Unlucky Thirteen: Confessions of a Nerdy Girl Diaries, #2
By Linda Rey
()
About this ebook
New school… New problems… New diary.
As if starting a new middle school isn't bad enough; now, I'm pretty sure my adoptive mom wants to send me back to the orphanage, my evil adoptive sister is trying to ruin my life, and the entire eighth grade thinks I'm a total dork because of an unfortunate beach experience involving a poisonous jellyfish. (OK, it was only a waterlogged plastic baggie that I mistook for a jellyfish, but still.)
All of that, and more, recorded on the pages of this diary, and dedicated to "M"— the mother who gave me away.
Dear M ...
Begin the entries in the diary of chronic outsider Willa Shisbey. From her constant humiliations at middle school, to the challenges of puberty, Willa shares her deepest secrets in a diary dedicated to the mother who gave her up for adoption.
Both humorous and heartfelt, Unlucky Thirteen, the second book in the Confessions of a Nerdy Girl diary series, will appeal to fans of Terri Libenson, Raina Telgemeier, and Jennifer L. Holm.
Linda Rey
Linda Rey was born with the voice of an angel and a brain so amazing she’ll probably donate it to science. When she’s not busy fa la la-ing from the hilltops or doing fantastical brain stuff in laboratories, Linda can be found at her computer creating stories for children and young adults. To see all of Linda’s titles visit her website at www.LindaReyBooks.com and www.NerdyGirlBooks.com
Read more from Linda Rey
Top Secret: Confessions of a Nerdy Girl Diaries, #1 Rating: 5 out of 5 stars5/5
Related to Unlucky Thirteen
Titles in the series (4)
Unlucky Thirteen: Confessions of a Nerdy Girl Diaries, #2 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsLetters From Summer Camp: Confessions of a Nerdy Girl Diaries, #3 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsLetter to Santa, The Easter Bunny, and Other Lame Stuff: Confessions of a Nerdy Girl Diaries, #4 Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratingsTruth or Dare: Confessions of a Nerdy Girl Diaries Rating: 0 out of 5 stars0 ratings
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Unlucky Thirteen - Linda Rey
CONTENTS
June 15, 7:15 P.M.
June 21, 10:10 P.M.
June 24, 9:32 A.M.
July 1, 10:05 P.M.
July 2, 9:45 P.M.
September 3, 9:29 P.M.
September 21, 6:17 P.M.
October 15, 8:08 P.M.
October 19, 8:59 P.M.
October 23, 10:48 P.M.
October 26, 7:07 P.M.
November 4, 4:15 P.M.
November 9, 7:01 P.M.
November 17, 6:26 P.M.
November 19, 8:10 P.M.
November 21, 9:03 P.M.
December 1, 11:19 P.M.
January 7, 9:20 P.M.
February 10, 7:13 P.M.
April 4, 6:19 P.M.
April 8, 7:46 A.M.
April 10, 3:59 P.M.
April 20, 8:25 P.M.
May 2, 3:59 P.M.
May 2, 4:42 P.M.
May 12, 6:06 P.M.
May 15, 4:44 P.M.
SPECIAL THANKS
SAMPLE CHAPTER
BOOKS BY LINDA REY
ABOUT THE AUTHOR
June 15, 7:15 P.M.
Dear M,
Have you ever had a question or a thought get stuck in your brain?
I mean seriously stuck, like, peanut butter on the roof of your mouth — stuck. Or gum on the bottom of your shoe — stuck. Or that gosh-awful, please-make-it-stop, ‘Baby Shark’ song that infiltrates every one of the 86 billion nerve cells in your brain until you want to tear the ears off your head to make it stop — stuck.
Well, I’ve had a question that’s decided to camp out in my brain for a while now, so I’m just going to bite the bullet,
as my dad says, and ask—
Did you give me away when I was a baby because I was ugly, or was it because having a kid wasn’t as fun as you thought it would be? Olivia, my adoptive sister, thinks you gave me away because of how hideous I was, but I don’t know if I believe that. I’ve seen plenty of ugly babies out in public with their moms, and the moms seem to go all gaga crazy over them as if they were the cutest kids on the entire planet.
Screen%20Shot%202019-09-01%20at%206.14.36%20PM.pngI think whoever said, love is blind,
was on to something. I have a feeling that if you love someone, or some THING, like your dog or cat or pet tarantula or whatever your deal is, that even if they aren’t cute by today’s standards,
it’s more about the FEELINGS you have for them than what they look like. (Because, let’s get real, if you’re going on looks alone, how can ANYONE love snakes and spiders??)
If you gave me away because of how I looked, was it because you couldn’t afford to fix my cleft lip? (I apologize if talking about money crosses a boundary.
My dad — yes, I know, TECHNICALLY, he’s my adoptive dad,
but he sure feels REAL to me — says that it’s rude to discuss money, religion, or politics with someone unless you know them really well, and even then, it’s dicey.) I don’t know how much the operation costs to correct a cleft lip or palate, but I bet it costs a lot!
The surgery is called a CHEILOPLASTY, and, according to my dad, it’s pretty common. (My dad assisted with my surgery, before he was my dad, back when he was just Dr. Ted,
the dentist who came to our orphanage every few months to check our teeth.)
Not to gross you out or anything, but here’s how they do the surgery: First, the surgical team makes an incision on each side of the split
on the lips or the cleft, as it’s called, to create two flaps. Next, they pull the sides together, sew the cleft shut, and voilà—no more cleft! It leaves a scar, but mine isn’t as bad now as it was a few years ago, and my dad says it will continue to fade as I get older.
My dad also says I can thank the state of Illinois for my surgery because it was done while I still lived at the orphanage, so I didn’t get a bill or anything, in case you were wondering. And I gotta say, now that I’m older, I really appreciate what a gift
the surgery was in helping to improve my looks. Not that I’m some totally hot babe, but I look waaayyyy better. (I’m even tempted to send the governor of Illinois a long overdue thank you card! Would that be weird?)
According to Olivia, on a scale of 1 to 10, I’m like a 2.5 or 2.75, max. Personally, I think I’m at least a 3 if I factor in my quick wit and the large diameter sizes of my bubble gum bubbles. (That has to account for something, right?)
Oh! Gotta go! It’s father/daughter night, and my dad is taking me out for ice cream! I love me some Rocky Road!!!!!
Screen%20Shot%202019-09-01%20at%206.30.12%20PM.png Screen%20Shot%202019-09-01%20at%206.30.12%20PM.png Screen%20Shot%202019-09-01%20at%206.30.12%20PM.png Screen%20Shot%202019-09-01%20at%206.30.12%20PM.png
Until next time,
Willa
June 21, 10:10 P.M.
Dear M,
I think I need to explain to you the family dynamics
of my adoptive family, the Shisbeys. (And I promise, this is not meant to make you feel bad about deserting … abandoning … I mean, leaving me one year and one day after my birth.)
First, there’s my dad, Theodore, but everyone calls him Ted. He’s super easygoing, and I know he loves me a lot.
../Desktop/Screen%20Shot%202019-09-24%20at%2011.42.41%20AM.pngThen there’s Diane, my adoptive mom, who I have to call Mom
to her face (some unwritten adoption rule,
I think), but who will never be more to me than the woman who is married to my dad, for reasons I’ll explain in a bit. Unlike my dad, who hugs me and shows affection, Diane is super … I don’t know … distant, I guess, is how I’d describe her. (Not to everyone, though. That’s just how she acts towards me. To other people she puts on her PRECIOUS,
DEAREST,
DARLING
persona, like she’s some fading movie star from the 1950s.)
Next in the lineup is Oliva—their lone, freakishly beautiful, and dumb as a box of rocks daughter. I know that last part sounds mean and super judgy, but even Oliva acknowledges her cerebral limitations. As Olivia says, if one can choose to be dumb, pretty, and blond, over smart, homely, and mousey—one should choose option A., because, according to Olivia, it’s a scientific fact that blonds have more fun.
(See what I mean? The girl is clueless!)
Last in the Shisbey family lineup is me, the adopted kid diagnosed with the rare memory condition, Highly Superior Autobiographical Memory, or H-SAM
for short, that allows me to recall with computer accuracy every day of my crummy life since the day you last saw me. According to the doctors, I’m the thirteenth documented case in the entire world. (Yay, me! … Not!!! That just makes me UNLUCKY THIRTEEN.)
Whatever I am, it’s not enough for Diane to love me as Olivia continues to remind me on a weekly basis. And if what Olivia said is true, Diane recently called the orphanage (almost 8 years after the fact!) to ask about their return policy.
BUMMER,
Olivia said. All sales at that place are final.
Sometimes I hear my dad and Diane argue about me. (Let me say for the record that my dad is Team Willa
all the way.)
The first time I heard my dad and Diane argue about me, I had gotten up to go pee in the night, and I heard my name. So, I stood on the other side of the door to listen. It was a Wednesday night, six months after I came to live with the Shisbeys. My dad and Diane were in their bedroom, and my dad sounded mad, asking Diane why she never kisses me goodnight, like she does Olivia each night.
I just can’t seem to warm up to her, Ted,
I heard Diane say. I want to, but I can’t. She’s just so …
It took a few seconds