The Confident Mind: A Battle-Tested Guide to Unshakable Performance
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About this ebook
Believe and be unshakable.
The Director of West Point’s influential Performance Psychology Program shares the secrets of mental toughness and self-belief in this definitive guide to mastering confidence, the key to performance in any field.
Dr. Nate Zinsser has spent his career training the minds of the U.S. Military Academy’s cadets as they prepare to lead and perform when the stakes are the very highest—on the battlefield. Alongside this work, he has coached world-class athletes including a Super Bowl MVP, numerous Olympic medalists, professional ballerinas, NHL All-Stars, and college All-Americans, teaching them to overcome pressure and succeed on the biggest stages.
Dr. Zinsser has come to understand that one single trait above all others makes peak performance possible: confidence, or the belief in oneself. Whether your mission involves leading a platoon into combat, returning an opponent’s serve, or delivering a sales pitch to a roomful of skeptical prospects, you perform best when you are so certain about your abilities that your flow of fear, doubts, and confusion slows to the barest minimum. What’s more, Dr. Zinsser has come to understand that confidence is a skill that can be taught, improved, and applied by anyone to enhance nearly every aspect of our lives and careers.
Now, for the first time, Dr. Zinsser distills his research and years of experience, offering a fascinating guide to the science of confidence and providing readers with a practical, step-by-step program to best harness their belief in themselves to achieve success in any field. The Confident Mind is a complete guide to confidence: how to understand it, how to build it, how to protect it, and how to rely upon it when your performance matters most.
Dr. Nate Zinsser
Dr. Nate Zinsser is a renowned performance psychology expert who has taught three generations of soldiers, athletes, and executives to master the art of confidence and mental toughness. Dr. Zinsser is the director of the Performance Psychology Program at the United States Military Academy at West Point, the most comprehensive mental-training program in the country, where, since 1992, he has helped prepare cadets for leadership in the U.S. Army. He also has been the sport-psychology mentor for numerous elite athletes, including two-time Super Bowl MVP Eli Manning and the NHL’s Philadelphia Flyers, as well as many Olympians and NCAA champions. He has been a consultant for the FBI Academy, U.S. Army Recruiting Command, and the New York City Fire Department. He earned his PhD in sport psychology from the University of Virginia.
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The Confident Mind - Dr. Nate Zinsser
Dedication
To all who choose to go beyond the everyday normal and dare to pursue what they might be
Epigraph
Victorious warriors win first and then go to war, while defeated warriors go to war first and then seek to win.
—SUN TZU, THE ART OF WAR
Contents
Cover
Title Page
Dedication
Epigraph
Preface
Introduction: What Confidence Is and Isn’t
Chapter One: Accepting What You Cannot Change
Chapter Two: Building Your Bank Account #1: Filtering Your Past for Valuable Deposits
Chapter Three: Building Your Bank Account #2: Constructive Thinking in the Present
Chapter Four: Building Your Bank Account #3: Envisioning Your Ideal Future
Chapter Five: Protecting Your Confidence Every Day, No Matter What
Chapter Six: Deciding to Be Different
Chapter Seven: Entering the Arena with Confidence
Chapter Eight: Playing a Confident Game from Start to Finish
Chapter Nine: Ensuring the Next First Victory: Reflect, Plan, and Commit—or What? So What? and Now What?
Epilogue: The Bus Driver, the General, and You
Acknowledgments
Appendix I: Performance Imagery Script Sample
Appendix II: After Action Review Worksheets
Reference Notes
Index
About the Author
Copyright
About the Publisher
Preface
On August 17, 2011, New York Giant quarterback Eli Manning sat for a live ESPN radio interview after his practice during the Giants training camp. When asked if he was a Top 10, Top 5
quarterback, Manning said, I think I am.
And then when asked specifically if he was on the same level as New England Patriots quarterback Tom Brady, Manning paused and then said, Yeah, I consider myself in that class . . . and Tom Brady is a great quarterback.
Manning’s statements touched off a torrent of media hysteria. Columnists and bloggers wrote at length about how indefensible Manning’s opinion was. How in the world could Manning, with only one Super Bowl championship and MVP award and only two Pro Bowl appearances on his résumé, compare himself to Brady, the six-time Pro Bowler, three-time champion, and two-time NFL MVP? Brady was coming off an excellent 2010 season, throwing thirty-six touchdown passes and only four interceptions, while Manning had thrown a league-high twenty-five interceptions. How could Manning think of himself as Brady’s peer?
The answer to that question goes right to the heart of human performance: Eli Manning believes he’s as good as any QB in the league because he knows he has to believe it. He understands what all champions either know intuitively or have learned during their careers: a performer has no choice but to be totally confident in him- or herself if the true goal is to perform at their top level.
Confidence makes one’s peak performance possible, and that’s why it’s of such great importance to anyone who has to step into an arena and deliver their best. Think for a moment about Eli’s reality. Most fall and winter Sunday afternoons, he’s onstage in front of eighty thousand spectators and millions more watching on TV; his every action on the field (and plenty of them on the sideline) will be analyzed, judged, and criticized by football experts and casual fans alike. If he doesn’t have the conviction that he can do his job as well as anyone else (even the guy many consider to be the greatest of all time), then he invites uncertainty, hesitation, tension, and mediocrity into his game. Without that level of confidence, Eli Manning would never play as well as he is capable.
And Manning isn’t alone. Every quarterback in the NFL has to have that same level of confidence to play his best. In fact, every contestant in any other competitive pursuit needs it just as much to maximize his or her performance. I’m not just referring to those relatively few individuals who compete in college, professional, or Olympic sports: I’m describing anyone who is striving to achieve success in any field. No matter what game
you happen to play, you perform best in that state of certainty where you no longer think about how you will hit the ball, throw the ball, or make the move/speech/proposal or about what the implications of winning and losing might be. All those thoughts interfere with (1) your perception of the situation (like the flight of the ball or the movement of an opponent or the understanding of a customer), (2) your automatic recall from your stored experiences of the proper response, and (3) your unconscious instructions to your muscles and joints about how precisely to contract and relax in sequence to make the right move or the right comment at the right instant. Whether your game involves instantly reading a hostile defense and delivering a football to the right spot, returning an opponent’s serve, or delivering a sales pitch to a roomful of skeptical prospects, you perform more consistently at the top of your ability when you are so certain about yourself, so confident in yourself, that your stream-of-conscious thoughts slow down to the barest minimum.
Back to Eli and his confident assertion that he was in the same class as Tom Brady. Fast-forward from that training camp interview in August 2011 to February 5, 2012, to the conclusion of that season’s Super Bowl. Eli Manning is standing at the center of Lucas Oil Stadium in Indianapolis hoisting the championship trophy and receiving his second Super Bowl MVP award. Manning’s New York Giants have just come from behind to defeat Tom Brady’s favored New England Patriots. In the closing minutes of the fourth quarter, with the Giants trailing, Manning engineered the 88-yard game-winning drive, making four clutch throws, including a 38-yard pinpoint completion to a tightly covered receiver, unanimously regarded as the play of the game.
Eli Manning showed the world that on that field, on that day, he was indeed a Top 10, Top 5 quarterback,
and that his statement the previous summer was simply the honest expression of a confident competitor.
Now here’s a little secret . . . Eli Manning didn’t always have that level of total confidence. Despite being the number one pick in the 2003 NFL draft, he had a rough transition from college to the pros, and many questioned whether he’d ever live up to the high expectations that come with being a first-round selection and lead his team to a championship. But in March 2007, Eli Manning started working with me for the express purpose of becoming a stronger, more confident leader
with a swagger to match his conscientious preparation.
Eleven months later, after diligently working the process of building, protecting, and applying his confidence, Eli Manning led the Giants to a victory in Super Bowl XLII (over Tom Brady’s undefeated and heavily favored New England Patriots). All season long he had been turning heads, with sportswriters and sportscasters noting, This is a different Eli Manning.
So when August 2011 came around and Eli Manning was asked if he was in Tom Brady’s class, I wasn’t surprised by his answer. By that time Eli had won what we will call the First Victory—the conviction that he was good enough to play at a high level on any field against any opponent. He had been exercising his confidence muscles for over four years by then, and despite having had to learn two new offensive systems because of two head coaching changes, despite two recent losing seasons, and despite a revolving door of offensive linemen and other teammates, Eli Manning believed he was as good as any player in his position. He had won the victory in his heart and mind, which gave him the best chance to win on the field in the toughest conditions.
Football experts are still debating whether Eli Manning is indeed a Top 10, Top 5 quarterback.
Arguments about players go on endlessly. What isn’t up for debate is that Eli performed at the highest level in a very competitive profession’s most demanding and important position for many years until his retirement in 2020. He made the best of his talent and his preparation by building his confidence, protecting that confidence, and playing confidently. He became as good as he could be. The real question is about you. Are you as good at your job, your profession, your passion, as you could be? Would your life be different if you won your own First Victory and had Eli’s level of confidence (not his arm, not his football IQ, just his confidence)? I’m pretty sure your answer is yes. In the pages ahead, you will find what you’re looking for.
Introduction
What Confidence Is and Isn’t
Stoney Portis left his hometown of Niederwald, Texas (population 576), to begin his forty-seven-month West Point experience
in the summer of 2000. Upon arrival at the banks of the Hudson River he told his cadet team leader that he wanted to continue competing as a powerlifter, because he loved the simple challenge of pushing himself to discover just how much iron he could move. Stoney’s team leader sent him straightaway to my office, where, under my supervision and the direct instruction of trainer Dave Czesniuk, Stoney learned, practiced, and mastered mental skills that would enable him to step into any competitive arena and release every ounce of strength and every detail of technique that he built up through his diligent training. By the time he graduated from West Point in 2004 as captain of the West Point Powerlifting team, Stoney Portis benched 345, squatted 465, and deadlifted 505 while weighing only 148 pounds. Five years later, he called upon those same skills to succeed in lethal ground combat in Afghanistan.
Portis’s name might be familiar if you saw the intense 2020 movie The Outpost or read journalist Jake Tapper’s remarkable 2012 book of the same title, upon which the film was based. The outpost
was Combat Outpost Keating, established by the US Army in 2006 in the Nuristan Province of eastern Afghanistan as part of the US-led coalition strategy to halt the flow of insurgents and weapons over the border from neighboring Pakistan, but unfortunately it was situated deep in a valley surrounded by high mountains where it was vulnerable to enemy fire from multiple positions. Over the next three years it became known, with typical military gallows humor, as Camp Custer,
a place where a massacre could happen at any time. This was the location of then Captain Stoney Portis’s command, where Bravo troop, Third Squadron, of the US Army’s Sixty-First Cavalry Regiment was stationed on October 3, 2009.
At 0600 local time that morning, Combat Outpost Keating came under attack, but as fate would have it, Captain Portis was thirty kilometers away at Forward Operating Base Bostick, the unit’s headquarters, where he had flown two days earlier to coordinate plans to close Camp Keating. Portis got the grim news that his fifty-three soldiers at Keating were taking heavy mortar, rocket-propelled-grenade, and machine-gun fire from the Taliban. By 0830 Captain Portis and the six soldiers who had been with him at Bostick were circling above Camp Keating in a Blackhawk helicopter, preparing to land and join the fight on the ground. This was not Portis’s first combat action; in 2006 he had been in firefights north of Baghdad, and he took the same steps now that he had taken then to get control of the naturally occurring flood of negative thoughts that all soldiers experience before battle. There I was in the helicopter thinking ‘This is how I’m going to die,’
he recounted to me. "But I stopped that thought, slowed down my breathing, and repeated one of the affirmations I had been using since the day I took command—I am the leader; I make the decisions when it counts. Then I pictured exactly where we would land and exactly what each of us would do once we hit the ground. Before I knew it, I was completely relaxed and in my zone." First Victory achieved.
But as often happens, Stoney Portis’s preparation did not meet with immediate opportunity. High above Camp Keating, with his Blackhawk running low on fuel and taking enemy fire, the pilot signaled to Portis that the Taliban attackers had taken control of Camp Keating’s only landing zone, so they would have to turn around and fly the thirty kilometers back to Bostick, to both refuel and reorganize. Once again, Portis had to control the fears and worries he felt for his beleaguered soldiers who were desperately fighting for their lives that very moment. Maintaining that control was made all the more challenging once he landed at Bostick and ran to assemble a quick reaction force (QRF) of US and Afghan soldiers that he could lead back to Keating. There his fears were worsened when he passed by the pilot of an Apache attack helicopter that, like the Blackhawk Portis had just flown in, had been badly damaged by enemy fire over Camp Keating. Smoking a cigarette and shaking his head, the pilot told Portis, I don’t know how they’ll make it.
Despite the utter seriousness of the situation Captain Portis continued finding his zone for the next nine hours, winning one small First Victory at a time by affirming his conviction, slowing his breathing, and keeping his senses locked in. He helped load the QRF into Blackhawks, flew to the nearest available landing zone atop a nearby mountain, and eventually made his way to Keating with the QRF on foot via a tortuous five-hour descent covering over two thousand vertical feet of difficult, rocky terrain. Throughout that descent he fought through one ambush after another, calling in artillery and air strikes to turn back the waves of Taliban attackers. By the time he reached Camp Keating as darkness fell at roughly 1800 hours Portis had counted over one hundred enemy dead. The fifty-three soldiers of Bravo troop meanwhile, had fought with extraordinary bravery against an estimated force of three hundred Taliban and prevailed, holding Camp Keating for twelve nightmarish hours. Eight members of Bravo troop died in action that day, and twenty-two more were wounded. Two Medals of Honor, the nation’s highest award for valor in combat, eleven Silver Stars, (the third-highest award), and nineteen Purple Hearts (for combat wounded) were later awarded to Portis’s soldiers. For his own part, Stoney Portis, who told me, I’m no hero, I was just in the middle,
was awarded a Bronze Star.
Stoney Portis’s decision to find his zone
throughout that day in the worst of circumstances reveals one of the many common misunderstandings about confidence. Most people would certainly not decide to be confident and positive about their future when confronted with such a horrible situation. Most people only allow themselves to feel confident when good things are happening. Their inner state is contingent upon outside events, and thus they are trapped on a roller coaster—flying high when life is a bowl of cherries, and wallowing in the depths the rest of the time. If we are to build, maintain, and apply confidence in the real world of human performance, this common misunderstanding and several others equally ineffective must be put to rest.
Let’s face it, our society has a problematic, ambivalent relationship with confidence and confident people. Sure, we all know confidence is important, but we also know that if you come across as more than just cautiously confident, you will most likely be labeled as arrogant or conceited or both. Even quiet and professional expressions of confidence, such as Eli Manning’s 2011 assertion described in the preface, generate explosions of questioning and criticism. Confidence, it seems, has a downside—it’ll put you in an unfavorable light, either as outspokenly conceited and hence unlikable, as lazy and complacent, or (God forbid) both. As a result of this perceived downside many well-intentioned, dedicated, and motivated people decide not to do the necessary mental work (changing the way they think about themselves) that will build and protect their confidence. Better, they think, to be humble and modest, and that means not developing too high an opinion of themselves. Perhaps they remember all too well that loud and boastful person who beat them at something years ago before they developed enough knowledge or skill to be successful. They’ll be damned if they ever let themselves become that loud and boastful so-and-so.
But here’s what’s important: if you are a naturally quiet individual who grew up believing that it was important not to call attention to oneself, doing the mental work to gain confidence isn’t going to change you into a conceited braggart. For every loud and confident individual out there (and the media bombard us with generally negative coverage of loud and confident people—from boxer Cassius Clay in the early ’60s to mixed martial arts champions Conor McGregor and Ronda Rousey today)—there are just as many equally confident people who are also naturally quiet and reserved. The truth is that you can be very confident on the inside (which you have to be if you want to perform well), and very polite, respectful, and humble on the outside (which you have to be if you want to have any friends). NFL quarterback Drew Brees, who announced his retirement in March 2021, is one such person. Despite being one of the best players at his position and a former Super Bowl MVP, Brees doesn’t say much about himself. He let his play and his other good work, like winning the NFL’s Man of the Year Award in 2006 for his charitable work after Hurricane Katrina devastated New Orleans, speak for itself. I’m a very modest person,
Brees told interviewer Steve Kroft on 60 Minutes in 2010. But I’m also extremely confident. And if you put me in the situation or in the moment, I’m gonna have some swagger, I’m gonna have some cockiness, and there’s nothing I think I can’t do.
Brees clearly has both the internal, private confidence needed for success and the external, public modesty that puts people at ease.
So remember this: you can be powerfully confident without being considered conceited or arrogant. Go ahead and sound off if that’s your natural style. But if you happen to be the quiet, more introverted type, rest assured that following this book’s program and learning to win your First Victory won’t make you any less polite, respectful, and likable.
With that important point in mind, let’s continue making confidence simpler, clearer, and easier to understand. In this introduction I’ll establish a simple and functional definition of confidence, one that you can use as a guide in your pursuit of success and growth. With that definition in hand you won’t scratch your head or furrow your brow when your boss, coach, trainer, or colleague brings the topic of confidence up (in fact you’ll know more about it than he or she probably does). Further, you’ll know immediately whether you are fully confident at any given moment for any given task.
Next, I will discuss the five biggest popular misconceptions about confidence, the widely held but misleading ideas about confidence that make it hard for people to build it, keep it, and use it. Once we clear the air on all this, the truth about confidence, the truth about achieving your own First Victory, will emerge. Once that happens you’ll know when you have it, and even better, when you know you don’t have it, you’ll know how to get it.
So let’s define confidence in a useful, practical way.
Ask a dozen people to state their definition of confidence and you’ll get a dozen quick and simple answers. Believing in yourself
and Knowing you can do something
are two that I’ve heard hundreds of times over the years. But these and the others like them that I’ve heard aren’t all that helpful. Just what does it mean to believe in yourself
? What are the components, the processes, the mechanics behind believing in yourself
? Unless you care to study philosophy for a long, long time, that definition won’t be of much use to you. Neither will be the definitions found in most dictionaries. Here are a couple typical ones: Merriam-Webster (America’s most trusted online dictionary
) defines confidence as a feeling or consciousness of one’s powers or of reliance on one’s circumstances.
Cambridge Dictionary offers up this one: a feeling of having little doubt about yourself and your abilities.
While neither of these definitions are wrong, neither of them, and none of the others I’ve come across, are particularly useful to a performer because they all neglect one crucial point about human performance. And that point is this: human beings are hardwired to execute any well-learned skill—be it a tennis backhand, a violin solo, the solving of an algebra problem, or the cross-examination of a witness—unconsciously. No matter how complex the skill may be (and indeed the more complex the skill, the more important this is), the execution of that skill proceeds more smoothly and more effectively when analysis, judgment, and all other forms of conscious, deliberate thought are momentarily suspended. You can have all the consciousness of your power
you want, but if you’re still analyzing your every step, judging your every move, and talking to yourself about how you’re doing what you’re doing, you’ll always compromise your real ability. All those conscious, deliberate thoughts take up a sizable portion of your nervous system’s capacity to take in task-relevant information, process it quickly (as in instantly), and send the correct response instructions back out to your hands and your feet (if you need to move), or your throat and tongue (if you need to speak). When we focus too hard on all the little details of that skill,
says Sian Beilock, a psychology professor at the University of Chicago for twelve years and now Barnard College president, we actually disrupt our performance. If we were shuffling quickly down a flight of stairs and I asked you to think about exactly what both your knees were doing as you were moving, there’s a good chance you’d end up in a pile at the bottom of the stairs.
Real confidence, then, the kind you’ll need to be at your best when the heat’s on and the consequences matter, is the absence of all that mental chatter and discursive analytical thought.
So my operating definition of confidence (one that will actually help you perform well), is this: a sense of certainty about your ability, which allows you to bypass conscious thought and execute unconsciously.
Break it down with me:
a sense of certainty—that feeling of having complete faith . . .
about your ability—that you can do something or that you know something . . .
which allows you to bypass conscious thought—so well you don’t have to think about it . . .
and execute unconsciously—so you perform it automatically and instinctively.
Confidence is that feeling that you can do something (or that you know something) so well you don’t have to think about how to do it when you’re doing it. That skill or knowledge is in you, it’s part of you, and it will come out when needed if you let it.
Allow this definition to sink in by considering the various complicated things you do right now without having to think about them. Tying your shoes is one such activity—ten fingers are engaged in a complex series of delicate movements and adjustments; tension is applied or slackened at progressive intervals; and the proper length of untied lace remains at the end. All this is done without conscious deliberation or analysis. You perform this skill (if you’re old enough to be reading this book) with absolute confidence. Consider brushing your teeth—the precise angle of the bristles, the proper amount of pressure per stroke, and the sufficient number of strokes per tooth. All these technical aspects of proper tooth-brushing are executed unconsciously, you do them all without thinking, you do them all with complete confidence. Now consider how useful and helpful this same level of unconscious certainty would be when stepping up to receive a tennis serve against a good opponent, or when playing the most complicated part of the piano recital in front of your teacher and best friends, or when sitting down to negotiate with a hard-bargaining customer. For the cadets and soldiers I teach at West Point, this level of unconscious certainty is an absolute necessity before stepping into hostile territory. Getting to that certainty is what Sun Tzu meant by the phrase the First Victory.
A brief aside here . . . some readers may wonder if they are indeed good enough,
(that is, skilled enough, or smart enough, or prepared enough), to reach that level of certainty. If you’re wondering that, please understand this: success in any field—be it sports, the arts, business, science, and certainly the military—requires both confidence AND competence. A supremely confident individual who lacks the required skills will only be partially successful. The college student who has studied only half the material for the final exam and is utterly certain and comfortable in what she knows will probably not ace the exam; she’ll do well on the material she did study (because she’s confident about it) but lose points on the rest of the exam. Similarly, the football player who neglected his off-season conditioning program will be at a disadvantage once team practices start, no matter how confident he is.
However, the person who has studied all the material to the point of actually knowing it but still, despite all that study, worries that he’s missed something and doubts his preparation, will also never ace the exam, because his constant stream of negative mental chatter will prevent his recall of the facts and the details. In like manner the player who has diligently followed the conditioning program to the letter but still holds on to self-doubt lowers his chances of making the team. It’s the person who has done enough preparation, who has developed enough competence, and who then decides to feel totally certain about that level of competence, whatever that level may be, who has the best chance of bringing home that A grade or making the team. So how do you know if you’ve done enough? Simple: if you can perform the sport skills consistently in practice, or play the tough part of the piano recital alone in your home, or answer all the practice test problems when you’re with your study group, then you’ve probably done enough. But very importantly, no matter how much or how little preparation you have done, no matter how much competence you actually have, your performance when it matters will always depend on whether you feel totally certain in whatever level of competence you have achieved. If you truly want to give yourself the best chance of success, then having that unconscious certainty will always be your best choice.
So how can we ensure that we feel certain about our competence? Where does that all-important sense of certainty come from?
The answers to these important questions require a little digging, and the best place to begin that excavation is with some of the common misconceptions about confidence, the ideas and partial truths that influence popular thinking but aren’t truly accurate and definitely not helpful. This exploration will bring us to a useful truth about confidence that will help us build it, protect it, and apply it at the right moments.
Misconception #1: Confidence Is a Fixed, Inherited Trait. You Were Born with a Certain Amount of It and There’s Not Much You Can Do Beyond That.
This is an unfortunate but popular misunderstanding. I have met too many people who have given into the belief that their confidence is fixed, so no amount of training or practice or experience will affect it. This is, quite obviously, a self-defeating conviction. If you’re convinced that nothing can be done to change your confidence, then you won’t bother trying and you’ll remain right where you are.
The truth of the matter, however, is quite different and a lot more helpful. The high level of confidence seen in outstanding athletes and other performers is not some genetic accident over which they have no control. Instead, confidence is learned. It is the result of a consistently constructive thinking process that allows performers to do two things: (1) retain and benefit from their successful experiences, and (2) release or restructure their less successful experiences. Believing that confidence (or the lack of it) is an inherited gift gives people an easy and convenient excuse for not putting in the time, energy, and effort to improve their thinking process.
The story of American Olympic bobsledder Jill Bakken is an excellent example of how an individual develops confidence through deliberate effort (while also, by the way, remaining respectful and modest amid success at the world-class level of competition). Standing an unimpressive five foot five inches and weighing maybe 130 pounds, with a shy smile and quiet demeanor, she may not immediately come across as a superconfident performer. Having been completely overshadowed during the 2001 Bobsled World Cup season and right up to the 2002 Olympic Trials by the other American bobsled driver, Jean Racine, Jill had very few logical