Be Good, My Starlight
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Naomi is an Amish single mother who realizes that she may never find a man who will accept both her and her son. Her family has tried to marry her off several times but she knows what she really wants : a marriage based on love rather than convenience. Soon a mysterious man comes into town and she feels an instant attraction to him. But will he accept the fact she has a son out of wedlock?
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Be Good, My Starlight - Natalie Salem
BE GOOD, MY STARLIGHT : AN AMISH ROMANCE
NATALIE SALEM
TABLE OF CONTENTS
BE GOOD, MY STARLIGHT
AMISH DREAMER
ROMANCE AT THE AMISH BAKERY
EMMA’S QUIET TOWN
AMISH COMPLICATIONS
ONE TRUE AMISH LOVE
AMISH HARVEST
AMELIA OF THE AMISH
Chapter One
Be good, my starlight, I love you,
Naomi said gently. She leaned down and hugged her son tight. He was just barely five, but was now old enough to start classes.
His golden hair looked nothing like her brown locks, his brown eyes were so dark compared to her green ones. He was hers, though, despite appearances. He was her entire world, and she knew that she'd do anything to make sure he was happy and unaware of the hardships she faced. He kissed her cheek, and then immediately ran off with a couple other boys to start their lessons.
Her family was setting her up with a stranger.
He was supposedly a good man.
Naomi was yet to see that, she knew that he'd be at her home with her family by the time she returned from her son's school. She knew he was a hard worker, that he had a daughter, and that he was ten years older than her.
She wasn't keen on him being thirty, but she knew that, given her circumstances, he was starting to look like the only option.
Naomi looked back at the school house as she started back home. The elderly teacher, Mister Lapp, was ushering in the last of the children, and she watched him with interest.
He had a job in this community.
A place.
Nobody would look at him and wonder why he was alone, or who he was.
She wished for a life so easy.
The soft summer grass gave way under her shoes as she headed back to the main street. Golden light, radiating off a bright morning sun, brought her entire village to life and motion around her.
Everyone was pleased to greet one another, everyone was starting their day and jobs.
Except her.
Nobody greeted her as she walked through the village, she kept her eyes averted in fear of any stray staring. She felt like how she imagined English must feel when they come into town with their shiny cars.
Different.
Unwanted.
She tried to distract herself, and remind herself of things she knew of Vernon.
He was 30, owned land as a farmer, was a widower. He had a daughter who was nearing seven and was in desperate need of a mother since she'd be out of school within the next handful of years.
Vernon sounded respectable.
Sounded like her only chance.
Still, as Naomi reached her family's home, she couldn't help but feel a pang of regret. A marriage without love wasn't much of a marriage. A marriage of convenience would help her family, help her reputation, help her life, but she'd still hurt. She'd still feel out of place and unhappy. She was sure of it. Naomi let herself in, pulled off her black bonnet, and reassured herself that this would be fine: she needed to think of her family and son first.
Naomi, are you home?
her father called from the kitchen. She could smell that her mother was cooking something, despite the fact that they all just had breakfast.
I am, father,
she replied, following his voice. The kitchen was large, but as she walked in, and felt all eyes upon her, it felt very tight and small.
A man she'd never seen before was standing in the corner sipping what smelled like very dark coffee. He was taller than her, his face shaven to show he was unmarried. She noted that he was handsome, that he looked sturdy and strong, but she felt no strong pull to him.
This is Vernon Miller,
her father introduced, motioning to the man. We were talking about the idea of marriage between you two,
he said flatly.
Naomi felt her heart drop.
She knew that this was her family's goal, but she'd thought she'd been given the chance to court first. She looked to her mother for help, but her mother just cast her eyes aside and turned back to cooking.
It's good to meet you,
Vernon said, standing and offering his hand to her. The action felt incredibly intimate, given what was just said, but she took his hand and shook it softly anyways. His grip was firm, his hand was warm.
She didn't want this.
Still, she knew better than to be rude.
Nice to meet you as well,
she replied.
Can I drive you home from church on Sunday?
he offered. Naomi almost laughed, that was the kind of courting only teenagers did, and he was almost twice the age he should be to ask.
Her father gave her a stern look, though.
I would like that,
she replied. Would you like more coffee?
I would be very thankful for more,
he answered, not taking his eyes off of hers. A blush flooded her cheeks from the attention, and Naomi quickly took his mug to get out of his sight.
He talked with her father comfortably about the farm work, about how much land he owned. It discomforted her to realize he was the same space in age from her parents as he was to her. She couldn't imagine her mother or father marrying someone so much younger than they were.
Naomi gave him his coffee, and he stopped to spare her a smile before he continued talking. He was trying harder to impress her parents than he was to impress her, she didn't mind. She was almost complemented to think that he actually wanted her.
Soon he was leaving, and she was set to work in the garden to keep it weeded and watered.
She was sure if she set her mind to it she could love him.
She was 20, the age most girls would be able to choose if they wanted to leave the church or not. The age most women would have dozens of offers and freedom to choose as they wished.
Yet she had to scramble and grab to get the one offer she did.
Her family loved her, cared about her, and they were trying to make sure that she lived happily. They didn't want to see her grow old and alone, with just her son in her life.
They didn't want her to have to spend her entire life in their home.
A plane passed overhead, and Naomi craned her neck and let herself watch it. She couldn't help but wonder, if her situation had been different and she were English instead, would she have been happier with that life?
She'd had the choice taken from her, though.
Naomi had sworn to the church and was going to live her whole life happily being a part of it.
She loved her son, John, would do anything to protect him and raise him well. She'd fallen pregnant with him at just fifteen.
Fallen from grace in the community when she gave birth to him at age fifteen.
She'd had many friends, had a fun life, before her pregnancy.
She'd gone to sings to meet boys, had been courted by two, and yet one poor decision had left her ostracized from everyone but family.
Sighing as the plane went out of sight, Naomi felt resigned.
She'd make herself fall in love with him.
Almost six years since she was found to be pregnant had passed, almost six years she had spent unwanted.
He wanted her.
He was interested in her.
She couldn't see herself getting another chance like this, and she didn't want to let down her family.
She'd love him eventually, she was sure of it.
Chapter Two
The next day, a bright and sunny Tuesday, Naomi and her son arrived to the school to find it closed. A sign hung on the door, white crisp paper with clear handwriting. When she could finally get close enough, through the gaggle of mothers and children reading it, she was shocked.
Mister Lapp, the elderly school teacher, had passed in the night from a heart attack.
Naomi walked John home, disturbed and unsure of how to explain it to him. He didn't have to deal with death yet, her parents, and her parent's parents, were all alive still.
She hadn't expected him to pass, then again she never really saw death coming for anyone. Once someone got to a certain age they moved back in with one of their children to live out their retirement in comfort. Most people didn't work until they died.
The rest of her day was spent more heavily considering marrying Vernon. If she passed he would be much more able to take care of her son than her aging parents or her two older siblings who had left the church.
The next day, despite her heart telling her the school would still be closed, she walked her son the same path she did most days.
Nobody else with children were about, nobody seemed to be heading to the school. She felt foolish at first, before realizing someone was in the school house.
The sign was gone from the door.
Hello?
she asked, holding her son's hand as she peeked inside the schoolhouse doors. There was a young man at the front of the classroom, flipping through a book. He looked up at the sound of her voice and smiled.
Hello! Please, come in,
he said, motioning to her and John. She couldn't help but notice the rest of the room was empty besides them, usually there were at least twenty children in class every day.
Where is everyone?
she asked, surprised.
I was just asking myself the same question,
he smiled sadly, looking pointedly around. They may be taking a day to grieve,
he offered as an explanation.
Must be,
she murmured, trying not to notice how handsome the man was. He had a strong jawline, but sweet blue eyes. His cheekbones were sharp, and they led her attention to his soft looking lips. His face was clean shaven. Unmarried.
His looks were hard to ignore.
I'll call it an off day, then,
he sighed, leaning back against his desk.
Are you from the area?
she found herself asking. She was sure she'd know if she'd seen him before. He was too attractive to be forgettable, and too close-looking to her age for him to have not been to the same sings and gatherings as her.
I've been caught,
he joked. He was lighthearted, warm. She was caught off guard and found herself savoring it. Not many people in her village even acted like she existed anymore. Years of shame had left her starving for any kind of positive attention. I'm from a town in Idaho, I wanted a move to see what the rest of our churches had to offer,
he explained.
Have you taught before?
Mommy can we go?
her son interrupted before the new man could answer.
John, I need you to have patience,
she said softly, leaning down to his height. He looked slightly scolded, but sat down in one of the chairs and waited.
He's so well behaved,
the new teacher said, watching him.
Thank you,
she said gently. A child who misbehaved was a bad mark on the parent and she knew it. A compliment on her son was a compliment to her.
Of course,
he replied. I'm Eli,
he walked towards her, offering his hand.
Naomi,
she said softly, accepting his hand and shaking it. She felt shocks go through her body at the contact. What was this feeling?
He let go of her hand slowly, and she immediately missed the contact.
I taught grades kindergarten through third for a year in Idaho,
he said, answering the question she'd asked earlier.
I see,
Naomi made herself answer.
She wanted to say more, to ask more, but she forced herself to have some control.
We should go,
she said after a moment, looking down at her son who was starting to drift off to sleep. Thank you, I'll make sure word gets out that there will be class tomorrow,
she said gently, smiling.
That would be very kind,
he smiled. Have a good day,
he offered.
You also,
she nodded, leading her son out.
She'd found him attractive.
More than that, she corrected herself, she was attracted to him.
Quietly she admonished herself as they headed back to her parent's home. She knew better than to seek the attention of men. She knew that it never worked out well for her.
Yet she found herself glancing back at the schoolhouse to see if she could catch a glimpse of the new teacher.
He was looking out the window back at them.
Color fled onto her cheeks and she looked back towards their path. He was handsome, educated. He had a job that would leave him being an important part of the community.
Eli.
She repeated his name in her mind.
It was a common name, but it felt special attached to him. She regretted not learning his last name, and as she had this thought more guilt fled her heart.
If he knew anything about her.
About her situation.
He wouldn't have been so sweet to her, she was sure of it.
Eli was kind because he was a teacher, because it was his job to be, not because he was interested in her. She took a deep breath and reminded herself that her family had picked a very suitable man for her anyways.
This was just cold feet.
Her family had laid a very straight line for her, and if she followed it she could be very happy.
Vernon was an older man, but he had lived there his whole life, had roots in the community. Eli was attractive and closer to her age, but he would want to start from scratch with a respectable wife.
Not with her.
Naomi scooped up her son and carried him the rest of the way home in her arms, trying not to admit to herself how excited she was to see Eli the next day.
Chapter Three
The next morning there were many people at the school.
Eli was talking, and smiling, and being more than friendly with the other mothers who had come. Naomi took it as confirmation that he really was just being nice to her.
She didn't need to read into him too much.
Tightening her bonnet a little she walked John the rest of the way to the school.
Miss Naomi,
he greeted her, his smile warm and welcoming.
I don't think I caught your last name,
she replied, also smiling.
Troyer,
he answered, a friendly sound in his voice.
Do take care of my boy, Mister Troyer,
she said softly.
He won't be too much trouble,
Eli replied, shaking his head and smiling.
Naomi spent the rest of the walk home memorizing his smile.
That evening she got to thank him for his care, again.
His face stayed in her mind.
You're smiling a lot today,
he mother commented, the water on the stove started to boil. Is it that you're keen to the idea of Mister Miller now?
she asked. There were no notes of teasing in her voice, it was an honest question.
I'm keen to the idea of marriage,
Naomi replied, keeping her answer vague.
She didn't want her mother to know.
The next day was Friday.
She tried to make excuses for herself as to why they were arriving at the school house a full twenty minutes later. The warm muffins in her basket were enough evidence to prove them all wrong.
Mister Troyer?
she knocked on the schoolhouse door and peeked in. He was looking through papers at his desk. At their intrusion he glanced at the wind-up clock on his desk.
You're early,
he said, it wasn't accusing or confused, he was almost pleased sounding.
I thought I'd welcome you properly to the community,
she offered, bringing forward the muffins.
They smell very good, thank you,
he said, standing to meet them halfway to the door.
Sorry about being so early, I was up early this morning and lost track of my time,
she apologized as he accepted the basket.
No, please, you're fine,
he replied, shaking his head. I haven't eaten today and these are a welcome sight,
he added.
She went home that day feeling like she was floating.
Friday turned into Saturday, and then soon it was Sunday and Vernon was greeting her at church.
She'd almost forgotten about him.
Now, after she'd spent so many days getting glimpses and small moments with Eli at the schoolhouse, Vernon seemed very different to her.
He was older, more of a man. She knew thirty wasn't old by any standards, but Eli was her age. Vernon seemed more stern