This is a book about self-sabotage. Why we do it, when we do it, and how to stop doing it—for good. Coexisting but conflicting needs create self-sabotaging behaviors. This is why we resist efforts to change, often until they feel completely futile. But by extracting crucial insight from our most damaging habits, building emotional intelligence by better understanding our brains and bodies, releasing past experiences at a cellular level, and learning to act as our highest potential future selves, we can step out of our own way and into our potential. For centuries, the mountain has been used as a metaphor for the big challenges we face, especially ones that seem impossible to overcome. To scale our mountains, we actually have to do the deep internal work of excavating trauma, building resilience, and adjusting how we show up for the climb. In the end, it is not the mountain we master, but ourselves.
Oh, I REALLY wanted to love this. I instantly ordered it after hearing a reviewer on booktok say “this book would have changed my life if I read it in my 20s”. Ok sign me up.... but no. Unfortunately it seemed very similar to the issues I have with poetry and Rupi Kaur’s work, it seemed to be written purely to be posted or quoted on Instagram. That’s what this book was, even down to the formatting (and lack of proper paragraphs, repetitive and generic quotations printed with the intention of relating to a wide array of people on the internet. It didn’t seem genuine unfortunately. I feel like this book had a lot of words but didn’t really actually say anything. Sorry booktok, you let me down!!
Maybe I’m missing something, but this book feels like a recycled mesh of Instagram quotes with a slight expansion on the meaning behind each one. I have read countless self help books and this one struck me as a regurgitation of many of them. The pages are small to begin with and there’s large spaces in between paragraphs and subheadings. Normally to me this means the author did not have enough content to fill a book and wanted to fluff it up a bit. I will not deny that there were some good concepts in the book as far as why do we self-sabotage, but the book really failed to deliver on an action plan that goes beyond just “thinking differently.” I saw a lot of hype for this book on TikTok which sort of leads me to believe that the author/PR team are better at marketing than actual writing. If you’ve never read a self help book before in your life this could be for you. Otherwise, stick to authors with more credentials.
Brianna Wiest’s audiobook also seems like a personal coaching session due to its plethora of insights and practical advice, helping one to recognize the patterns that they have been stuck in, and for them to start to create the routines which they need for growth and fulfillment.
I selected this (audiobook) because I have always been interested in personal development, and I love contemplating the psyche of humans.
It is truly diverse in its subject matter, mentioning self-sabotage, resilience, self-awareness, and emotional intelligence, and is able to discuss these issues authoritatively and in a way that is easy to digest.
I was also drawn to the book because I have had my own struggles with self-doubt and negative habits. I was looking for more than just understanding; I was wanting a way to create real change in my life, and this turned out to be the perfect audiobook. Throughout the discussion, while feeling comforted, I noticed these chills or emotional rushes from her remarks and insights. I loved the fact that it was a way to listen to an author, and then hearing the type of voice that I could read her words in.
Throughout the audiobook, you will feel a range of emotions; you may feel a sense of understanding during some of the more challenging parts where she calls you out on some of your own habits, while at another time you may feel that sense of motivation and empowered by these reminders of your potential. The journey is introspective and emotion, full of challenges and change. When you start caring about yourself and what you put into your body, health becomes part of your life. Some people don’t like what you’re doing but stay committed to your health. Start caring about you and the rest will follow.
When I read self help type books, I'll highlight if I come across something that rings true. I'll use a second stronger color if it provides insight or a new path I hadn't seen/thought of before, or that I had forgotten.
I think I may have marked more of this book than not. Due to the nature of books on self, it's hard to say whether I would recommend this book to you. If you are looking for someone else to provide answers, this isn't the book. This is more like a quiet voice in your ear helping to give you new places to look inside for those answers.
You can find the author's work on Medium if you want a good sampling of her voice/style. It's what led me here. Hope this helps.
I have a bachelor degree in psychology and i work with people living with eating disorders. I figured I'd pick up this book to help with certain patterns and behaviours I've noticed through my professional experiences. I was highly disappointed. It didn't help that I saw this book glorified on TikTok because it set my expectations way too high.
From what I've gathered online, Wiest is a writer and a poet. She seems to have no education or training on psychology or therapy (I couldn't find anything on that). I found that her facts were a little shaky and looking through her references, I could see why. There's 24 references in total for her whole book and very few are scientific articles. Some of it is from psycho-pop online articles and there's even one reference from a LinkedIn post. I believe she based most of her observations on experience, this is not to be diminished, but the book lacked scientific support.
Overall, the tools and strategies she gave were fine. I actually have a few pages with post-its on them. There's some parts of the book that felt empty as if the words were to fill the chapter instead of giving substance. The first two parts were the most helpful to understand self-sabotage and learn about unhealthy patterns of behaviours. The rest was a little repetitive and more inspirational than resourceful.
I won't recommend this book to people who go through self-sabotage tendencies. I believe that good old therapy works best and that there exists other self-help books that are way more scientifically approved. I recommend The Happiness Trap by Dr. Harris to change your perspective on life instead of this one.
Also, there's mentions encouraging diet culture when it is in no way relating to the subject. Eating fast food is not "self-sabotage". It can be part of a balanced diet when you work on your perspective over food and then adjust your behaviours to fulfill your needs (biological and emotional).
2.5 stars because some parts really spoke to me. But the whole thing read like there were 25 pages worth of ideas stretched out to fill 200ish pages. So much repetition, which is what made this otherwise seemingly short read (many spaces, tiny pages) be so hard to get through.
I cannot tell you how much this book has allowed me to see not only how much I self sabotage, but also to feel calm & completely inspired to move forward toward greater things. This is the perfect book for 2020, as we question our lives & all that we stand for. I’m ready to leave my legacy. Thank you Brianna!
This is not a review of what is written in here, as well as how it worked out on me.
To me it came across as a slapped together collection of highly superficial statements taken from motivational speakers. Very real problems that people encounter lik anxiety, depression, lack of self esteem are 'resolved' in about one paragraph each. I tried it since I too wanted to step out of my comfort zone and use it for my personal development. However, it left me disappointed. Not my cup of tea.
This book is great if you wish to understand why we set out determined for certain ideas, ambitions or dreams but catch ourselves acting out of accordance with them. It's a digestible book that gets straight to the point and does not beat around the bush in order to cushion the blow. It definitely invites the reader to take multiple moments of deep self-awareness and ownership. I was really happy to find it didn't veer into the lane of unhealthy positivity and instead encouraged accepting the hard work it takes to truly face what our deepest desires and inner narratives align with.
Read this with a book club. It created a lot of great topics of discussion, prompts to take away for solo-journalling and everyone seemed to thoroughly enjoy.
This is one of the best books I've read in 2021 and that's a huge statement considering how I've been reading like a lunatic this year.
If you are so tired of being too hard on yourself but don't know why and how to stop, this book is for you. If you just feel too much and can't seem to let go of the things hurting you, it's for you.
Long story short, if you're a breathing human being living during these hard times, pick!!! up!!!! this!!! book!!!!
I don't always tell people what to do but I'll do it this time.
I love the style of writing and how the writer validates every single feeling and thought and starts from there instead of offering you unrelated positive suggestions. I've never felt this comforted in a while. I thought, perhaps I wasn't crazy after all.
And this is not the kind of book that only knows how to point what is wrong and leave you dumbfounded. There are action points and guidance on what to do next in every chapter and honestly it's so helpful.
I love this book so much I made a summary document on Notion so even if you don't read it, just go through my notes. Or you can use it as your notes after reading the books.
I'll put the link in my bio.
some extra quotes I loved: • Get angry, determined, and allow yourself to develop tunnel vision with one thing and one thing only at the end: that you will not go on as you are
• Mental strength Is not just hoping that nothing ever goes wrong. It is believing that we have the capacity to handle it if it does.
• Happiness is not something you can chase. It is something you have to allow.
"If you can begin to see your life as a feedback mechanism that is reflecting who you are with the ultimate goal to help you live better and more fully, all of a sudden you realize that it was never the world standing in your way, but your own mind."
This book is great if you truly want to understand the importance of inner peace and gratitude. We need to learn to lean into the little joys when we find them.
this book basically taught me that sometimes even if we make a detailed and organized plan to achieve something and things don't go accordingly then maybe it's not situation or shit maybe it's you who's holding yourself back from achieving the things that are best for you. this book talked about many reasons that could stop you from reaching your highest potential and being the best version of you. it also provides alot of self awareness moments where you can evaluate yourself and know what , where and when did you went wrong.
This book also talks about the depth by which a trauma can effect a person and can be major barrier affecting not only their present but future as well and all of it is just because we're not giving enough attention to things triggering us and we are just trying to find happiness by focusing on what could or might happen in the future not knowing that it actually is a process of disassociation.
It also focuses on the point that happiness is not something you can force but it's something that you can allow. Happiness is not only having your dream job or body or literally anything but it is also taking time to embrace the simplicity of everyday moments. It’s sitting back and reading a book, talking over dinner with someone you love, or just enjoying the small things each day.
It also tells the importance of healing and protecting your inner child as it's nothing but a scared version of you still stuck in that trauma loop. And tbh this book was not just filled up with some overly positive advices, it have some deep, harsh truths that forces you to face the reality as it is rather than creating a delusional version in your head.
honestly this is the best self help book i have read by farrrr! 🤍
The book is filled with ridiculous phrases that can sound like a mantra but is actual bullshit.
“Deep down you know it’s not right” Nope, that’s not how our brain works. Has the author ever hear about childhood trauma? Or any real person? The thing that feels “right” most of the time is what is familiar, and what is familiar is not always good for you. All new things come with discomfort which can feel wrong and very few of us can distinguish what is actually right for us, like being safe and healthy would feel boring and weird for many.
“You might think that trauma is in your head but it’s actually in your body” Dude, your head is literally a part of your body 🤦🏻♀️ like read a biology textbook once. I see that she’s trying to tell something about somatization of mental illness, but damn phrase it better.
And dozens of that throughout the book, like that your mental health would not get better without organising and cleaning your house (probably she never heard about OCD and coping strategies and personality differences either…). And then she’d elaborate with some pretty sentence which essentially sound like an Instagram quote that people put on a darkened flowery background.
The book is basically a collection of half-correct half-stupid advice on well-being which would have been way more scientifically precise and fun (and more time efficient) to watch on Instagram reels from therapists. It’s readable but the content is repetitive, unoriginal, and vague (you know… “spiritual”) and ultimately rather useless and boring.
I shouldn’t have started a book by an author who wrote something called “the truth about everything”. For real? EVERYTHING?! I tried to find her credentials that would justify her teaching others how to live and she seems like a blogger/influencer coming out of nowhere. The only thing you find on her website in “about me” is how many bestsellers she wrote and tour dates (seriously? Book tours are a thing?) and her Instagram feed.
The mountain metaphor when you listen to how she explains also seems problematic cos she essentially tells the reader that whatever is happening the answer (and the problem) is always yourself. (Singing quietly “it’s meee hi I’m the problem it’s meee”). So you know, if you’re poor and have nowhere to live, it’s you, stop building the mountain and get happy. Or if you’re being held back by depression, it’s still you, cos why the hell wouldn’t you clean up your house and get better? Or if you’re being bullied, stop overreacting, it’s you and your stupid human emotions, let it go! So yeah, sometimes I’m the problem it’s me, but dammit author, at least get a smarter editor.
This book is the closest thing to going to therapy without actually going. A book to read multiple times in order to really make use of the learnings. Probably one I will have to read twice a year and study in depth in order to do the internal work each time to make real progress.
I really, really want to love this book because it seems to have a cult following on BookTok and has a promising premise. But it’s ridiculously repetitive and doesn’t bring up any new, groundbreaking ideas I have not heard of before. Nor does it reinforce current ways to escape self-sabotage and help me see them in a new light.
It just feels like someone has taken some points from various Ted Talk vids and put them all together into a book. And then I checked: the author is a poet and writer — which make sense, as the sentences read like one of those healing contemporary poems (a reviewer said this is like Rupi Kaur of Self-Help and.. I have to agree).
“It is very hard to show up as the person you want to be when you are surrounded by an environment that makes you feel like a person you aren’t.”
To be honest, the first few pages were hard to comprehend but it gets easier chapter by chapter. I was honestly scared that this would also feel a little redundant like '101 Essays that will change the way you think' but it actually delivered. It did what it promised. It told the why, when and hows of self-sabotage.
I'm actually surprised how this book made me know myself better. It introduced ideas that I never thought about. It changed my mindset.
sharing my favorite lesson from this book: emotions are temporary, behavior is permanent.
read this book alone then discuss it with others :)
If you only read one book in 2023, please pick this one.
Brianna West steps inside your brain and truly just gets it. From dealing with loss, mental illness, self doubt and so much more, the resulting self sabotage and what you can do to become your true, most authentic self.
Treat your future self and buy a copy here. The audiobook is beautifully narrated too as is available on Scribd and Audible.
A perfect January read, the start of the year where you identify the weeds of your life so you can take off and eventually be ready for harvest. The book started out a bit dry for me but it started to resonate with me midway until the end. The fascinating almost surgical level by which the author digs into how we sabotage ourselves is incredibly educational and insightful. Lots to unpack for me from realizations coming from this book.
O carte care vorbește despre vulnerabilități, despre comportamentele prin care ne autosabotăm, despre situații des întâlnite în viața de zi cu zi, despre gândurile care ne pun bețe în roate, despre greșeli și abordările potrivite. De citit cu mintea deschisă și pregătită să accepte adevăruri pe care le băgăm sub preș.
Man. That is what I mean when I say sometimes one is better off reading nothing at all. I grew stupider with each page. I called it quits halfway through—I don’t have enough IQ points to spare.
The Moutain Is You. Yes, the title is as kitschy as the author’s ideas. The mountain is you; thus, you have to climb (aka explore and master) your own self—blah blah blah. Everything you’ve already heard watching 20 minutes of motivational TikToks. Not a single original idea.
One page, or, actually, one paragraph, no—one sentence of Schopenhauer’s is more valuable than the entirety of this book. He legitimately delves into human nature, mind, and our (in)ability to master ourselves. Brianna just throws polished but empty post-worthy quotes everywhere. Who will gain self-mastery from this? It’s almost satirical.
I hate to sound snobbish (I actually don’t), but we are all better off reading writers who wrote for the sake of principle—not some cash, social media fame, and bestseller author’s title at 28.
There are worthwhile self-help books, but this is not one of them. However, I was bored, so I gathered some quotes that will look good on the Instagram if you are twelve (there isn’t another reason to buy the book):
“Happiness is not something you can chase. It is something you have to allow.”
“Your new life is going to cost you your old one.”
“The greatest act of self-love is to no longer accept a life you are unhappy with.”
O carte cu limbaj accesibil despre autosabotare și despre cine vrei sa devii
“Autosabotarea este atunci când ai doua dorințe contradictorii. Una este conștientă, cealaltă inconstienta. Știi ca vrei sa mergi mai departe in viața, totuși stai pe loc, blocat dintr-un motiv anume.”
Câteva semne care iti dau de înțeles ca probabil te autosabotezi:
👉🏻 Te împotrivești lucrului la un proiect nou, oricare ar fi natura lui.
👉🏻Refuzi sa ieși din zona de confort. “Suntem construiți sa ne simțim cât mai confortabil, și tot ce se afla in afara spațiului de confort pare deosebit de amenințător sau infricosator pana devine familiar.”
👉🏻 Perfecționismul- se întâmpla pentru ca iti este frica de eșec, te simți vulnerabil sau crezi ca nu ești atat de bun pe cât iti dorești sa creadă altii ca suntem.
Și lista de idei poate continua.
👌🏼Mi-a plăcut cartea pentru limbajul ei accesibil, pentru modul in care autoarea a explicat, pe întelesul tuturor, cum ne punem piedici in procesul de dezvoltare, dar mai ales cum putem sa lucram constient la a elimina situațiile de autosabotare.
“Tu ești muntele” este o carte pentru cine se afla intr-o perioada mai grea, de blocaj, care nu este familiara cu terapia sau cu modul in care funcționăm. Mi s-a părut o carte potrivită dacă vrei sa începi sa te cunosti puțin mai bine și sa înțelegi de ce reacționezi in anumite feluri in unele situații.
O carte de self-help clasică. Oferă doar indicații generale pentru a porni în călătoria de autocunoaștere/descoperire de sine. Nu intră foarte mult în detalii, dar pentru cineva care tocmai și-a dat seama că ceva nu e în regulă în propria viață și că ar dori să facă o schimbare, eu zic că e o carte numai bună. Măcar îți oferă niște momente de "aha! deci aici e buba" de la care poți porni. I-am scăzut o steluță fiindcă în ultima treime a cărții autoarea s-a cam repetat, doar cu alte cuvinte. Textul putea fi mai compact. Dar în rest, mi-a plăcut, mi-am luat multe notițe (am ascultat-o ca audiobook) și abia aștept să vorbesc pe canalul de YouTube despre ea. 😊
Never has a book helped me understand myself like this one did and I will be forever grateful I got the chance to read it. It’s a book I think everyone should read to understand the intricacies of themselves (why they think, feel, and act like they do), how to notice their patterns, and how to learn from them. It’s a book that opened a well of untapped emotions in me and pushed me to start the journey of self-mastery I so desperately wanted to do but never knew what was holding me back and now because of Brianna Wiest I do and I am so thankful for her.
Nu că m-aș pricepe eu prea bine la astfel de cărți, dar aș fi vrut mai multe exemple, că așa funcționez și asimilez eu.🤣
În schimb, mi-a plăcut că mi-a confirmat anumite lucruri, mi-a prezentat lucrurile dintr-o altă perspectivă față de cea la care mă gândeam eu. Cred doar că trebuie să o citești la momentul potrivit ca să fie relatable.🧐
This book just didn't work for me. I almost gave up reading it. I think it is structured more like essays and it is missing some connection between chapters. I liked the beginning and the "Mountain" metaphor, but was waiting for other parts to be connected with this.
I really had high hopes for this book but quite frankly...it was riddled with empty platitudes. Don’t get me wrong Wiest included some insightful reminders and interesting "future self" exercises, but for the most part it felt like a surface level observation and continuous simplification of many important, complex and deep topics such as trauma.
There is quite a bit of redundancy throughout this book which eventually becomes tautological, especially when there are generic quotations and ideas mentioned.
It did at times feel vague and painful to read and kind of reminded me of what a Pinterest page would look like… It doesn't convey a lot of value (some chapter titles felt like a collection of empty Instagram slogans).
A few parts of the book were captivating and resonated with me but then drifted off into a massive mountain (no pun intended) of self help cliches... Some quotes I found to be disappointing and degrading as well : “self sabotage is ultimately just a product of low emotional intelligence” p.103 (I mean…really ?!)
« The Mountain Is You » reminded me of a recycled version of ‘101 essays that will change the way you think’ with some concepts and morals being hammered over and over again..
Overall, there’s some solid wisdom within the book, but I think it’s really more of an introduction to growth and self-help rather than a deep dive into concrete actions the reader can put to practice. You could definitely enjoy it if you’re new to self development, but if you’ve been reading about it for some time already, you may not get what you need from this book specifically.
Some nice reminders, but this felt like a surface level observation of many of the topics I’ve read about before. It was a very short read and most definitely could have been longer!
It did at times feel repetitive too. Some good lessons, but I think there are better books out there on this topic!
I think this could be a great book if you’re a beginner to self development, but if you’ve been reading around this topic for some time already, you may not get what you need from this book specifically.
“este momento não é a minha vida. é um momento na minha vida”
Tenho uma relação de amor-ódio com livros de auto-ajuda. Quando encontro um que quero ler, quero MUITO ler e não consigo pensar em mais nada. Quando efetivamente começo a ler…. o entusiasmo baixa bastante.
Apesar de ter mensagens importantes, achei um pouco (muito) repetitivo, por isso não consigo dar mais de 3 estrelas