The desire to grow, to become a better version of ourselves, lives in almost all of us. According to Tony Robbins, it's one of the six human needs.



To grow, we have to learn new skills, work with others, and learn how to get out of our own ways.



Rarely does one stop growing because they've run out of skills to learn, or people to work with.



In almost every case, personal growth stalls when perseverance turns into paralysis.



We might still have the desire, but we stop doing the work.



I've found four common reasons people stop taking action toward their goals, and become paralyzed by personal development.





Dreaming Instead of Doing



In every self-help or self-development book, seminar, and course I've ever experienced, there is a point in time when I'm challenged to dream, create a vision, or start setting goals.



The longer I daydream, the longer my list becomes. The longer my list becomes, the more excited I get. It's euphoric.



At some point, I finish the book or the program, and I'm left with my list of goals. Then it's time to go to work.



The euphoria is over. Reality sets in.



This is where the process ends for many people.



Dreaming is exciting. It's easy. It requires nothing more than your imagination.



Doing the work is the hard part. Doing requires initiative. Sometimes the doing can even feel like drudgery.



When it's time to go to work, the excuses start filling the mind.



I don't know enough. I might try and fail. I'm actually too busy this week to get started, so I'll get started next week. I'm going to wait for a better time to get started. Maybe I should read another book or attend another program instead. I don't have enough support yet to get started.



Your mind is never more creative than when it creates excuses and reasons not to pursue your goals. 



Imagining your goals is easy. Taking initiative is difficult. And so, many people end up in perpetual cycles of dreaming, but never doing.



Every great success story involved far more doing than dreaming. 



Read Also: 5 Beliefs that Build Suckituptitude



Comparing Your Results Without Comparing Your Process



If you have a fixed mindset, and compare yourself to others, you see the obstacles you have that prevent you from achieving what you see others achieve. You'll come up with reasons why they have it easy and why you have it so hard.



If you have a growth mindset, and compare yourself to others, you see the opportunity you have to do something someone else has already done. You look for ways to learn from them and follow their lead.



If comparison is leading to complacency or paralysis, you might be seeing things from a fixed mindset.



Comparison can also lead to a distorted perspective.



You see only what someone else has accomplished, but are blind to seeing what they've done and overcome to get there. On the other hand, you know all the struggles you've faced yourself, so you feel like it's unfair that you're not experiencing the same success.



Comparison is the greatest thief of joy.



I love what Vanessa's coach and personal trainer says about comparison:



If you're going to compare yourself to someone else in one thing, you have to compare yourself to him or her in everything.Mark Schneider



If you're going to compare your results to someone else's, you have to compare everything...their experience to your experience, their background to your background, their motivations to your motivations, their purpose to your purpose, their work ethic to your work ethic.



You might look at others' bodies and compare them to yours, but then you have to compare the discipline they have in what they eat and when they exercise. And their genetics. And dozens of other variables.



You might look at others' successes in a corporate role, but then you have consider the hours they poured into their job late at night and on weekends, and compare it to the consistent effort you've put in.