The Silence: A Psychological Thriller
By Luca Veste
()
About this ebook
From the author of The Bone Keeper comes The Silence, another sinister psychological thriller of secrets, revenge, and a lurking serial killer.
We killed a stranger and covered it up.
It was supposed to be our last weekend away as friends, before marriage and respectability beckoned. But what happened that Saturday changed everything.
The six of us promised we would never tell anyone about the body we buried, even when we realized our victim was a serial killer.
But now the silence has been broken. And the killing has started again…
A twisted thriller that asks if we ever truly know our friends, and just how high price is for our silence.
Luca Veste
Luca Veste was the editor of the Spinetingler Award-nominated charity anthology Off The Record and co-editor of True Brit Grit. He lives in Liverpool with his wife and two young daughters.
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The Silence - Luca Veste
Also by Luca Veste
The Bone Keeper
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Books. Change. Lives.
Copyright © 2020 by Luca Veste
Cover and internal design © 2020 by Sourcebooks
Cover design by Ervin Serrano
Cover image © Reilika Landen/Arcangel, VolodymyrSanych/Shutterstock
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The characters and events portrayed in this book are fictitious or are used fictitiously. Any similarity to real persons, living or dead, is purely coincidental and not intended by the author.
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Contents
Front Cover
Title Page
Copyright
One
Two
Three
Four
Five
Six
Seven
Eight
Nine
Ten
Eleven
1992
Twelve
Thirteen
Fourteen
Fifteen
1994
Sixteen
Seventeen
1996
Eighteen
Nineteen
Twenty
Twenty-One
1997
Twenty-Two
Twenty-Three
Twenty-Four
1999
Twenty-Five
Twenty-Six
Twenty-Seven
Twenty-Eight
Twenty-Nine
2002
Thirty
Thirty-One
Thirty-Two
Thirty-Three
Thirty-Four
Thirty-Five
Thirty-Six
Thirty-Seven
Thirty-Eight
Thirty-Nine
Forty
Forty-One
1993
Forty-Two
Forty-Three
Forty-Four
Later
Now
Reading Group Guide
A Conversation with the Author
Acknowledgments
About the Author
Back Cover
For Steve Cavanagh—my PodBro, my shaky idea fixer, my guide, my confidante, but above all else, my friend.
When it was over, there was silence.
It wasn’t a calm type of quiet. Peaceful or tranquil. It was a suffocating stillness as reality settled over us all.
On me.
No turning back now. No changing our minds. No fixing our mistake.
I can still feel the mud under my fingernails. The blood that didn’t belong to me on my skin. The smell of sweat and fear.
I could scrub myself clean over and over, and it would never be enough.
It would still be there. Ground down, seeping into my skin. Turning my blood black and cold.
The dirt.
The pain.
The evil.
This was my mistake. My fault.
In the beginning, there was a boy. A small, anonymous young boy, who you wouldn’t look at twice. Quiet and thoughtful.
He would become a killer, but that happened later. For now, while he was a child, there was only the song.
Oranges and lemons
Say the bells of Saint Clements.
You owe me five farthings,
Say the bells of Saint Martin’s.
When will you pay me?
Say the bells at Old Bailey.
When I grow rich
Say the bells at Shoreditch.
When will that be?
Say the bells of Stepney.
I do not know
Says the great bell at Bow.
Here comes a candle to light you to bed,
And here comes a chopper to chop off your head!
Chip chop chip chop the last man is dead.
The children would sing that song and play their game—never including him.
That’s how it began.
That’s where he learned how to use it. The words meaning so much. Giving him something he never had.
He started with dolls. Removing their heads, lighting his candles.
Then, later, they didn’t provide what he had needed.
It had to be something more real.
Chip chop. Red candles, lighting them to death. Endless sleep.
It gave him power. Revenge.
Relief.
Finally.
One
Our phones had pinged at the same time. A smile on our faces as we read the latest message in the group chat, turned to each other, and both agreed without saying a word. That’s how we live our lives now. A series of moments, interspersed with cell phones vibrating or dinging away to let us know what is happening around the world. We’re instantly contactable. When the world ends, we’ll find out from a breaking news notification, I imagine.
There’s a point when you know age has finally caught up with you. That you’re not young anymore and time is marching on. Life is happening, and you have to make a decision to catch up with it or try to stop it somehow. That you are no longer in your teens or your twenties, that forty isn’t that far away and you have to start growing up.
For me, it was when I bought my own house and went to a nineties-themed music festival.
The two were unrelated but happened in the same week.
The blurred line between nostalgia and my unfolding future. An invisible line, drawing the former to a close and starting the latter.
The music festival had come up as a link in that group chat. Chris had sent it; Michelle had replied with some emojis; Stuart took a day to respond with a thumbs-up and a list of bands he hoped would be there. Alexandra and I were already discussing whether it was too close to our move-in date, deciding within a few minutes it would be fine.
We had saved and saved, scrimping together every last penny for the deposit. The monthly payments were more than manageable, less than we had been paying in rent, strangely enough.
Now, it was ours. The very first place we could properly call home.
This belonged to us. It was only bricks and mortar, but when Alexandra and I had picked up the keys and let ourselves inside for the first time, there was a definite feeling of arrival. Into adulthood, home ownership, being.
It’s bizarre the way inanimate objects can suddenly become the catalyst for relief.
The boxes were inside the house but remained firmly unpacked. All clearly marked and not by my hand. I’d come back to the rented flat we shared one day to find a load of boxes with different rooms noted on them.
That had always been Alexandra. I had no issues with organization, but when she was excited about something, I didn’t stand a chance. I took a breath, and she’d already done it.
Matt, have you seen the roll mat?
I wondered for a second or two what the hell a roll mat was, then remembered just in time. I didn’t want another lesson in camping if I could help it. I looked around the room, wondering how we’d manage to find anything and then spotted it wedged between two boxes marked LIVING ROOM. I shouted up a confirmation to Alexandra and continued making a playlist for the car.
Each song was a reminder of another time.
Rhythm Is a Dancer,
Snap! That one was from 1992—year six in primary school. First dance I remember in school. I danced for the first time in front of people. I’d tried to avoid doing the same thing ever since. Same year as End of the Road
by Boyz II Men and Stay
by Shakespears Sister. Also I Will Always Love You,
but I’d rather forget that song and the film Alexandra watched on a yearly basis for some unknown reason.
1993. First and second year in high school. The year of Wet Wet Wet and that song that seemed to be Number 1 for the entire year. I wasn’t a fan but stuck it on the playlist anyway. Also added Mariah Carey’s version of Without You,
Pato Banton, D:Ream, and East 17.
1997. Year ten and eleven in high school. Puff Daddy missing Notorious B.I.G. Will Smith with Men in Black.
No Doubt, Natalie Imbruglia, and the Verve all got added. I stuck Hanson in for the laughs it would surely generate.
And the mass sing-along.
1998 and 1999. GCSE’s and the start of A-Levels. The year the pickings in music became slimmer. Steps and S Club 7 had arrived. Tragedy
had to go on there. As did Shania Twain. Then, it was the greatest pop song of all time—in my humble opinion—…Baby One More Time
and the ridiculously young Britney Spears.
I smiled to myself, each song coming to mind instantly and vividly. The soundtrack of my youth. I threw some Cast and Space tracks on the list because they were ace and local to us. And they would annoy our mate from Manchester, Stuart, too.
The weekend was going to be filled with reminiscing and sore throats from singing songs we somehow still knew by heart.
We’ve just bought a house, and now we’re swapping that for a tent in a field,
I said as Alexandra walked into the room. I stopped updating the playlist, looking up at her from the sofa that wouldn’t stay in the position we’d dropped it in the day before. I don’t understand how this happened. We’ve got a proper bed here. And walls.
Stop moaning,
she replied, shaking her head and smiling to herself. Where’s your sense of adventure? We’re not too old to be going camping, you know.
I’m just saying, surely we’ve gotten to the point where we can afford to have proper walls now. Walls, Alexandra. They’re this new invention that stops us from freezing to death at night.
Sarcasm is your least attractive trait. And where’s the fun in that? This whole weekend is about recapturing our youth, right? Well, that means we’re going to be in a field with thousands of other people.
I took a breath, ready to argue my point further, but could see it was pointless. Truth was, I was just as excited about it. Still, it was October, and my feet never felt warm at the best of times.
Did you put that thing under the car?
I frowned, then remembered what she was talking about from the roll of her eyes. I’m not sure it’s a good idea. I don’t like the thought of leaving a spare key fixed to the car. Seems to be asking for trouble, isn’t it?
It’s totally safe. And anyway, it’s just a precaution. If you lose the car keys in some field near Bath, you’ll be complaining for weeks after about the cost.
Okay, okay, I’ll do it when we get there.
The little black box was on my desk. A combination lock and a spare car key inside. You could affix it in the wheel arch, and it was unbreakable apparently. I wasn’t so sure. I used our anniversary as a memorable date to unlock it. Our newest anniversary date.
Are you ready to go?
Alexandra asked, adding yet another thing to backpack three—the other two were already in the trunk. We’ve got to meet the others in fifteen minutes.
Yeah, just finishing off now. Just trying to remember that song Michelle used to sing in science in year ten.
‘Saturday Night’ by Whigfield.
That’s the one,
I said, typing it into the search bar. Over two hundred songs on the playlist now. Mostly nineties-era music, with a few eighties power ballads thrown in for good measure.
Well, hurry up,
I said, then smiled when Alexandra came over to me and wrapped her arms around my shoulders as I sat in my desk chair. I leaned back and rested my head against her body. You know how they get if we’re late.
I know. I’m just thinking though…we haven’t christened this room yet.
I was grinning as I stood up, and like giggling teenagers, we closed the curtains.
We were late.
An hour or so later, we were making our way down the M6, singing along to Aerosmith at the top of our lungs. Michelle and Stuart in the back seat, Chris and Nicola in another car behind ours.
Michelle had always been the singer in the group. Now, she was blaring tunes from the back seat as if it were karaoke time at Coopers pub in town. Loud and almost never in tune. She’d cut her hair into a bob a week or so earlier, and it bounced around her face as she moved. I kept glancing in the rearview mirror and smiling through my own monotone delivery.
It had been Chris’s idea to do this. Almost as if he knew that it was something we all needed—a way of drawing a line under our youth and accepting the fact that we were all now in our midthirties and it was time to move on with the next stage of our lives. Stuart and Michelle hadn’t needed much convincing. For them, it was simply an opportunity to reunite and continue the longest on-again, off-again relationship since Ross and Rachel.
It was a music festival with a difference—every band booked had been either genuinely half-famous twenty years earlier or were tribute acts for the bigger names. No Way Sis for Oasis. Blurred for Blur. Slice Girls for… Well, I got the point quick enough.
As a group of friends, I suppose we all had a little arrested development. In our thirties and only just buying our own house. None of us were parents yet. We’d traveled the world instead, lived in rented accommodations, had jobs instead of careers.
We were the people tabloids liked to castigate with the term millennials.
None of us enjoyed avocado on toast, so we had that going for us at least.
Alexandra placed a hand on my thigh as I tapped the wheel in time to the music blaring from the car speakers. The GPS on my phone told me we still had a few hours traveling ahead of us. I looked across at her and grinned. She responded by placing her other hand over her heart and matching Celine Dion’s voice echoing around the car.
If I’d believed in perfect moments—another nineties song—that would have been one. I wanted to capture it in a bubble and live in it forever.
Even as clouds drifted across the sky and darkened the day enough for me to prop my sunglasses on my head. Even when spots of rain splashed against the windshield. Even when Michelle and Stuart began bickering in the back seat…I kept smiling.
As if nothing bad could ever happen to us.
Two
Stuart and his thinning blond mop of hair calmed down a little, unable to match Michelle’s stamina beside him in the back of the car. I looked up in the rearview mirror and saw the approach of middle age written in the lines creasing his face. Around the eyes, mostly. His skin was still the color of bronze sand, the stubble perfectly sculptured on his face not graying as yet. I tried to imagine him as someone in their forties or fifties and failed. Simply accepting he was the same age as me was difficult enough, given he still looked like he was in his twenties.
The journey continued, carried along on a wind of nostalgia. Here Comes the Hotstepper
and It’s Oh So Quiet
particularly loud highlights. Every hour or so, we’d stop at a gas station, and people would swap cars. Managed to turn a three- or four-hour journey into one closer to six and a half hours.
Not one of us stopped smiling the whole time.
On one of the stops, I stood with Chris, sipping on coffees in the October sunshine. Alexandra was passing a can of Carlsberg over to Nicola from a cooler bag. They’d be wasted by the time we arrived, I guessed. It wouldn’t take long for Chris and me to catch up to them.
On the wall outside the entrance, there was a missing person’s poster. A young man, late teens. The picture looked like a mug shot, and I wondered if he really was missing or had simply forgotten to tell his family he had been sent to prison for something. Someone had scrawled the words Candle Man’s got him! across the picture.
Candle Man?
I said, raising an eyebrow in Chris’s direction.
He glanced at the poster and rolled his eyes. You’ve not heard that story?
Chris replied, shaking his head with a snort of derision. His hair flopped over as he moved, becoming less copious by the day. There would be a time when his previous nickname of the Liverpudlian Hugh Grant wouldn’t fit any longer. That’s that serial killer who is supposedly responsible for every missing person in the country. Someone went missing up our way a few months back, and the police actually had to come out and release a statement to try to stop the rumors spreading about it online. You work in computers; you should know about it.
I don’t know everything that happens on the internet because I work with computers, Chris.
I know, I know. I just thought you might have come across it.
I think I have,
I said, something rattling away in my subconscious. Was there a documentary or something?
Chris shrugged his shoulders and sipped on his coffee. Not sure. Michelle was telling us about it in the car. Apparently, a red candle appears or something, and there’s a dude who has killed all over the country for years and years. Probably something that makes families of people who go missing feel better. Michelle reckons it’s true and that the police are just trying to keep it quiet.
Sounds like rubbish to me.
To anyone with half a brain.
Good idea this, mate,
I said, patting Chris on the shoulder and changing the subject. Just spent twenty minutes singing Spice Girls songs.
Yeah, well, thankfully they won’t be at this thing.
You always had a soft spot for Baby Spice.
That makes more sense than your Sporty obsession.
I laughed and shook my head. It’s only because of the accent.
Reckon it’s time we grew up?
We already have,
I said, seeing Alexandra and Nicola walking back out and toward the car. We followed them across the parking lot, and I smirked at Chris. Tried to keep the excitement out of my voice. We’re gonna start trying for a baby. And, in preparation for that, I’m buying a ring.
Chris stopped dead in his tracks, and I had to shush him as he made a noise like an excited animal. Are you serious?
Will you keep your voice down?
I said, unable to keep the smile from my face. Yes, I am. It’s time. We’ve just bought the house, we’re doing well financially…and I bloody love the bones of her, mate. Why should we wait any longer? It’s not like we’re getting any younger. We’ve been talking about it for a while, but I don’t think we were sure until the house went through.
I can already see you with a kid,
Chris said, holding back laughter. Walking around with a baby sling and a membership for Chester Zoo.
Well, when you put it like that…
I’m happy for you,
Chris said, using the fingertips of his right hand to lift the flop of hair from his forehead. I just don’t envy you telling Stuart I’m going to be your best man.
Cocky, aren’t you?
I replied, laughing openly now. You’re so sure I’d pick you?
What are you two gossips talking about?
We looked up as Stuart joined us. Chris glanced at me with a ridiculous grin on his face and motioned with his head. I sighed and told him what I’d just told Chris.
Well?
I said when I’d finished, expecting the usual lecture about never settling down from Stuart. He had always been opposed to any notion of getting older and doing mature things. Tell me I’m wasting my life and I should have stayed single. Again.
Stuart hesitated, then smiled at me. I think it’s great. About bloody time if you ask me.
I held onto Chris as I pretended to almost faint. Are you serious? The great Stuart Johnson, thinking marriage and kids is a good idea? I don’t believe it.
He gave me a playful shove and told me to shut up. Listen, even I know we’re not as young as we once were. And besides…maybe I’ve been thinking about settling down myself. Finally.
We followed his gaze toward Michelle and both broke out into oohs and aahs. He laughed, and we went back to the cars still joking around.
An hour or so later, after driving down an inordinate number of country roads that could barely be called that, we finally arrived at the festival. It wasn’t until I was out of the car that I realized quite how in the middle of nowhere we appeared to be. We had driven past the odd farmhouse on the drive, but now it was a muddy field and acres of land all around us. We found a spot out of the way and pitched our tents as far away from anyone else as we could manage. Behind us, woodland stretched out for as far as we could see. Chris grinned at me the entire time we were setting up, and he suddenly looked ten years younger. I wondered if we all did. Michelle and Stuart were snogging like teenagers, being goaded by Alexandra and Nicola.
It was the way things had been, the way I hoped they always would be.
Why this?
I said to Chris, as we both took a break and opened a can of lager for each of us. I didn’t think you went in for all that nostalgia stuff?
Look at us,
Chris replied, swiping an arm to indicate the others. This is our last chance before you and Alexandra get married and start a family.
Now you say it out loud…
I said with a smirk, but Chris waved me off.
We both know you can’t wait to get started. You’ll get married, have kids. Stuart will either wake up and realize Michelle is the one or go traveling again if he wasn’t being serious. Me and Nicola will carry on as normal. Getting older and older each day. I saw this event and thought it was a perfect way of drawing a close on a chapter in our lives. Make sense?
I suppose,
I said, knocking back a large glug from the can and noisily sighing with satisfaction. Are you and Nicola going to be doing the same, then?
We’re already married,
Chris replied, chuckling to himself. You were there, remember?
I meant having kids. I’m surprised you haven’t before now.
Chris placed his hand on the back of his neck and seemed to rub some life into it. Well, there’s the whole not-being-able-to-conceive thing, Matt.
I’m not saying that,
I said quickly, annoyed that I’d put my foot in it. I remembered when he’d told me that they couldn’t have kids. I didn’t think he’d ever been as low as he was at that point. I meant, you could adopt or whatever. I think you’d make boss parents.
So do I,
Chris replied, then shrugged his shoulders. Who knows? Nic is pretty focused on what we do have right now. We talk about it, but I don’t know. I’ll tell you what though—over twenty years we’ve been together, and I would still do anything to make her happy. And she’d do the same for me.
Silence fell over us for a second before I shook it off. Mate, who knew getting old would turn us into sappy fools? Let’s get drunk and stupid, like the old days.
Chris laughed hard and clunked his can against mine. Agreed.
We were soon lost in the group and its madness.
Happy, laughing, shouting, telling stories. Remembering times when we were younger. The pacts we’d made, the drunken tales of woe, the shared experiences. They all fell out of us in a collective bout of togetherness.
We were young again for a final weekend.
It was the six of us. Had been for as long as I could remember. What had started as friendship had become more than that for almost all of us.
The darkness grew at night, and we laughed, we drank, we sang. We enjoyed ourselves as if it were the nineties again and we didn’t have a care in the world.
And at night, when the silence fell, we didn’t feel any different.
Three
I looked at Alexandra and smiled. Worth it?
Worth it,
she replied, stroking my arm and looking off toward the stage. The last band was playing, and even though they looked like dots from where we were standing, it was still some sight.
It was almost as if twenty years hadn’t passed for any of us. Earlier in the day, I’d looked around and it was like we were all eighteen again. Bouncing up and down, laughing and singing along to songs we didn’t really know the words to. Making our own up to cover the gaps.
We were wringing every last moment of joy from the experience. We may have been in our midthirties, but we could have been kids again.
Now, as the moon shone above us and the music came to an end, it felt like we could do this forever.
What a weekend,
Stuart said with the wide grin he always wore after drinking. His words weren’t slurred yet, but I didn’t think that would be far off. So glad I came.
Yeah, I bet you are,
I replied, catching Alexandra’s eyes as she linked her arm in mine. I nodded toward Michelle, who was staring with googly eyes toward Stuart. Alexandra giggled and covered her mouth. Let’s get back. It’s a bit of a walk from here.
We walked in pairs into the darkness, the occasional fluorescent light above trying to guide our way. We’d pitched our tents on the very outskirts of the fields, wanting to be as far from the younger attendees as possible.
That was probably the only thing that had marked us out as part of the older campers that weekend though. Most of the crowd the festival had been targeted at—like us, the thirty-odd-year-old contingent—had decided against camping. Those who seemed to just want to dance to music they vaguely remembered as toddlers had filled the campgrounds.
How many do you reckon we saw in the end?
Alexandra said, resting her head against my upper arm as we trudged through the field.
Bands? I don’t know. Over three days, maybe twenty, thirty?
Some of them looked proper old now. Still got the dance moves, but they’re all a bit slower these days.
We’re all getting old,
I said, drawing her arm closer to me with a squeeze. She responded with a playful punch to my arm.
Speak for yourself. I’ll still be going to festivals in my seventies, dancing long into the night.
I laughed softly, waiting for her to rest her head on me again. It was Sunday night. The end of a perfect weekend. Three days of drinking, singing, laughing, and talking.
It’s like being back at university,
I said, watching Chris and Nicola walking ahead of us. Stuart and Michelle were behind us, doing what they seemed to have spent most of the weekend doing—slobbering over each other like lovestruck teens. Carefree, young enough to not worry about the consequences of anything. Not having to get up at a ridiculous time in the morning for work…
Drinking too much, smoking too much…
Yeah, those things too,
I said, looking over my shoulder and smiling at Stuart and Michelle. They were clinging on to each other, pausing every few steps or so to kiss and grope each other. Do you think them two will actually make a go of it this time?
Alexandra looked over her shoulder and then back at me. It would be about time. It’s obvious they’re perfect for each other.
And it’s not like we haven’t told them enough times.
They had been an on-and-off-again relationship for as long as I could remember. They never seemed to split acrimoniously—we never really knew if they were together or not. There were no arguments or cross words. No picking of sides. They were simply a couple one day and not the next.
It seemed to work for them.
I suppose they’re not like them two,
Alexandra said, meaning the couple ahead of us. Chris and Nicola. They’re different, I guess. They found each other early enough to not allow any doubt to creep in.
I couldn’t disagree. I’d known Chris the longest of everyone, but even then, I couldn’t really imagine a time when he’d been alone. Nicola had been on the scene almost as soon as I’d met Chris. And they fell into a relationship just as quickly. What about us?
Alexandra stopped walking, reaching up to me and placing her arms around my neck. It just took us a little longer than them two. That was all. And hopefully Stuart and Michelle will realize it like we did.
I smiled down at her and then kissed her.
A perfect end to a perfect weekend,
Alexandra said, her smile shining in the moonlight.
Not going to get any disagreement from me.
It was past midnight by the time we all reached the tents we’d called home for the past few days. The nearest neighbors were a good distance away, but we could still hear soft music beating from that direction. Raised laughter every now and again. It wasn’t loud enough to bother us. On the other side of the tents was the woodland that encircled the entire area. A mass of fields, in the middle of a seemingly unending forest. We’d taken advantage of the cover the trees afforded us, meaning we didn’t have to go searching for Portaloos every few minutes. Late at night, it hadn’t been as much fun, but I’d used the flashlight on my phone and not gone far past the tree line on the couple of occasions I’d had to relieve myself after the sun had gone down.
The first night, Stuart had attempted to tell us a ghost story that involved the woods, one of those old urban myths we’d all heard before. He hadn’t got through much of it before our laughter at his awful storytelling ability became too overwhelming.
Still, bad stories aside, I hadn’t wanted to go much farther into the woodland than was necessary. It gave me the creeps even in the daytime. Too many trees, too many hiding places.
Chris was already digging into his stash of food as we joined them. He threw me a bag of chips I caught with both hands, almost too hard. I passed them to Alexandra and then grabbed another myself. Sat down in the fold-up chairs we’d brought along with us.
Nothing’s been nicked,
Chris said, his familiar refrain every time we’d arrived back at camp. Successful weekend in that respect.
I told you there was nothing to worry about.
Yeah, well, I wasn’t sure,
Chris replied, reaching the end of his chips packet and pouring the crumbs into his upturned mouth. You hear bad things about these types of places.
It’s not that long since we’ve been to a festival,
I replied, shaking my head. You’re making it sound like we’re in our fifties and reminiscing about Glastonbury or whatever.
I’ll be glad of my own bed,
Nicola said, sitting on the grass near Chris’s feet and resting her head against his knees. "That’s something that’s definitely changed since we were last on one of these. I can’t deal with the lack of memory