The character, Jeri, who would have been an awesome character if not for the cheap writing, continuously w2.5 stars - It was alright, an average book.
The character, Jeri, who would have been an awesome character if not for the cheap writing, continuously worsened this book. Jeri is gender fluid (male vs female depending on if it was day or night, at sea or on land). That’s cool, diversity is great. But Jeri explained this a dozen times to anyone and everyone immediately upon meeting them. The reader is continuously pulled out of the story to be beat over the head with this as it is repeatedly forced into the dialogue in the most awkward of ways.
There were also several situations in which the characters are backed into a corner and a miracle happens just in the nick of time to turn things around, very convenient. This was done again and again and again.
This series is the first I have read by the author and I was very impressed by the first two. But this conclusion comes across as cheap, generic, tropey YA fodder. ------------------------------------------- Favorite Quote: I have found that building a sandbox around a domineering child, then allowing that child to preside over it, frees the adults to do the real work.
First Sentence: It is with abiding humility that I accept the position of High Blade of MidMerica. ...more
So you’re telling me that in 2018 this book won the Pulitzer Prize, Lambda Award, AND the Andrew Carnegie Medal? Wow, the1.5 stars - I didn't like it.
So you’re telling me that in 2018 this book won the Pulitzer Prize, Lambda Award, AND the Andrew Carnegie Medal? Wow, the back 70% must be mind-blowing, because the first 30% was just mind-numbing. ------------------------------------------ First Sentence: From where I sit, the story of Andrew Less is not so bad. ...more
New York Times bestselling author Tarryn Fisher delivers a pulse-pounding, fast-paced suspense novel that will leave you 1.5 stars - I didn’t like it.
New York Times bestselling author Tarryn Fisher delivers a pulse-pounding, fast-paced suspense novel that will leave you breathless. A thriller you won’t be able to put down!
The blurb above...all lies. This is a slow-moving suspense novel with very few twists that will leave you bored with a sluggish pulse.
The main character is also an over the top baby worshiper, frequently making vomit-inducing statements that are insulting and demeaning to women with the implication that we are only as worthy as our wombs.
My empty womb has made me feel like I’m not a real woman, not worthy of my husband’s love.
Our existence together is a shallow one. If not for children, what is there? Sex? Companionship? Is anything more important than bringing life into the world? I reach up absently to lay a hand on my womb. Forever empty.
I trudged through hoping it would end with the thrilling twisty plot that was promised. Instead, it ended in a ludicrous, nonsensical manner that was utterly disappointing. Continuing to read it until the end was my mistake and I wish I could trade those wasted hours in on a better book. I would be extremely reluctant to read another work by this author. ------------------------------------------- Favorite Quote: No one tries hard to keep their husband unless they’ve already lost him.
First Sentence: He comes over on Thursday every week....more
Reads like multiple rambling vignettes stitched together. The reader feels like they do not know what is going on, becaus1.5 stars - I didn't like it.
Reads like multiple rambling vignettes stitched together. The reader feels like they do not know what is going on, because, there is nothing really going on.
I preferred The Night Circus, which I blasphemously found to also be overrated and underwhelming. So...I’m thinking this author is not the best fit for me, though she is well-loved by many others.
DNF’d around 35% through, about 180 pages. ------------------------------------------- First Sentence: There is a pirate in the basement....more
Recommended for readers that enjoy poetic or lyrical prose novels. It’s not my favorite style and while this book was in no way2 stars - Meh. Just ok.
Recommended for readers that enjoy poetic or lyrical prose novels. It’s not my favorite style and while this book was in no way bad, it was just ok and I don’t expect I will remember much about it a few months from now. ------------------------------------------- Favorite Quote: Some evenings I don’t know where the old pains end and the new ones begin. Feels like the older you get the more they run into one long, deep aching.
First Sentence: But that afternoon there was an orchestra playing. ...more
2 stars = Meh. Intriguing enough to finish, but not enough to like it.
Lots of angst and cringy sappiness, but I should have expected that since it’s a2 stars = Meh. Intriguing enough to finish, but not enough to like it.
Lots of angst and cringy sappiness, but I should have expected that since it’s about teenagers playing at being grown. So many people raved about this one that I had to give it a chance. It was not bad perse, but it’s not for me. This excerpt may help you decide if you’d enjoy it:
She was drowning in sandalwood and sunlight. Time ceased to be more than a notion. Her lips were hers one moment. And then they were his. The taste of him on her tongue was like sun-warmed honey. Like cool water sliding down her parched throat. Like the promise of all her tomorrows in a single sigh. When she wound her fingers in his hair to draw her body against his, he stilled for breath, and she knew, as he knew, that they were lost. Lost forever. In this kiss. ------------------------------------------- First Sentence: It would not be a welcome dawn.
Favorite Quote: A shared history does not entitle you to a future....more
Unlike the majority of Goodreads readers, I found the author’s All Soul’s Trilogy to be underwhelming and overrated, despite ha2 stars - Meh. Just ok.
Unlike the majority of Goodreads readers, I found the author’s All Soul’s Trilogy to be underwhelming and overrated, despite having a plot synopsis that rang several of my trigger bells. Comparing the author to Diana Gabaldon and Neil Gaiman is, shall we say, misleading.
I picked this one up under the impression that it is a stand alone novel. It is actually more of the same dull, passionless characters, except now you also have the tedium of parenting toddlers included. But wait, there’s more! In this novel you will also find characters that are the most special kind of special - 3 especially special characters to be exact. Newsflash for authors and publishers - readers are incredibly over this trope!
On a positive note, I must admit that Persephone was a brilliant name choice for the kitty. However, Harkness and I are simply not a great fit for one another, and I do not intend to pick up another novel by her. ------------------------------------------- Favorite Quote: You’ll be wanting to ripen a bit more before you take me on.
First Sentence: On her last night as a warmblood, Phoebe Taylor had been a good daughter.
DNF’d at 58% (278 pages). Brilliant start that grabs you right away but after those first couple chapters, you just wonde1.5 stars - I didn't like it.
DNF’d at 58% (278 pages). Brilliant start that grabs you right away but after those first couple chapters, you just wonder endlessly through dullness, reading much about superfluous boring activities like knitting. (No offense to knitters, but that’s not how this book is sold in the synopsis and I can only imagine that knitting is far more interesting to do than to read about.)
Most GR reviewers, as well as a few authors that I respect, rave about her writing, but I found it mostly to be stilted and elementary to middle school level in quality and complexity. Since I’m clearly in the minority, in fairness below is an excerpt so you can judge the writing for yourself.
Panova Mandelstam and I held the reins of the horses while Panov Mandelstam and Algis stamped down the snow around an open place. Horses are much bigger than goats. I was a little scared of them, but I had to help hold them, and they only stayed still and did not jump like goats did, and I could tell they were very tired. Finally we led the horses in the open place and then we took all the blankets from the sleigh and covered them with the blankets. Panov Mandelstam took the bags out of the sleigh and put them in the little hollow, and then he helped Panova Mandelstam climb down from the sleigh and over the snow to sit on them.
Then he straightened up and looked at Algis. Algis was standing next to the back of the sleigh. His head was hanging. He said, low, “I didn’t fill the bucket.” He meant the grain bucket. So there was no food for the horses.
There are numerous POV narrators with new ones being introduced frequently and switches happen multiple times within each chapter. The author gives no delineation or heading to imply who is speaking and since all the characters “sound” alike (flat, 1-D, cardboard), it can take a few paragraphs to use context clues to figure out who is narrating. This made for a fragmented reading experience. Especially since each narrator speaks in 1st person (eye roll), there is no excuse for all the characters “sounding” the same. It did not help that the audiobook narrator scarcely changes her voice or inflection to imply it is a new character speaking. So no matter which format you utilize, it ends in frustrated disappointment.
This was my 2nd novel by the author, the first being the also much-hyped, Uprooted. I went back and read my review for it which was also a bored 1.5 stars with subpar narration that was DNF'd at just over ½ way through the book. So at least she’s consistent. I will say she has strong beginnings, but as for me, no matter how hyped her future books are, I shall not be tempted. There are far, far, far, far, far, far, far better fantasy books to be read. ------------------------------------------- First Sentence: The real story isn’t half as pretty as the one you’ve heard....more
The plot of this story was engaging and there are quotable passages. However, the author’s message is beat2.5 stars - It was alright, an average book.
The plot of this story was engaging and there are quotable passages. However, the author’s message is beat over your head so repetitively that the book starts to feel like a monotonous slog. Between the author’s overt white guilt, clichés and character caricatures, the novel screamed of in-authenticity and patronization. Obviously, this book worked for many other readers though so ymmv, but I was disappointed in my first Picoult read and will be hesitant to reach for another. ------------------------------------------- Favorite Quote: I smile. But like anything you wear that doesn't fit, it pinches.
First Sentence: The miracle happened on West Seventy-fourth Street, in the home where Mama worked....more
After much buzz about this one, particularly regarding the audiobook with celebrity cast, I am surprised to be setting this one aside almost immediateAfter much buzz about this one, particularly regarding the audiobook with celebrity cast, I am surprised to be setting this one aside almost immediately (around 7% in). The audio version is chaotic with no clear delineation of which character each voice represents, with rapid transitions between narrators. I may return to it as a visual read in the future, but Lincoln's opening poop soliloquy does not have me exactly eager to jump back into the story....more
I cherish my hand-selected group of Goodreads reviewers and friends as they so rarely lead me astray. But yet, sometimes,1.5 stars - I didn't like it.
I cherish my hand-selected group of Goodreads reviewers and friends as they so rarely lead me astray. But yet, sometimes, they do in fact lead me astray.
Maybe I didn’t give it long enough, but this one was DNF’d at just over 20% through. The dialogue was overly simplistic and stilted and everything else was just too blah and meh, making it feel like a chore to return to the book. Life’s too short and the TBR pile is too long. ------------------------------------------- First Sentence: History has failed us, but no matter. ...more
Looking at the long list of my trusted Goodreads friends’ ratings of 4-5 stars and 2.5 stars - It was alright, an average book.
Dear potential reader,
Looking at the long list of my trusted Goodreads friends’ ratings of 4-5 stars and all of the award long-lists it made….maybe you should try this one for yourself. Clearly, it didn’t work any literary miracles for me. Taken one paragraph at a time it seemed to hold promise, but as a whole I found it to be lackluster and never felt any engagement or connection to the story. ------------------------------------------- Favorite Quote: It interests me how we find ways to feel superior to another person, another group of people. It happens everywhere, and all the time. Whatever we call it, I think it’s the lowest part of who we are, this need to find someone else to put down.
First Sentence: There was a time, and it was many years ago now, when I had to stay in a hospital for almost nine weeks....more
You will find this book hilarious if you laugh your head off while hanging out with or listening to 13-15 year olds talk to one2 stars - Meh. Just ok.
You will find this book hilarious if you laugh your head off while hanging out with or listening to 13-15 year olds talk to one another. It wasn’t for me, as I didn’t appreciate that type of immature humor even when I was 13-15 years old. There were also no feels. ------------------------------------------- Favorite Quote: One thing I've learned about people is that the easiest way to get them to like you is to shut up and let them do the talking.
First Sentence: I have no idea how to write this stupid book. ...more
Dear Goodreads Choice Award for Humor Nominee Voters of 2015, you chose poorly.
Completely befuddled as to why this rubbish 1 star - I really hated it.
Dear Goodreads Choice Award for Humor Nominee Voters of 2015, you chose poorly.
Completely befuddled as to why this rubbish has received such high reviews. I would only suggest it to those readers that can't get enough of that one friend that incessantly talks about themselves and their mundane life without ever caring or bothering to listen to a single iota about the lives of others. It is also a fantastic read for folks that love disjointed incoherent prattle that is randomly thrown together in a way that creates a truly impressive insult to literature. Please allow me to share an excerpt (this is a continuous excerpt, not random selections pieced together). If you put a bunch of chameleons on top of a bunch of chameleons on top of a bowl of Skittles what would happen? Is that science? Because if so, I finally get why people want to do science. * * * I should start the Museum of Missing Stuff. It’d be filled with empty glass cases of stuff that’s not there. Also, a giant room of stray socks and keys. And my sense of rationalism. And Victor’s sense of whimsy. And his patience. That place would be crammed. We might have to expand. * * * People who think it’s so hard to find a needle in a haystack are probably not quilters. Needles find you. Just walk on the haystack for a second. You’ll find the needle. They’re worse than floor-Legos. And if that doesn’t work just burn some f***ing hay. They should change “like finding a needle in a haystack” to “like finding a pen that works in that drawer filled with pens that don’t work.” * * * People wonder how Victor and I have stayed married for so long even though he’s Republican and I’m super liberal. I think it all comes down to communication and compromise. Like last week when Victor said, “If you renew your PETA membership I will run over a squirrel.” He’s bluffing though. Unless he was in someone else’s car. * * * I’m allergic to latex and it makes me break out in a rash so most condoms are out for me because the last thing any of us wants is a vagina rash. The alternative is the ones made of sheepskin, but it always creeps me out because does that mean Victor and I are having sex with a sheep? A dead sheep, actually. So it’s bestiality and necrophilia. And a three-way, I think.
As a final bit of torture, I chose (poorly) this one in audiobook format which is read by the author. She like totally has the most annoying valley girl accent, like everrrrrrrrr. DNF'd without hesitation at 10%.
P.s. Ms. Lawson, "Funny" does not mean what you think it means. ------------------------------------------- First Sentences: No, no. I insist you stop right now. Seriously, people, heed her instructions. ...more
This could be the first addition to a new genre, literary erotica(lite). If that makes you excited or more interested to 1.5 stars - I didn't like it.
This could be the first addition to a new genre, literary erotica(lite). If that makes you excited or more interested to read it, don't set yourself up for disappointment. The moral of the review is that if you write about sex for almost 300 pages (75% of the book) and still end up with a monotonous, tedious, unprovocative novel, then something has gone disastrously wrong.
The author "tells" you that the couple have this epic, out of this world love for one another, but all you are "shown" is a superficial, childish, unhealthy relationship driven by lust, which could never be confused for love.
The first half, Fates, is told from the husband's point of view and was utterly painful to read. The husband is a caricature of every hero cliché and trope - handsome, rich, charming, intelligent, etc. This almost worthless part of the book was filled with a trashy log of his sexual conquests (don't get excited - the sex is all very uninspiring), with scattered catty gossip for added mental torture. There was absolutely no substance a reader could sink their teeth into - just pretentious fluffiness that aspired to be bold, but fell far short of the goal.
The second half, Furies, is told from the wife's point of view and is a marked improvement from the 1st half of the novel (but still only worthy of an average rating, at best). More salacious sex but at least there is some sort of depth to the story and the brief glimpses of the interesting character, Antoinette, create a spark of interest.
What a horrible disappointment from my most anticipated Fall release. It is simply a shallow read that I won't remember by the end of the month. And that huge "shocking" twist at the end of the book? Yawn. Not shocked. No cares to give.
I seriously doubt I will ever be tempted to pick up another book by this author; We're clearly not a fit for one another. If you'd like to also read a positive take on this one from one of my trusted reviewers (we can't see eye to eye on every thing or life would be boring!) then I recommend checking out Leanne's review . ------------------------------------------- Favorite Quote: More than the highlights, the bright events, it was in the small and the daily where she’d found life.
First Sentence: A thick drizzle from the sky, like a curtain’s sudden sweeping....more
This was the first novel I have read by V.E. Schwab and it honestly did not meet expectations. A plot driv2.5 stars - It was alright, an average book.
This was the first novel I have read by V.E. Schwab and it honestly did not meet expectations. A plot driven YA fantasy that did not stand out from others in the genre. Maybe this was not the best place to start with her books, but with it’s average rating being over 4 I am going to assume it is a fair representation of her work, which in my eyes is overhyped.
I think there is better writing in the fantasy world but for readers that are more about the plot than characterization and enjoy YA novels, I can see where this series would be an excellent choice.
I’m still interested in reading her other series, Villains, which is written for adults, but I don’t anticipate to read any more of her YA works. ------------------------------------------- Favorite Quote: I'd rather die on an adventure than live standing still.
First Sentence: Kell wore a very peculiar coat. ...more
DNF’ing at 55%. There’s nothing in particular that I dislike about this novel, but at over halfway through I still am not1.5 stars - I didn't like it.
DNF’ing at 55%. There’s nothing in particular that I dislike about this novel, but at over halfway through I still am not engaged or interested in seeing what happens next. If you do read this one, I do not recommend the audio version as the narrator has a very rhythmic reading pattern that some (moi) may find annoying. I don’t believe reading a print (e-ink) version would have made a significant difference in my overall reaction, but it could have only improved the experience. ------------------------------------------- Favorite Quote: And I wasn't old enough to be wise, so I loved her more, not less, because I knew she would be taken from me soon.
First Sentence: Our Dragon doesn’t eat the girls he takes, no matter what stories they tell outside our valley. ...more
I failed to see why this one is so highly reviewed. For me it read as though each chapter could have been the basis for an epis2 stars - Meh. Just ok.
I failed to see why this one is so highly reviewed. For me it read as though each chapter could have been the basis for an episode on a cheesy Hallmark series.
------------------------------------------- First Sentence: The worst winter in fifty years, the old Scotsman had told me. ...more
Like all post-apocalyptic novels, this one made me thankful for all of the little conveniences and pleasures in life that are t2 stars - Meh. Just ok.
Like all post-apocalyptic novels, this one made me thankful for all of the little conveniences and pleasures in life that are too often taken for granted. Unfortunately, "like all post-apocalyptic novels" sums this book up completely as I do not feel the author brought anything new to the genre. Out of the huge cast of main characters, I did not find anyone particularly interesting and I never became attached to any of them. I don't think I will recall very much about this book after a few weeks have gone by. As is all too often the case, this book is not worthy of the recent hype and attention it has received.
------------------------------------------- Favorite Quote: Hell is the absence of the people you long for.
First Sentence: The king stood in a pool of blue light, unmoored. ...more
Oh wow, that was bad. The vast majority of the time it was just tedious and boring as you plod slowly along through stilt1.5 stars - I didn't like it.
Oh wow, that was bad. The vast majority of the time it was just tedious and boring as you plod slowly along through stilted dialogue, short sentences and repetitive motherly concerns/comments. You keep waiting for the creepiness, but it never shows itself, and eventually you just don't care anymore. At the very end, you finally move from boredom to overly dramatic, cheesy, obnoxiousness. The main character, Malorie, has an extremely annoying habit of repeating herself when anxious, such as "No, no, no, no, no" or "The baby's coming, the baby's coming, the baby's coming" or "Want to see my baby, want to see my baby, want to see my baby". You get the idea. Unfortunately, she's anxious a lot. I was just anxious for it to be over.
--------------------------------------------- Favorite Quote: It's better to face madness with a plan than to sit still and let it take you in pieces.
First Sentence: Malorie stands in the kitchen, thinking....more
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