My friend, a mother of a toddler, decided to experiment with when to disclose having a child during job interviews to see how employers would react. In the second round of interviews for one job, she met with three people. The first two interviews convinced her it wasn't the right place. Then she met the company president, a woman with adult children. Hoping for a better reaction, my friend brought up her toddler. The President's reaction was negative, making it clear this wasn’t the right fit. She then looked for a role outside her industry, using a LinkedIn connection. In her second-round interview, all the panelists were women who responded positively when she talked about her toddler. They shared stories about their own children and created an instant connection. She knew this company was the right fit. Now, in her new role, she’s surrounded by colleagues with 20-35 years at the company. This company truly supports families, and she plans on staying until retirement. Your family is a blessing, not a burden; if they don’t get it, find an Employer who does. ♻️ Give this a like, or re-post to spread the word. PS. Don't make us choose between family and a company. The choice will always be Family. Mothers/Fathers- can you relate?
As someone whose mom recently had a series of strokes, employers need to be supportive not only of parents with young kids but also of those with aging parents. I was literally in my 1st days of a "mostly remote" contract with the YMCA when I had to tell my new manager that I needed to be 10 hours away to support my dad and spend time with my mom. Her immediate reaction was "family comes first". Without hesitation, she allowed me the flexibility to work fully remotely (and sometimes weird hours in order to get it all done) so that I could help my parents during this very stressful time. Flexibility matters.
I remember when I interviewed for one of the largest pharmaceutical companies. 3 were on panelists and when I brought up me being a mom of 7. The shift in the interview changed. Many of us who are moms can multi-task, plan projects, schedule, and time management, be critical thinkers, and communicate. In no way does being a mom hinder us from doing our jobs. I think we are the best employees. “No shade to the ones who are not moms.” I think it is biased and unethical to tell us we can get hired cause we are moms. I would say the last company I worked for was very accommodating to me when I got hired. I was only 2 months pregnant when I started with the company. My youngest is 2 years old. The team was very nice and the Director and PM created a department for me. I was the best at what I did and was a top performer. Things change when they hired a guy manager he was an asshole. So I resigned it started to affect my mental health. The most important thing to me is my family. Understand that being a mom we should not be ashamed to talk about in an interview. When will things change for us to be accepted in a great company where we can flourish.
I know of someone who worked night and day, making lots of sacrifices for an organization, at the expense of taking care of her child, as a single parent, including managing her office while the bosses stay home during Covid, running errands to make things run smoothly. Only because she wants to keep her job. The person got sick due to being burnt out. Ask for days off and it was denied. On doctor advise the person was advise to work from home. The person continues to work, though not fully recovered. The person was terminated for inability to be present in the office. Imagine that.
My Mom was a divorced parent. The day I had to walk home from school - 2 miles, in heels! - because I missed the school bus was my first lesson in time management. (And then, after I got home, I changed my shoes and walked 3.5 miles on my paper route!) As an adult, I have had two experiences with working parents and their coworkers: 1. Those that know their work supports their family, and that to support their family they need to work. Their coworkers are happy to step-up when an actual emergency/crisis arises because they see that the boundaries between work and home life are respected. 2. Those that consider every phone call/text from their children to be an emergency and drop everything in the laps of their coworkers to handle as they dash out the door, not to return until the next morning. Their coworkers despise them, and go on to become managers who refuse to hire women with children who do not yet drive. ___________ TL; DR: I can see both sides.
I went back to work when my daughter was 3 and I remember how difficult job hunting was. I had several interviews that went perfectly up until the point I mentioned I was a mom. It really broke my heart to feel like the best thing in my life was being viewed as undesirable in the corporate world. I was told by a recruiter not to mention my daughter to anyone in interviews but I didn’t listen. 🙂
I remember in my 20s interviewing for a sales job and I was flatout asked "do you have any children or are you planning on having them anytime soon?" I responded with "what does that have to do with this job? I feel like that is not an acceptable interview question." The interviewer seemed to be really embarrassed and changed the subject. I got a rejection letter a few days later. I always think about this instance and how sad I was in that moment.
Can't we see that parents actually make the best employees? We've mastered the art of multitasking, crisis management, and functioning on minimal sleep. AND, we can negotiate with terrorists (aka toddlers).
When I first started working, I was the youngest person in the office. Everyone was older (to me) and had children and families. We had to work every other Saturday, that’s just what we did. I volunteered to work every Saturday, stay late if someone asked me to because I didn’t have the responsibilities they had. Seems there’s no flexibility like that anymore. But then again, this was “back in the day”.
When I moved to Texas to escape an abusive husband, my son was only 9 months old. I was hired for a position working the graveyard. After a month my baby started bleeding from his ears. Rushed him to hospital fearing meningitis. I kept my boss posted. One night I went home to shower and my boss had left this voicemail: “ We need you to come back to work. We cannot run a business around you and your sick baby”. I left him a voicemail and told him to run his business without me. Two weeks later HR called me to apologize but I refused to go back.
I'm a single mother of five children. At this point 3 are grown and out of the house and I have two teenagers left. I'll never forget 16 years ago when the company I worked for brought in a new COO (she had a 6 week old). When we had our initial meeting, she told me, that my schedule that allowed me to work 6am-3pm so I could pick up my children would not work anymore and that me being a single mother made me an undesirable employee. In that same meeting there was no mention that I was a top producer and managed 10 TIMES the number of accounts of any other account manager. It's sad that in so many jobs we're not evaluated on our merit, work or dedication.