't wait for the next book!
Book preview
The Lady's Guide to Petticoats and Piracy - Mackenzi Lee
Edinburgh
17—
1
I have just taken an overly large bite of iced bun when Callum slices his finger off.
We are in the middle of our usual nightly routine, after the bakery is shut and the lamps along the Cowgate are lit, their syrupy glow creating halos against the twilight. I wash the day’s dishes and Callum dries. Since I am always finished first, I get to dip into whatever baked goods are left over from the day while I wait for him to count the till. Still on the counter are the three iced buns I have been eyeing all day, the sort Callum piles with sticky, translucent frosting to make up for all the years his father, who had the shop before him, skimped on it. Their domes are beginning to collapse from a long day unpurchased, the cherries that top them slipping down the sides. Fortunately, I have never been a girl overbothered with aesthetics. I would have happily tucked in to buns far uglier than these.
Callum is always a bit of a hand wringer who doesn’t enjoy eye contact, but he’s jumpier than usual tonight. He stepped on a butter mold this morning, cracking it in half, and burned two trays of brioche. He fumbles every dish I pass him and stares up at the ceiling as I prod the conversation along, his already ruddy cheeks going even redder.
I do not particularly mind being the foremost conversationalist out of the pair of us. Even on his chattiest days, I usually am. Or he lets me be. As he finishes drying the cutlery, I am telling him about the time that has elapsed since the last letter I sent to the Royal Infirmary about my admission to their teaching hospital and the private physician who last week responded to my request to sit in on one of his dissections with a three-word missive—no, thank you.
Maybe I need a different approach,
I say, pinching the top off an iced bun and bringing it up to my lips, though I know full well it’s too large for a single bite.
Callum looks up from the knife he’s wiping and cries, Wait, don’t eat that!
with such vehemence that I startle, and he startles, and the knife pops through the towel and straight through the tip of his finger. There’s a small plop as the severed tip lands in the dishwater.
The blood starts at once, dripping from his hand and into the soapy water, where it blossoms through the suds like poppies bursting from their buds. All the color leaves his face as he stares down at his hand, then says, Oh dear.
It is, I must confess, the most excited I have ever been in Callum’s presence. I can’t remember the last time I was so excited. Here I am with an actual medical emergency and no male physicians to push me out of the way to handle it. With a chunk of his finger missing, Callum is the most interesting he has ever been to me.
I leaf through the mental compendium of medical knowledge I have compiled over years of study, and I land, as I almost always do, on Dr. Alexander Platt’s Treaties on Human Blood and Its Movement through the Body. In it, he writes that hands are complex instruments: each contains twenty-seven bones, four tendons, three main nerves, two arteries, two major muscle groups, and a complex network of veins that I am still trying to memorize, all wrapped up in tissue and skin and capped with fingernails. There are sensory components and motor functions—affecting everything from the ability to take a pinch of salt to bending at the elbow—that begin in the hand and run all the way into the arm, any of which can be mucked up by a misplaced knife.
Callum is staring wide-eyed at his finger, still as a rabbit dazed by the snap of a snare and making no attempt to staunch the blood. I snatch the towel from his hand and swaddle the tip of his finger in it, for the priority when dealing with a wound spouting excessive blood is to remind that blood that it will do far more good inside the body than out. It soaks through the cloth almost immediately, leaving my palms red and sticky.
My hands are steady, I notice with a blush of pride, even after the good jolt my heart was given when the actual severing occurred. I have read the books. I have studied anatomical drawings. I once cut open my own foot in a horribly misguided attempt to understand what the blue veins I can see through my skin look like up close. And though comparing books about medicine to the actual practice is like comparing a garden puddle to the ocean, I am as prepared for this as I could possibly be.
This is not how I envisioned attending to my first true medical patient in Edinburgh—in the backroom of the tiny bakeshop I’ve been toiling in to keep myself afloat between failed petition after failed petition to the university and a whole slew of private surgeons, begging for permission to study. But after the year I’ve had, I’ll take whatever opportunities to put my knowledge into practice that are presented. Gift horses and mouths and all that.
Here, sit down.
I guide Callum to the stool behind the counter, where I take coins from his customers, for I can make change faster than Mr. Brown, the second clerk. Hand over your head,
I say, for if nothing else, gravity will work in favor of keeping his blood inside his body. He obeys. I then fish the wayward fingertip from the washbasin, coming up with several chunks of slimy dough before I finally find it.
I return to Callum, who still has both hands over his head so that it looks as though he’s surrendering. He’s pale as flour, or perhaps that is actually flour dusting his cheeks. He’s not a clean sort. Is it bad?
he croaks.
Well, it’s not good, but it certainly could have been worse. Here, let me have a look.
He starts to unwrap the towel, and I qualify, No, lower your arms. I can’t look at it all the way up there.
The bleeding has not stopped, but it has slowed enough that I can remove the towel long enough for a look. The finger is less severed than I expected. While he sliced off a good piece of his fingerprint and a wicked crescent of the nail, the bone is untouched. If one must lose a part of one’s finger, this is the best that can be hoped for.
I pull the skin on either side of the wound up over it. I have a sewing kit in my bag, as I have three times lost the button from my cloak this winter and grew tired of walking around with the ghastly wind of the Nor Loch flapping its tails. All it takes is three stitches—in a style I learned not from A General System of Surgery but rather from a hideous pillow cover my mother pestered me into embroidering a daft-looking dog upon—to hold the flap in place. A few drops of blood still ooze up between the stitches, and I frown down at them. Had they truly been upon a pillowcase, I would have ripped them out and tried again.
But considering how little practice I’ve had with sealing an amputation—particularly one so small and delicate—and how much it slowed the bleeding, I allow myself a moment of pride before I move on to the second priority of Dr. Platt’s treaty on wounds of the flesh: holding infection at bay.
Stay here,
I say, as though he has any inclination to move. I’ll be right back.
In the kitchen, I bring water to a quick boil over the stove, still warm and easily stoked, then add wine and vinegar before soaking a towel in the mixture and returning to where Callum is still sitting wide-eyed behind the counter.
You’re not going to . . . do you have to . . . cut it off?
he asks.
No, you already did that,
I reply. We’re not amputating anything, just cleaning it up.
Oh.
He looks at the wine bottle in my fist and swallows hard. I thought you were trying to douse me.
I thought you might want it.
I offer him the bottle, but he doesn’t take it. I was saving that.
What for? Here, give me your hand.
I blot the stitching—which is much cleaner than I had previously thought; I am far too hard on myself—with the soaked towel. Callum coughs with his cheeks puffed out when the vinegar tang strikes the air. Then it’s a strip of cheesecloth around the finger, bound and tucked.
Stitched, bandaged, and sorted. I haven’t even broken a sweat.
A year of men telling me I am incapable of this work only gives my pride a more savage edge, and I feel, for the first time in so many long, cold, discouraging months, that I am as clever and capable and fit for the medical profession as any of the men who have denied me a place in it.
I wipe my hands off on my skirt and straighten, surveying the bakery. In addition to every other task that needs doing before we close up for the night, the dishes will need to be rewashed. There’s a long dribble of blood along the floor that will have to be scrubbed before it dries, another on my sleeve, and a splatter across Callum’s apron that should be soaked out before tomorrow. There is also a fingertip to be disposed of.
Beside me, Callum takes a long, deep breath and lets it hiss out between pursed lips as he examines his hand. Well, this rather spoils the night.
We were just washing up.
Well, I had something . . . else.
He pushes his chin against his chest. For you.
Can it wait?
I ask. I’m already calculating how long this will leave Callum useless over the ovens, whether Mr. Brown will be able to lend a hand, how much this will cut into my time off this week, which I had planned to use to begin a draft of a treaty in favor of educational equality.
No, it’s not . . . I mean, I suppose . . . it could, but . . .
He’s picking at the edges of the bandage but stops before I can reprimand him. He’s still pale, but a bit of the ruddiness is starting to return to the apples of his cheeks. It’s not something that will last.
Is it something for eating?
I ask.
Something of a . . . just . . . stay there.
He wobbles to his feet in spite of my protestations and disappears into the kitchen. I hadn’t noticed anything special when I was mixing the wine and vinegar, but I also hadn’t been particularly looking for it. I check my fingers for blood, then swipe a clean one over the iced bun I had previously targeted. Don’t strain yourself,
I call to him.
I’m not,
he replies, immediately followed by a crash like something tin knocked over. I’m fine. Don’t come back here!
He appears behind the counter again, more red-faced than before and one sleeve sopping with what must have been the milk he so raucously spilled. He’s also clutching a fine china plate before him in presentation, and upon it sits a single, perfect cream puff.
My stomach drops, the sight of that pastry sending a tremble through me that a waterfall of blood had not.
What are you eating?
he asks at the same moment I say What is that?
He sets the plate on the counter, then holds out his uninjured hand in presentation. It’s a cream puff.
I can see that.
It is, more specifically, because I know you love specificity—
I do, yes.
—exactly the cream puff I gave you the day we met.
His smile falters, and he qualifies, "Well, not exactly that one. As that was months ago. And since you ate that one, and several more—"
Why did you make me this?
I look down at the two choux halves with whorls of thick cream sculpted between them—he’s never this careful with his craftsmanship, his loaves and cakes the kind of rustic you’d expect to be made by a big-handed baker of good Scotch stock. But this is so deliberate and decorative and—zounds, I can’t believe I know exactly what type of pastry this is and how important it is to let the flour mixture cool before whisking in the egg. All this baking nonsense is taking up important space in my head that should be filled with notations on treating popliteal aneurisms and the different types of hernias outlined in Treaties on Ruptures, which I took great pains to memorize.
Maybe we should sit down,
he says. I’m a little . . . faint.
Likely because you lost blood.
Or . . . yes. That must be it.
This really can’t wait?
I ask as I lead him over to one of the tables crowded in the front of the shop. He carries the cream puff, and it wobbles on the plate as his hand shakes. You should go home and rest. At least close the shop tomorrow. Or Mr. Brown can supervise the apprentices and we can keep everything simple. They can’t muck up a bread roll too badly.
He makes to pull the chair out for me, but I wave him away. If you are insistent upon moving forward with whatever this is, at least sit down before you fall over.
We take opposite sides, pressed up against the cold, damp window. Down the road, the clock from Saint Giles’ is striking the hour. The buildings along the Cowgate are gray with the twilight, and the sky is gray, and everyone passing the bakery is wrapped in gray wool, and I swear I haven’t seen color since I came to this godforsaken place.
Callum sets the cream puff on the table between us, then stares at me, fiddling with his sleeve. Oh, the wine.
He casts a glance over at the counter, seems to decide it’s not worth going back for, then looks again to me, his hands resting on the tabletop. His knuckles are cracked from the dry winter air, fingernails short and chewed raw around the edges.
Do you remember the first day we met?
he blurts.
I look down at the cream puff, dread beginning to spread in my stomach like a drop of ink in water. I remember quite a lot of days.
But that one in particular?
Yes, of course.
It was a humiliating day—it still stings to think of it. Having written three letters to the university on the subject of my admission and received not a word in reply for over two months, I went to the office myself to investigate whether they had arrived. As soon as I gave my name to the secretary, he informed me that my correspondence had indeed been received, but no, it had not been passed on to the board of governors. My petition had been denied without ever being heard, because I was a woman, and women were not permitted to enroll in the hospital teaching courses. I was then escorted from the building by a soldier on patrol, which just seemed excessive, though it would be a lie to say I did not consider sprinting past the secretary and bursting through the door into the governors’ hall without permission. I wear practical shoes and can run very fast.
But, having been unceremoniously deposited on the street, I had consoled myself at the bakeshop across the road, drowning my sorrows in a cream puff made for me by a round-faced baker with the figure of a man to whom cakes are too available. When I had tried to pay him for it, he’d given me my coins back. And as I was finishing it, at this very table beside this very window (oh, Callum was truly digging in the talons of sentimentality by sitting us here), he made a tentative approach with a mug of warm cider and, after a good chat, an offer of employment.
He had looked then like he was trying to lure a snappish dog in from the cold to lie beside his fire. Like he knew what was best for me, if only my stubborn heart could be enticed there. He looks the same way now, earnestly presenting me that same sort of cream puff, his chin tipped down so that he’s looking up at me through the hedgerow of his eyebrows. Felicity,
he says, my name wobbling in his throat. We’ve known each other for a while now.
We have,
I say, and the dread thickens.
And I’ve become quite fond of you. As you know.
I do.
And I did. After months of counting coins with my side pressed against his in the cramped space behind the counter and our hands overlapping when he passed me trays of warm rolls, it had become apparent that Callum was fond of me in a way I couldn’t make myself be fond of him. And though I had known of the existence of this fondness for a time, it had not been a matter of any urgency that required addressing.
But now he’s giving me a cream puff and recollecting. Telling me how fond he is of me.
I jump when he takes my hand across the table—an impulsive, lunging gesture. He pulls away just as fast, and I feel terrible for startling, so I hold my hand out in invitation and let him try again. His palms are sweating and my grip so unenthusiastic I imagine it must be akin to cuddling a filleted fish.
Felicity,
he says, and then again, I’m very fond of you.
Yes,
I say.
Very fond.
Yes.
I try to focus on what he’s saying and not of how to get my hand out of his without hurting his feelings and also if there’s any possible scenario in which I can walk away from this with that cream puff but without having to do any more than hold his hand.
Felicity,
he says again, and when I look up, he’s leaning across the table toward me with his eyes closed and his lips jutting out.
And here it is. The inevitable kiss.
When Callum and I first met, I had been lonely enough to not only accept his employment, but also the companionship that came with it, which gave him the idea that men often get in their heads when a woman pays some kind of attention to them: that it was a sign I want him to smash his mouth—and possibly other body parts—against mine. Which I do not.
But I close my eyes and let him kiss me.
There is more of a lunge into the initial approach than I would prefer, and our teeth knock in a way that makes me wonder if there’s a business in selling Dr. John Hunter’s newly advertised live tooth transplants to women who have been kissed by overly enthusiastic men. It’s nowhere near as unenjoyable as my only previous experience with the act, though just as wet and just as dispassionate a gesture, the oral equivalent of a handshake.
Best to get it over with, I think, so I stay still and let him press his lips to mine, feeling as though I’m being stamped like a ledger. Which is apparently the wrong thing to do, because he stops very abruptly and falls back into his chair, wiping his mouth on his sleeve. I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have done that.
No, it’s all right,
I say quickly. And it was. It hadn’t been hostile or forced upon me. Had I turned away, I know he wouldn’t have chased me. Because Callum is a good man. He walks on the outside of the pavement so he takes the splash of the carriage wheels through the snow instead of me. He listens to every story I tell, even when I know I’ve been taking up more than my share of the conversation. He stopped adding almonds to the sweet breads when I told him almonds make my throat itch.
Felicity,
Callum says, I’d like to marry you.
Then he drops off his chair and lands with a hard thunk against the floor that makes me concerned for his kneecaps. Sorry, I got the order wrong.
I almost drop too—though not in chivalry. I’m feeling far fainter in the face of matrimony than I did at the sight of half a finger in the dishwater. What?
Did you . . .
He swallows so hard I see his throat travel the entire course of his neck. Did you not know I was going to ask you?
In truth, I had expected nothing more than a kiss but suddenly feel foolish for thinking that was all he wanted from me. I fumble around for an explanation for my willful ignorance and only come up with We hardly know each other!
We’ve known each other almost a year,
he replies.
A year is nothing!
I protest. I’ve had dresses I wore for a year and then woke up one morning and thought, ‘Why am I wearing this insane dress that makes me look like a terrier mated with a lobster?’
You never look like a lobster,
he says.
I do when I wear red,
I say. And when I blush. And my hair is too red. And I wouldn’t have time to plan a wedding right now because I’m busy. And tired. And I have so much to read. And I’m going to London!
You are?
he asks.
You are? I ask myself at the same time I hear myself saying, Yes. I’m leaving tomorrow.
Tomorrow?
Yes, tomorrow.
Another revelation to myself—I have no plans to go to London. It sprang from me, a spontaneous and fictitious excuse crafted entirely from panic. But he’s still on his knee, so I push on with it. I have to see my brother there; he has . . .
I pause too long for my next word to be anything but a lie, then say, Syphilis.
It’s the first thing that comes to mind when I think of Monty.
Oh. Oh dear.
Callum, to his credit, seems to be making a true effort to understand my nonsensical ramblings.
Well, no, not syphilis,
I say. But he’s having terrible spells of . . . boredom . . . and asked me to come and . . . read to him. And I’m going to be petitioning the hospital for admission again in the spring when they bring in new attending physicians, and that will take all my attention.
Well, if we married, you wouldn’t have to worry about that.
Worry about what?
I ask. Planning a wedding?
No.
He picks himself up off his bended knee and sinks back into his chair with far more slump to his shoulders than before. About schooling.
I want to worry about that,
I reply, the back of my neck prickling. I’m going to get a license and become a physician.
But that will . . .
He stops, teeth pressing so hard into his bottom lip it mottles white.
I fold my arms. That will what?
You’re not serious about that, are you?
If I wasn’t serious, I wouldn’t have been able to sew you up just now.
I know—
You’d still be bleeding out over your washbasin.
I know that, and that was . . . You did a wonderful job.
He reaches out, like he might pat my hand, but I pull it off the table, for I am not a dog and therefore need no patting. But we all have silly things that we . . . we want . . . dreams, you know . . . and then one day you . . .
He scoops at the air with a hand, like he’s trying to conjure appropriate phraseology between us rather than be forced to say what he means. For example, when I was a boy, I wanted to train tigers for the Tower menagerie in London.
So train tigers,
I reply flatly.
He laughs, a small, nervous trill. Well, I don’t want to anymore, because I have the shop, and I have a house here. What I meant is, we all have silly things we lose interest in because we want something real, like a house and a shop and a spouse and children. Not—not today,
he stammers, for I must look petrified, but someday.
A different sort of dread begins to distill inside me now, strong and bitter as whiskey. Silly little things. That’s all he thought my grand ambitions ever were. All this time, all these chats over scones, all his intense listening to me explain how, if the head were to be sawed off a corpse, one could trace paths of the twelve nerves connecting to the brain all the way through the body. One of the few who had not told me to give up, even when I had nearly told myself to, when I had written to surgeon after surgeon in the city, begging for teaching and received only rejections. I hadn’t even been granted a single a meeting once they discovered I was a woman. All the while we had been together he’d been wondering when it was that I’d give up on this passing fancy, like it was a fashion trend that would disappear from shop windows by the end of the summer.
I’m not training tigers,
I say. It’s medicine. I want to be a doctor.
I know.
"They’re not even comparable! There are doctors all over this city. No one would say it was silly or impossible if I was a man. You couldn’t train tigers because you’re just a baker from Scotland, but I have actual skills. His face falls before I register what I’ve said, and I try to back step.
Not that you . . . sorry, I didn’t mean that."
I know,
he says. But someday, you’ll want something real. And I’d like to be that something for you.
He looks very intently at me, and I think he wants me to say something to assure him I take his meaning, and yes, he’s right, I’m just a flighty thing with a passing interest in medicine that can be siphoned off once a ring is placed upon my finger. But all I can think to say is a snappish And maybe someday the stars will fall from the sky. So I offer nothing in return but a frosty stare, the sort of look my brother once told me could put out a cigar.
Callum tucks his chin into his chest, then blows out a long, hard breath that ruffles his fringey hair. And if you don’t want that too, then I don’t want to do this anymore.
Do what?
I don’t want you working here whenever you need money and showing up at any hour you please and eating all the buns and taking advantage of me because you know I’ve an affection for you. I either want to marry you, or I don’t want to see you anymore.
I can’t argue with any of that, though the fact that my heart sinks far further at the thought of losing this job than of losing Callum speaks volumes about the ill-advised nature of a union between us. I’m sure I could find something else to sustain me in this bleak, punishing city, but it would likely be even more menial and tedious than counting coins in a bakery and would most certainly not include free desserts. I’d ruin my eyes making buttons in a smoggy factory or wear myself ragged as a domestic, be blind and bent and consumptive by twenty-five, and medical school would be soundly put to bed before I’d had a proper shot.
We stare at each other—I’m not sure if he wants me to apologize, or agree, or admit that yes, that’s what I’ve been doing, and yes, I’ve known I was using him badly, and yes, I will agree to his proposal in penance and it will all have been worth it. But I stay quiet.
We should finish cleaning up,
he says at last, standing up and wiping his hands off on his apron with a wince. You can eat the cream puff. Even if you can’t say yes right now.
I wish I could believe that yes was inevitable, the same way he seems to. It would be so much easier to want to say yes, to want a house on the Cowgate and a whole brood of round Doyle children with stubby Montague legs and a solid life with this kind, solid man. A small part of me—the part that traces my finger in the sifted sugar dusted around the edges of the choux and almost calls him back—knows that there are far worse things for a woman to be than a kind man’s wife. It would be so much easier than being a single-minded woman with a chalk drawing on the floor of her boardinghouse bedroom mapping out every vein and nerve and artery and organ she reads about, adding notations about the size and properties of each. It would be so much easier if I did not want to know everything so badly. If I did not want so badly to be reliant upon no soul but myself.
When Monty, Percy, and I returned to England after what can be generously called a Tour, the idea of a life in Edinburgh as an independent woman was thrilling. The university had a newly minted medical school; the Royal Infirmary allowed student observation; an anatomy theater was being built in College Garden. It was the city where Alexander Platt had arrived after his dishonorable navy discharge with no references and no prospects and had made a name for himself simply by refusing to stop talking about the radical notions that had gotten him booted from the service. Edinburgh had given Alexander Platt a leg up from nothing because it had seen in him a brilliant mind, no matter that it came from a working-class lad with no experience and a stripped title. I was certain that it would do the same for me.
Instead I was here, in a bakeshop with a proposal pastry.
Callum is kind, I tell myself as I stare at the cream puff. Callum is sweet. Callum loves bread and wakes early and cleans up after himself. He doesn’t mind that I don’t wear cosmetics and make very little attempt to dress my hair. He listens to me, and he doesn’t make me feel unsafe.
I could do much worse than a kind man.
The scent of sugar and wood smoke starts to return to the room as Callum smothers the ovens, drowning out the faint hint of blood that still lingers, sharp and metallic as a new sewing needle. I