Delphic Oracle U.S.A.
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Delphic Oracle U.S.A. - Steven Mayfield
Praise for Delphic Oracle U.S.A.
"A curious cast of characters, a mythical town, $10,000 missing, and we’re on the hoof with Steven Mayfield’s captivating Delphic Oracle, U.S.A. With twists and turns and relationships as slippery as eels, Mayfield weaves together a story that will delight readers of all ages."
—Susan Wingate, #1 Amazon bestseller and award-winning author
"This wonderful book, spanning decades, is quirky in the best sense of the word. Hop aboard and be charmed by tornado chasers, Shakespeare-spouting gangsters on the lam, and countless others in a multi-generational romp that rolls along with the fevered pitch of a screwball comedy. Full of heart, full of fun, full of family—a splendid homage to the fine folks of Delphic Oracle U.S.A."
—Alice Kaltman, Pushcart-nominated author of Dawg Towne, Wavehouse, and The Tantalizing Tale of Grace Minnaugh
"Mayfield is an astonishing storyteller—Flannery O’Connor with sunshine. I read Treasure of the Blue Whale and hoped he would serve up another ordered universe fluid with imperfections and missed opportunities, botched plans and deformities of all kinds. And now he has! Delphic Oracle, U.S.A. is a small town where unlikelies are never misfits, where idiosyncrasy is the norm, and best of all, there’s a place for everyone. Closing this new Mayfield novel, you know in your deepest heart that we belong to each other."
—Mary Rakow, award-winning author of The Memory Room and This is Why I Came
There’s magic in Mayfield’s deeply American tale, tracing a family’s exotic history with humor and humanity.
—Dan Kopcow, Author of Prior Futures and Worst. Date. Ever.
Mayfield’s prose lets readers instantly know that they are in good hands, that a clever adventure is before them. He incites real belly laughs, then quietly disarms.
—Jennifer Bowen Neergaard, BookHive
You laugh and cry over the tender acceptance of our humanly human condition.
—Barbara Herrick, author of The Blackberry Tea Club
Delphic Oracle, U.S.A.
Steven Mayfield
Regal House Publishing
Copyright © 2022 Steven Mayfield. All rights reserved.
Published by
Regal House Publishing, LLC
Raleigh, NC 27587
All rights reserved
ISBN -13 (paperback): 9781646032921
ISBN -13 (epub): 9781646032938
Library of Congress Control Number:
All efforts were made to determine the copyright holders and obtain their permissions in any circumstance where copyrighted material was used. The publisher apologizes if any errors were made during this process, or if any omissions occurred. If noted, please contact the publisher and all efforts will be made to incorporate permissions in future editions.
Interior by Lafayette & Greene
Cover images © by C. B. Royal
Author photograph by Hunnicutt Photography
Regal House Publishing, LLC
https://regalhousepublishing.com
The following is a work of fiction created by the author. All names, individuals, characters, places, items, brands, events, etc. were either the product of the author or were used fictitiously. Any name, place, event, person, brand, or item, current or past, is entirely coincidental.
All rights reserved. No part of this publication may be reproduced, stored in a retrieval system, or transmitted, in any form or by any means, electronic, mechanical, photocopying, recording, or otherwise, without the prior permission of Regal House Publishing.
Printed in the United States of America
Dedication
This book is dedicated to my dear mother-in-law, Netta Baker Bindel—sweet as honey-comb, tough as a leather glove, always color-coordinated.
Also by Steven Mayfield
Howling at the Moon
Treasure of the Blue Whale
Prologue
A Fair Warning
You are born with a mother and a father, always in a place. The place is part of you, as inescapable as a fingerprint. Where are you from? In your heart, you know the truth. You are from the place you were born. I am from a town in Nebraska once known as Miagrammesto Station. I have never truly lived anywhere else. I never will. You are new here. Welcome. You are about to meet a great many people, too many to keep track of at first. Don’t worry. You needn’t remember them all. Some will become friends, others mere acquaintances. You’ll forget a few that matter, hang onto a few that don’t. Our little place includes a man unable to discern the difference between destiny and storm warnings, one with religion but no faith, one with faith but no religion, a kid known as Samson the Methodist, and a quartet of confused lovers. Here’s a tip: among the folks inhabiting these pages are a librarian, a con man, an enchantress, and a skeleton. Keep your eye on them. They will help answer the question of how a place called Miagrammesto Station became home to the long-lost Oracle of Delphi.
My name is Peter Goodfellow—Delphic Oracle, Nebraska city manager and inmate at the Luther Burbank Correctional Facility. I’m also the parish priest at St. Mary’s—Father Peter—but don’t be put off. It’s a job, so these pages will not narrate a religious fable, but the stories of three families: the Goodfellows, the Penrods, and the Thorntons. Some of what I’ll tell you was acquired as a boy at the knee of my great-grandmother, Willa Louise Goodfellow. She was born when our town was known as Miagrammesto Station and died at one hundred years and six days old after it had become Delphic Oracle. Grammie Willa knew everything about this little settlement just north of the Platte River, including the story of Maggie Westinghouse and the notorious July Pennybaker. In a time when Delphic Oracle was known as Miagrammesto Station, a fox named July Pennybaker came to town,
Grammie Willa claimed. The fox was sly, but he chose to pursue a clever hen. Bent on chicanery, he ended up seeking redemption.
Peter Goodfellow
July 3, 2015
1
Miagrammesto Station
It began in 1919 after a frigid and gray winter was followed by a windy, unpredictable spring," Grammie Willa always began her story. Fortunately, the end of May welcomed a fruitful summer and long, warm autumn. It made Miagrammesto Station a hospitable place far into October, its residents quick to welcome Maggie Westinghouse and her mother after the travel-weary pair stepped off the afternoon train about a week before Halloween. The two wore thin coats and told the story of a courageous husband and father, allegedly killed in the final days of the The War To End All Wars, leaving behind his lovely wife and a daughter, then eleven years old.
All over the country the boys who had survived the Major’s war had been home for months and the raging Spanish flu pandemic was on the wane. Meanwhile, the withering drought and unforgiving winds that sent many a farm swirling into the white-hot Midwestern sky were more than a decade off. Miagrammesto Station was a bustling county seat serving the dozens of farms dotting the valley—a place boasting two doctors, three car dealerships, and eight thriving religious denominations. As the new decade of the 1920s approached, most horse-drawn wagons had been replaced by Fords or Chevys, but radio had yet to take over the evenings, leaving people free to sit on their porches with glasses of lemonade, making fun of the frenetic and decadent city folk who gambled for a living at that faraway and profligate casino called Wall Street.
Like Major Westinghouse, the town’s dentist, Doctor Plutarch Roberts, had also served during The War To End All Wars, although the closest he came to the trenches in Europe was a converted supply shed at Fort Benning where he spent the war rummaging through the mouths of stateside officers and the petticoats of their wives. Unblemished by combat, the unctuously handsome Doctor Roberts hired Maggie’s mother as his assistant, providing a small stipend and the apartment above his office. With his encouragement, the community embraced the young widow even though visitors to their tiny flat discovered not a single photograph of brave Major Westinghouse. Even more curious, broodingly beautiful little Maggie bore a remarkable resemblance not only to silent film vamp Theda Bara but to the landlord, as well.
Maggie and her mother settled in. Maggie enrolled at the South Ward School, proving to be as clever as she was beautiful, while her mother remained ostensibly steadfast to the elusive memory of her gallant Major. A delicate woman with the singing voice of an angel, Mrs. Westinghouse slowly overcame the waggling tongues. Likewise, the perplexing history and provocative resemblance her daughter shared with Doctor Roberts was eventually overlooked, although the unveiled sniping of Violet Roberts, the dentist’s thin-lipped, aspish wife, eventually forced Maggie and her mother from the unadorned pews of St. Luke’s Methodist Church and into the open arms of the Episcopalians.
Five years later, in 1924, July Pennybaker appeared in Chicago with a reckless gash of a grin and a bagful of delectably outlandish claims. He was an ace pilot in the war,
some said, while others were told the story of a financial wunderkind on Wall Street who’d abandoned riches to seek wisdom and tranquility in the monasteries of Tibet. July claimed to have visited mythical Shangri-La and trekked the Khyber Pass under the protection of the Crown Prince of Afghanistan. He described traveling by camel to Damascus on the legendary Silk Road, afterward making his way to Istanbul, and then taking the Orient Express to Vienna. Eventually, he ended up in Paris, consorting in the City of Light with Picasso, Gertrude Stein, and a boisterous writer named Hemingway. July Pennybaker claimed to have been a magician and a bartender and a barber—to have ridden with Pancho Villa, discoursed with an exiled pre-revolutionary Lenin, and walked along the Great Wall with Sun Yat-sen. He was handsome with an enviable head of hair, alarmingly blue eyes, the body of a trapeze artist, and the shameless charm of a chautauqua preacher.
Bugs Moran—a member of the North Side O’Banion mob—latched onto July, moving the flamboyant adventurer into his inner circle of thugs even though the fast-talking stranger seemed more interested in Moran’s accounting than his firearms. July soon had a closet-full of tailored suits that draped as easily over his athletic frame as the pretty girls who hung on his arm. He affected a Chicago accent, remembered the names of everyone he met, and tipped nearly as well as rival mobster Scarface Capone. Best of all he could sing like an Irish devil and soon became a favorite at McGovern’s Saloon. Bugs loved him. The rest of the O’Banion gang didn’t and it wasn’t long before Hymie Weiss and Schemer Drucci were in Bugs’s ear, pointing out that July Pennybaker always seemed to be missing when the bullets started flying. They convinced Bugs that their dashing colleague needed to make his bones or become a pile of them.
Not long thereafter—on a January day in 1925 with glacial wind shrieking off Lake Michigan and the sky drab with overcast—July waited with Bugs, Hymie, and Schemer outside rival mob boss Papa Johnny Torrio’s South Clyde Avenue apartment. Bugs, Hymie, and Schemer had their own guns. Bugs had loaned July a fully loaded .38. By the time Papa Johnny emerged, the shooters—alleged in the next day’s Chicago Tribune to include …a fourth unknown assailant
had been waiting for three hours. They were cold and impatient, three of the gunmen letting loose a torrent of bullets. Afterward, the assassins headed to McGovern’s to celebrate, tossing back one drink each and about to tip another, when news reached them that Torrio had survived. Bugs dispatched July to finish the job and the glib talker, without a single mob scalp to his credit, headed out. An hour passed, then two, then six. July did not return. Soon thereafter, Bugs discovered an empty space in his office safe where ten thousand dollars had resided.
Bugs was fond of July and willing to forgive his failure to put even one bullet into Papa Johnny. However, there wasn’t a man alive whose charms could compete with ten thousand dollars. Bugs raged for a while, kicking a hole in the wall of his office, throwing a paperweight through the window, and shooting out the streetlamp across the street. Afterward, he instructed Hymie and Schemer to find July, get his money back, and then offer their former associate accommodations at the bottom of Lake Michigan. The two goons were delighted and rushed over to July’s apartment on North Dearborn. The flat was deserted save a dog-eared English translation of Parallel Lives on the bedside table and a phalanx of expensive suits in the armoire. The pockets in the suits were as empty as Bugs’s safe. July Pennybaker had skipped town.
The attempted hit on Papa Johnny enraged his second-in-command, Al Capone. The violent and impulsive gangster loved Torrio—a mentor since the old days in New York—and he put a bounty on the shooters. I’m gonna personally put their god-damned brains on a baseball bat,
he vowed. Word crisscrossed the nation’s criminal underbelly, but six months after the hit on Papa Johnny, the whereabouts of Bugs Moran’s former favorite remained unknown.
The same year that July disappeared, Maggie Westinghouse was seventeen years old and had begun to suffer visions that visited her in a leisurely way, provoking laughter and mostly incoherent babbling. Always, they ended in a swoon and troubled sleep. She spoke while slumbering, describing exotic locales or carrying on spirited conversations with unseen beings, afterward waking with no memory of what had transpired. Folks around town had always been a little cowed by Maggie,
Grammie Willa recollected. She was beautiful and men made fools of themselves while a lot of women tried to even things out by whittling away at her reputation.
She spent a lot of time on her own, Grammie told me, taking long walks that took her to the edge of town and beyond. It was June, 1925, when Maggie walked along the tracks near the Miagrammesto Station fairgrounds and saw the door to a railroad switch-house propped open. Inside, she discovered a man asleep on a pile of gunnysacks.
-
2
Teddy
Eighty-nine years after Maggie Westinghouse discovered July Pennybaker asleep in a railroad switch-house, Nick Dolny asserted to me, my little brother, Teddy, and a handful of regulars at the Cozy Lunch Bar & Grill that wives live longer than their husbands because, they ain’t married to women.
A wellspring of misogyny, Nick would have gone on had the sound of thunder and a weatherman on the TV mounted on the wall behind the bar not cut him off.
We bring this weather alert from KOLN-Channel 10,
the broadcaster intoned. The possibility of severe thunderstorms accompanied by damaging winds or tornadoes now exists in an area east of Alinin, Kansas, extending from Marysville west to Smith Center and south to Salina.
Teddy slipped off his barstool and headed for the door, abandoning a nearly full longneck Budweiser that was quickly claimed by our brother-in-law, Francis Wounded Arrow—the half-Lakota Sioux handyman carefully peeling the label from the bottle as if to preserve a treasure map on its underside.
Hey,
Nick called out, where you goin’?
Alinin, Kansas,
Teddy replied without slowing.
My little brother has known for years that Alinin is not a target of God’s wrath—a forlorn town singled out in nearly all tornado warnings and condemned to quiver in the path of every rogue plains twister darting out of a dark summer sky. It actually isn’t a town at all but a map line—not Alinin, Kansas, but a line in Kansas. I explained this to Teddy when he was about twelve years old. At the time, we were huddled in the basement of the rambling family home where he and I and our four siblings were raised. The same somber TV weatherman had sent us scrambling down the creaky wooden steps to a dank cellar dominated by a huge cylindrical furnace with ductwork that made the thing look like a robotic octopus. We bring this weather alert from KOLN-Channel 10,
the broadcaster had intoned. The possibility of severe thunderstorms accompanied by damaging winds or tornadoes now exists in an area east of a line in Kansas, extending from Marysville west to Smith Center and south to Salina.
More than twenty years had elapsed since that night. Nevertheless, the latest storm warning on the TV put Teddy in the wind, sending him into one of those sweltering and ponderous Nebraska summer nights when the air is like a living thing—a night when gray-umber twilight slowly spreading across the flatlands brings Nebraskans to their knees, supplicants before the cooling rain, beacons to the jolting thunderclaps. Such weather has always made Teddy feel that destiny is upon him. On that night, he had yet to understand the difference between destiny and storm warnings.
Just got up and left?
Teddy’s wife, Monica, asked when Nick called to see if he’d made it home.
Hopped off the stool, gave us that Myrna Lisa smile of his, and then took off,
Nick reported.
Toward the theater?
Monica asked. Teddy runs the Rialto Cinema—one of the businesses our family owns. Shuttered in 1975 when folks in town fell under the spell of a then-novel four-screen multiplex in Zenith, Teddy reopened the place in 1995, adding a beer and wine service. If you lubricate them, they will come,
he always jokes and he’s right. The theater has done well with folks in Zenith now willing to drive twenty-five miles in our direction for a glass of chardonnay with their popcorn. He went into the movie business after Mom fired him from the town insurance agency—another concern we Goodfellows own, along with the Penrod Hotel and coffee shop, the Delphic Oracle Banner-Press, the Miagrammesto County Bank, and a parcel near the Platte River where one of my sisters keeps her horses.
For all of it, we owe thanks to the perspicacity of our progenitor, Angus Penrod, who founded our town as a trading post he christened Miagrammesto Station. I don’t know how he chose that name. Aunt Felicity claims that old Angus imagined himself descended from Greek scholars even though he was mostly Scotch-Irish. As for Teddy’s dismissal from the Goodfellow Insurance Agency, please understand that we love my little brother, but agreed with Mom and Dad and Uncle Grey that he was a terrible salesman and the worst claims adjustor in the history of claims adjusting. Besides, Teddy was happy to be fired. It gave him an excuse to resurrect the Rialto, something he’d always wanted to do. Teddy loves movies.
Toward the theater?
Monica repeated when Nick didn’t respond.
"No, he wasn’t gonna close up. Jeez, Monica, he never closes up himself. He lets one of them high school kids do it. You know that."
Monica and Nick have never liked each other. Although opposites in nearly every way, Nick and Teddy have been friends since they were toddlers and Nick is a jealous sort. Monica doesn’t help matters. She hauls around a bucket-full of one-liners to use on Nick. He’s an easy target—a scrawny chicken leg of a man with thin lips, slightly pointed ears, and a head full of conspiracy theories. She held back that night, partly because it was getting late and she was tired, but mostly because it’s simply too easy to make a fool of a fellow like Nick who thinks a thesaurus is a dinosaur.
Which way then?
South.
You’re sure?
Nick made a whistling sound as he exhaled through the generous gap between his front teeth. ’Course I’m sure,
he snapped. "Why would I make up something like that? I don’t make up things. You know that."
Right…okay then,
Monica said. "By the way, it’s Mona Lisa, not Myrna Lisa. You should know that."
She hung up and was about to phone her mother-in-law when one of her three girls called out. An hour or so later she had convinced the younger two that flies wouldn’t lay eggs in their ears if they went to sleep, something their big sister had suggested. It was almost eleven o’clock by the time Monica checked in with Mom. Teddy hadn’t been there either. It was June 30, 2014, and my little brother was on the clock.
Around the time I left my cell at The Luther the next morning, Teddy called his wife. He was nowhere near Alinin, Kansas. During the long, moonless night he had decided to head for New York City.
We’re not home right now,
Monica’s recorded voice told him, unless you’re a burglar, in which case we’re out separating the pit bulls.
A flutter of background giggles followed.
…Leave a message and we’ll get back to you when we can.
It ended with their three daughters growling into the phone.
This is Teddy,
he began, eyes watery with tears. I’m sorry I didn’t come home last night. I’m on the road…to the east…South Bend, Indiana. I’ll call again…I love you all.
Monica, waist-deep in swimming lessons with the girls when he called, didn’t listen to his message until about an hour later. Afterward, she again called her mother-in-law. My mom, Rachel Goodfellow, is from a generation reared without fear of salt or saturated fats. She believes in doughnuts and immediately came over with fresh dozen.
"Did he run The Searchers last night?" she asked once seated at the kitchen table with Monica. Teddy loves The Searchers, a classic western from the 1950s that starred John Wayne. He has a special screening at the Rialto every few months. We Goodfellows and Penrods all come, because we’re family. Not many others do.
Monica nodded. Yeah, he wrote another poem about it too.
I wish he would stop doing this,
Mom said, nibbling on a maple donut.
In Teddy’s defense, I have to point out that he was a dedicated homebody until Dad died five years ago. Shortly thereafter, he began to experience unexplained melancholy and longing that hit him like bouts of influenza. This happens to a lot of men at midlife. I don’t understand such afflictions, but I’ve never believed life to be about what you’ll miss when you’re gone or what you’ve missed out on already. It’s about enjoying good things as they happen. Things like lunch…and baseball.
Has he called yet?
Mom asked her daughter-in-law.
Monica’s youngest daughter, three-year-old Lizzy, padded into the kitchen, hair still wet, her shiny eyes rimmed in red after her morning in the swimming pool. The little girl reached out and pinched her mother’s sleeve with two fingers.
He phoned this morning,
Monica said, lifting Lizzy onto her lap.
Did he say where he was going?
The two women studied each other for a moment and then laughed.
New York City,
they said together.
Less than an hour later Nick Dolny stopped by the Penrod Hotel, a place fragrant with cigar smoke and leather club chairs. Edmund Dogberry—town mayor and Ford dealer—was in the adjoining coffee shop, finishing off the last of the Tuesday special: chicken pot pie. He’s on the run,
Nick said. Afterward, Ed went downstairs to Snug Nixon’s barber shop.
Whattaya say, Ed?
Snug yelled. Snug always yells because he’s under the impression that the closer he is to a person, the louder he must speak. Our town mayor is just as loud, his own volume knob perpetually on high.
Get the pool going,
Ed yelled back.
This is how everyone in Delphic Oracle knew by one p.m. that Teddy was gone again. My aunt, Felicity Penrod, interviewed witnesses to determine when the wheels of Teddy’s car had most likely cleared the city limit, then officially confirmed the starting time as June 30, 2014, at 9:30 p.m. Soon, yellow Post-it notes—each representing a bet of ten dollars—dotted a large, homemade calendar ceremoniously propped atop the television in Snug’s shop, a walk-down below the hotel with a swiveling barber chair and a row of battered seats backed up to the window well. A name, date, and time were handwritten on each note. When I dropped in for a trim Snug was explaining the logic behind his pick in the pool—July 3rd, 3:22 p.m.—three days, seventeen hours, and fifty-two minutes from Felicity’s certified date and time of departure.
I don’t care what Felicity says,
Snug told us Teddy left Cozy’s about nine-twenty. I was there. I looked at my watch. It was nine-twenty. The way I see it—
Your watch is slow,
Francis Wounded Arrow—my eldest sister Justine’s husband—interrupted. The clock above the bar said nine-twenty-five…on the button. I don’t care what you think you saw. That’s how me and Father Peter seen it.
…and I figure Teddy had to sneak into the garage to get his tent and stuff,
Snug went on, aiming a frown at Francis, so, I’m betting he didn’t leave town until at least ten-oh-five. Now, whaddaya get if you average out the last five pools and then subtract the forty-five minutes Felicity didn’t count? July third, three-twenty-two in the afternoon, that’s what.
Francis sat in Snug’s barber chair, idly cruising his fresh crew-cut with the palm of a meaty hand that looked as if it had been worked over by a hammer or two, which, indeed, it had. C’mon, Snug,
he rebutted. It didn’t take him no forty-five minutes to get geared up. He was already packed. He’s always packed. Everybody knows that. He keeps a kit in the garage. All he has to do is toss it in the car and go.
Francis raised a pair of shaggy eyebrows to underscore his point. Besides,
he added, he was all hound-doggy. He don’t get hound-doggy till he’s packed. That’s a historical fact.
Who asked you, Francis?
Snug barked. Did anybody ask you? Why do you always shove in two cents worth of bullcrap while I’m still talking?
I’m just sayin’ Teddy was ready to go.
Yeah, well say it on your own time…and get outta my chair. Your haircut is over. You wanna sit in the chair, it’ll cost you ten bucks.
Snug shot a stink-eye across the room, ominously slapping one of his straight-edged razors across a strop until Francis sullenly climbed out of the barber chair and slouched into one of the seats backed up against the window well, his two cents worth of interruption still burning a hole in his pocket.
I already paid you for the trim, Snug,
Francis grumbled. You can’t make a fella pay for just parkin’ in that there chair.
He looked at me for help. I’m pretty sure that’s the law, ain’t it, Father?
I don’t think it’s a law, Francis,
I said.
Snug suddenly pointed his straight razor at us, its edge worked over until it was nearly invisible. Teddy likes to come back at six or so in the evening,
he shouted.
Yeah, but you picked July third,
Francis threw in. That’s a Friday. Teddy likes to come back on Sundays.
Despite the ominous razor, Snug