How do you handle negative feedback from rejected referrals?

1 Be honest and respectful

The first thing you need to do is to be honest and respectful with your referral. Don't make false promises, sugarcoat the rejection, or blame someone else. Explain that the hiring decision is not personal, but based on the company's needs, criteria, and process. Acknowledge their feelings and thank them for their interest and effort. If possible, offer some constructive feedback or advice on how they can improve their chances for future opportunities. Avoid sharing confidential information or criticizing the company or the hiring manager.

2 Set boundaries and expectations

The second thing you need to do is to set boundaries and expectations with your referral. Don't let them pressure you to intervene, advocate, or negotiate on their behalf. Explain that you have no control or influence over the hiring decision, and that you respect the company's policies and procedures. Don't let them vent or rant to you endlessly, or make you feel guilty or responsible for their rejection. Politely redirect them to other resources or support systems, such as career coaches, mentors, or counselors. And don't let them discourage you from making future referrals or participating in the ERP.

4 Maintain communication and relationship

The fourth thing you need to do is to maintain communication and relationship with your referral. Don't ghost them, ignore them, or avoid them after the rejection. Follow up with them and check in on their well-being and job search progress. Express your appreciation and support, and remind them of their strengths and achievements. Keep them updated on any relevant news or opportunities at your company or elsewhere. And stay in touch and nurture your connection, whether it's personal or professional.

5 Handle criticism and complaints

The fifth thing you need to do is to handle criticism and complaints from your referral. Sometimes, despite your best efforts, your referral may not accept the rejection gracefully, and may lash out at you, the company, or the hiring manager. They may accuse you of misleading them, wasting their time, or sabotaging their chances. They may also badmouth you or the company to others, or post negative reviews online. How do you deal with this? First, don't take it personally or react defensively. Second, listen empathetically and acknowledge their frustration and disappointment. Third, restate the facts and the reasons for the rejection, and point out any positive aspects or feedback. Fourth, ask them what they want or expect from you or the company, and try to find a reasonable solution or compromise. Fifth, if they persist or escalate, set clear limits and boundaries, and end the conversation respectfully.

6 Seek support and feedback

The sixth thing you need to do is to seek support and feedback from your employer. Handling negative feedback from rejected referrals can be stressful and challenging, and you may need some help or guidance. Don't hesitate to reach out to your manager, HR, or the ERP coordinator for assistance or advice. They can provide you with resources, tools, or training to improve your referral skills and experience. They can also help you address any issues or concerns that may arise from your referral's behavior or feedback. And they can give you recognition and rewards for your contribution and participation in the ERP.