The Neighbour Upstairs: An unputdownable psychological thriller with a twist
3/5
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About this ebook
The break-up of Olivia’s marriage is hard on all involved, but especially her nine-year-old daughter, Ellie. They attempt to build a new life, and focus on the future. But Olivia is crushingly lonely, so when her new neighbour, Michael, extends the hand of friendship, it’s all she can do to stop herself clutching at it and never letting go.
Olivia has no idea how the course of her life will be altered by that choice.
Before long, Michael and Oliva are a couple. There are some difficulties making it work – after all, both parties have emotional baggage. Doesn’t everyone keep some secrets? If only Ellie could adjust, and Michael’s erratic sister, Chloe, didn’t keep bringing drama to their door.
But Olivia doesn’t listen to the warning signs before it’s far, far too late. By the time she realises something is badly wrong with the man she’s involved with, she cannot escape. The only way out is for the truth to explode like a bomb, shattering their lives, and ensuring no one caught in the middle will ever be the same again…
A compelling psychological thriller with an unforgettable ending from #1 bestseller Kathryn Croft. Perfect for readers who love Samantha Hayes, Alison James and S. E. Lynes.
*** Previously published under the title Behind Closed Doors. ***
Praise for The Neighbour Upstairs‘Twisty, shocking and deliciously dark! The writing is superb, a real treat to read. Definitely one of the best books I have read this year.’ ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Reader Review
‘An excellent psychological thriller. I loved the dark foreboding atmosphere and the ongoing mystery… It’s extremely suspenseful and full of drama with an explosive climax.’ ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Reader Review
‘This book has all the excitement you could possibly want. Unputdownable!’ ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Reader Review
‘Kathryn Croft is brilliant! I totally loved this dark edgy thriller. This one hooked me right away and just never let go. Highly recommend.’ ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Reader Review
‘I’m hooked on Kathryn Croft. Once I start one of her books I can’t put it down. I was so shocked and speechless at that ending. I would definitely recommend it.’ ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Reader Review
‘This is a really good book… I really recommend it to anyone who loves solid mystery and thrillers!’ ⭐⭐⭐⭐⭐ Reader Review
Kathryn Croft
Kathryn Croft is the bestselling author of seven psychological thrillers and to date she has sold over one million copies of her books. Her third book, The Girl With No Past spent over four weeks at number one in the Amazon UK chart, and she has also appeared on the Wall Street Journal's bestsellers list. With publishing deals in fifteen different countries, Kathryn has just finished writing her eighth and ninth novels and is now working on book ten. After twelve years living in London, she now lives in Guildford, Surrey, the place she grew up, with her husband and two children.
Read more from Kathryn Croft
The Other Husband: A gripping psychological thriller Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Mother's Secret: An absolutely gripping psychological thriller Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5The Lying Wife: An absolutely gripping psychological thriller Rating: 4 out of 5 stars4/5
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The Neighbour Upstairs - Kathryn Croft
For Paul
Chapter One
I have never told you about the day I left Carl. For eleven years we’d woken up together, made a life for ourselves and raised our daughter, only for it to perish in an instant, as if the foundation of our marriage was built on air. How foolish I was to believe that was the worst life could throw at me.
It is the beginning of autumn when I leave the only home I’ve ever felt secure in. The sun teases us with its excessive heat, fooling us into believing we’re still in the caress of summer, so it is a surprise when Carl trudges downstairs wrapped in a thick, black roll-neck jumper. My mouth opens to ask him why he’s wearing winter clothes on such a warm day but I quickly change my mind. It’s no longer my business what he does.
Carl begs me to stay that morning, hurling his words at me as if they are weapons. How can you do this to Ellie?
he shouts in desperation. And why Putney? You don’t have to run away to the other side of London, for Christ’s sake. I’ll never see her!
I avoid looking at him and shrug off the fact he’s using our daughter as a bargaining tool. Running on adrenalin and fear of caving in, I throw items I’m not sure belong to me into boxes, paying no attention to the room labels I have scribbled on each one. I don’t want to think about how I’ll unpack this mess. All I can focus on is getting out of here before I have second thoughts.
Carl continues with his desperate plea and in my rush I drop the wine glass I’m haphazardly blanketing in bubble wrap. The tiny fragments of glass glisten on the floor and I stare at them, wondering how something that’s shattered into pieces can still be so beautiful. I clear the pieces away and my resolve to leave the home I’ve pictured us growing old in together strengthens. Just like the glass, our marriage cannot be put back together.
Ellie appears in the kitchen doorway. Her eyes are bloodshot and her cheeks coated with tears. Carl finally gives up his plea and rushes to comfort her while I finish packing. I cannot look at either of them and trudge back and forth to the car, weighed down by boxes that are ready to burst.
When he’s managed to calm Ellie down, Carl helps me with the last box and when I shut the car boot I’m surprised by how little there seems to be. Most of it is clothing; I have left all the household items for Carl because I don’t want reminders of my old life. This is a fresh start for Ellie and me.
Outside the front door, I say goodbye to Carl and try not to crumble when I have to pull Ellie off him. She clings to his waist and howls while Carl looks at me, helpless, his eyes begging me to change my mind. Come on, Ellie,
I say, gently easing her off Carl and towards the car. We’ll call Daddy as soon as we get there, I promise.
And then Ellie surprises us both. Wiping her eyes with her sleeve, she stops crying and nods. Okay. Bye, Daddy,
she says, handing Carl a folded piece of paper. It must have been clamped in her hand this whole time because I’ve put all her bags in the car and she’s wearing a dress with no pockets. Before Carl unfolds the sheet I know what it is. Even at nine years old Ellie is a gifted artist, surprising her teachers and us with her accuracy and eye for detail. Carl opens the sheet and I can tell he’s fighting back tears. Ellie has drawn a caricature of the three of us; we’re all holding hands and smiling, standing in front of the house. Carl grabs Ellie and hugs her tightly. I love you,
he says.
He is still standing at the door as we drive away and with Ellie’s small face plastered to the car window, watching Carl as if he’ll disappear forever if she dares to turn away, I nearly change my mind.
For the whole drive to Putney, I constantly check beside me to see if Ellie is okay. She doesn’t say anything but snuggles into the passenger seat and closes her eyes. I am powerless to help her. Nothing will ease the pain of me dragging her away from her father and I begin to wonder if either of us will ever be okay again.
As we pull up to the Victorian terrace on Woodborough Road, my mind is numb, my body going through cold, robotic motions over which I have no control. It feels like another world here, a million miles away from the familiarity of Winchmore Hill. Even the houses seem strange, each one blending into its neighbour with barely a distinguishing feature, and I wonder if this can ever become home for us. Shaking off these thoughts, I remind myself why I’m doing this and why there is no way back and as I help Ellie out of the car, her face puffed up from crying, the only thing that matters is that I get my daughter through this.
I hand Ellie her purple rucksack. I’ve packed some paper and colouring pencils in there,
I tell her. So as soon as we get in you can do some drawing while I unpack.
She nods and her face brightens a fraction but she doesn’t speak.
We arrive later than I’d arranged and the estate agent is already waiting for us by the front door. She is not the woman Ellie and I met the first time we looked at the flat and I am disappointed. It would have been nice to see someone familiar. She paces up and down the narrow garden path, a brown, misshapen envelope dangling from her fingertips. I stare at her wispy hair and deeply lined face; she can’t be more than thirty yet she looks as if she’s been crumpled like scrap paper.
Welcome to your new home!
she says, handing me the envelope. Here are your keys. I’m late for an appointment so have to rush off now but please call the office if you need anything else.
She glances up at the top windows of the house. I’ve just met your upstairs neighbour and he said if you need any help with anything or have any questions about the property you can just ask him. He seems nice. You’ll have no problems with noise or any kind of disturbance.
I stare at the upstairs windows and hope this is true. Carl and I have never had trouble with either of our neighbours so it never occurred to me to check who Ellie and I will be sharing a property with. I turn back to the estate agent but she is already rushing off to her car, leaving Ellie and me alone.
Inside the communal hallway, which is now filled with our belongings, Ellie paces back and forth, in desperate need of the bathroom. I am amused by her bouncing around while I struggle to find the keys I’ve only just been handed but I don’t say a word. I know she won’t find anything funny at the moment.
At last!
she cries, shoving her rucksack into my hand and barging past me as I finally get the front door open. Her footsteps pound on the floor before she throws doors open, trying to remember which one leads to the bathroom. With all the commotion, I don’t hear the door next to ours open.
Need some help?
I spin around and you are standing before me. Your voice is deep and formal, completely at odds with the fraying jeans and scuffed trainers you are wearing. You look around my age but your voice belongs to someone much older. I can’t form a concrete impression of you; you are just there. But whoever you are, I’m grateful for your offer of help.
As unsociable as I’m feeling, I make an effort at conversation as we lug boxes and suitcases from the hallway. I prepare myself to be asked whether I’m moving in alone, but thankfully you steer clear of personal questions and instead fill me in on the local shops.
Thanks so much for this,
I say as you bring in the last box. You have piled them all neatly against the wall so they are barely in the way. All the room labels face outwards so if I’d only put things in the correct boxes unpacking would be a simple task. You have even sorted out all the boxes I’ve brought in because I certainly haven’t arranged them with such care.
I’d offer you a cup of tea but—
That’s okay. I’m off out now.
You hold out your hand. I’m Michael, by the way.
Olivia.
Your hand feels warm and too soft. It is alien to me because it’s the complete contrast of Carl’s rough, calloused skin.
Ellie appears in the lounge, wiping her hands on her dress. There are no towels,
she says when she spots my frown.
This is my daughter, Ellie,
I say, beckoning her forward.
Ellie can’t have noticed you because she halts in surprise and stares shyly at the floor when she realises we have company.
This is our new neighbour, Michael,
I tell her and she finally looks up, holding out her hand to you. And at that moment I burst with pride for her. You lean down to shake her hand and within a few minutes Ellie is showing you her sketches and you carefully look them over, asking questions about each one. I wait for you to glance at me and reveal you’re just humouring her but you are so engrossed in her drawings you don’t look anywhere else until you’ve seen them all. You only stay for a few more minutes but in that time I almost forget how Ellie and I have ended up here.
When you’ve gone, Ellie and I explore the flat. It’s small but cosy and clean and most of the furniture looks brand new. The landlord has left a bottle of champagne on the kitchen table and Ellie scrunches up her face. Yuk!
she says, and I promise to get her some coke.
The two bedrooms are the same size so I let Ellie choose which one she wants. For the first time since we’ve left the house she seems distracted from her sadness and I unpack all her toys and books while she sits on the bed, drawing a colony of penguins. I’m not worried about unpacking my own things, I just want Ellie to feel at home. Even though she seems better for now, I know she feels the gaping hole of Carl’s absence and anything I say or do will only offer temporary relief.
I remind her she’ll see Carl at the weekend and she asks where I think he’ll take her. I wonder if it’s a testament to the trust Ellie has in me that she has never questioned my decision to leave. Would I feel better or worse if she had? Perhaps I wouldn’t have been able to do it at all if she had protested. Carl and I broke the news to her months ago so maybe us all still living together for a while softened the blow. But whatever the case, Ellie is strong. Stronger than I could ever have been at her age. When Ellie’s room is finally unpacked and it looks as if she has lived here forever, I am choked by the panic I’ve managed to keep at bay until now.
I’m hungry,
Ellie says and I remember we haven’t eaten since breakfast. I have no idea what the time is but it’s dark outside so it must be after seven o’clock. There is no food in the flat so I tell Ellie I’ll treat her to a McDonald’s. It’s not the dinner I wanted us to have on our first night in our new home but I don’t have the energy for food shopping or cooking now.
We’ll have to walk to the high street, though,
I warn her, but she is already pulling on her jacket.
After we have eaten, without anything to distract her, Ellie becomes subdued again as we walk home. She fixes her eyes on the pavement and isn’t interested in any of the shops or scenery we pass. Normally she would be on the lookout for something to draw but tonight her sketches seem to be the furthest thing from her mind. My attempts at jubilant conversation only manage to extract grunts and mumbles from her so I give up and hold her hand tighter instead, trying to ignore the fact that my mouth is burning from the hot apple pie I’ve eaten.
We turn onto Woodborough Road and I begin to feel certain we will never feel at home here. How can we without Carl? We’re not a family anymore; I don’t know what we are now. Something split open and torn apart. Something that can never be whole. I’ve had to drag my body across London but anything I consist of other than skin and bone has been left behind in those four walls that now allow Carl more space than he’ll ever need. But at least I made the choice to do this. Ellie did not.
Approaching the house, I look up to see if your lights are on. I’m not sure why; maybe it’s just the comfort of knowing someone else is in the building. But there are no signs of life emanating from your flat and a flutter of disappointment stirs within me.
I give it no more thought as I put Ellie to bed and spend the rest of the evening cleaning and unpacking. But no matter how much I polish and scrub, something feels wrong. This is not our home.
Hours later when I finally sink into bed, tears dampen my pillow as I spend the rest of the night watching the glowing blue numbers on my clock flick towards dawn. When it gets to five o’clock, I can’t bear lying here anymore, unable to sleep but in no state to do anything constructive either, so I cross the hall to Ellie’s room. She has left her door wide open – something I have never known her to do – and her small reading light glows in the corner of the room. Concerned, I step over to the bed and study her face; it is crumpled and her legs are pulled up to her chin but she is lost to sleep. As I watch her, I picture scooping her up, running to the car and driving back to Winchmore Hill. It would be so easy, I wouldn’t even care about the things we’d leave behind, as long as Ellie and I are back home. But then I picture Carl waiting for us at the door, pleasure on his face and his arms stretched out to welcome us back. And I remember. And then I know that we can never go back. No matter how hard it is to be here, this is where we must stay. It’s just the two of us now.
Chapter Two
During those first few weeks without Carl, keeping busy is the only thing that holds me together. It is easy at first because there is so much to do in the flat but eventually everything is unpacked, new furniture and accessories bought and arranged and all that’s left is for Ellie and me to enjoy our new home. But neither of us can, even though on the surface we both try to be strong for each other, constantly persuading the other we are okay.
Although I love being at home with Ellie, I begin to look forward to her starting school again because at least then she will be busy with homework and new friends. I itch to get back to work, to distract myself from failure. I may not be able to keep my marriage together but at least work is somewhere I can succeed. I’ve always loved my job but now it is more important than ever. Writing reviews for an online magazine might not be the most exciting career choice, or the best-paid, but there is nothing else for me. Along with being a mother, it is who I am. Most of all, my work allows me freedom to spend time with Ellie and to express myself with words.
After three weeks off work, the day finally arrives when I am due back. It’s also Ellie’s first day at her new school and because it’s only a short distance from our flat, we walk there. I try to convince her she’ll be okay and even though she nods I can see she is lost in her thoughts. At the school gates she hugs me goodbye and trots off without any complaint. I stare after her, marvelling at her strength and I stay rooted to the spot long after the other mothers have disappeared, full of guilt and wishing Carl was here too.
With spending too long at the school and the new journey to work, I am over an hour late by the time I arrive at the tiny building in Waterloo that masquerades as an office. It is clamped between a dry cleaner’s and a florist’s shop and with no sign alerting people to its whereabouts, it’s easy to miss. The building is run down and cramped but it is a retreat for me because apart from Ellie, it is the only stable thing I now have.
Nothing has changed since I’ve been absent and I’m grateful for this. My desk is exactly as I left it except now it is coated in a thick layer of dust.
I told the cleaners to leave it alone,
Leon says, rushing over to me. I didn’t want them to disturb anything important.
I am touched by this and I stand before Leon, wondering whether to hug him. He might be my boss but he’s been my friend for even longer. Perhaps he is thinking the same thing because he shifts forward awkwardly, unsure what to do with his arms. He looks around and sees Myrah and Sophie watching us so whatever he was planning, I only get a pat on the arm. So glad you’re back, Olivia. It’s been… quiet without you. Just get settled and we’ll talk later, okay?
Thanking him, I sink into my chair. I watch him head back to his desk, his huge bear-like frame incongruous in this tiny office space. His work area is not far from mine, even though he could easily use the separate room by the kitchen, which is now a store room for junk. I wonder how many other bosses would choose to share cramped office space with their employees. Sophie and Myrah might have suspicions about why Leon sits with us but I know it’s not to check up on us. That’s not his nature. If he thought he couldn’t trust any of us we wouldn’t be working here in the first place.
Behind me, Sophie and Myrah are now engrossed in their computers; I’m sure they’re trying to be tactful by not staring at me and I’m grateful for that. I haven’t told them about separating from Carl but Leon will have told them why I’ve had three weeks off work. I’m glad they know. Now neither of them will bring up Carl’s name.
Myrah brings me a mug of tea I haven’t asked for and squeezes my arm but all I can manage in response is a weak smile. It’s hard to define our relationship but we sit on the borderline between colleagues and friends. It is Myrah’s openness that’s brought us closer together. The way she talks about her family makes me feel as if I know them personally and every morning I look forward to hearing the Collins family news. In return I tell her snippets about my life. Or at least I did until now. I was never able to slot the words in between Myrah gushing about what a great husband David is.
Sophie doesn’t say anything but drops her eyes whenever I turn my head to look at her. I’m surprised by this; she is divorced herself so is the one person in the office who should know how I’m feeling. I’ve never been her favourite person – most of the time my requests for administrative help are greeted by scowls and grumbles – but now I long for her to reach out to me, offer me some words of comfort. Anything to show me I’ll be okay. But maybe the permanent frown on her face and snide tone of voice when she talks about other people to Myrah are a glimpse of my future. The bitter woman I will become. Sophie can’t be far into her forties but she has already given up on herself, wearing clothes way beyond her years and scrunching her hair up into a permanent and messy bun at the back of her head. She has written herself off and maybe I will be powerless to prevent myself doing the same.
It takes me all morning to wade through three weeks’ worth of emails and by the time I’ve finished I’m exhausted, even though I haven’t moved from my desk. I must have read thousands of words but now I’ve closed my inbox I can’t remember a single one. I thought work would be a distraction but everything is still overshadowed by emptiness. Nothing is the same; even being somewhere unrelated to Carl.
I can’t do this,
I say to Leon when I find him in the kitchen. I’m not ready.
Nonsense,
he says, spooning coffee into his mug. He pulls another one from the cupboard but I shake my head and rush from the kitchen. Ignoring the surprise on Myrah and Sophie’s faces as I fling the office door open and escape outside, I take a deep lungful of thick smoggy air and try to control my breathing.
All around me people rush by, their strides purposeful and determined. I am invisible here. Part of the scenery nobody bothers to notice. But quickly the urge to escape the office – and probably my whole life – passes and I begin to feel foolish. I have been back at work for half a day and I can’t even hack that. At least it will give Sophie something to gossip about.
Just as I am wondering what to do now I’ve made such a show of myself, Leon appears beside me and grabs my arm. Come on. I think you need some lunch.
He leads me past the cafe we all regularly crowd into for sandwiches and around the corner to a pub I’ve never been to before. Just in case Sophie decides to go for a walk,
he explains.
Inside, Leon ushers me to a booth in the corner and heads to the bar to order us food. He hasn’t asked what I’d like and I feel like a helpless baby, needing to be looked after and incapable of making the smallest of decisions.
Even though the pub is fairly quiet for lunchtime, Leon is kept waiting so long that I have time to try and pull myself together. I haven’t acted professionally today and even though I’ve known Leon since our university days he is my boss now and has to put his business before anything else. Even friendship. Showing any sign of favouritism towards me when he has two other employees to consider won’t sit comfortably with him so he will have to tread carefully. Perhaps he will fire me and is still at the bar because he’s finding the right words to tell me I’m out of a job. But even the thought of losing my job is nothing compared to what I have already lost.
Leon eventually joins me at the table with our drinks and places a glass of coke in front of me. Three ice cubes float around the top but there is no slice of lemon. How did you know?
I ask.
He chuckles. Olivia, you’ve been ordering the same drink every day at lunch time for four years. I’ve also ordered you a ham and cheese baguette, no tomato. That’s right, isn’t it?
And now it is my turn to laugh. Thanks. But when did I get so predictable?
Not predictable. You just know what you want. There’s nothing wrong with that.
He takes a sip of his drink and I stare out of the window, feeling far removed from someone who knows what she wants.
I apologise to Leon. There is little I can say to explain my behaviour so I hope it will be enough. His huge face beams at me from behind his glass. Don’t apologise. For anything. I’m just worried about you.
I should have known Leon would react with kindness and I dig deep to find something else to offer him. Maybe I just haven’t given myself enough time? This morning I thought I was okay but—
Leon slams his glass down. Work is the best thing for you. What else will you do except sit and stew at home?
His voice is stern but somehow still kind so I don’t object. Leon has that way about him. He doesn’t manipulate people but I am willing to bet he can get almost anyone to do anything he wants. We agree that I’ll take the rest of the day off and come back tomorrow. I rattle the ice cubes in my drink and try not to dwell on how I’ll get through tomorrow.
Leon’s mobile phone rings and he smiles an apology before bellowing a greeting into it. I can tell it’s a business call because he fishes out a notebook from his pocket and starts scribbling something illegible to anyone but him. I watch him talk and wonder how a man like Leon is still single. Although he is a huge man, he’s not obese and his face is warm and kind. He’s had several girlfriends since I’ve known him but I’ve never heard him rave about any of them. I’ve questioned him about this several times over the years – usually after a dose of alcohol – but Leon remains cagey about his personal life, brushing it off by saying his standards are probably far too high.
Our food still hasn’t arrived by the time Leon finishes his call and he checks his watch and looks around the pub. It’s okay,
I tell him. You don’t have to stay here with me. I know you’ve got a million things to do.
Leon’s expression falls, as if I have offended him. Surely he should realise nothing I say or do at the moment should be taken seriously? No, I’m just starving,
he says. I don’t need to rush back yet. Besides, I’m worried about you. I don’t want you to be on your own at the moment.
I reach for his hand and his cheeks flush red. I have Ellie, don’t I? Besides, you don’t have to protect me, Leon. I’ll be fine. I’ll get through this.
I’m sure I don’t sound convincing, but then, how can I be when I don’t believe my own words?
Just don’t forget to be kind to yourself,
Leon says, squeezing my hand. You’re allowed to be upset… cry, shout, scream, whatever it takes. Just don’t beat yourself up for not feeling like you anymore.
He pulls his hand away and his face crumples into a grimace. Bloody hell, just listen to me. I sound like a second-rate psychiatrist or something. Just ignore me, eh? What the hell do I know anyway? I’ve never even come close to getting married.
The food arrives, saving us both from an awkward conversation, and Leon devours his sandwich while I only take a few bites of mine. My attempts are futile; it will only be a matter of time before Leon questions me and I am once again made to feel like a baby.
Leon’s phone rings again and this time it’s Sophie. I can hear her on the other end asking where he is and reminding him he’s got a meeting in ten minutes. For the first time since I’ve known her I notice her voice is loud and confident, completely at odds with her appearance. She sounds more like Leon’s wife than his secretary and I wonder if they’ve ever slept together. Perhaps it is even more than that and they’re having a relationship. I’d like to think Leon would be able to tell me if this is so, even if he knows Sophie and I aren’t the closest of work colleagues.
I have to get back,
he says, standing up and slipping his phone into his pocket. That was Sophie reminding me I have a meeting now. Sorry, Olivia. But I’ll see you tomorrow? Unless… Oh, never mind.
I’m too exhausted by the effort of dragging myself up from my seat to ask Leon what he was about to say. I’ll be there. Ready for work, I promise. And there’s a film preview tomorrow afternoon so I’ll get stuck into that.
Only if you’re sure you’re ready,
Leon says, and although I nod enthusiastically, I know what it will take to sit through a film, making notes to put together into something people will want to read, while everything else in my life is unrecognisable. It’s hard to believe it was only this morning I was excited about getting stuck back into work. And that for three weeks I’ve longed to be writing again. But now even that is crumbling away, despite what I’m fooling Leon into believing.
Leon insists on walking me to the station even though he is already running late. Sophie will tell you off,
I say, looking for any sign on his face that they are more than just colleagues. But Leon rolls his eyes so I don’t push it further. It starts to dawn on me that in less than a minute I will be alone again, heading back to an empty afternoon until it’s time to pick Ellie up. And even when she’s back at home with me the flat will be too quiet and we