Beautiful Music: A Novel
4.5/5
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About this ebook
Set in early 1970s Detroit, a divided city still reeling from its violent race riot of 1967, Beautiful Music is the story of one young man’s transformation through music. Danny Yzemski is a husky, pop radio–loving loner balancing a dysfunctional homelife with the sudden harsh realities of freshman year at a high school marked by racial turbulence.
But after tragedy strikes the family, Danny’s mother becomes increasingly erratic and angry about the seismic cultural shifts unfolding in her city and the world. As she tries to hold it together with the help of Librium, highballs, and breakfast cereal, Danny finds his own reason to carry on: rock and roll. In particular, the drum and guitar-heavy songs of local legends like the MC5 and Iggy Pop. In the vein of Nick Hornby and Tobias Wolff, yet with a style very much Zadoorian’s own, Beautiful Music is a touching story about the power of music and its ability to save one’s soul.
“A sweet and endearing coming-of-age tale measured in album tracks.” —The Wall Street Journal
“For Danny, cracking the seal on a fresh piece of wax and dissecting cover art and liner notes are acts of nigh religious experience that unveil to him a community of fellow rockers across Detroit . . . It’s in these small moments—a lonely boy experiencing premature nostalgia—that Zadoorian shines.” —The Washington Post
“A disturbing yet humorous tale of beleaguered adolescence in 1970s Motor City.” —Steve Miller, author of Detroit Rock City
Michael Zadoorian
Michael Zadoorian is the author of the critically acclaimed novel Second Hand.
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Reviews for Beautiful Music
36 ratings13 reviews
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Beautiful Music was a wonderful look into growing up in 1970s Detroit. I especially loved the references to the music of the time. Danny is required to grow up fast and the author handles this coming of age skillfully. I thought the book was accurate and true to the time period. I loved this one much more than Leisure Seeker which I have also read. 4 stars.
- Rating: 3 out of 5 stars3/5If I could, I go with 3.5 Stars for this novel. I quite enjoyed the beginning of this book, but I found the middle to drag on a bit too much for my liking. There are many things that I liked about the writing, the music, and journey of Danny, so I would recommend the book, but it's not one I'd pick up again. I won this through a librarything giveaway, and these are my honest thoughts regarding this novel.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5In 1969, Danny Yzemski spends most of his free time in the former coal storage bin in the basement, building model cars. He is already into music, as is his father, although their tastes run very differently. Danny likes rock, while his father likes “beautiful music”- modern songs covered by an orchestra. To better hear his Muzak, he buys a stereo unit for the basement den. Through the years, he teaches Danny to drive in his huge car, and they haunt the record stores together. Then his father suddenly dies, and life changes for him. His mother is alcoholic and mentally ill, and her sudden widowhood seems to precipitate a psychotic break. She drinks, smokes, and watches TV. That’s it. Everything else is Danny’s problem. He gets a job, drives without a license, learns about hard rock and deep cuts, and actually gets a friend. It’s a coming of age tale, from ages 10 to 16, told in first person, sometimes in letters to his dead father. Music is what gets him through a really tough adolescence. It brings him out of his loner shell, and gives him something to sooth his emotions. It says things he thinks, but better. Surprisingly, there is no girlfriend; most coming of age books have a girl/boy who really, really understands the subject like no one else. Danny stands on his own, with some help from his friend. It’s very well written; it brought back a lot of memories of my teen years and the music from it and how it felt to have a song say exactly how you feel. Five stars, for making a Dickensian adolescence seem perfectly believable.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Danny minds his own business, hanging out in his parents' basement building model cars and listening to his dad's "easy listening" records. As he enters high school at Redford High School (near Detroit) everything changes. Danny must man up in ways never anticipated. His life is sometimes difficult and racial tensions are high (Danny is white; most of his classmates are black) but Danny discovers real joy and escape in music. This novel reads like a memoir with a first-person narrative and wonderful details of life in Detroit in the 1970s. Bravo!
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Beautiful Music by Michael Zadoorian is a coming of age story that highlights a very specific period in American history. This novel will appeal to many readers of all ages but will have a special place for those of us who were around Danny's age at that time. I was the class of '76 so I relate to a lot of what he is experiencing and how he experiences it.This is the time period when FM radio started growing, through album rock stations in particular for the purpose of this book. AM becomes synonymous with lower quality sound and, in the opinions of those listening to album rock, lower quality music as well. Danny grows from AM, listening to pop and the easy listening sounds of the day (think instrumental versions of songs that either are or were recently charting), into FM, here shown as a deeper desire to understand the music and the artists as well as not just being happy with hearing the songs designated as singles. I was one of those who adopted FM early but I also resisted leaving pop behind completely because that was where you could hear a wider assortment. While Danny leaves a lot of the pop behind, the novel does not downplay the importance of pop and even Danny realizes that he still likes and appreciates much of that music, even if his passion becomes the music from the album stations.This is also the period when integration was occurring all over the country. I experienced these years in a variety of places, from DC to LA to north Louisiana. That was major culture shock going from LA to Louisiana in 1975. I was used to living and going to school with people of all races, ethnicities, and religions so going to a rural school in their first year of integration (what they called consolidation) was really strange. That particular year resembled what Danny experienced in his school, except on a much smaller scale. So Danny is also experiencing all of this.The Vietnam War was still going on, though winding down, which did indeed make many high school boys feel like they might have no choice what to do with their lives, unless you had money. All of these societal shifts play into Danny's coming of age. Add in a dysfunctional family (mildly at first, progressively deteriorating after a tragic event) and the fact Danny was one of the people who seemed to attract bullies at school and you begin to see what kind of minefield his life was.Music was initially one of the areas that comforted him and as time went on music was omnipresent in his life, songs playing in his head as he lived his daily life, the radio or records playing whenever possible. Much like Michael Herr's Dispatches exists between breathing in and breathing out, Beautiful Music exists between fade in and fade out. Those moments just before and just after a track on an album plays.I don't think you need to be of that moment in history to enjoy this novel, most of the events are universal to the extent that they are similar to what many people experience during high school. If you happen to remember that time well then I think you will enjoy this as both a coming of age novel and a nostalgic trip back to the days of album rock and AM pop stations. When you might hear Slow Ride followed by Hollywood Swinging on the radio and not think anything about it. The songs mentioned and hinted at are wonderful, even some deep cuts (though listeners of album stations weren't always aware of what was a deep cut since we often had no idea what was released as a single).Reviewed from a copy made available by the publisher via LibraryThing Early Reviewers.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Beautiful Music is simply beautiful and Danny Yzemski is a character I will never forget. Danny "had me" when just a few pages in, he was in the Hindenburg and his dad was pushing buttons on the radio and Danny's thoughts were "The worst thing that can happen is that he just turns the radio off." The 70s were a unique time and Michael Zadoorian has provided a wonderful reminder for those who lived through it and a view into those times for those who came later. It's a unique and bittersweet book. Lovers of music, particularly 70's rock, will be or should be in heaven. Finally, the book's end gave me chills. Zadoorian knows how to finish a book about music and a youth whose life is governed and saved by it.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5I love this book so much! This is the second Michael Zadoorian book for me, I have also read the Leisure Seeker. I have connected with both books so much. I want to read everything else the he has written.This is the story of Danny Yizerski,living In Detroit in 1970. He has finished elementary school and he has to start high school because of the lack of middle school in the area. I identified with his wanting to be invisible trying zig-zag through the hallways. Like him, I was overweight and bullied. The author enlightened me as to why the snowballs lobbed at me hurt so much. How diabolical to leave them out overnight to freeze! Danny and I were both bad swimmers, unlike him, I was not forced to take swimming during freshman year. Danny seemed to have a comfortable home life with his parents until something tragic happened to his father. He had to deal with a depressed alcoholic mother who was also a chain smoker. He put model kits together like my brother did when I was growing up and my son when he was the same age.Danny found his connection with music and later after his father died, it became a major part of his life. It gave him respite from his home life and later provided a way to have friends. I take my hat off to you, Michael Zadoorian, your book spoke to me and helped me feel better about those uncomfortable years of being Danny's age.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5An incredibly readable, quick but still satisfying coming of age novel. Once you pick this one up you will not put it down until you have read it all in one sitting. Danny and his family are accessible characters. Their story may be set in a specific time and place (1970's Detroit) but the themes explored are universal. Danny resembles Holden Caulfield ever so slightly but Danny will manage to reinvent himself while facing anxiety. Danny is a heck of a lot funnier too when given the opportunity!There is a lot to love about this story and I only have one problem: it ended. I could have followed Danny all the way through high school into college (or broadcasting school!) and beyond.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5This was quite a nice read even though I don't usually gravitate to reading books for or about teens. It was both funny and sad. I would no sooner laugh out loud at a funny line from this story than suddenly be hit by something quite devastating. Our protagonist Danny had a very close relationship with his dad, who at one point decided Danny should learn to drive although Danny had no intention of doing so at first. That sounded much like my older son and even my daughter years ago. Danny had a tentative relationship with his mom who was quite a heavy drinker. It made me sad to think that this young man, who struggled with so many things while growing up, had to be his mom's main support system for much of this book. Music was the thing, though. It was what helped Danny cope. The music was of a specific time and a place -- that of 1970s Detroit. Some of the artists were familiar to me from that era, but many were not because Danny's love was heavy metal while I myself preferred light rock and folk music. "It's not just about the words. It's about how music takes us out of ourselves, how it relieves our pains, lets loose something in our hearts, makes us feel better in ways we never knew we could."Segregation was the thing, too. I'd like to think that is behind us, but in my heart I know it's not. It made me think of years ago and now our present days. "Everyone was so afraid black people were going to move into our neighborhood. That was the worst thing that could happen. Now black people are moving into our neighborhood, and it doesn't seem to be making a difference. Except for all the white people moving away.I liked the book's ending which was a letter from Danny to his dad. It made me feel sad, but hopeful. Danny seemed like a real person by the end of the book, by which time I was wishing him well.
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5I received an advance copy of this book through the Early Reviewers program. I thoroughly enjoyed this book and read it quickly over the course of three nights. Mr. Zadoorian did an excellent job of overlaying the racial tensions prevalent in Detroit in the early 70's with the music scene of that same period. His portrayal of two loner/"loser" high school audiophiles was dead on. Though I was in high school about ten years after the action of this book, the conversations, inner dialogues, motivations, etc. seemed very familiar. I particularly enjoyed Mr. Z's commentary of the popular (critical and otherwise) albums of the day. I found myself calling out to Alexa to play albums mentioned in the book and dusted off my old LPs to listen to on the turntable. There is still nothing as satisfying as old vinyl, despite the convenience of digital music. Overall a great, quick, enjoyable read. A little trip down memory lane is good for us all.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5I enjoyed the hell outa this book! It's the second Zadoorian book I've read, but BEAUTIFUL MUSIC is worlds - generations - apart from the THE LEISURE SEEKER, which was about much older people, coping with aging and failing health. This time Zadoorian gives us a coming of age story set in 1970s Detroit. I knew right away that music would be important in young Danny Yzemski's story, but I expected more Motown. Not much of that here, but plenty of the stranger stuff that was found mostly on the newly emerging FM stations of the era, which Danny only gradually discovers, as he makes the switch from AM Top 40 pop stations like Windsor's CKLW.Despite some very tragic family circumstances, Danny, an only child, comes across as a very sweet kid, which doesn't make life any easier for him as he navigates the perilous halls of Redford High School. A clinically depressed, alcoholic mother makes things even harder. But a couple sympathetic teachers, music and one good friend help make things better. I'll be honest. I was a Top 40 fan at that stage of my life, but I'm about 15 years older than the author, so FM radio wasn't there when I was a kid, or teenager. But I could still empathize with the angst and torture of the teenage years, because Zadoorian gets all that right. And I recognized all the brand names and now-defunct department stores and other trivial details that made Danny's story and downtown Detroit so real. And I know how very important having even just one good friend is when you're that age. And yes, I did recognize most, if not all, of those songs and musical artists mentioned, though I was in my twenties already when they emerged. And I married a downriver girl, so I was a CKLW fan too, though I hail from northwest Michigan, and grew up on the late night sounds of WLS and WCFL out of Chicago, and Ernie's Record Mart out of Nashville.Bottom line? This is simply a damn good book. Michael Zadoorian has created some sympathetic and believable characters in Danny, his mother, and his best friend, John, as well as several very unlikable sorts in the people who torment Danny. Very readable, very enjoyable stuff. I read it in just a few sittings. Mr Z can tell a story, and one that will appeal not just to folks who came of age in the 70s either. It's a story for all ages, for high schoolers on up to geezers like me. Well done, Michael. I will recommend BEAUTIFUL MUSIC to anyone who enjoys a well told tale. - Tim Bazzett, author of the memoir, REED CITY BOY
- Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5Early 1970's Detroit. A city experiencing a racial change in its landscape, and this is where Danny is growing up, amongst the music and a less than ideal home life. Close to his father, a father who loves music, Danny is excited when his dad brings home the family's first record player. Trips to buy albums with his dad, he experiences his first look at sound. Things will change quickly in his life, and so will his taste, though not his love for sound. Danny is our narrator, and in many ways he seems younger than his years. He is a different, quiet sort of boy, contemplative, and doesn't easily fit in. Some of his observations are sad, but some are downright hilarious. He is an endearing young man, and I wanted good things to happen for him. He has his music though, and this is his salvation. Leads him to his first friend, the first noable thing he does in school. The seventies were a great time in music, and it was easy for me to identify with boy to whom music was his safety zone and a way to escape.I too felt my teenage years were lived around various soundtracks. Can remember exactly where I was when I hear different songs from back in the day.Theie is both an ease and a energy to the way this author writes. He shows a great deal of empathy,not only with his characters but in the situations in which they find themselves. A racially changing city and it's challenges eventually directly affects Danny and his school. It was a wonderful, insightful story with some great music woven without.ARC from Akashic books.
- Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5Every once in awhile, a book comes along that makes you happy as you read it. This new novel by Michael Zadoorian was that book for me. It's a fantastical written coming of age story by the author of The Leisure Seeker but its also a book full of musical references and took my memory back to happy times in my youth when I listened to the same music. An added plus for me is that the book takes place in Detroit, where I grew up and there were numerous references to people and places that I have forgotten over the years. Even if you aren't from Detroit, this is still a fantastic book that needs to be added 'to your to be read' list.Beautiful Music is set in Detroit in the early 70s, several years after the Detroit riots as the city is trying to deal with racial unrest. Danny is just getting ready to start high school He is a loner, often picked on and hides in music to handle high school and his very dysfunctional family. After Danny's dad dies unexpectedly, his mom becomes hooked on alcohol and Valium and his family life is only held together because he takes care of his mom. When he is young, he starts out listening to pop music with lots of orchestra music with his dad. As he gets older, he discovers to rock and roll and the music is what he lives for. When he is buried in his music, he can forget the world around him. It also helps him make friends and grow into a normal high school student.This was a great look back at the day when radio and record albums were the only way to listen to music. DJs on the radio were superstars and everyone listened to what they had to say - they could make or break the popularity of an record album. This is a wonderful nostalgic coming of age story - with the help of lots of music and for readers of a certain age, it will bring back plenty of memories. I highly recommend this book to any age!Thanks to the publisher for a copy of this book to read and review. All opinions are my own.
Book preview
Beautiful Music - Michael Zadoorian
The Hits of ’69!
A busy signal. That’s all I hear, again and again. It’s the fifth time I’ve called. My index finger starts to get sore around the cuticle from all the dialing. I’m calling CKLW’s phone number. Luckily, it’s not long distance or I’d be in big trouble with my parents. Though it could be long distance since CKLW is a Canadian radio station and I’m in Detroit, but I don’t think it is. Either way, I don’t know where I got it in my head to call them, but now that the idea is there, I can’t get it out. My mother is in the other room and she hasn’t started wondering yet what I’ve been doing on the phone for so long. She has one of her shows on and it’s pretty loud. Lucky for me, but I still keep getting a busy signal. On the ninth try, cuticle red and aching, I finally get through. After three rings, a woman picks up and says, CKLW request line. Can you hold for a moment?
Of course I can. I’m thrilled. Over the line, I can hear the disc jockey, Ed Mitchell, announcing the song In the Year 2525
by Zager & Evans. The song starts. It sounds tinny and staticky through the phone line, nowhere near as good as on my Kor/Sonic transistor radio. After a couple minutes, I start to panic, thinking that the operator has forgotten all about me, but then someone answers. His voice is so low and clear and deep that it seems to exist on a different wavelength altogether. There is nothing tinny or staticky about it. I’m actually speaking to the disc jockey himself.
Okay! What do you want to hear?
he says, in a growl that sounds so very familiar to me.
I can’t speak, having suddenly stumbled into a world where adults care about what I want.
Hello?
Is he mad? I don’t want DJ Ed Mitchell to be mad. He’s going to hang up, so I push out the words as best I can: Uh, I want to hear ‘A Boy Named Sue’ by Johnny Cash,
I say.
Okay! Wasn’t sure if anyone was there. Now look, I’m going to record your request, then we’re gonna play it on the air later. Is that cool?
I nod.
So it’s cool?
Yes,
I say, realizing that nodding at the phone is not a good idea. Trying to make up for my mistake, I muster up my energy and yell, Yeah!
All right!
says DJ Ed. He’s an adult who likes it when I yell. "That’s good. Say it just like that. Just say, Hey, Ed Mitchell. Then tell me your name, your age, and say the song you want to hear. Lots of enthusiasm. Got it?"
I think so.
Okay? Are you ready? And . . . go!
I mess it up, of course. I forget to say, Hey, Ed Mitchell. And I forget to say my name too.
You gotta get it right this time, or I have to go,
he says, and I can tell that he means it. Get ready. One . . . two . . . three . . . go!
I take a deep breath and spit it out fast: Hey, Ed Mitchell, my name is Danny Yzemski, I’m ten years old, and I want to hear ‘A Boy Named Sue’ by Johnny Cash!
"All righht! he roars. He is happy with me. I have pleased DJ Ed Mitchell.
Thanks, Danny. Good job. You’ll be on the air in a little while."
Then the line goes dead.
I hang around outside with my Kor/Sonic for the next two hours waiting to hear myself on the radio. I hear the same songs, over and over again. Crystal Blue Persuasion
Choice of Colors,
Put a Little Love in Your Heart,
My Cherie Amour.
I sit there on the glider in the backyard of our bungalow in northwest Detroit. Two years after the riot, my mother is finally feeling that it’s okay for me to be outside again as long as I stay in the yard. She remembers, like I remember, the towers of black smoke rising into the sky down Grand River Avenue four miles away, the rumors of looting at Grandland Shopping Center just a mile from our house, the tanks rolling down Fenkell after the governor called in the National Guard, the news reports of snipers, and the hazy, frantic footage of people running out of and into burning buildings. She’d really rather I just stay in the house.
Mark and Jim, the closest I have to friends, come by to talk, but I’ve got the transistor pressed to my ear. I’m going to be on the radio,
I tell them.
Sure you are, Tub-ski,
says Mark, then the two of them go off to play curb ball.
Just as well, since I’m still not supposed to go too far off our property. Besides, it’s important that I hear my voice on the radio. After an hour and a half, I start to worry that the Ed Mitchell Show is going to end without him playing me or my song. Or that the battery in my radio is going to die. I do hear one other kid request a song. It’s a little colored kid who says, What’s happening, Ed Mitchell? I wanna hear ‘Girl You’re Too Young’ by Archie Bell & the Drells.
Only when he says the name of the group, he stretches it out so it sounds like the Durr-ells.
I worry that maybe since he got to request a song I won’t hear mine. Yet a half-hour later, after a commercial for Gene Merollis Chevrolet ("Gene Merollis, what a great, great guyyy," sung by a man who sounds like he’s got a cigar wedged in the side of his mouth), I hear my own voice squawk and boom over the airwaves. (My voice is lower than most kids my age because I’m husky.)
I’m so excited I can’t even speak. I sit there on the glider in my backyard, swinging frantically, not even listening to the song, just letting the sound of my voice on the radio replay in my head. About the time when I do actually listen, the song begins to end. Johnny Cash is just about to shoot his dad for naming him Sue.
. . . But you oughta thank me before I die,
For the gravel in your guts and the spit in your eye . . .
A few moments later, Johnny Cash is done singing and the music fades. I know that even though CKLW will play this song hundred of times in the next few weeks, this is the last time I’m ever going to hear it in exactly this way.
My 1/25–Scale Life
Most mornings this summer, I’m awakened by the sound of the radio coming from the kitchen. It’s tuned to WJR, the Great Voice of the Great Lakes. I lie in bed listening to The Look of Love
by Sérgio Mendes & Brasil ’66 or The Unicorn
by the Irish Rovers until my father comes to wake me up. He knocks on the doorjamb, then grabs my foot and gives it a shake.
Up and at ’em, Daniel.
Okay, Dad.
Even though I just got out of bed, J.P. McCarthy, the disc jockey on WJR, is easy to listen to. He’s like an uncle you didn’t know you had. He says dopey stuff like Good morning, world!
and Remember my name in Sheboygan!
but I like him anyway. I notice the way my mother reacts to him. At the tiled kitchen counter, preparing a cup of tea for me, I watch as she pauses to listen to something he’s saying. That moment, with her head cocked downward, half-smiling, I notice how pretty my mother is.
What’re you up to today?
my dad says. He asks me this every day.
I’m just going to work on a model car downstairs.
Why don’t you get out and play some ball with your friends? How about that TV2 Swim-mobile? Isn’t that around here today?
Oh no,
says my mother. Every kid in the inner city has swam in that thing. He’ll get worms and god knows what else.
My father sighs. Well, try to get some fresh air.
Like there’s any fresh air in this city,
says my mother.
I’m not all that crazy about fresh air,
I chime in.
This is where my father gives up. He doesn’t actually know that my mother barely lets me leave the house anyway. Not that I mind. It doesn’t matter to me that it’s summer. It’s too hot and bright outside, the days too long, and my mother just wants me to be safe.
I even have my own special room in our basement. It was a coal bin before my parents bought the house, but now it’s just a little narrow room where things end up, with an old red Formica drop-leaf kitchen table at one end where I build the model cars. I sit at that beat-up table, with the radio on and my X-acto knife and the squint of Testors model glue in the air. (I’ve heard that kids sniff it.) Under a dusty cone of light, I tinker together 1/25–scale replicas of pro stock racers like the Sox & Martin Boss ’Cuda or the nitro funny cars of Don The Snake
Prudhomme and Tom The Mongoose
McEwen. (Natural enemies in nature and on the quarter-mile!) While I work, the only sounds are CKLW and the trill of the dehumidifier, clicking on, drying and vibrating the stinging chemical air. I sing along to the 5th Dimension or the Cowsills. Sometimes I imitate the disc jockeys while I sit there. That’s a little ‘Keem-O-Sabe’ for you, by Electric Indian. Coming up on four o’clock. It’s about eighty-four degrees in the Motor City . . .
Occasionally, my mother hears me talking to myself down in the coal bin. She speaks to me from the laundry area. Danny, stop talking when there’s no one there to listen.
Sorry, Mom.
We don’t need any more kooks in the family.
My mother doesn’t want me to grow up to be a kook. Her whole family is full of kooks, according to her, which is why she doesn’t talk to any of them.
I can easily spend the whole day building the model cars and listening to the radio, never leaving except to go upstairs to the bathroom or to make myself a sandwich. If my mother is in a bad mood, I just gulp back my hunger and swallow my spit. The washtub is my emergency place to pee.
During this third summer indoors, Jim sometimes knocks at the back door and calls for me, breaking my name into two parts. I sit there in the coal bin, ignoring him until my mother goes to the door and tells him that I’m busy. She never asks why I don’t answer him. Jim lives seven houses down from me and is moving away soon, away from Detroit, away from the idea of another riot that comes even closer to our neighborhood. His family is moving to Livonia, near the mall. I’m mad at him for leaving, so I sit there, ignoring him, building the model cars, staying out of my mother’s way and trying not to be a kook.
The Sound of Everything
It’s also the summer that my father and I go to the drag races. ("This Sunday afternoon at Detroit Dragway! Gigantic Superfuel Funny Car Spectacular!" say the commercials, echoing from my radio.) We take the long drive downriver in my father’s Biscayne to Sibley at Dix, pay our two dollars, pull into the wide dirt lot, and park among the gray-primered muscle cars with bulged hoods and raised rear ends, the trucks with their empty trailers, and the family station wagons. We trek through a series of fences and fields to the bleachers, working our way toward the sounds of tires squealing and engines revving.
Are you ready?
my father says to me. This is something he asks me every time we go.
I nod. I’m ready.
Okay. Because it’s going to be loud.
We sit among crowds of lean, smoking men in white T-shirts, with blowsy, puff-haired women in pedal pushers, and grubby kids with Kool-Aid-stained mouths, all of us watching the homemade hot rods, air-scooped and cherry-bombed, that rattle in on trailers from Inkster and Allen Park and Fenton and even Brightmoor, near us. The cars pair up on the drag strip and take off, one heat every minute or two.
When are the funny cars?
I ask my father over the sound of a new red-orange Pontiac The Judge
GTO skittering off the line against a Bondo-patched Nova. The Nova wins.
Pretty soon, I think,
he says, taking the last puff from his Old Gold before dropping it to the dirt and stepping on it. In his beige sport shirt and neat mustard slacks, he looks different from the other men.
The funny cars are candy-colored, airbrushed, decaled fiberglass shells of cars, like what I would find in one of my model car kits, only full size, with giant supercharged engines, enormous black slicks in the back and much smaller mag-rimmed wheels in the front, all mounted on a spindly tubular chassis with a cage where the driver is strapped in. They have names like Motown Shake and Comet Cyclone. The crews roll the cars up to the starting line, where they start the engines—a thunder that ignites the air and causes my dad and I to turn to each other, our eyes wide with disbelief. He yells to me and though I can’t really hear him, I know what he’s saying.
Are you ready?
Grinning, I nod my head again. It’s gonna be loud!
The crew pours bleach on the track and drivers spin their slicks till smoke billows, heating them against the asphalt for traction. Roar and squeal, steam and stink, all at an awful wonderful volume that makes my heart clatter in my chest. Soon the air is harsh with bleach and nitro fuel and I can barely breathe from excitement and fumes. Ears buzz and eyes tear, until finally a tall traffic light—the Christmas tree—counts down to a green light, and the cars explode off the line, tires scorching asphalt.
It’s over so quickly you would miss it if you looked away for seven seconds, but no one looks away. For those seven seconds, my father and I can see, smell, taste, feel, and hear sound. Sometimes my father brings earplugs, but we never use them. We crave that sound. We love how it feels, how it hurts. The sound fills us up inside. It seeps through my skin, between the bones and muscle, into the narrow spaces surrounding my heart, in those empty spaces that I hear when I beat my chest like Tarzan, the spaces that make my voice deep.
My Father’s Beautiful Music
On the way home, our ears buzzing, our nostrils stinging, the pleasant stink of burned rubber and exhaust clinging to our clothes, my father lights an Old Gold and turns on the Beautiful Music station. It plays songs that I recognize from CKLW and WXYZ, but with no words and rerecorded by stringed orchestras. Kites Are Fun,
I’ll Follow the Sun,
The Windmills of Your Mind.
Like CKLW, the station he listens to broadcasts from Windsor in Ontario just across the Ambassador Bridge from Detroit. What’s strange about the station is that it goes off the air at sunset. When we are in the car together, coming home from the drags, and the Beautiful Music is on and the sun glows red behind us, the station will simply sign off for the evening, just like that. A song ends—say, Both Sides Now
—then the Canadian national anthem starts playing. The announcer says, CBE is now ending its broadcast day. We will resume programming at sunrise tomorrow.
The song faces out, then suddenly there’s static. Gone.
This disturbs me in some deep, awful way, a kind of fear that I want to explain to my dad, but just can’t. How can I tell him that hearing a radio station go off the air, hearing the music fade away like that, terrifies me somehow, drains me of all the good sounds and vibration from the drags? It’s crazy. Maybe it’s because music always makes me feel better. So the station going off the air, the static, the quiet—that’s the opposite of sounds and vibration and feeling better. It’s fear and emptiness.
Luckily, most of the time when the Canadian station goes off the air, my father right away punches one of the thick chrome buttons on the radio and switches over to WJR, where there’s a baseball game on or more music. Whatever it is, it’s a relief to me. The worst thing that can happen is that he just turns the radio off.
The Jams
I don’t care much for rock music when I first hear it. I find this out in a classroom that fall, when one of the tough kids in my class brings in a record for show-and-tell. Before class, I hear talk between the desks that the record Barry Stegner is going to play has swearing on it. His plan is to trick our teacher Miss Ferlin into playing it in front of the class.
I have certainly heard swearing before from my mother and father, yet I somehow fear that having curse words spoken aloud in the classroom will cause some sort of disturbance, possibly even a riot. (But then I’m always worried about something causing a riot.) If that happens, I naturally assume that Barry Stegner and the other bad kids will take over the classroom, hold our teacher Miss Ferlin hostage, then maybe burn down the school for good measure.
I feel like it’s up to me to do something since I’m the only boy in the class who has won a citizenship award. (Me up on stage with dozens of girls, bursting with pride, not knowing that it will make me a target for every mean kid in the school—the tauntings, hat-stealings, book upendings, and lunch-money muggings began shortly after that.) Yet I can’t bring myself to tell Miss Ferlin that she’s about to play an obscene recording. I don’t want to be a tattletale, and besides, if there is a riot, what will they do to me? I have to keep my mouth shut.
An older, sandy-haired kid from the AV room rolls in a tanklike gray record player on a cart and plugs it in. The turntable silently starts to rotate.
Miss Ferlin looks out over the class. She has milky-smooth skin and a That Girl brunette bouffant, offset strangely by a slightly oversize and stationary glass eye. (No one knows how it happened, but it’s impossible to not stare at it when you talk to her.) Everyone, Barry Stegner has something for show-and-tell today.
Barry, sloth-eyed and loping, gets up before the class. Then he says, I have a new record that I want to play.
He holds up the album and I can feel the tension in the classroom.
Miss Ferlin takes a look at it, at the collage of images on the front, at the liquidy red, white, and blue letters across the top. It looks very . . .
She searches for a word. Patriotic
is what she settles on, spotting an American flag on the cover.
Barry pulls the album out of the sleeve and holds it up. The label is black and red with a large E at the top. He leers at the class, making a big show of placing the record on the ashy felt of the turntable.
And what is this record called, Barry?
asks Miss Ferlin.
I sit at my desk paralyzed, feeling bad about how I am letting Miss Ferlin and her glass eye and the American educational system down by allowing this to happen. Yet I’m also fascinated, wanting desperately to see what’s going to happen next.
"It’s called Kick Out the Jams, Miss Ferlin."
Miss Ferlin seems not exactly sure what to make of the title, but she smiles pleasantly anyway. And who’s the recording artist?
The MC5,
says Barry, grinning hard.
All right then, class. Barry is going to play his record called—
She looks to him for confirmation. "Kick Out the Jams?"
Yeah,
he says, staring at her glass eye.
Barry places the needle on the record and with a lurid glance toward the class, he reaches over and turns up the volume all the way. The whole class somehow knows something big is coming. A sizzle of amplification fills the room. We hear the recorded whistles and hoots of an audience for a few seconds, then finally a man’s voice booms out of the speaker, talking like he’s being held prisoner in an echo chamber: Right now . . . right now . . . right now it’s time to . . .
There’s a long pause, then the jangle of a guitar before the man screams: KICK OUT THE JAMS, MOTHERFUCKERS!
After that, a series of grunts and ahhs, guitar screeches, and drum beats that sound like gunshots. There is energy crackling in the air from the record, which reminds me for a brief, gleeful moment of the drags. And I feel pretty good—
Which is when Miss Ferlin, one eye shocked wide open, the other bored and noncommittal, rushes over to the record player, where her foot hits the bottom of the tank cart, sending it rolling across the front of the classroom. The record keeps playing: ". . . and I guess that I could get crazy now, baby . . ."
The music is raucous and angry and thrilling and scary. Even over all the noise, I can hear the sigh of approval from the class. Finally, Miss Ferlin pulls the plug from the wall outlet and the music grinds to a distorted halt. She pulls the needle from the record, grabs the record from the turntable, and hands it to Barry Stegner, who is very obviously thrilled with what has happened. Less so when she grabs him by the arm and drags him out of the classroom.
You are going to the principal’s office right now.
I’m happy when it’s over, but there’s something about the music, maybe just the volume of it, that haunts me for the rest of the day. I think about it later, when I’m in the basement building the model cars. It crosses my mind that the music I hear on my stations is not at all like what I heard today in class. Just as quickly, the idea evaporates and I continue to sing along to Sugar, Sugar.
Stereophrenia ’70!
It’s 6:35 p.m. on a Wednesday and my father is still not home. It’s not really all that unusual for him to work late. Sometimes his job requires it. He’s the head keyliner for Synchroscope, the monthly magazine (or house organ, as he calls it, which is weird) for Detroit Edison, the electric company. The keyliner is the guy who cuts and pastes together the whole magazine. To me, it sounds more like he should be a type of car. (Longer, wider, sleeker . . . Introducing the Ford Keyliner!) When I ask my mother why he’s late, she tells me that he was going to stop at Korvettes on his way home. I’m kind of peeved by this since it’s usually my job to go there with him on weekends, when he buys cigarettes for him and my mother. At 7:10 p.m., he finally shows up, squeezing through the back door, carrying a large cardboard box.
I’m home,
he announces. I can tell he’s in a good mood.
What’s in the box?
I ask.
You’ll see,
he says. I look at my mother, but she just shrugs.
We follow him down the basement stairs into our rumpus room, which he’s turning into a family room. I’m not sure of the difference, but he says a family room is more modern. His plans are to cover the cinder-block walls with paneling, then to build an Early American hutch with a mantle and shelves. He’s already tiled the floor and put furring strips along all the walls. He also got an avocado-green electric fireplace on sale at Arlan’s, which he installed with a wall of plastic stick-on bricks behind it, so it’s coming along nicely.
Once we’re downstairs, my father carefully sets the box down on the new linoleum. He slits open the top with his fingernail knife, rips back the flaps, and removes a couple blocks of snowy Styrofoam. He’s really taking his time.
You want to see what it is?
he says to me.
I don’t know why he’s being so mysterioso. Yeah. Come on, let’s see.
He reaches in and lifts out a brand-new Kor/Sonic stereo with a wood-grain and silver console, a glass-front radio dial, brushed metal knobs, and a record player with a smoked-plastic see-through dome.
A stereo system,
I say.
You got it.
Also from the box: two wood-grain speakers, fronts covered with tweedy cloth.
I thought someone was going to wait until he finished the basement before he bought one,
my mother says. She’s smiling, but I can hear the sarcasm in her voice.
It was on sale this week,
my father says. A really good price. A closeout.
Oh.
She’s satisfied now. My parents love bargains.
It doesn’t take him long to attach the speakers. Once he plugs it in and the wide eye of the receiver flickers awake with a golden light, I see a change in him. He keeps running his hand over the wood-grain console. Pretty sharp, eh?
It’s very nice, Hal.
Yeah,
I say.
My father twists a small knob to AM, then tunes it to CBE and the room is filled with a lush string version of Eleanor Rigby.
Listen to that.
We are,
my mother says.
I look to the steps leading upstairs and to the sunlight shifting through the window of the back door. It’s getting close to sunset. But I don’t have to worry because he twists the knob over to FM, adjusting it to the first station he finds. There’s the screech of a loud guitar, the bash of drums.
Ugh, turn that jungle music off,
my mother says.
He squints and searches until he finds an orchestra playing a song that I don’t recognize, but both my parents smile.
FM sounds great,
says my father. Listen to that.
We don’t for long. He switches to Phono, then a velvety hiss fills the basement. My father picks up the left speaker, untangles the wire, and places it in the corner of the room. He does the same with the right speaker.
Are you ready?
he says.
From a Korvettes bag that he must have carried in with the box, he pulls out an album called Super Stereo Sound Effects! As he slices the cellophane and extracts the record from the sleeve, my eyes are drawn to the designs on the cover—multicolored stripes, arrows, and uncoiled sound waves. By then, my father has the record on the turntable and we’re hearing the sound of a jet airplane taking off. I’ve never been near an airplane, but it’s got to sound like this. My father turns it up louder. My mother smiles, more strained this time.
Listen to that,
my father says yet again as he sits down. Pretty good for a small unit.
Hearing my father use the word unit makes him seem different to me. I can feel the sound in my chest now, vibrating my heart. It goes to