I want a refund of the hours of my life I WASTED reading this book. [image]
Tristan was an insufferable cunt, and considering (view spoiler)[he got shotI want a refund of the hours of my life I WASTED reading this book. [image]
Tristan was an insufferable cunt, and considering (view spoiler)[he got shot in the fucking shoulder, the pair of fuckwits in this book still fuck DIRECTLY after he's released from hospital and Ford is flipping Tristan over and roughing him up... like he didn't just get his shoulder fucking destroyed. (hide spoiler)]...more
If you've read an o/b/a book before, you've probably read a plot of similar to this before.
Injured omega gets away from a research facility. No scent If you've read an o/b/a book before, you've probably read a plot of similar to this before.
Injured omega gets away from a research facility. No scent ability. Meets alpha. Oh wow, scent is back. /insert dramatic music here. Try scent blockers. Scent blockers don't work, oh noooooooooooooo. Alpha protect. Ohhhh no, a heat, who would have possibly seen this coming? Fucking fucking fucking - knot knot knot... Omega: "bite me" Alpha: "no" *insert complication of story here, make sure Alpha solves complication ✨because Alpha✨* Omega: "bite me" Alpha: "okay" om nom nom nom. FIN. ✨TA-DAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA.✨
The MC's fuck in chapter 1, to find out the next day, the hot mysterious mean looking MC works at the company you just got emWhat do you call it when:
The MC's fuck in chapter 1, to find out the next day, the hot mysterious mean looking MC works at the company you just got employed at... THEN IT WONDERFULLY AND GRACEFULLY TIME SKIP US 5 YEARS... Then have absolutely NO sexual tension or pining or even eye contact during that time... And then the author TELLS you about the last 5 years and all the friendships you've formed... And SHOWS us nothing... Then the romantic interest is finally involved again, and the story goes into slow burn mode... But like... it's SO SLOW BURN, that you can safely assume the gas isn't even connected to the house, let alone the stove you want the relationship to cook on???
Asking for..... myself.
THE WASTED POTENTIAL OF WHAT THIS BOOK SHOULD HAVE BEEN IS CRIMINAL.
Where I roast the shit out of books that are lacking in flavour, spice and depth. However, the spice was NOTWelcome to my cooking channel. (Recipe 3!)
Where I roast the shit out of books that are lacking in flavour, spice and depth. However, the spice was NOT an issue here, if you're spice of choice is cum.. Because you'll either be SO SICK OF CUM by the end of this book, or you'll be close to dying from cumming in your pants. There is no in-between here people. (Also, did you really like this book or are you just horny? #nojudgmenthere)
It's been awhile since a book was worthy of the recipe honour. SO I am happy to be here, without further ado. READY, STEADY, COOK!
This is a super easy one, just chuck all of the following ingredients into a crockpot, set to high, leave your kindle inside and wait until your house burns down....more
I have to say, I’ve finally realised my GREATEST TRIGGER in books is when the WRONG MC apologises and the other mc accepts it like they deserved a fucI have to say, I’ve finally realised my GREATEST TRIGGER in books is when the WRONG MC apologises and the other mc accepts it like they deserved a fucking apology? R u fkn kidding me? GETS ME FOOOOOMING...more
- This book took the wrinkles from my brain, and ironed them. - I think if you google the word “mid” this book might come up as a suggestion. - This b- This book took the wrinkles from my brain, and ironed them. - I think if you google the word “mid” this book might come up as a suggestion. - This book will be good for you, if you think pepper is spicy. Thank you. ...more
Wow. I don't think I have the mental energy to review this? [image]
SO WHAT YOU ARE TELLING ME, IS THAT YOU'RE COMPETING IN A PUMPKIN COMPETITION AND YOWow. I don't think I have the mental energy to review this? [image]
SO WHAT YOU ARE TELLING ME, IS THAT YOU'RE COMPETING IN A PUMPKIN COMPETITION AND YOUR OPPONENT SENDS HIS UNDERAGE SLAVE CHILDREN TO BREAK INTO YOUR PROPERTY AND DESTROY YOUR PUMPKINS THE DAY BEFORE THE COMPETITION, AND YOU'RE TELLING ME, YOUR SWEET"REVENGE" IS TO SNEAK INTO HIS SHED AND FUCK NEXT TO HIS COMPETITION PUMPKINS??? AND THEN PUT THE FUCKING BLANKETS AWAY AFTER???
ARE YOU FUCKING JOKING MY GUY!?
FARMER JOE DESERVED A SMACK WITH A SHOVEL R U KIDDING ME!?
Honestly, just check out my notes if you have a minute or can be bothered because wow. The ideas and intentions of this book were there, but the execution was as rocky as white water rafting, and I was crying trying to hold to my personal enjoyment the whole way through before the book inevitably crashed and burned in a train wreck. ...more
Okay... I've sat overnight, I've stewed, I've contemplated, I've stared at the wall, I've squinted whilst thinking until I've gotten a headache.. and IOkay... I've sat overnight, I've stewed, I've contemplated, I've stared at the wall, I've squinted whilst thinking until I've gotten a headache.. and I have come to the conclusion... that contemporary romance is becoming a genre, that is very underwhelming for me.
How do I even rate or review this, it's just meant to be fluffy, it's low stakes, NO angst..
The scene of the book: A cute lil man who owns a florist, and a personal assistant, they have their meet cute moment at the florist shop over one of the men joking about getting flowers to murder his cheating-ex-boyfriend. It's actually VERY cute sometimes and they are now inlove. That's the whole book in a nutshell if you don't want to read this hahah.
Linden and Keats actually were so flipping, feet swinging cute sometimes, but it was overshadowed with... lovey dovey bullshit that I don't enjoy hahaha. ...more
Welcome to my cooking channel, this is recipe 2, where I roast the shit out of books that are lacking in flavour, spice and depth because it's 2024, aWelcome to my cooking channel, this is recipe 2, where I roast the shit out of books that are lacking in flavour, spice and depth because it's 2024, and I'm not apologising for how I feel about books anymore because *reasons*. ...more
There’s no mystery to this writing style, and I... ✨simply couldn’t care any less if I tried✨
The idea was good, but every part of the execu{DNF - 37%}
There’s no mystery to this writing style, and I... ✨simply couldn’t care any less if I tried✨
The idea was good, but every part of the execution and the dialogue felt forced and unnatural. (Based on my 37% obviously.)
From page one, it’s like “oh have you heard the MC is a witch and sees ghosts and spirits..? Sit down and let me throw 33 mins of dialogue AT YOU about the lore of the land and 48 characters” ...more
So its like... Phantom of the opera, but then make it gay, add some glory holes and a sprinkle of voyeurism and... ✨voilà✨ you get this book? Sounds gSo its like... Phantom of the opera, but then make it gay, add some glory holes and a sprinkle of voyeurism and... ✨voilà✨ you get this book? Sounds good right??!......... only........ it's not ...more
Me when someone asks me how I feel about LM's latest book: [image]
It is with utmost anguish, grief and sadness, that I inform you...
Time of death (dnf)Me when someone asks me how I feel about LM's latest book: [image]
It is with utmost anguish, grief and sadness, that I inform you...
Time of death (dnf): 52%
As a Lily fan,I am utterly devastated and as such will not be answering any questions at this time, unless it's... "how many times did they talk about balls in this book?" In which case, I will tell you, is approximately, if not accurately 89 times... ...more
To clarify first and foremost, I actually did like this book over all. (And there are spoilers below) [image]
I did have an issue, or 39...
The first halfTo clarify first and foremost, I actually did like this book over all. (And there are spoilers below) [image]
I did have an issue, or 39...
The first half of the book, CHEFS KISS!!! It's a very short period of “nemesis” to friends, that turns into a blooming “friendship/“idiots” before turning to lovers. It was tender, it was cute, it was feet-swinging goodness watching these two be totally in love whilst being “straight”, there was confusion, there was growth is Silas as a character who deals with some neurodivergence/mental health issues, it was really setting up for an amazing relationship between these two. It was cosy, low angst, Perfect PERfect PERFECT…
AND THEN... they found their dicks, and it all fizzled and back tracked completely. ...more
I'm so sorry in advance, and I LOVE ME SOME SAXON JAMES AIIGHT, I AIN'T NO HATER.... (except in this one case sorryI'm so sorry in advance, and I LOVE ME SOME SAXON JAMES AIIGHT, I AIN'T NO HATER.... (except in this one case sorry...more
Time of death: 14% Smashed that dnf button. (I'm so sorry to my buddy reader, I hope you love it and it's everything you've ever wanted xxxx)
In case yoTime of death: 14% Smashed that dnf button. (I'm so sorry to my buddy reader, I hope you love it and it's everything you've ever wanted xxxx)
In case you (anyone reading this review) need help working this out in the first 10%, he may or may not have a lip ring? I'm only speculating though after reading about this stupid fucking lip ring 45782 times in the first 48 pages.
The dialogue was cringy and m/f just isn't my jam 99% of the time anyway so I was struggling. Plus I read this book is all about cheating which made me feel icky from the start. The FMC is irrationally pissed off and rude to her "new housemate" who she's obviously very sexually attracted to, but she just straight up awful in general??
Basing my opinion off 14% though I guess which is rough, but I choose violence and raw dogging my feelings in 2024 and plan on dnf-ing every book that I dislike because I ain't sitting through 7.5 hours of BS because I'm being too stubborn to drop a crap book lol <3
I have felt more sexual chemistry and connection with an unwashed potato at the supermarket, than I felt between any of these characters.
There are so I have felt more sexual chemistry and connection with an unwashed potato at the supermarket, than I felt between any of these characters.
There are so many FLAT plot points.
There are TOO MANY fucking characters to try to care about… and shock horror, not a single fucking care was given to ANY of these characters.
The lore/atmosphere in this “dystopian world” are not clear… so there is like zombies and walls and death and destruction and food shortages, but also a city with a night club? And some people get conscripted to the army/fight for the world against zombies, but others just don’t? And are just living life? Going to the park with their dogs and shit??? Tehe…. But fr, what the fuck is going on here?
They only seem to wear army clothes the whole book, so I’m unsure of who the cuties on the cover are.
There are straight up mistakes. (Like counteracting sentences that will give you a stroke when you’re trying to understand if the sentence makes sense or you’re just dumb)
Spice was underwhelming. DON’T EAT ASS AFTER A WHOLE DAY OF ACTIVITIES KIDS, UNSANITARY MY DUDES
Plot underwhelming. I hate when authors really STRESS A PLOT POINT AT YOU….… example: “oh there’s a man who’s been conscripted, and he’s really unhappy, he will give you trouble and be hard to work with”
And instead of him being very difficult, and making life hell like it was implying….he literally is just standoffish and lowkey rude for one day….? Okay then….?
/insert that sound that says… “I hope you’re hungry… FOR NOTHING”
One mc cries a lot and the other is supposed to be a captain but does nothing captain-y towards mr cry baby, because ✨feelings✨
I’m sorry, this book was ridiculous. The writing was pretty good, I feel like if the book got some proper work done, it could have been a good story.
There were parts during the ending I was interested momentarily… and then something fucking dumb would happen, like everyone would seemingly forget how their friends just died horrifically and start making jokes about swimming pools on yachts. Weird but okay.
**spoiler alert** I was thinking about this book because all I could remember was one mc getting railed on a piano in a forest, which admittedly, was **spoiler alert** I was thinking about this book because all I could remember was one mc getting railed on a piano in a forest, which admittedly, was the best part of this entire book ...more
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