Discover Your Course for Life, One Step at a Time
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DISCOVER YOUR COURSE FOR LIFE
When we were kids, we all had exciting dreams of what our lives would be like when we were "grown up". Later in life, we wonder whether any of our dreams will ever come true.
Are you living the profound and fulfilling life you always dreamed of?
What if you could? What if you could enjoy every aspect of your life, because you have discovered your "calling", your mission and your purpose with absolute clarity? We don't just stumble into our dream lives; we must take an active part in pursuing a strategy to fulfill our purpose for life. Engaging in this interactive workbook you will: Get to know yourself at your core, and grow to love who you are Find motivation to take steps to meet your dreams Embrace a daily lifestyle that keeps you moving forward in your course for life
It's time to make the discovery and get on course. Your life is worth it! Using time-tested steps and focused scriptural texts, this book will partner with you, leading you into the most profound discovery of your life.
Ron Keller Ph.D.
Ron Keller has been a counselor/corporate consultant for more than 40 years. He is passionate about helping people discover and capitalize on their uniqueness in order to accomplish more than they could ever imagine or hope for. He has a Bachelors in Business, an MA in Theology and a Ph.D. in Counseling Psychology. He is the author of several books, two of them previously published by Thomas Nelson Publishing. Ron and his wife, Nancy, live in Minneapolis, Minnesota.
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Discover Your Course for Life, One Step at a Time - Ron Keller Ph.D.
DISCOVER
YOUR
COURSE
FOR LIFE
ONE STEP AT A TIME
RON KELLER, PH.D.
40323.pngCopyright © 1993, 2016 Ron Keller.
All rights reserved. No part of this book may be used or reproduced by any means, graphic, electronic, or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, taping or by any information storage retrieval system without the written permission of the author except in the case of brief quotations embodied in critical articles and reviews.
Some Scripture quotations are from the New King James Version of the Bible. Copyright © 1979, 1980, 1982, Thomas Nelson, Inc., Publishers. Other references to the Scriptures are paraphrases of passages from J.B. Phillips, Today’s English Version, Jerusalem Bible, and New International Bible Hyper-Bible.
To assure ultimate confidentiality, none of the individuals referred to in this book are identified by their real names. Though the case studies are real, the situations are disguised and modified. These stories have been written and/or shared with the author orally so they may be used to encourage others in their life journeys. The situations described have been gathered from small group gatherings all over the United States.
Originally published as Twelve Steps to a New Day: an interactive recovery workbook for spiritual growth / by Ron Keller.
Author Photo: Lauren B. Photography
WestBow Press
A Division of Thomas Nelson & Zondervan
1663 Liberty Drive
Bloomington, IN 47403
www.westbowpress.com
1 (866) 928-1240
Because of the dynamic nature of the Internet, any web addresses or links contained in this book may have changed since publication and may no longer be valid. The views expressed in this work are solely those of the author and do not necessarily reflect the views of the publisher, and the publisher hereby disclaims any responsibility for them.
Any people depicted in stock imagery provided by Thinkstock are models, and such images are being used for illustrative purposes only.
Certain stock imagery © Thinkstock.
ISBN: 978-1-5127-3670-0 (sc)
ISBN: 978-1-5127-3671-7 (hc)
ISBN: 978-1-5127-3669-4 (e)
Library of Congress Control Number: 2016905597
WestBow Press rev. date: 7/6/2016
Contents
Dedication
Acknowledgments
Why This Book?
Brief History and Invitation
Steps to discovering your course for life
1. I Admit that I am Powerless
2. I Can’t Change Myself––But God Can
3. Surrender Leads to Serenity
4. Know Yourself to Love Yourself
5. Free At Last
6. Ready
7. Asking For Healing
8. Sharing the Healing
9. Making Amends
10. Daily Review
11. My Most Important Daily Appointment
12. I Will Reach Out to Others
Steps to discovering your course for life with Scriptural references
Profile for Ron Keller, Ph.D.
More information about Ron Keller and Associates
Dedication
To my mother, Viola Margaret,
in recognition of her life-long
love, prayer, support, and
continuous encouragement
Acknowledgments
I am grateful for my family,
our children,
my mentors,
associates,
teachers,
and all of those who have invested in me.
I am grateful for many people who have helped me
in the writing and editing of this book,
especially the following:
Nancy Keller, my wife, for her loving patience
and prayerful encouragement.
Gail Steel, president of Prince of Peace Publishing, Inc.,
Burnsville, Minnesota, for her clear vision and
unwavering commitment to the success of the first version of this project.
Janet Thoma for her consistent, positive, skillful,
and careful editing of the second version of this book.
For Britney Ahlmann and her timely, professional input into this book and the Discover Your Course for Life process.
DeWayne Herbrandson for enabling this project
to take place by serving as agent and consultant.
The staff at Westbow Press
for their patient and persistent encouragement
in publishing the third version of this book.
Why This Book?
I have been in counseling, consulting, and leadership development for more than forty years. In all of those years, I have heard the persistent cry from people of all ages, in all walks of life: There must be more to life.
I am stuck.
I feel trapped.
I don’t have a life.
I need a new life.
My life, for the past forty-five years, has been dedicated to living that new life and helping others find it.
This book is a manual. It’s a workbook. It’s a course. It’s a step-by-step guide to take you into a new life, a life that will exceed all of your greatest expectations.
It will help you discover a new lifestyle filled with hope and freedom.
This book is part of a thorough process entitled Discover Your Course for Life.
More information is available at our website: Ronkellerassociates.com.
You have probably been studying all of your life … English, math, history, music. You might have a degree or two.
But have you ever taken a course in the study of yourself? A course that focuses on who you are? You already know it is more important to know yourself more than any other subject. If you don’t know yourself, you most likely can’t know what you should do to make the most of the gifts you have been given.
Imagine for a moment the joy and freedom you could experience when, without a doubt, you could look in the mirror and honestly, without hesitation say, I know you … I like you … I love you. I will take good care of you because you have a very important purpose in this life.
We as humans have been described as fearfully and wonderfully
made. The Scriptures tell us that deep down our soul
knows this very well. Using this book and the Discover process will help you get in touch and stay in touch with the real you—made and designed by God.
The steps used in this book will help you to get into the new life you have been designed to live. The steps are time tested. They offer the guaranteed promise of a new life. You take the steps, one at a time, and new life will come to you with each step.
The steps you will take in this book are based on simple principles rooted in hundreds of years of history and experience. They are based on biblical teaching combined with healthy common sense.
The first version of this book was published in 1989. A revised version was published by Thomas Nelson, Nashville, in 1993. Since 1997, the book has been self-published and has been translated into Spanish, Russian, Korean and Albanian, all by individuals needing the books to work with people in these countries.
There are no copyrights or royalties involved.
The book has been used by individuals and groups in schools, churches, home groups, corporate offices, and prisons.
Through the years, emails and letters have come from people everywhere to describe how the steps in this book have changed their lives.
As you take your first step, it is my prayer that you will discover the rich, new life you are invited to.
Brief History and Invitation
I started taking these steps when I was fifteen years old.
I am still taking a step every day … still discovering new life with each step.
When I was a senior in high school, I took the first step after much struggle and hardship. Through my father’s alcoholism, I learned that I am powerless. I could do nothing to change him, help him, or change my circumstances. What I could do is help myself, and the first step to doing that was admitting to myself, to God, and to another person that I am powerless.
Much relief came in taking that first step. There was and is much more relief to come with each reminder that I am powerless and with each step I take.
The book you have in your hands (or electronic device) is a compilation of my and many other people’s stories and experiences, all pointing to the hope of discovering a new life.
The steps used in this book are adapted from the old twelve steps of Alcoholics Anonymous (AA). You will quickly discover you do not need to be an alcoholic to apply these steps to your own life.
The principles of the twelve steps have been with us for centuries. In the 1940’s, the founders of Alcoholics Anonymous found a way to capsulize and distill those principles into a powerful process that has saved thousands (millions) of lives.
Those principles were never meant to be isolated and applied to only those who had addiction to alcohol. However, as time went on, the twelve steps and AA became synonymous. In other words, if you were using the twelve steps, you must be an alcoholic.
The stigma of being an alcoholic prevented most people from thinking there was any reason or need for them to learn about or apply the twelve-step lifestyle to themselves.
It’s only in the past few years that authors like me have attempted to open the door for all of us—anyone—to embrace and reap the benefits of the twelve-step process. Some of these benefits include discovering the abundant life,
a better understanding of our purpose for life, day-by-day direction and guidance in investing our lives in those matters that are truly significant.
The principles of this book have eternal value. They will be forever relevant.
Helping each new generation understand and apply these principles has been a creative challenge and one of the reasons for this book in its third revision.
While the principles of this book have eternal value, they need continuous adaptation to stay one step ahead of the constant erosion that’s taking place in our culture.
I have been in a full-time leadership role for more than forty-five years.
My role has included leadership training, teaching, management, coaching, marriage counseling, corporate consulting, ministry training, team building, pre-marriage counseling, spiritual direction, workshop/retreat leadership, curriculum design, writing, and speaking.
In all of these roles, my purpose has been the same. My role has been that of an ambassador, one who represents another, serving that person and that person’s agenda. In all of these roles, the basic twelve-step and scriptural principles presented in this book have permeated my relationships and activities.
My desire and focus has always been on serving the One who first loved and served me.
In these forty-five years, I have felt an urgent and growing need to encourage and train creative and servant leaders who will have it as their goal to have their hearts, minds, and eyes clearly focused on our common leader, our Lord Jesus Christ, and His purpose for our lives.
The Promises of a New Life
If anyone is in a relationship with Jesus Christ, that person is a new creation, the old has passed away and the new has come.
—2 Corinthians 5:17
I have come to bring you life, life in all its fullness.
—John 10:10
Chapter 1
I ADMIT
THAT I AM
POWERLESS
40843.png–––––––––––––––––—––––––
Step 1:
–––––––––––––––––—––––––
I admit that I am
–––––––––––––––––—––––––
powerless over certain
–––––––––––––––––—––––––
parts of my life and I
–––––––––––––––––—––––––
need God’s help.
–––––––––––––––––—––––––
When I was a teenager, the biggest problem I had to live with every day was my dad’s drinking. He was an alcoholic. I never knew what to expect from him. Would he be drunk or sober? Did he mean what he was saying, or didn’t he? Could I count on him or not?